The Moon Divides
by enitsirk
Summary: “You can’t say that,” he said quietly, getting up and heading for the door. “Everyone deserves a chance to change. Just as you tried to prove that to your mother, one day she’s going to prove it to you. Everyone deserves a second chance.” COMPLETE
1. Prologue

The Moon Divides  
Prologue

"Do you think we should have come this way?" whispered a petrified 8-year-old Remus Lupin to his twin sister, Rachael.

"I don't know; it was _your_ idea to come this way!" she whispered, equally scared. The two had been walking in the forest for over an hour, trying to find their way back to their home after going on an unsuccessful trip to the market. The twins were the only children of Anna and Gregory Lupin. Remus and Rachael both had sandy brown hair and deep green eyes. They were both the same height and relatively the same weight. Even though they were a boy and girl, they looked so much alike and right now they were wearing identical frightened expressions.

The forest was their least favourite place to be and Remus was now wondering why he had chosen to come this way. For the past hour, they had been hearing low frequency growls coming from behind them, getting louder and louder with every step the two twins took. The _drip drops_ of water splashed onto the ground from the tree branches above, echoing mysteriously throughout the vast woods. The grass was wet beneath their feet and squished as they walked. Every now and then, a squirrel would scuttle up a tree and disappear in the canopy.

The twins walked close together, taking very slow and quiet steps. Remus would look behind them once in a while to check if anything was behind them, but each time he just saw the seemingly endless forest. The growling grew closer and closer, but they never saw anything. What _was_ it?

Then they stopped.

Right in front of them was a fully-grown black, yellow piercing eyed werewolf. It was hunched forward, baring its fangs at the two. There was foam growing in the corners of its mouth, and it bore its yellow eyes into the twins' green ones. It inched forward, looking at them hungrily. The two backed up gradually, not daring to look away from the wolf.

Then, without warning, it sprang forward.

"Rachael, run!" Remus yelled.

Rachael could not move; she was locked to the spot. Remus ran behind her and grabbed her by the collar of her shirt. She turned around and ran with him through the forest, dodging tree trunks, low branches. They hopped over the roots protruding from the grounds, and struggled to avoid the squirrels running across the floor.

They hid behind a tree, gasping for breath.

"You think it's gone?" Rachael asked breathlessly.

Remus turned to look. There it was, still chasing them. "No! Run!"

They continued their escape, running for their very lives, not wanting to be the wolf's prey. Dashing down a slope they went, the wolf still on their trail. Remus had fallen behind his sister. She turned to see that he was only a little behind, but her fright kept her running.

"Keep going!" he yelled. He quickened his pace and went after his sister.

Rachael kept turning her head to see if her brother was all right, but when she turned, she did not notice the tree and it was too late.

Everything went black - the forest, the trees, the wolf, her brother.


	2. What happened?

Chapter Two  
What Happened?

"Bad, very bad... couldn't possibly get any worse," a voice muttered in the far off distance. Rachael wanted to open her eyes so badly to see who was talking, but she was much too tired. Her head was spinning, aching, throbbing, it was all so painful.

"How bad is it? What happened?" said a second voice, a woman's voice.

Trying with all her might, Rachael opened her eyes to see the fuzzy outline of a middle-aged, short, brown-haired woman standing mere feet away from her. _She looks familiar_, Rachael thought, unable to think straight. The woman glanced down and Rachael recognised those sharp green eyes; it was her mother. Mrs. Lupin looked over to a balding man wearing a white lab jacket. Who was he?

"Well, Mrs. Lupin," the man said. "We don't know what happened. All we can go by is what your husband told us, and it isn't very helpful." What were they talking about?

Then Rachael noticed there was a bed next to her, with someone in it. She leaned forward to get a better look. It was a sleeping Remus. It was odd though, there was such a peaceful air about him. It was one that she had never seen before in her life, except when she visited her grandmother on her deathbed. This set her thinking.

Was Remus... _dead_? No, he could not be... after all... what could possibly kill him? Then she remembered the wolf. The wolf was chasing them; did it ever leave them alone? Rachael looked around to see where she was. She was a white room with one bed, the one Remus was in. There were some potted plants, two doors at opposite walls of each other, the man, and her mother.

"Well, can't you run some tests or anything?" her mother said anxiously. The man nodded and that was when Rachael realised he was scribbling on a clipboard. What was this place? What tests was her mother talking about?

"Well, yes, we can, but it'd be much easier if one of your children to tell us what happened," the man said, still writing on the clipboard.

Her mother looked at Remus and then at Rachael. She smiled upon seeing her daughter fully awake. She walked over and knelt down next to the chair Rachael was sitting in. "Rachael, sweetie," she said in a calm, but urgent, voice. "Can you tell us what happened?"

"What d'you mean?" Rachael asked. _She_ even didn't know what happened. Her mother looked at her, puzzled, disbelieving. Her mouth was twitching slightly in the corners, a definite warning sign. She didn't believe her daughter and, frankly, Rachael had expected it from the moment her mother asked her that question. Undoubtedly, Mrs. Lupin loved her daughter very much; she had always seemed to favour Remus more, probably because he was the youngest by ten minutes.

"Rachael," her mother said, her voice getting tenser. "You were with your brother when this happened! What happened to him?"

Rachael flinched as Mrs. Lupin yelled sharply in her ears. Why didn't her mother believe her? _She_ didn't know what happened. Why would she? She didn't even know why she didn't know.

"Mum, I said I don't know!"

"Don't you lie to me!" she yelled, startling the man and Rachael. There was now an intense fire in her mother's eyes, one that Rachael had never seen before. "What happened to my son?"

They heard stirring from behind them, Remus was awake. They turned around to see that he was sitting up and rubbing his temple. Rachael could just see the tiniest bandage covering one part of his forehead and it was soaked in blood.

"I'll tell you," he said quietly.


	3. Forced To

Chapter Three  
Forced To

Their mother shrieked and ran over, sobbing hysterically to see her son awake and, hopefully, well. She pulled him into a hug and told him that he didn't have to tell anyone what happened, his sister would.

"But she doesn't know," Remus argued, his voice muffled from his mother's hug. When she finally released him, she got up and sat down on a spare chair. She nodded for Remus to talk. "Okay, so we were walking in the forest trying to get home from the store and a werewolf had been following us for a long time. It found us and chased us and, well... it bit me."

His mother's eyes widened, as well as Rachael's. She had only known of the werewolf's presence, not that it had bitten Remus. She leaned back in her seat and sighed. She could have stopped this, but she didn't. Remus continued unraveling the tale, even though he had said everything that needed to be said. A werewolf had bit him and that was all there was to it. He said that (after his mother had asked him angrily why his sister hadn't helped him) Rachael had run into a tree yelling for him to run.

Mrs. Lupin shot a cold glare at Rachael, who had become highly occupied with the full-length mirror across the room from her. She had only just noticed it and saw that her reflection showed that she had two large black eyes; her nose was crooked and covered in dried blood. She must have run into the tree hard.

"Rachael Michelle Lupin!" her mother shrieked.

Rachael jumped in fright and turned quickly to look at her, which she suddenly realised she shouldn't have done. Her mother's eyes were bulging at an unnatural bulge, they were red with flames. Her skin was flushed with fury, hands on her hips, hunched over. She stalked over to her daughter, bent down so that she was level and glared Rachael in the eye.

She tried to defend herself. "But, Mum," she whimpered, cowering under her mother's rage.

"Y-y-you l-let y-your brother get bitten by a werewolf!" she yelled, spraying her daughter with spit.

"But I-"

"But you what? You were too clumsy... too foolish... too... too... you _let_ your brother get bitten. Do you know what you've done to him?" Rachael didn't move. "Do you?"

Rachael slowly nodded, close to crying. Why was her mother yelling at her like this? It wasn't like she had meant for it to happen. She didn't even want to go into the forest, it was Remus's idea. He had suggested it, not her. And here was her mother, yelling at her as though the entire thing was her fault.

So let's backtrack a bit, their mother loved Rachael, but she had always loved Remus more. Rachael was her dad's favourite and, speaking of him, where did he get to?

The door to the room opened and in walked a sandy-haired, tall, lean, green-eyed man, Mr. Gregory Lupin. He adjusted the glasses framing his eyes, went over to his wife, pecked her on the cheek, and turned to the other man in the room.

"Sorry, Dr. Griemer," he said politely. "I would've been up here sooner but they make a lot of forms to fill out here." He gave a short laugh, trying to lighten the atmosphere. He looked around the room and saw his wife still glaring menacingly at his daughter and Remus sitting in the hospital bed. He didn't seem to know what to do.

"Greg," Mrs. Lupin said quietly. He looked over and she gestured for him to follow her. Mr. Lupin accompanied her over to a corner of the room and Dr. Griemer excused himself from the room.

Rachael moved her chair over towards her brother. He had lain back on his bed with his eyes shut. The hair covering his forehead had been brushed back and revealed his bandage, covering the spot where the wolf had bitten him. She couldn't help but wonder if her mother had been right, that she could have done something, but didn't. Maybe she _had _been too clumsy and too foolish.

_Wait_, she thought. _No, I told Remus to run; I kept looking back for him telling him to run._

_Yes, you did_, said a little voice in the back of her head. _But was it good enough_?

She hadn't thought of that.

_Of course it was._

_If you were a real sister you would've run back and gotten him._

_But he told me to run._

_And you listened? Wow, you're thicker than I thought._

_No I'm not!_

_Rachael you are..._ "Rachael... Rachael."

She snapped back to reality and saw her dad kneeling next to her. He looked at her with pity, sadness and worry. What was going on? She looked and saw that her mother was eyeing the back of her dad's head with an expectant look. What had she planned? Her dad took a long, hard sigh as though he were about to do something that he didn't want to do which, in her case, he was.

"I didn't want to do this," he said quietly, his voice cracking. "But I had to... well... I was forced to."


	4. Pain and Suffering

**Chapter Three  
****Pain and Suffering  
**_**- He gave one last, long, heartfelt cry and all went black. -**_

Rachael sat in her small room at the top of the Lupin household, lying back on her soft bed, looking at the ceiling, trying to forget, though it was near impossible to. How could it be that a person's life could be so normal, so uneventful, so _calm_, and then in a split second, in the blink of an eye, it changes right before you and there's nothing you can do about it. It didn't make sense to her, nothing did anymore. The whole world was just too confusing for her and she never wanted to face any of these problems again, but she had to. She was forced to. They were making her, well, _technically_, only one was. The other was thrown into it.

Rachael sat up and wiped her eyes clean, wincing from the pain of her swollen eyes. The Healer, Griemer, had fixed her broken nose and cleaned up the blood for her, but he never got the chance to cure her black eyes. Her mother had dragged him away and made him pay attention to Remus. She looked around at her small, dimly lit room. When she and Remus were six they had broken the light fixture on the ceiling, making the light shine only faintly. Her room was cramped with her bed, a dresser, a full-length mirror on the wall, a large bookshelf and a toy box in the corner under the single window, which let in the barest amount of light. She stood up and walked over to her toy box, kneeling down beside it.

She flipped the rusted, golden latches and lifted the box slowly. She pushed aside old dolls, little toy cars, a few odds and ends of toys she and her brother had broken in the past few years (she and her brother had a terrible habit of breaking things). She found at the bottom a small stuffed wolf. It was black with yellow piercing eyes, but with a friendly smile. There no fangs baring any spit in the corners of its mouth. This was a friendly wolf. Why couldn't the wolf they encountered in the forest be like this one? Then, she wouldn't be in the situation she was in and Remus wouldn't be locked in his room at this very moment, waiting, nervous, fearing the worst.

"Rachael, get down here!" Mrs. Lupin's voice shrieked, bouncing off the walls of the room.

Rachael placed the wolf back in the box, and went downstairs to face her mother, dreading every step she took that brought her closer to the downstairs. She got down and saw her mum and dad sitting at the kitchen table. Her father was holding a copy of _The Daily Prophet_ and her mother held a mug of coffee.

"Sit," Mrs. Lupin instructed, her lips barely moving and yet her voice projecting throughout the entire room.

Rachael did as she was told, afraid to do otherwise. "What'd I do?" she asked immediately, not even bothering to ask what they wanted or if she had done anything. She knew she had, she just didn't know what.

"It's not what you did," her mother said. Rachael's eyes brightened in surprise. "It's what I want you to do. In a few minutes Remus will be facing his transformation, and I want you to sit there and listen! I want you to tell me how horrible it was. I want you to tell me that it was terrible to listen to, that it made Remus miserable! Then you'll understand why you're getting the punishment you're getting!" Rachael sat there and didn't move. "Go!"

Rachael stood up very slowly, but ran up the steps and stopped in the middle of the hallway, in front of Remus's door. She shrunk down against the door and leaned her head back to let it rest against the doorknob. She didn't want to hear it. She knew it would be the worst thing she ever heard in her life and the worst pain Remus ever felt in his life. Oh how she wished this had never happened. She hoped with every ounce in her body that she would wake up in her bed and find out that this had all been some crazy dream. She and Remus had never been in that forest and had never woken up in St. Mungo's Wizard Hospital.

She sat there for ten minutes before she heard it - a low, painful gurgling sound coming from her brother's room. Remus moaned in pain.

* * *

Remus had been standing by the window of his room, leaning against the sill, looking out at the sky, waiting for the full moon to come, waiting for the worst. He was nervous. He had never been so nervous in his life, not even when the village bully had threatened his humanity by dangling him off the docks down at the seaport. That was the time he thought he had the worst scare in his life. But he was wrong, this was.

He walked over to the door, thinking about getting something quick to eat, but quickly dismissed the thought; he knew it wouldn't stay in his stomach anyway. He crossed back to the window and saw it, the full moon, golden, shining, and casting a beautiful glow in the night sky. How could something so beautiful cause him so much pain? He hadn't had time to broad on that because then it hit. A pain like a knife pierced through his stomach. He moaned in agony, a low gurgling sound emitting from him. He lurched forward on all fours. Sweat beading on his forehead, breathing fast and heavily, crying out, he tried to stay focused. His room was dissolving around him. Pain surged through his arms and legs and fingers and toes. His head felt as though it might split in two. His mind was reeling, the pain was too much. He cried out, hoping someone might come and help him, but he knew that would never happen.

He gave one last, long, heartfelt cry and all went black.

* * *

Rachael sat frozen at the doorway, listening to the sounds and cries of pain coming from behind her. Words couldn't describe how scared she felt. She just knew she never wanted to hear anything like that again, for the rest of her life and beyond that. All was quiet in Remus's room, not a sound, nothing. But wait, she heard something. It was a low growling, exactly like the one she heard in the forest. It happened… he was a werewolf.

She could hear the claws of his paws tapping on the wooden floor as the growling persisted. She heard the wolf coming closer to the door and then there was scratching on the door, whining. She turned around and tried to peek through the keyhole, but she couldn't see anything.

She heard footsteps coming up the stairs and leaned forward to see who it was.

"Come on." It was her dad. He stopped in front of her and knelt down. "T-there's no point listening. You should just go to bed. Remember… tomorrow." He broke off, tears filling his eyes. He turned away for a moment then looked back at his daughter, trying to control himself. "Just - just go to bed."


	5. Tears and Sadness

Chapter Five

Chapter Five  
Tears and Sadness

Rachael awoke the morning feeling more tired than she had been when she went to bed the night before, probably because she was dreading what was going to happen. She leaned over the foot of her bed and saw a large trunk next to her bed; they were really going to do it. She went to get dressed into her red jumper and black pants. She hurried down to the kitchen after and saw her mum and dad sitting there. Her mother glared as she walked in and her father couldn't bear to look at his daughter.

Rachael sat down across from her dad. "Where's Remus?" she asked.

"Sleeping," her mother snapped. "Because of you, he's in too much pain to get up!"

"I didn't do anything!"

"Oh, just shut up and get your trunk!"

Rachael stood up and slammed her chair into the table. Her mother snapped at her again, but Rachael was already up the stairs. She stopped in front of her brother's door. She opened the door cautiously, making sure it didn't creak.

Remus was lying on his back, eyes closed, one hand behind his head and the other lying on his stomach. His face was pale, dark circles under his eyes, his arms and face were cut up, and bloodstains were on his face. Rachael couldn't look at him; it caused her too much pain. She turned to close the door.

"Rachael?"

She looked back in the room, Remus was up. "Yeah?" she answered.

"What's going on?"

Rachael forgot that Remus didn't know what was happening. How could she tell him? No, she wouldn't. Remus couldn't take much more disappointment and pain.

"Nothing," she answered quickly.

"Something's happening. What're they doing?"

"Look, its nothing, Remus!" She yelled loudly at him. She seemed to scare him by her sudden anger, but she didn't care. Everything was going wrong, everything. She slammed the door, only to be scolded by her mother who was walking by, and ran into her room. She grabbed her trunk and brought it downstairs.

Her dad was waiting for her there; he still would not look at his daughter. "Aren't you going to say goodbye to your brother?" he said, voice chocked up.

Rachael didn't want her dad to know that she had yelled at Remus, especially when he was in the condition he was in. "I already did," she lied.

He nodded and they went out the door.

* * *

"Mum, what's going on?" Remus asked as his mother bustled about his room, helping him pick up his torn books and broken toys. He had broken them the night before as a werewolf.

"What d'you mean?" she said quickly, even though she knew quite well what Remus was referring to. "Your sister is going somewhere with your father, they'll be back soon."

Remus nodded as he picked up some of his Legos. He could see teeth marks carved into them. They were useless now; he couldn't build anything with them so he tossed them into the trashcan. He picked up a book on the floor; it was one of his favourites, a Muggle book but a good one nonetheless. I Am the Cheese by Robert Cormier. It was very advanced for his age, but Remus understood every word, every page, everything. He felt that he could relate to it now; he stood alone.

The book was useless now, all the pages were torn. There was no point in keeping this either; he'd just buy another copy. Nothing could repair that, not even magic. Remus looked at his mother. He knew she was lying; everyone seemed to be lying to him, Rachael and his mother. They both said that nothing was wrong. But something _was_ wrong and no one would tell him. Why wouldn't they? Did they think he couldn't handle it? He didn't know and he didn't want to know. He threw his torn jumper in the trash bin and went outside.

* * *

Remus sat under the giant oak tree in front of his house, his favourite spot. He looked up at the branches and saw the wooden planks still there, the tree house he and his sister were building. They never got to finish it. The weather had been bad and, besides, they ran out of wood and nails. He looked out into the distance and saw someone approaching him. It was a tall, portly figure with a pig like face, beady, green eyes, big nose and a small mouth. It was Phillip Runsdown, the village bully. He saw Remus and smiled, revealing his yellowing teeth.

"Hey, Lupin!" he snarled, walking at a quicker pace. Remus could almost swear he felt a tremor in the Earth. Remus didn't answer, he merely glared at Phillip. "Hey, Lupin, you deaf or something? Answer me!" Still Remus did not answer; he wouldn't play into this kid's fairly large hands. "Lupin, you're asking for it!

"No I'm not," Remus said at last.

"Oh, you think you're cool?"

"No."

"Ha, thought so. So, where's your ratty little sister? I need someone to humiliate, you're getting old."

Remus felt a surge of anger, but he wouldn't let it show. "She's not here," he said, fighting to stay calm.

"Figures, stupid kid knows what's good for her after all."

Remus had had it. He stood up abruptly and stuck his face right in Phillip's. "Shut up! You don't know what you're talking about!"

Phillip laughed mercilessly. "You don't sound like you do!"

_He's right_, Remus thought, _I don't_. But he wouldn't let that get in the way. "Don't you have anything better to do? The people at the zoo are looking for a new elephant. They're holding auditions; you should go there and get the job."

"W-w-why you-" Phillip threw his fist back and was ready to strike Remus when,

"Phillip Runsdown, if you dare touch my son…!" Remus saw his dad approaching from behind Phillip. He stopped right in front of them and grabbed Phillip by the collar. "If you touch my son you'll wish you were never born." Cowering under Mr. Lupin's furious glare, Phillip ran down towards the docks. "You okay, Remus?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine. Where'd you go?"

"Your mother didn't tell you, did she?" Remus shook his head. "Sit down." Remus sat down with his father and they leaned against the tree trunk. "You know your mother wasn't happy with your sister. She thinks this is all her fault - yes I know she didn't know anything had happened - but your mother was still angry at her. She doesn't consider Rachael her daughter anymore. Remus, your sister isn't going to be living with us anymore."

"But… but where's she living?"

"In an orphanage. She's no longer a member of the Lupin family; your mother's disowned her. I tried to stop her, but it didn't work. We're not allowed to see her, talk to her, owl her… anything."

"But… but, Dad… she's my sister… my twin."

"I know, Remus, I know." He pulled Remus into a hug and they both cried… thinking… would they ever see Rachael Lupin again?


	6. New Home

Chapter Six

Chapter Six  
New Home

They drove up to a three-story building. It was white, but the paint was chipping. There were three rows of three windows from the front and a large wooden door in the front with a golden doorknocker. Mr. Lupin and Rachael got out of the car, took Rachael's trunk and went up to the front, where a skinny, strict-looking woman was waiting for them. The two walked up to the woman.

She looked down at Rachael and scrunched her nose in dislike. "Yes you must be the – err - Lupins," she said in a harsh, cold voice. "Well, come on, girl!" Mr. Lupin gripped his daughter's shoulders. "I mean, walk this way, Rachael."

Rachael looked up at her father. Wasn't she going to get a chance to say goodbye?

Her father gripped her shoulders tighter. "Bye, Rachael," he said quietly. He released her and went back to the car.

Trying hard not to cry, Rachael followed the woman into the building. Inside the building, there was a long, pale blue hallway, pictures hanging up, plants hung on the walls or in corners. The hallway led into a sort of common room with a small group of teenagers sitting in the corner playing a card game. They looked up at Rachael and the woman when they walked in.

"Good morning, children," the woman said with a false sweet voice.

"Good morning, Mrs. Ramben," they answered in a pleasant, but mocking, voice.

Apparently Mrs. Ramben didn't notice this because she walked past them over to a medium size woman with grey hair and brown eyes. Mrs. Ramben told Rachael that this woman would be her personal instructor; her name was Ms. Marshall. She looked like a kind old woman, but that was only on the outside. She had never been anyone's personal instructor, but everyone in the orphanage knew that this was one person you did not want to get to know. Two of the teenagers who were playing cards in the common room were walking past them and one of them hissed in Rachael's ear, "I pity you, kid."

Rachael wondered if this woman was really that bad, but she didn't have time to brood on that because Ms. Marshall instructed her to follow her. They went down a long blue hallway, up a flight of stairs and down another corridor. This hall had many rows of doors with golden numbers on them. They stopped in front of Room 35. Ms. Marshall pulled a silver key ring out of her pocket, shifted through the three keys, selected one in the middle and unlocked the door.

Inside was a yellow room, _very_ yellow, with bunk beds against the right wall, a small nightstand next to it, a large closet and a small television set. Rachael walked into the room and was about to put her trunk on the bottom bunk when,

"No! Don't do that!" Ms. Marshall yelled. "That is _not_ your bunk! That's your roommate... oh, what was her name...? Oh, yes, Becky. Now listen up, kid! No one, I repeat, _no one_ in this orphanage has a personal instructor. It was just a cover so we can get you where you're supposed to be." Rachael looked at her, utterly confused. "Oh _school_, of course! When you get your letter you will come with me to Diagon Alley and I will escort you to Platform 9 ¾, and you will come back here every summer, got it?"

Rachael nodded slowly, she had completely forgotten about school. What with all this going on, how could she remember? Ms. Marshall left the room and Rachael began unpacking. She took out her clothes; she hadn't brought that many, only three jumpers, two pairs of jeans, socks, all that stuff. She brought some books to read, her black jacket, and that was it. She picked up her clothes and began looking for a place to put them. She knelt down beside the nightstand and opened the drawer; it was full to bursting with clothes. She went over to the closet and saw that it was also full of clothes and no hangers left for Rachael to even attempt to squeeze hers in. _How could a girl living in an orphanage have so many clothes? _she thought, staring at the closet in utter amazement. Rachael had been told to leave nearly all of her belongings home.

She sighed and threw her clothes back in her trunk. Where was she going to put her trunk? She picked it up and standing on her tiptoes she pushed it onto her bunk. She wanted to go explore the rest of the orphanage, but decided to wait so she could meet her roommate. It was only a minute later before the door to the room opened and a blonde-haired, blue-eyed girl stepped in. She seemed to be in a hurry because she ran over to her bed, ducked under it, pulled something out and was about to dash out the door again before she noticed Rachael standing there. At first it looked as though she couldn't figure out who Rachael was, but then comprehension dawned upon her.

"Oh," she said, her voice full of disgust. "You must be my new..._ roommate_." Rachael nodded. "Well, I'm Becky Beckham. You are?"

"Oh, um... Rachael Lupin," Rachael answered sheepishly.

Becky made a face of disgust at the name. _What's her problem?_ Rachael thought, looking at Becky for a sign of welcome. _Does she think my name's funny?_

"Well... err... _Rachael_." She let Rachael roll off her tongue in such an annoying way that it made Rachael's stomach clench. "Let's get a couple of things straight." _Rules already?_ "Rule number one: never touch my stuff; I don't care how much you need it. Rule number two: when my friends are in this room, you won't be. Rule three: I didn't ask for a roommate, they just needed a room quickly, so do not, I repeat, do _not_ talk to me!" Becky went out the door and came back a second later. "Wait a minute; I'm forgetting one of my own rules. My friends are coming in here... out!"

Feeling more than willing to get of the room and away from Becky, Rachael dashed out of the room and into the common room where she watched the group of teenagers play "Spit." She sat down in the grey couch and watched lazily. She was here no more than an hour and she hated the place. That Ms. Marshall was horrible to her and she was stuck with a snob for a roommate. Could life get any worse?


	7. Mail Call

Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven  
Mail Call  
3 Years Later

"Hey, Lupin, get up and get out!" _Not again... just five more minutes._ "Lupin, are you deaf? Get out! My friends will be here any minute! I don't want them seeing_ you_!"

10-year-old Rachael Lupin groggily raised herself off her bed, disrupted from her dreams, awoken by the most unpleasant voice on the planet. She rolled onto her stomach and saw her roommate, Becky, staring up at her.

"What time is it?" Rachael asked, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"11:30, so get up and get out. Go get lunch or something! I don't want you around!"

"Hey, it's my room too you know!"

"Just get out!"

Rachael groaned, jumped off her bunk, went over to the closet, grabbed her nearest pair of clothes and went to the bathroom to change. When she emerged, she left to go to the cafeteria. She found the cafeteria half full of kids from the orphanage; she looked around for an empty table and saw one right next to the kitchens. She went to get her lunch (a bologna sandwich, a bag of chips and chocolate milk) and began to eat. She looked around at everyone else. For the three years she had been at the orphanage, she had classified all of them into groups.

The group sitting at the table next to her, they were the oldest there, and the nicest. The group was rather small, only four of them. The first and oldest was Kathleen McDonald; she was a pretty blonde girl with deep blue eyes, pearly white teeth and a beautiful smile. All the boys, young or old, always tried to get at least one chance to talk to her. One time Rachael was being picked on by her roommate's friends and Kathleen came over and told them off. Next in the group was Greg Lawrence. Rachael liked him because he reminded her so much of her father, he even looked like him and had the same name. He had sandy hair, and green eyes; the only difference was he didn't wear glasses. He was the one who kept all the younger boys in line.

Then there was Brittany Becker. She was just a plain brunet, brown eyes, but a personality of gold, she always knew the right thing to say. Last there was Adam Finch; he had the same blue eyes and blonde hair that Kathleen had. These four were the ones who felt really bad for Rachael. Rachael was the one who got picked on because she had the most original reason for being in the orphanage. No one there had ever been disowned, it was only Rachael. The four of them waved to Rachael when they saw her sitting there, she waved back.

She turned her attention towards the table in the very back, which was the "geeks" - George Brandy, Michael Fitzgerald, Ella Bryans and Bill Bones. They were all right, although they didn't like to mix with anyone who wasn't in their category. Then there were the average kids, which consisted of everyone, except four others. One was Rachael, but she didn't fit in with any group.

Then there was Becky Beckham, Brandy Culkin, and Brenda Lewis - The Three B's, as Rachael liked to call them. They thought they were brilliant, beautiful and better than everyone else. They gloried in picking on anyone younger than them or anyone they considered to be "lower" than them. They even got caught picking on some of the older kids. But mostly they loved picking on Rachael, for no reason. For the three years she had been at the orphanage, they had caused her nothing but pain and misery. The first week there, Becky and Rachael got into a, well, let's say fight? No too civilised a word for it, _brawl_ is more like it. Rachael had stayed in the room when Becky's friends were there, so Becky told her to leave. Rachael, of course, refused to; it had only been a week since she had been there and Becky was already her arch enemy. So, Becky was in a particularly bad mood that day and didn't take it that well. First it was just exchanging a few calm words, then foul words, and before anyone could do anything they were beating each other up. Rachael had to admit that Becky was very tough when it came to fighting, her injuries proved it.

They were both sent to Mrs. Ramben's office, where she took no mercy on them. She had the two cleaning blackboards in the classrooms, polishing the banister in the common room and cleaning every room in the entire orphanage. After they were dealt their punishment they were sent to the infirmary. Rachael had a new black eye, as the one from running into a tree had vanished, a cut lip and she could hardly move her jaw. All Becky suffered from was a bloody nose, but Rachael was happy just to see her whine in pain. Then again, Becky didn't have to suffer with what Rachael did - Ms. Marshall. She got such a lecture she nearly had to staple her eyelids open, for all she knew she might have fallen asleep with her eyes open and didn't realise it.

Rachael was brought back to reality by a large splattering sound and the cry of, "food fight!" She turned wildly around to see who started it and, much to her surprise, it was Bill Bones, scary thought. Ducking under all the flying food, dodging a banana peel that flew overhead and nearly tripping on a fruit salad, she ran towards the exit and bumped into Ms. Marshall. Ms. Marshall was looking down at her with stern eyes and immediately Rachael thought she did something.

"Whatever it is, I didn't do it!" she blurted out.

"No you didn't do anything...yet. Come with me to the mail room."

Puzzled, Rachael trudged behind her personal instructor to the mailroom. This was strange; she never got mail. Who would want to mail her anyway? The people at the orphanage almost made it a rule not to let her get mail, but were forced out of it because of the one special letter she would be getting. She walked up a short flight of stairs, turned right down a corridor.

Rachael let her thoughts drift to her birthday - August 31st, a mere four weeks away. She thought of the best birthday she had. It was the year before she and Remus got into the accident in the forest, the year she had turned seven. She and Remus were taken out of the house for the day and went to a movie with their dad, which was a real surprise because their kind never went to the movies, normally. When they got back to the house it was decorated from top to bottom with birthday decorations. Balloons, confetti, everything imaginable and there was a giant banner hanging from the wall in the living room that read _Happy 7__th__ Birthday Rachael and Remus!_ As a special treat the twins were taken to Hogsmeade, where they found an open field and got to fly on a broomstick for the first time in their lives.

Last year, well, it hadn't been a pleasant at all. There was a thunderstorm raging outside - thunder crashing, lightening flashing. The giant oak tree in the courtyard behind the orphanage had even fallen down, knocked down a telephone pole, and nearly started a fire. Thankfully the rain was falling too hard for a fire to start. But, unfortunately, they were in darkness for the whole day. Now, Rachael isn't completely superstitious, but she gets frightened very easily. So they were using candles for light (Rachael would've preferred if she had a wand and lit it up) and Becky and her two friends decided to have a little fun scaring the life out of Rachael. They put together this elaborate plan where they wrote in red paint over her bed _Rachael they're coming to get you_ which scared her a little. Then they made a shadow figure the size of a full grown man creep up to her, they added stomping feet, moans for the effect, and Becky let off a high pitched shriek. Rachael jumped off her bed and dashed out of the room.

The worst thing was that the girls didn't even get a scolding; just Rachael because she crashed into the banister leading to the second floor and almost knocked it over. She could have gotten away with it but, to her misfortune, Michael Fitzgerald was in the room at the time and caught her. In result, Rachael spent the entire next day writing on the blackboard _I will not cause destruction_ one hundred times.

As Rachael was walking down the hall she looked in some of the rooms, watching the students who had summer school. She pitied them; it was ninety degrees out and they purposely made the classrooms without air conditioning. Ms. Marshall brought Rachael into the mailroom. The mailroom was a small room cluttered with file cabinets filled with mail the orphanage gets... such as applications for new kids that were being brought in and their bills and such. No one ever got any mail, except Rachael. She saw a small tawny barn owl perched on the windowsill that looking at her with big yellow eyes. There was a parchment envelope clutched in its beak. Rachael rushed over, took the letter, petted the owl for bringing her letter and tore it open. The letter said:

_Dear Ms. R. Lupin,  
__Congratulations, you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please note that the term begins on September 1st. The train will be leaving at 11:00 from Platform Nine and Three Quarters at Kings Cross Station. Enclosed is a list of the supplies you will need for the coming year.  
__See you on September 1st  
__Minerva McGonagall  
__Deputy Headmistress._

"Come on!" Ms. Marshall said suddenly. Rachael looked up from the letter. "We are going to Diagon Alley today, so come on!"


	8. Down in Diagon

Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight  
Down In Diagon

"So, how do we get in?" Rachael asked. She and Ms. Marshall were faced with a seemingly solid brick wall. Ms. Marshall didn't say anything; she just withdrew her wand from her pocket and tapped the third brick from the left above the trash can. Immediately all the bricks began shuffling up, down, left, right and soon they were standing in front of a crowded alley. Rachael and Ms. Marshall stepped inside and headed down the long alley towards a crooked marble building, Gringotts Wizard Bank.

Rachael looked around, observing all of the different stores. She saw an owl emporium with the most adorable brown owl with black specks. If she had enough money, she definitely wanted to buy that owl. She looked further ahead and saw more shops like Flourish and Blotts, Madam Malkin's Robes for all Occasions, Magical Menagerie, Ollivander's, and many others. Of course, she couldn't go in them yet, she needed her money. Rachael looked at all the witches and wizards combing through the street, she hoped to find someone her age and going into her year. She saw some who seemed to be her age. There was a girl with auburn hair and dark green eyes, she looked friendly, but didn't seem to know where she was going. _Muggle-born probably,_ Rachael thought. _Wish I could help._ But she couldn't because Ms. Marshall was now dragging her up the steps and into Gringotts.

They walked in and saw rows of desks with greedy, evil looking goblins sitting at them. Some were stamping envelopes, others sealing them. They went up to the front desk. The goblin looked down on them with black beady eyes.

"Can I help you?" it asked, its voice full of malice.

Rachael flinched as it spoke, but Ms. Marshall seemed to be unaffected.

"Yes," she answered politely. _There's a switch,_ Rachael thought bitterly. "Ms. Rachael Lupin would like to retrieve some gold from her vault. Oh, yes." She stuck a hand in her coat pocket and pulled out a silver key. "Here's her key."

The goblin took the key and inspected it closely, as though trying to detect a forgery. He ordered a goblin named Griphook to come over and take them down to the vaults. They followed the goblin through a giant door and found themselves sitting in a small mine cart, going down a twisting track. They passed several torch lit corridors that led to different vaults. They stopped in front of Vault 345. Griphook took the lantern out along with the key and opened the vault. The door shifted open revealing a rather large amount of gold galleons, silver sickles and bronze knuts.

* * *

Rachael and Ms. Marshall exited Gringotts with a large sack of gold for her books, a cauldron, robes, potion supplies, and a wand. They entered Flourish and Blotts to find it oddly empty. They soon found out why, it stunk in there. The owner rushed over and apologised for the smell. It seemed a boy had let off a pack of Dung Bombs and they had to evacuate the building while he got the smell out. Much to Rachael's surprise, the owner gave her all her books for free just for being brave enough to go in there with the smell still lively in the air. _Good_, Rachael thought. _Now I might have enough money to get that owl!_

They were then off to the Apothecary to get potion supplies, then to the wand shop. Rachael's wand was Phoenix Feather, Maple and 7 ½ inches. Emerging from Ollivander's Wand Shop, Ms. Marshall excused herself for a while, while Rachael went to get her robes. She entered the robe shop and saw the girl she had seen before, standing on a stool. Apparently she was waiting to get her robes. Madam Malkin rushed over and told Rachael to stand on a stool while she attended to the other young lady. Rachael did as she was told.

"Hi," the girl said.

"Hi," Rachael answered.

"I'm Lily Evans, who're you?" she said, holding out her hand.

"Rachael Lupin," Rachael answered, shaking Lily's hand.

"So, is your family all wizards?"

"Well, most of us. You're Muggle-born right?"

"Muggle-born?"

"You're a witch with non-magic parents."

"Oh, well, yes I am." Just then Madam Malkin walked in with Lily's robes and she was off. "See you at Hogwarts!"

"Yeah, see you."

* * *

"Do you _need_ to get an owl?" Ms. Marshall complained as Rachael ran into the emporium; the owl she wanted still there.

"Yes I do!" Rachael called back through the open window of the shop. Ms. Marshall shook her head in disgust and waited in front of the shop. Despite her being a witch (both at heart and in being) she hated owls, which made the reason for buying one more appealing to Rachael. Rachael looked over to where the owl was sitting; it was hooting and flexing its wings out. It was the best out of all of them, but probably most expensive. _No matter_, she thought. She looked into her moneybag; she still had a lot of gold left to buy it.

She approached the owl and petted its head. The owl turned around and began hooting loudly. Rachael jumped back, thinking she had done something wrong, and jumped right into Mr. Eeylop himself. He was a middle-aged man, tall, black hair, mustache, and square glasses. He was looking a bit anxious at the moments, probably trying to see what the commotion had been.

"I'm sorry sir… I-" Rachael began but, to her surprise, he was smiling.

"Don't be sorry, that means she likes you," he answered, striding over to the owl and stroking its back, the owl hooting even louder than it had when Rachael was near it. "She goes deathly quiet when she's near someone she doesn't like." He looked out the window, assumingly checking to see if anyone else was coming to the store. Rachael looked around at the empty store; business was going quite slow apparently. "Now, what can I help you with?"

"Oh, yes, I would like to buy that-" but the door opened and Mr. Eeylop was now bustling over to see who it was. It was a woman with her son, Rachael's age, she assumed. The boy had pitch-black hair that stuck out in all directions imaginable, hazel eyes and glasses.

"Oh, Mrs. Potter!" Mr. Eeylop said, his eyes bright. "How have you been?"

"Busy, we've been up and down the alley twice, making sure we have all James's items for school. You remember James, of course? My son?"

"Of course I do. Hullo James."

"Hi," the boy named James said quietly. James walked off to look at the owls. He stopped in front of a snowy white one. "This one's nice," he muttered, just loud enough for Rachael to hear. She went back to the owl she favoured and, yet again, it started screeching uncontrollably. She jumped back and grinned sheepishly as Mr. Eeylop and Mrs. Potter looked at her. She stepped away from it and pretended to be occupied with another owl.

"That owl doesn't seem to like you very much, does it?" James had walked over to her and was looking from her to the owl.

"No, it does," Rachael said, looking up at James. "Mr. Eeylop says that means she likes me." James smiled. He walked over and the owl went "deathly quiet" as Mr. Eeylop said. "That means she doesn't like you."

James walked away from the owl. "Oh," he said shortly. "Well, I liked the other owl better anyway." Apparently he felt embarrassed that an owl didn't like him. He walked over to his mum, said something, and they went over to the owl James had been looking at before and Mr. Eeylop gave it to them. They left the shop. James waved at Rachael, and she waved back.

Mr. Eeylop finally remembered that she was there.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said apologetically, bustling back over to her. "Mrs. Potter, an old friend of mine from school." Rachael nodded. "So, have you found anything you'd like to buy?"

"Yes, the owl over there." She pointed to the loud owl. If she got it she'd have to break it of that habit. Mr. Eeylop nodded. He went out of the room to get a cage, put the owl into the cage and handed it to Rachael when she collected her money. She paid ten galleons for the owl and left to go get Ms. Marshall. On the way home she noticed her owl was quiet. _Smart owl_, she thought.

* * *

Rachael was now sitting on her bed, upright, leaning against the wall, stroking her owl as it perched itself on her shoulder. She had spent the past few hours telling it over and over that it had to be quiet. When they got back to the orphanage she drew a lot of strange looks from everyone with her owl and oddly shaped packages. She didn't care; she had her ticket to the next world, well_ her_ world, in those packages. She had decided to name the owl Emerald, because of his deep green eyes that reminded her so much of emeralds. The door to her room opened.

"Are you back yet?" Becky called.

"If you mean me," Rachael said coolly, "then yes I am."

"Oh, great. Where did you go anyway?"

"Out."

"Obviously, I mean _where_."

"Oh, um," what was she going to tell her? _Oh right, Becky, I just went to a place where Muggles can't see and got a cauldron, a wand… nothing unusual_. But she had an idea. "I went to look at a boarding school."

"Boarding school? You can't afford a boarding school."

"It's free. Besides, you should be happy. I won't be able to embarrass you if I'm at school for ten months."

"Yeah, I guess. Hey, what's that hooting sound?"

Rachael let Emerald fly down to Becky. She screeched out of the room yelling, "you weirdo!"


	9. Happy Birthday!

Chapter Nine  
Happy Birthday!

"Happy birthday to me… happy birthday to me." Rachael was sitting out in the courtyard behind the orphanage on one of the wooden benches. It was a bright sunny day, the last day of August. The sky was a clear blue, with white puffy clouds drifting lazily overhead. Every now and then a crow or sparrow would fly over head, and perch itself onto a tree branch. The courtyard was a peaceful place to be. It was small, but full of green grass with a circular walkway around and on the walkway were dozens of benches for everyone to sit on. In the centre of the yard was a giant oak tree, which, at the moment, was occupied with a group of five year olds as they played their childish games.

"Happy birthday to Rachael, happy birthday to me." She sighed and looked around. Another birthday had nearly passed, completely forgotten. Not that it surprised her. No one at the orphanage knew it was her birthday, except for the staff, but they didn't count. They didn't even like her very much. Not one kid there knew it was her birthday. She hadn't gotten so much as a, "so today's your birthday?" in three years. She wondered if her dad or Remus even remembered today was her birthday. Wait, they would have to because, after all, it was Remus's birthday too.

She got up, deciding to just head indoors. She walked unfocusedly in through the double doors and walked right into Kathleen McDonald.

"Oops," Rachael said, stepping back. "Sorry."

"It's alright," Kathleen answered, smiling pleasantly. "Actually, I was coming to look for you."

Rachael stared up at her, dumbfounded. True that Kathleen and her friends were nice to Rachael, they never really made an effort to talk to her. This was new. "Why?"

"You'll see, follow me." She led Rachael through the back door of the orphanage, up a short corridor, through the door that leads to the hall going to either the kitchens or the common room. They went through the left door, into the common room and what Rachael saw nearly made her faint with shock and surprise.

The entire common room was decked out in birthday decorations. Balloons of all colours were hovering in the air, there were streamers roped around the banisters, confetti was on the floor, glittering in the light. There was a red banner hung suspending from the ceiling and in golden letters were the words _Happy 11__th__ Birthday Rachael!_ Sitting on one of the couches were Greg Lawrence, Brittany Becker and Adam Finch. They were all smiling, pleased with Rachael's reaction. It was a birthday party... for her. She couldn't believe it; it had been so long since she had one. Besides, she had become so used to people neglecting her birthday.

She had such a wonderful time; she couldn't even remember having so much fun. Though she wasn't with anyone her own age, or her family, she couldn't help but just have a good time. They goofed around, played all these weird games where they had to act out something, charades basically, but they were allowed to talk. Rachael had to act like Freddy Kruger, so she ran up to her dormitory, stole into Becky's draw and took a whole bunch of her fake nails, taped them together into five long sticks and taped the bottom one to her fingers and used them as claws.

The only time they were interrupted was when Becky came in, crying hysterically that her fake nails were missing. Rachael quickly hid them under the couch while she and the others tried hard not to laugh, but to look as confused as possible. When Becky tore out of the room and began to rip apart the rest of the building, they all burst out laughing. Rachael ducked under the couch to retrieve the nails and put the on again and began sneaking behind Becky (who was looking through the utility closet, for some strange reason) and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Where did you find them!" she shrieked.

"Under the couch," Rachael said in her most innocent voice. "Looks like one of the little kids got to them." And she casually walked away.

The party only ended because they had an earlier curfew, as classes would be starting up soon and Rachael had to catch the eleven o'clock train the next day. She sat on her bed, pulling on her socks that night; she wasn't ready to go to bed, so she figured she'd just check her trunk to see if she had everything she needed. She had Emerald out of her cage and was letting her stretch her wings because she would be shut up in that cage for a long time the following day. The dormitory door opened and Becky walked in. She looked up at the owl and scowled in disgust.

"Why is that thing out?" she snarled.

"Because I want her out, and it's not a _thing,_ it's a _she_," Rachael grumbled.

Emerald swooped around Becky's head and she shrieked. The dormitory door opened again and Ms. Marshall came thundering in. She looked from Rachael to Becky with Emerald still circling around her head.

"Rachael Lupin!" Ms. Marshall boomed. "Put the owl in its cage if you can't control it." She bustled out of the room, slamming the door loudly.

Rachael groaned and coaxed her owl to come over. "Come on, Emerald. Are you inspecting the mean and nasty Becky?" Becky scowled as Emerald fluttered to Rachael and perched itself on her wrist. "Don't worry, she doesn't have fleas, she _is_ the flea. Oh, what's that? She reminds you of an owl pellet... me too. Bet she is one, small and smelly and brown and... Hey! We can cut her in half to see inside her. Bet it's all black, black heart, black lungs, black kidneys, black everything."

"Do you know how ridiculous you look talking to an owl?" Becky mocked.

"No, but I know how ridiculous you look."

"Lupin, you're asking for it!"

"I like asking for it. Now, I'll be out of your smelly hair in about an hour. I have everything I need? Yes I do. Good night!"


	10. Aboard the Hogwarts Express

Chapter Ten  
Aboard the Hogwarts Express

"Hurry, the train's leaving in fifteen minutes!"

"I'm coming... darn trolley... move!" Rachael went racing through the train station as Ms. Marshall jogged ahead of her, speeding towards Platform Nine and Three Quarters. It was ten forty five and, unless they hurried, they would miss the train. Rachael dodged a few people, and nearly ran Ms. Marshall over as they dashed through the barrier between Platforms Nine and Ten. They fell through on the other side of the platform to see a scarlet steam engine standing proudly before them, huffing and puffing clouds of smoke into the blue sky. There were dozens of students running about the platform saying goodbyes and loading their trunks in the train. Rachael went to put her trunk and owl in the train, said a rushed goodbye to Ms. Marshall and dashed off to find a compartment.

She walked down the train, peering through the compartment door windows, trying to find one. But all she found were full ones or ones with rather nasty looking students. Near the middle she found one with a single occupant, a rather familiar one, she couldn't place him. She slid the compartment door open and looked at the boy.

"Can I sit here?" she asked politely. The boy nodded. Rachael sat down across from him. She looked at the boy; he appeared very tired and sick. He had dark circles under his drooping eyes, his mouth was curved into a small frown as he gazed lazily out of the train and out onto the platform. Why did he look so familiar? She didn't think she had seen him before. She looked harder at him, feeling rather awkward, but luckily he didn't seem to notice her. She knew... it was!

"Remus!" she shouted happily.

Remus jerked his head up suddenly. For a moment it didn't look as though he knew who Rachael was. He was looking at her strangely, but then his eyes widened.

"Rachael!" he shouted, smiling, eyes sparkling.

"I can't believe it's you! Wow, I almost didn't recognise you."

Remus smiled. "Well I didn't even _know_ it was you. Three years... you haven't changed a bit!"

"Let's see if you have. Stand up, come on, stand up!" Feeling foolish, Remus stood up. Rachael stood next to him and moved her hand across her and Remus's head. It grazed the top of his hair. "No, you haven't either; we're still the same height." She gave a short laugh. Soon enough, she and Remus were talking as though they had never been separated, even though they were talking about the three years when they _were_ separated. Rachael was telling Remus all about her life in the orphanage and how she had to put up with Ms. Marshall, Becky and all Becky's friends. She went into detail about how they acted, doing accurate impressions of them that made Remus laugh hysterically.

She asked Remus why he looked so tired.

"Full moon last night," he answered, casting his eyes down towards the floor. Rachael squirmed uneasily in her seat. Remus looked up at her, knowing what she was thinking. "It's not your fault... just forget it ever happened." Rachael opened her mouth to protest but Remus wouldn't let her. "Just forget it."

Rachael nodded, although she knew she couldn't forget.

"So...err... how has Dad been?" she asked, trying to keep the conversation light. Remus began to look uncomfortable and immediately Rachael sensed something was wrong. "Is something wrong with him?"

"Well... uh... the day you left... Dad and Mum got into a fight and... Dad left the house. We haven't seen him for years," Remus explained, looking out the window. The train had started leaving. Rachael nodded. Dad had left, all because of her? She had caused everyone so much pain, especially Remus. She couldn't stand it. Why did her dad have to leave... and if he did, he could've come and got her. No, she was being selfish. But he probably would have, unless something went wrong... maybe.

"Hey, can we sit in here?" Two boys had appeared at the doorway. One was James from the owl emporium the other she had never seen before. He had light blue eyes and short black hair that fell elegantly into his eyes.

"Sure," Remus said.

The boy Rachael had never seen sat next to her brother and James sat down next to Rachael.

"Hey, I remember you," James said suddenly. "I saw you in Eeylops. I never did introduce myself, so might as well now. I'm James Potter. You two are?" He looked at Rachael and Remus.

"Rachael Lupin," Rachael answered.

"Remus Lupin," Remus said.

"I'm Sirius Black," the other boy said. "You two're brother and sister?"

"Yeah, we're twins," Rachael answered.

James and Sirius nodded.

"Cool," Sirius said. "I've never met twins before... but anyway... You guys know what house you want to be in?"

Rachael hadn't given this much thought. Of course, her being separated from her family gave her a jolt away from the magic circulation. Who on Earth could she discuss her house hopes with in the orphanage. Well, Gryffindor had always been appealing.

"I think I want to be in Gryffindor," Remus was saying. Remus would probably get in; he was brave, smart, and loyal. Gryffindor was one of the best houses. The headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, was in that house himself. She knew any house was better than Slytherin. If she got into Slytherin she'd hop on the train back home in a split second. Everyone said Hufflepuff was for dodders, people who weren't that great with magic, but it was a load of garbage. There were plenty of good Hufflepuffs. Ravenclaws were the brainy magic folk, so it wouldn't be too bad if she got into there.

"I hope I'm in Gryffindor," Sirius said. "I doubt it though; my entire family's been in Slytherin, now they expect me to get in."

"Why? What's the big deal if you're in Gryffindor?" Rachael asked, interested in what the reason might be.

Sirius sighed. "Because they hate Muggle-borns. We're purebloods, and they think I shouldn't mix with anyone from a Muggle family. Load of junk, if you ask me." He leaned back in his seat and looked around. "I assume we're all purebloods on here?"

Remus and Rachael shook their heads, while James nodded.

"We're half bloods," Remus explained.

"Ah, well, I won't tell her. Then I won't be scolded by Mummy Black. 'If I catch you becoming friends with Muggle-borns, half bloods, blood traitors, or anyone with tainted blood at all, you'll be joining the house elves on the wall!'" They all laughed at Sirius's impression of his mother.

"House elves on the wall?" James asked through laughs.

"Yeah, all the house elves at our house get their head on the wall after they die. Go figure!"

An hour or so later the lunch trolley rolled by and the four of them bought some Cauldron Cakes, Pumpkin Pasties, Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans, and Chocolate Frogs. They passed the time by trading Wizard Cards from the Chocolate Frog containers and tasting the Every Flavour Beans, though Remus had gotten a vomit flavoured one and wouldn't touch any after that. As they did this, Rachael amused them by telling them the story of how early in August her owl had pooped on the head of Becky Beckham.

"She freaked out!" Rachael explained, delight twinkling in her eyes. She loved it when Becky was humiliated. "She spent twenty minutes running in circles shouting 'get it off me!' Then again it really did add to her. Nasty, rotten things belong together! I got blamed for it, but it was worth it!"

"Did you do it?" Remus asked as he bit into a cauldron cake.

"No! I didn't know it had to go, if I did I would've made it go a lot earlier than I did." As Rachael told them the tale she made very careful not to mention that she had been at an orphanage. If James and Sirius found that out they would ask why and if they asked why Rachael would have to tell them about Remus, which wasn't an option. Remus was now telling them about the village bully, Philip Runsdown, and how he had finally got caught trying to beat Remus up and was sent to the county correctional facility.

"He'll be there forever or until they get sick of him at least."

James was now off on a tangent about how he met a very pretty girl in Diagon Alley. She had auburn hair, dark green eyes and, as he put it, was "just gorgeous."

Sirius and Remus sniggered.

"Hey, I met a girl like that!" Rachael said unexpectedly.

James looked up quickly. "You did?" he asked hopefully. "_Tell_ me you got her name!"

"Calm down! I did. It was...err... some name that's the name of a flower. Petunia? No."

"Come on!"

"Oh, yeah! It was Lily."

James's eyes went out of focus. "Lily," he said breathlessly. "Such a beautiful name, as she is."

Rachael, Remus and Sirius burst out laughing.

Rachael soon decided to let the boys hang out by themselves, so she went to explore the rest of the train. She walked down the passageway looking at all the compartments, thinking. Sirius and James were really nice; Remus seemed to like them as well, which was good. She walked further down until she heard a voice behind her.

"What're you doing?" It was an icy cold voice, low and menacing, definitely not that of a first year. Rachael wheeled around to find herself face to face with a most shocking sight. There stood a boy who couldn't be much older than she was behind her. He had long, slimy black hair, cold black eyes that glittered threateningly, and a mean face. He was looking down at her with a look of disgust. If she wasn't so shocked she might've been wearing the same look.

"What's it to you?" she snapped.  
"Well, I thought you were up to no good," the boy answered in the same icy voice.

Rachael gave him a look, _who does he think he is_? "What d'you think you are? A prefect?"

The boy's eyes narrowed. "Well aren't you a big mouth."

His hand went into his robe pockets as if he was searching for something, which he was. Rachael began trying to sneak her way back to the compartment when the boy withdrew his wand.

"Y-you're crazy," Rachael said, eyeing the wand nervously.

That set the boy off. He opened his mouth but,

"Oi, Snape!" She and the boy turned around to see Sirius, James and Remus walking towards them. The boy named Snape looked at Sirius with disgust and Sirius seemed to be quite pleased about it, judging by how broad his grin was. They stopped right in front of Snape. "Whatcha doing Snapey?" Sirius asked in a voice suggesting that he was talking to a five year old.

"Stuff it, Black," Snape growled.

James and Sirius laughed; obviously they had dealt with this boy before and didn't see him as much of a threat.

"Stuff what?" Sirius asked innocently. "I haven't got anything to stuff." He walked around Snape and stood beside Rachael. "Now would you mind telling me what you were doing? Because if I didn't know any better-"

"Which you don't."

"I'd say you were trying to hex our friend here."

"I wasn't trying to hex her!" Snape tried hiding his wand out of sight but Sirius saw it and snatched it.

"Wasn't trying to hex her, huh?" Snape growled and walked away furiously. The boys turned around and told her who that was. It had just so happened that while she was out in the hallway they had been discussing Snape and telling Remus about him. As it turned out, Snape was a very rotten kid, no friends, didn't deserve any, knew more about the Dark Arts than any Hogwarts professor, terrible attitude, hated most kids, and was most likely going to be a Slytherin, the usual. They got back to the compartment and James pulled out a pack of Exploding Snap cards, offering a game or two.

Despite her being a witch and knowing it, Rachael had never been much of an Exploding Snap player; she was more for Wizards' Chess. Remus was the card player. Every time she, he, their mum and dad played, Remus would always win. They used to bet on the games, each of them would put up something like a pack of candy or a wizard card, but never money. They soon learnt that was a smart thing to do, Remus never lost. He always took the pool. He once ended up with nearly two hundred packs of candy because in the one-week he and his sister played twenty games with ridiculously high wages.

"Jeez, Remus!" James exclaimed as Remus won for the fourth time in a row. Rachael's, James's and Sirius's faces were covered in ashes from the exploding cards whereas Remus's face was ash free. "How many times do you play a week?"

"Actually, I haven't played in a long time," Remus answered as he dealt out more cards for a new match. James looked at him as though he had five heads. He shook his head and they began to play.


	11. The Sorting Ceremony

Chapter Eleven  
The Sorting Ceremony

"Come on, fir's years! Fir's years this way!" shouted a large man with a bushy beard, who was towering over all the students as they disembarked the train. He was holding a lantern and waving for the first years to follow him. Rachael, Remus, Sirius and James glanced at each other quickly and followed the man as he led them to a giant lake, sparkling as the moonlight reflected on the motionless water. On the coast there were several wooden boats that could seat four apiece. Of course, the large man needed a single one to himself.

The four friends took a boat and headed out onto the lake, following the man as he took them off into the distance. They traveled slowly over the water, looking around as though expecting something to happen. They passed through a tunnel of tree branches and then first set their eyes on Hogwarts Castle. Large and cavernous, tall torch lit towers, deep corridors, a ghost floated past the window. It was marvelous!

They docked on the shore and the man brought them up the stone steps, through a pair of giant double doors, and into the Entrance Hall. They went up a large marble staircase and found themselves faced with a strict-looking witch with her hair in a bun and was peering at the sternly through square rimmed glasses. She sized them up and then turned to the giant man.

"Thank you, Hagrid," she said stiffly. "I will deal with them from here."

The giant named Hagrid nodded and said, "Right, Professor McGonagall," and was gone through another pair of doors.

Professor McGonagall gazed over the students before she began her speech to them.

"Okay, first years," she said briskly. "In a moment you will enter through these doors," she indicated the set of doors that stood behind her, "and will join your classmates. You will then be sorted by the school Sorting Hat into the four school houses. They are Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin. Each house has its own qualities and has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are here, your house will be your family. Your achievements will earn your house points whereas rule breaking will lose them.

"Now, come along. I expect they're ready for you."

Completely fear stricken, all the first years followed the professor. She brought them into the Great Hall. In the hall were the four house tables, the staff table at the head of the room, candles were floating in mid air and the ceiling was an exact reflection of the sky outside. Rachael looked at the ceiling in awe and didn't notice when she bumped into the girl standing in front of her. The girl stumbled forward and turned around to see who had bumped her. It was Lily from Diagon Alley.

"Oh sorry, Lily," Rachael said, stepping back.

Lily smiled. "It's okay. Rachael, isn't it?" Rachael nodded. "So, are you nervous?"

Rachael looked up at the staff table, then to the patched and frayed Sorting Hat on the stool feet in front of them, then looked back to Lily and nodded.

Professor McGonagall called for quiet and the Sorting Hat's rim split open and it burst into song:

"_Way back when, when I was newly sewn  
There were four wizards of renown  
Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin were their name  
Pride in magic is what they hoped to gain  
But they faced a great problem  
How were they to choose?  
Those who had what they seek  
Yes it was me they had choose  
I will pick those special those  
Who possess what it takes  
Who know what it makes  
To be a wizard or witch  
To learn every pitch  
So sit down and don't be shy  
For it won't be you who picks  
It shall be I  
Try me on and you shall see  
Just where you ought to be"_

The hall burst into cheers and the Sorting began.

"ABBOT, SUSAN!" Professor McGonagall called.

A small blonde haired girl walked nervously up to the Sorting Hat and sat, knees trembling, on the stool. The brim of the hat ripped open and it shouted for the entire hall to hear. "HUFFLEPUFF!"

Susan jumped off the stool, looking relieved, and ran to the Hufflepuff table. Next was a small boy named Alex Anderson, who became a Ravenclaw. Then it was Sammy Bickles (Slytherin), Maria Bian (Hufflepuff), and then,

"Black, Sirius!"

Sirius walked slowly up to the Sorting Hat and jammed it on his head. The hat took a long time before it decided where to put Sirius. Rachael wondered why, but then remembered what Sirius had said on the train - that his parents wanted him to be a Slytherin but he plainly didn't want to be one. When it seemed as though Sirius was a lost cause, the hat yelled out, "GRYFFINDOR!" The Gryffindor table burst into wild applause as Sirius took an empty seat at the end.

Bullock, Sondra became a Slytherin, along with Bullstrode, Peter. Several people rolled by into the four houses, none seemed to have any difficulty. All seemed to be pretty set on one house, but Rachael still wasn't sure if she'd make it into Gryffindor like she wanted. A few names later, it was Lily's turn and she became the second Gryffindor out of the lot. There were few Slytherins here and there, a Ravenclaw in the bunch, a Hufflepuff or two. There were rarely any Gryffindors until Alice Gordon became one along with Frank Longbottom. Then, after Philip Lucidan was sorted in Ravenclaw, it was time for,

"Lupin, Rachael!"

Rachael was startled by her name being called that she nearly forgot to go up, but Remus shoved her from behind and hissed in her ear for her to move. She walked timidly up to the Sorting Hat and slowly placed it on her head.

"Hmm," the hat said thoughtfully. "Yes, yes, I see... you don't know where you want to be, aye? Well I see talent, bravery, who else could have gone into that forest?" Rachael was alarmed, it knew about the forest. "But I see in you a GRYFFINDOR!"

Utterly relieved, Rachael raced over to the Gryffindor table and slid into the seat next to Lily. She looked back up at the sorting.

"Lupin, Remus!"

Remus walked, trying to look calm, to the hat and sat down for a split second before the hat announced him as a Gryffindor. James became a Gryffindor, along with a little mousy boy named Peter Pettigrew, and Snape (whose first named turned out to be Severus) was a Slytherin ("Ha! What'd I tell you?" Sirius whispered triumphantly). The last student was sorted into Hufflepuff and Professor McGonagall took the stool out of the hall, returning a minute later to slip into a seat next to Professor Dumbledore.

The Headmaster stood up and called for silence.

"Welcome to another fine year at Hogwarts," he said, his blue eyes surveying the young witches and wizards around him. "Now, normally I do the announcements after the feast but this year I have an extremely important announcement that I feel cannot wait. As you all know, the forest on the edge of the grounds is off limits to all students, and I mean _all_ students for those few troublemakers." His eyes grazed over two or three students sitting at the Slytherin table. The ones he was referring to looked around, pretending to be innocent. "Now, we have a new plant on the grounds. It is called a Whomping Willow, which I am sure most of you have learned about in Herbology. It is a highly dangerous plant and I therefore warn you not to go near it. If you wish to lose a limb or two, then by all means go near it." There was a chuckle or two from the first years, particularly from James and Sirius, but Rachael wondered why Remus didn't join in.

"I am terribly sorry to be the one to tell you all that our beloved Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher has retired and will no longer be with us. But we have a replacement that I am sure you will most enjoy. Our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Gregory Lupin."

"DAD?" both Rachael and Remus sputtered out, causing the whole hall to snigger rudely.

Dumbledore, however, understood them.

"Yes, Mr. and Miss Lupin," he said with a little laugh. "Professor Lupin has kindly agreed to fulfil the position and I hope you will all be respectful and learn a lot from him. Now, without further ado, let the feast begin!"

All the golden platters on the table were filled with every kind of food imaginable. Pork chops, lamb chops, roasted potatoes, fried potatoes... everything! The boys, Rachael and Lily felt quite ravenous and began loading up plates.

"That's your dad?" Sirius asked as he stuck his fork into a pile of mashed potatoes.

"No," said Remus in a mocking voice.

"We just said 'dad' because we felt like it," Rachael joked.

Suddenly there was a stream of silver sweeping past them that seemed to be cackling manically. They turned around; it went past them again and began circling their end of the table laughing loudly and rudely screeching, "Ooooooh 'ickle firsties! How fun!" It swooped through them to the table, picked up a bowl of mashed potatoes and dumped it on James's head. James, fuming, took the bowl and flung it on the table and tried wiping the mashed potatoes out of his hair.

"Peeves!" The five looked to see Professor Lupin running towards them with his wand. He was looking at Peeves evilly. As the form of Peeves slowly came into view, they saw that he was a bright faced, evil looking ghost that was trying hard not to laugh. "Peeves, what do you think you're doing?"

"Having firstie fun!" Peeves answered in a saintly voice. "Why doesn't he look _beeeuteful_?"

Professor Lupin looked down at James, who was occupied with a stack of napkins and his hair. Professor Lupin walked over to James and tapped his wand on his head. Immediately James's head was potato free.

"Thanks, Professor," James said gratefully.

"So, I see you've all met Peeves?" Professor Lupin said looking at them.

They nodded.

"Is he always like that?" Sirius asked.

The professor nodded. "Only the Bloody Baron can control him. The Fat Friar, Nearly Headless Nick and the rest of the ghosts just like to stay as far away from him as possible. Well, actually, the Fat Friar feels sorry for him. So, are you eager to start classes?"

They all nodded half-heartedly. Professor Lupin started to walk away back up to the staff table.

"Hey, Dad?" Rachael said, catching him before he could leave. He turned around and raised an eyebrow. "Can I talk to you later or early tomorrow or something?"

He smiled and nodded.

Full to bursting with pudding, the first years followed the Gryffindor Prefect up to Gryffindor Tower. The Prefect showed them where their dormitories are; the girls were to the right and the boys to the left. Rachael went with Lily and Alice into the girls' dormitory to find three beds and all their belongings had been brought up. Too tired to say anything to each other, they all went to sleep the moment their heads hit the pillows.


	12. Herbology Hazard

Chapter Twelve  
Herbology Hazard

"Let's see… first is Herbology out in the greenhouses, next Potions and, to our luck, it's with the Slytherins! They just seem to love us, don't they?" Rachael, Remus, and Sirius were sitting in the Great Hall listening to James read the schedule. "After potions is Transfiguration, then Defence Against the Dark Arts, Charms, lunch and finally, History of Magic."

"I heard Binns is such a boring teacher," Rachael said as she began piling bacon onto her plate. "Least that's what I heard a couple of fifth years saying."

They began eating their breakfast when the boy named Peter Pettigrew came over to them. "Can I see your schedule?" he asked politely. "McGonagall never gave me mine."

James handed it to him. Peter muttered a quick thank you and sat down besides Remus so he could read it. Lily was talking to Alice Gordon and Rachael was sitting with her brother, James and Sirius. They were all looking forward to the first day of classes, eager to learn some magic. Rachael and Remus were really looking forward to Defence Against the Dark Arts; they wanted to see their dad teach. The bell to signal the beginning of class rang and they hurried out of the building down to the greenhouses, where all of the Gryffindors were gathering with the Ravenclaw first years into greenhouse one.

The professor, Professor Sprout, was a squat little witch who was beaming at them through the dirt on her face. She gestured for them to follow her into the greenhouse. It was terribly warm and cluttered with all different plants, some moving, some snapping, and some just sitting there looking bored. They saw a long row of tables and for each three places was a small plant. They were small, human like creatures, much like the Mandrake plants, but much uglier. They were scrawny, skeleton like, fanged, dirt covered and their eyes were squinted and mouths wide open. All of the students looked at them disgusted, but Professor Sprout looked at them quite adoringly.

"Imp Bells!" she said brightly as everyone looked at her funny. "Oh come now, they're really fascinating creatures."

"Fascinating, yes," said a Ravenclaw whom Rachael recognised as Alex Anderson. "But ugly!"

The students snorted. They looked up at the teacher, expecting to see her looking a little disconcerted but, luckily, she was smiling. She cleared her throat and walked over to her Imp Bell. Rachael wondered why the word "bell" was included in the name, then she saw that the head was shaped much like an upside down bell. The head was a sort of cone with eyes, a nose and a mouth. She picked hers up, with extreme caution, and held its bottom in her right hand and its neck in her left.

"Now, I should warn you all," she began sternly, trying to keep her Imp Bell still, as it was fidgeting wildly, "Imp Bells are not the nicest creatures; you don't want to go doing something wrong. See the fangs?" She indicated the sharp fangs protruding from the plants mouth and going past its chin. "If you do something wrong you will become acquainted with them. So, they are very hungry, which is why you want to be cautious and it will be your task to feed them." There was a loud groan from the class. "Oh, don't be upset they are very good when being fed. Now to feed them you need to take the worms there in the pot."

All the students looked towards the tables and saw several clay pots filled to the top with wriggling worms. "You will feed them the worms for the entire class. They aren't easily full, so it will take time. Now I will break you up into pairs of threes."

Professor Sprout began shuffling through students, pulling them apart and sticking them with someone else and then finding three students standing by each other and naming them a trio. She went over to Rachael, who was standing next to Remus and Alex Anderson, and made them a trio. They walked over to a particularly calm looking Imp Bell, pulled on their dragon skin gloves and began to feed them.

"These things are nasty," Rachael muttered as she held a handful of worms in her hand. She took one and dropped it into the Bell's mouth. The Bell's eyes swiveled up to her and it spit the worm in her face. Wiping worm guts off her face, Rachael looked around at the rest of the class to make sure they hadn't noticed. Remus and Alex were talking quietly as they fed the Imp Bell, who was behaving for them at least. They seemed to be talking about the Defence Against the Dark Arts class.

"I hear that the first years don't do anything except learn about the creatures and stuff," Alex was saying.

"Well, maybe they'll let us do something," Remus added, wiping slime off his hands.

"Well, can't you ask your dad about that? He _is_ the professor, after all."

"My dad can't do that. It's just his job; he doesn't make up what we learn."

They stopped discussing that topic.

Now when most think of worms their stomachs cringe, but feeding worms to a creature that's even more disgusting makes worms seem almost like a delicacy. The Imp Bells wailed and cried every time their mouths were forced open so they could be fed. They smelled like Dragon Dung and were just a murder to look at.

Peter Pettigrew's Imp Bell tipped the pot over and it fell to a floor with a smash and soil covered the greenhouse floor as the Bell made a break for the exit. All the students abandoned their own plants to go and chase it, but the Imp Bell was quicker. It soon had found its way onto the greenhouse roof and everyone tried jumping on top to get it back. All of the Ravenclaw students were too short, so the Gryffindors (who were slightly taller) tried to climb up. James attempted to give Sirius a leg up but it ended up that one of the worms had wriggled its way out of the greenhouse and crawled its way up James's pants leg and he freaked out, dropping Sirius to the ground.

Lily and Alice tried finding a way to make the Bell levitate down to the ground, but they ended up setting the roof on fire and Professor Sprout had to rush to put the fire out. Finally, Rachael managed to lift Remus onto the roof and he brought the Bell down, only after it bit Remus's hand and they had to bring him to the infirmary. Peter, as a punishment for being careless, had to feed all of the Imp Bells while the rest of the class spent their time outside. Rachael, Sirius and James accompanied Remus to the infirmary, where James and Sirius were startled to hear Madam Pomfrey (the school nurse) asking Remus if it was time yet.

"What's she talking about?" James asked as they walked to the dungeons for potions. Madam Pomfrey had been able to cure Remus's hand in a manner of a minute.

"N-nothing," Remus said warily. "I dunno what she was talking about."

Potions class could be put into a single word - torture. First off, the professor was rude, arrogant, slimy, horrible, and just about every other synonym you could find for mean. Professor Binstom, a hairy old man with no neck and small beady eyes, spent half the class lecturing them about the fine art of potion brewing, and then sprung a pop quiz on them, which all the Gryffindors were sure they had failed. Meanwhile, the Slytherins had gotten a heads up and learned about the quiz the night before and had time to study. After the quiz (which Professor Binstom had been kind enough to grade them in the blink of an eye and announced the Gryffindors' horrible scores to the entire class) they started brewing a Shrinking Solution in which Rachael had been paired with Snape, where he purposely added extra daisy roots to her cauldron so it exploded in her face, making it break out in boils.

After another quick trip to the infirmary, they were off to Transfiguration, where they were thankful for a calm, uneventful period in which there wasn't a disaster. Professor McGonagall gave them a strict talking to before handing them out a match which they were to turn into a needle. Of course they had to copy a whole board of the most puzzling notes they had ever seen in their life before they were actually able to attempt the transfiguring. By the end of class, several matches had disintegrated, some just stayed matches some rolled over on the desks and no one was able to get the match to change one bit. Professor McGonagall was displeased with the results, She had been hoping for at least one student to have some change in their match, and, as a result, she assigned them to practise for the night and she said she would know if they had practised or not.


	13. Unraveling the Tale

Chapter Thirteen  
Unraveling the Tale

Everyone had been looking forward to Defence Against the Dark Arts. They wanted to learn about warding off evil creatures, and hexes. They wanted to do practical assignments and experiment with actual live creatures. Who wouldn't love a class like that? As it turned out - no one. Professor Lupin couldn't give them any practical work to do because, being that they were only first years, none of the other professors wanted them to start with something that advanced.

Class started as thus,

"Okay we'll start with role call," Professor Lupin said, pulling out a sheet of parchment from his desk. "Sirius Black? Here, good. Lily Evans? Over there. Alice Gordon… oh, right there. Frank Longbottom, okay. Rachael Lupin, yes there you are. Remus Lupin, next to his sister. Peter Pettigrew, right there. Be careful with that desk, Mr. Pettigrew, the leg is a little wobbly. Lastly, James Potter. Okay we're all here, then." He folded the parchment into fours and placed it on his desk. "Welcome to first year Defence Against the Dark Arts. You guys are my second class today, first was a group of Slytherin sixth years, not fun. So we will be learning about the different magical creatures that roam our land. The whole year will be based on that and there are plenty to learn.

"We won't be able work with them though. You won't be doing that until third year, but we'll make the best of it. Some of the ones we'll be studying are Hinkypunks, Grindylows. We will go a bit into Boggarts, and werewolves." His voice went very low and hesitant as he spoke werewolves and his eyes gently grazed past Remus. "Vampires, all that stuff. Now today we will be starting with Grindylows."

They spent part of the period listening to Professor Lupin describe the Grindylows. He told them a tale about how, when he came to Hogwarts, his friends had dared him to dive into the lake and bring back the giant squid and, instead, a Grindylow brought _him _back. Then, after that, they were assigned work to do from their textbook.

Once class was dismissed, they all began to file out.

"Rachael," Professor Lupin called. "Come here, please. Remus, would you tell Professor Flitwick she'll be a little late?"

Remus nodded and walked out with his friends.

Rachael went up to her dad and he nodded for her to sit down. "Yes?" she said.

"Yesterday you said you wanted to talk to me."

Rachael nodded, feeling slightly awkward. Here she was, sitting with her father, yet he was just asking as though she was just a student and not his daughter. "I did," she answered quietly.

"What about?"

"Well, I was wondering, how'd you end up here? What happened to your job down in the Magical Menagerie?"

Her dad studied her for a while through his glasses, seemingly having difficulty trying to find the right words to say. Finally,

"Well, you knew how hard it was to get money from that job? I could hardly support you guys. I wouldn't be as hard but it still would be. I worked there for a little longer, trying to raise enough money to raise myself and hopefully you."

"So, you _were_ trying to get me back?"

"Yes, I was. I suppose you thought I forgot all about you. I don't blame you. The way your mother reacted, and having you put in that dreadful orphanage. You must've hated it there, being there with all those people that didn't know why you were there, not even that one woman who was a witch."

"You have no idea." Rachael sunk back in her chair as she remembered her time at the orphanage.

"I also wanted to talk to you."

"'Bout what?"

"About what happened that day in the forest? Why'd you go in there?"

"It was Remus's idea. He said it was shortcut or something; it wasn't my fault it happened! Everyone just says it was… I ran into a tree! I never saw anything! And here's something I wanted to know… why did you let Mum just send me away like that?" Rachael didn't know didn't know what had come over her. It was an unexplainable rage. She had kept it inside her for so long; she had to let it out, and now was the time. "How come you didn't stop her? You just gave in like that! You wouldn't argue or anything-"

"I did!"

"Oh it really worked then, I still went there. I had to spend three years being bossed around by some snotty kid, getting yelled at by a bitter old woman who kept making me write lines on the blackboard. I haven't had a decent happy birthday until this year when people actually _remembered_ it was my birthday. I can't count how many times I went into the infirmary. But no, just send the kid away to the orphanage where no one will understand her, where no one will accept her because she was disowned!"

"Rachel Michelle Lupin!" her father boomed. He was on his feet, with a fury blazing in his eyes. "Do you think I wanted to send you there? You think I wanted my daughter put somewhere like that? No, I didn't! You have no right to assume I did! Now get out and get to class!"

Giving her father one last look, Rachael rushed out of the classroom and up to Charms where Professor Flitwick had the rest of the class writing notes about levitation. She slipped into the seat beside Lily and began copying the notes, though she was barely taking in what she was writing. Why had she blown up at her dad like that? She knew it wasn't his fault, but no she had to blame him. She had to blame someone, but it wasn't her dad.

Rachael remembered that day as sharp as anything, well everything after she ran into the tree. She remembered waking up in St. Mungo's, listening to Dr. Griemer say that they didn't know what was wrong with her brother. She remembered thinking he was dead. She recalled when she learned the truth, her mother yelling at her. Her mother... That was who should be blamed for all of this; no one could hold any more blame than her. Why had she reacted like that? Rachael had said she didn't know what happened. Did her mother think she was lying? Thinking she had just tried to avoid getting into trouble? Remus had an excuse for her already. But still, Remus had only just woken up; he couldn't have had the time to create an excuse. She was still blamed!

"Class," Professor Flitwick said suddenly in his squeaky high-pitched voice. "Now that we have our notes copied we shall begin practising the Levitation Spell, which is, as you see on the board, Wingardium Leviosa. The movements are a simple swish and flick, you try now."

Everyone picked up their wands, swishing them, flicking them, muttering the spell words, but still the feathers they had been given to practise with didn't move. Rachael managed to get her feather a mere centimeter off her desk, but it fluttered back onto the desktop before Flitwick could notice.

Charms Class was dismissed and all the Gryffindor first years hurried down to the Great Hall. Rachael sat down with Lily and they began taking their lunch as it appeared on the golden platters on the table.

"So," Rachael said. "All we have is History of Magic, right?" Lily nodded. Rachael fiddled around with her fork. "Herbology was interesting, wasn't it?"

A smile flickered on Lily's mouth. "Who knew me and Alice could set the greenhouse on fire?" she joked.

Now that the greenhouse was safe, the thought of nearly destroying it was near hilarious. Rachael looked towards the door and saw James, Sirius, Remus and, for some odd reason, Peter Pettigrew. As the boys walked by, James said a very dramatic, "_hullo Lily_," but, to his disappointment, she didn't even pay attention to him. Sirius and Peter followed James to the end of the table but Remus wanted to ask Rachael a question. He took the empty seat next to his sister.

"What'd Dad want to talk to you about?" he asked quietly. "I saw him in the hallway before and asked him, but he just said 'the last thing I want to discuss is your sister.'"

Rachael looked quickly at Lily, who was watching them talk. She couldn't say in front of Lily and she did look a bit suspicious. "I'll tell you up in the common room," she answered, looking apprehensively at Lily.

Remus nodded and muttered, "Now."

"Oh, err, Lily I have to go up to the common room for a minute and give something to Remus. I'll be right back."

"I'll come with you," Lily volunteered.

"No, no that's okay!" Rachael said quickly, holding her hand out to prevent Lily from following them. "You just stay here, we won't be long."

Looking slightly put off, and offended; Lily sat down, while Rachael and Remus made their way out of the Great Hall, through the Entrance Hall and all the way up to the Gryffindor Tower, where they saw the portrait to the Gryffindor common room, The Fat Lady, having tea with another unfamiliar portrait. They walked up to it and Remus said the password.

"Fairy Lights," he said. They didn't hear him; they just kept on going as though they weren't there. "Fairy lights!" Remus said louder. Still they kept on talking. "FAIRY LIGHTS!"

The Fat Lady jumped in her portrait and turned around to look at who was making such a racket. She frowned at Remus. "Honestly, Mr. Lupin," she said in a stiff, annoyed tone. "If you wanted to get in you could have asked nicely."

Remus rolled his eyes as the portrait swung open and he and Rachael climbed in. They entered a deserted common room, no one seemed to be in there, but just to make sure Remus checked the boys' dormitories and Rachael checked the girls'. Luckily they found no one that could possibly overhear them, except the Fat Lady, but they doubted she would even be able to hear.

They both took seats on the two armchairs near the crackling fire.

"So," Remus said, "what'd Dad want to talk to you about?"

"Well," Rachael began; she still was a bit angry at both her dad and herself about that conversation and didn't want to tell it over. "Remember at the feast yesterday when I said I wanted to talk to dad?" Remus nodded. "Well, he wanted to know what I wanted to talk to him about."

"And that would be…?"

"I just wanted to know how he ended up here. He said he worked at the Menagerie for a little more, trying to get money to get me back. Obviously it didn't work, so I guess that's how he ended up here. He never said really."

Remus leaned back in his seat and nodded. "Okay, but why was he mad at you?"

"Because after that he said he needed to talk to me too. About what happened, you know, the day you were… bitten. I told him that you said we should go in the forest 'because it would be quicker to get home. I said I saw nothing but then I got a little mad at dad, I don't know why. I yelled at him saying that why didn't he try to stop Mum from sending me to the orphanage. Dad got mad at me for yelling at him and, so, that's about it."

Remus didn't say anything; he merely studied her, apparently trying to figure out what to say. He couldn't blame his sister for being upset about the whole thing, who wouldn't be? But still, she shouldn't have yelled at their dad either. Remus knew he didn't want her to go. If she had seen him when he got back from bringing her there, if she had seen him then….

She didn't see him later that day either, the arguement their dad and mum had, before their dad left. Remus wasn't supposed to be listening; he was supposed to be in his room, cleaning it up. But he had gone downstairs to look for his sneakers so he could put them away and avoid being yelled at about being careless and that one day someone would trip over them. He was at the foot of the stairs when he walked in on the arguement.

His parents had been putting the dinner dishes away, but then their dad brought up the subject of Rachael. He said that putting her in an orphanage wasn't the solution to the problem, and that she didn't cause the problem either. She hadn't suggested going into the forest, she hadn't been the one to see any of it happen. She didn't see Remus get bitten. None of it was her fault, she was purely innocent. She shouldn't have been blamed. He said when he found them both in the forest, both of them covered in blood, not moving, both looking dead; it was the worst day of his life. Neither of them should have been in there.

_Rachael wasn't to blame, she didn't suggest going into the forest… Remus did._

Well when he said that, their mum, who had been silent the whole time, got to have her part in the conversation. She said (at the top of her voice) that he shouldn't blame Remus. Remus wasn't the one to blame; he was the one to suffer. It was all Rachael's fault. Then, this was the worst part; Rachael was a terrible sister who should have been condemned to death for what she caused. No one, she repeated, _no one_ would blame her son.

Well, that was the final straw for their dad. He didn't even look at his wife when he said, "You evil woman… you… TALKING ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER THAT WAY! SAYING SHE SHOULD DIE FOR SOMETHING SHE DIDN'T EVEN DO! IF ANYONE SHOULD DIE IT SHOULD BE YOU!" And with that, he stormed out of the house. Remus never saw him again.

After the arguement, Remus disappeared back into his room and sat there for hours with the conversation he had heard replaying in his head. _Rachael wasn't to blame, she didn't suggest going into the forest… Remus did._ He had said to go in there, he said it would be easier to get home through there. It wasn't his sister's fault… it was his. It was _his_ fault they were in there. It was _his_ fault they woke up in a hospital, his sister with a broken nose and two black eyes, him with something much worse. It was _his_ fault his mum hated his sister; it was _his_ fault he had to experience the worst of pain. It was _his_ fault his sister went to an orphanage. It was _his_ fault he was a werewolf. If anyone was to blame… it was _him_.

Remus told Rachael everything that had happened the day she left; it was hard for him, but he had to. Rachael listened quietly, nodding every so often, but never saying anything. Her face was blank, but he knew she was listening.

"So that's what happened," Remus finished.

"Mum said that?" she asked quietly, nearly to herself. "Mum said I should die? Well next time you talk to her, tell her she almost got what she wanted!"

"What?"

Rachael leaned back in her chair and took a deep breath.

* * *

It had been a week after her tenth birthday; classes in the orphanage had started up again. It had been a weeklong ridicule fest for Becky and her friends. Every day of the first week of school Becky and her friends would seek out Rachael, who took classes with different teachers than they did, and find ways to humiliate her. This year had been the worst. So far, she had been given a swirlie, locked in the utility closet for five hours and several other things. She couldn't take it anymore.

She was walking down towards Ms. Marshall's room, looking for something, something that would take care of all her problems. She didn't care about what she going to do. As far as she was concerned, it would be much better than what she had to deal with, what she had dealt with already. It was just a way to get away from her problems for good. She crept stealthily into her personal instructor's room, being careful not to make too much noise because she was sure Ms. Marshall or Becky were lurking somewhere close by and they would catch her.

She looked around the room and spotted a long wooden stick on the bureau. Of course it was a wooden stick to the unknowing, but Rachael knew what it was… it was a wand. She snuck over and gently picked the wand up. This was it, now or never, she had to do it. It would solve her problems forever. She held the wand to her heart, even though she didn't need to.

"Avad-" she began but,

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Startled, Rachael dropped the wand and spun to the door. Ms. Marshall was standing there, wide-eyed, furious, but, for once in her life, looked worried. "What do you think you're doing?" She ran over and snatched the wand off the floor. She was lost for words now, waiting for Rachael to respond, but Rachael's eyes were locked on the wand. She wasn't going to give up so easily.

"Give me the wand!" she shouted, making a swift grab for it but Ms. Marshall was quicker. Rachael didn't know what came over her, she couldn't control herself; she wanted the wand. She wanted to end it all. Ms. Marshall wouldn't let her, despite how much she despised Rachael she couldn't let her give in so easily. She took the wand and locked it in a special safe that only she could open and ran Rachael to the infirmary.

"Give me the wand!" Rachael kept saying over and over until her instructor had to clap her hand over Rachael's mouth to keep people from hearing her. When they got there the nurse asked what was wrong and why Ms. Marshall looked so worried.

"She tried to kill herself!"

* * *

"I spent a month there," Rachael said, now pacing up and down in front of the common room fire. "Everyone thought I was crazy, and they were right. I just couldn't take it anymore, everyone hated me. Everyone wanted to do nothing to me but torture me and humiliate me! I just wanted to end it all. Now I realise how stupid I was, thinking that killing myself would end it all. It'd end it all for me, but not for everyone who actually cared about me. It would stay with them forever."

"You tried to do that?" Remus said, now scared of his sister. Rachael nodded. "But… but that's…" He couldn't believe what he was hearing. It sounded nothing like the sister he had known three years ago. She had always been smart, logical, never one to do something so… so… drastic. And here she was, talking about it. "What'd the nurse say?"

"Nothing really. She just nodded, told me to get into one of the empty beds and told me to just go to sleep. She probably watched me the whole time to make sure I didn't try it again… I was just so stupid!"

"You said you wouldn't be long."

Rachael and Remus turned to see Lily standing at the common room entrance. She looked relaxed but sounded annoyed.

Rachael had forgotten all about Lily. "Sorry… I… sorry I just got…err… caught up in telling my brother something."

She smiled. "It's alright. Come on we have History of Magic to get to."

She nodded and they followed Lily out of the common room. As they were walking to class Rachael couldn't help but feel a little bit better. It was good to finally tell someone that, despite how hard it was. She had never told anyone before and she just wondered, _had I scared Remus_? _Well of course I did but_… him telling her that her mum wanted her dead just made her realise that at one point she agreed with her.


	14. Transformation

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen  
Transformation

The first month of school was like a blur after that day, which had gone so incredibly slow you would think you had lived ten lifetimes before nighttime fell. In History of Magic, Rachael was slumped so low in her seat from almost falling asleep that Professor Binns (who was their only ghost professor) didn't even notice she was in the room and almost marked her absent before she jerked up and said she was there.

On the first of October all of the Gryffindor first years were sitting in the common room before class started. They would have been in the Great Hall, but Peeves had caused some destruction and scared the poor house elves. The staff had to calm them all down and clean up the Great Hall before lunchtime. James, Sirius and Peter were sitting around the small wooden table. Lily and Rachael were sitting on the scarlet couch, while Frank and Alice were occupying the two armchairs.

"Where's Remus?" James asked Rachael suddenly.

She shrugged and said she'd go look for him. She got up and headed for the boys' dormitory. She stood at the doorway and looked around, Remus wasn't there, _strange_. Rachael glanced over towards the left and saw a calendar on Remus's bed. Curious, she walked over and picked it up. Remus had marked off all the days on his calendar and on October 1st it said, in very tiny, almost unreadable writing, _full moon_. Rachael hid the calendar under Remus's pillow to make sure James and Sirius didn't see it.

Rachael ran back down to the common room and said she was going to class a bit early. Lily offered to go with her, but Rachael managed to break off from her, saying she had forgotten something back at the common room. She turned around a corner and found herself in front of the Hospital Wing. She peered through the glass window on the door and saw her brother sitting on a chair in the corner of the room. His face was pale and his eyes unfocused.

She knocked on the door and Madam Pomfrey came bustling over.

"Can I help you?" she said stiffly.

"Yes, can I just talk to my brother, Remus?" Rachael asked politely.

Madam Pomfrey nodded and moved aside so Rachael could get in. Remus looked up when he heard her voice. Madam Pomfrey disappeared into her office.

"Everyone was looking for you," Rachael said to Remus. "You didn't give them an excuse?"

"Excuse for what?" Remus asked listlessly.

"For why you're not going to be in class."

"Oh yeah… Can you tell them I went home to visit Mum?"

"That wouldn't work!"

"Why?"

"They'd ask why _I_ wasn't going."

"Just please tell them!"

Rachael nodded; she would never refuse her brother when it came to this. She asked if he was going to be okay or needed anything. He shook his head and said she should just get to class. Rachael left the wing and caught up with Lily out on the grounds as she was heading to the greenhouses. Lily was now walking with Alice Gordon, who said a merry hullo to Rachael, and they continued down the grassy slope to the greenhouses.

When they got to the first greenhouse they expected to see Professor Sprout standing there but, to their complete surprise, they saw Hagrid there instead. Rachael, Lily and Alice joined up with Sirius, James, Peter and Frank while they waited for the Ravenclaws to get to class.

Hagrid saw what they were waiting for and laughed. "I'm afraid we'll be waitin' a while 'fore they come," he said, a hint of seriousness in his voice.

Frank turned to him. "Why?"

"Well…err… the Ravenclaw firs' years didn't hear about the…err… little problem with Peeves and Peeves found 'em. They all got shoved into the Vanishing Cabinet. The staff's tryin' to find 'em. But let's just begin without 'em."

"Where's Professor Sprout?" James asked.

"With the staff."

James nodded and they all followed Hagrid into the greenhouses. They were still working with the Imp Bells, the same pair with the same Bell so the Bell wouldn't get confused. Today, Rachael's group was two people short. She went to find her Imp Bell, only to find that it had found a bowl of worms and was feeding itself.

"Hey, it's doing my work for me!" Rachael laughed.

They had still been feeding them, really boring work. Today they were supposed to advance on the proper way to plant them into a garden because, incredible as it may seem, people actually tried to grow them or to plant a garden full of grown ones. Hagrid walked over to Professor Sprout's desk and pulled out a sheet of parchment with the class roster. He read off all the Gryffindor names: Sirius, Lily, Alice, Frank, Rachael.

"Where's Remus?" Hagrid asked, looking around at all the Gryffindors. They all had blank looks except for Rachael who raised her hand. "Excuse me?"

"Miss Lupin?"

"My and Remus's Mum is sick. Remus went to go visit her," she lied, feeling rather stupid doing so because she knew what was coming next.

"Why didn't yeh go with him?"

This required some very quick thinking.

"Well… you see… the sickness my mum has is – err - contagious through the girls in our family and… I'm not allowed to go near her!"

The class sniggered. She knew it was a pathetic excuse but she had to make up something. Luckily, Hagrid bought the whole story.

As it turned out, the staff spent the entire period of Herbology looking for the Ravenclaws, who all turned up the next class stuffed inside a single toilet. The Gryffindors had Herbology without them. Since they weren't allowed to do any real lessons without the proper professor, they spent one more excruciating class feeding them, while they spit up worm guts on all the students. Hagrid put the Gryffindors into two groups. The first was the boys: James, Sirius, Peter and Frank and the other was the girls: Lily, Rachael and Alice. Hagrid made the whole class into a contest, as a mean of trying to lighten up the atmosphere because all of them were miserable from having to feed them. The contest was whoever fed the most worms to the Imp Bells won a giant slab of chocolate from Hogsmeade.

To put it lightly, neither team won. The Imp Bells were the most uncooperative that day and they wouldn't swallow a single worm, except for the one Rachael, Alex and Remus had been working on. That was only because he was hungry when he was eating them. The Gryffindors were covered in worm guts from head to foot. To get them off, they all had to jump in the lake and then rush up to Gryffindor Tower to get some new robes.

* * *

"Come on, Mr. Lupin," Madam Pomfrey said nervously, running about hospital wing, making sure everything was in check. It was nearly nightfall and Remus was feeling the worst. His head was spinning, his bones felt stiff and he didn't want to move. He was slumped in his seat, not taking in a word Madam Pomfrey was saying. "Come on, Remus!" she said again. He still didn't move. "REMUS!"

Remus jerked up and nearly fell out of his chair. Madam Pomfrey grabbed his hand and threw an Invisibility Cloak over his head and led him out down to the grounds.

* * *

Up in the common room, all the Gryffindors were relaxing after classes. Being that it was a Friday, they didn't have to worry about school the next day. Some second years were sitting in the corner, looking at a particularly large pile of wizard cards. There were several third years who were talking eagerly about the upcoming trip to the wizard village, Hogsmeade, which would take place on Halloween. The rest of the Gryffindor fourth, fifth, sixth and seventh years were either doing homework or down in the Great Hall.

Frank and Alice were still in the Great Hall and the rest were in the common room. Rachael was playing Lily in a match of Wizard Chess and James was referring with Sirius, while Peter was just serving as the audience.

"Oh, and what a beautiful move by Miss Evans," James said as one of Lily's pawns crushed one of Rachael's.

Rachael scooped up the pieces and dumped them into the box and watched as they reformed themselves.

"How come when one of my pieces takes another all you say is 'and Rachael takes a piece'?" Rachael asked grinning.

James turned red and shrugged. Sirius laughed and muttered something about James liking Lily, which, luckily, Lily didn't hear over the smashing of one of her bishops.

Sirius got up and walked over to the window after hearing a crack of thunder. "Storm coming," he said, leaning over the windowsill to look down on the grounds. "Hey, come here for a second."

Curious about what Sirius was looking at, Rachael stood up and walked over to him at the window, while everyone else just ignored him. He pointed down towards the grounds, where she could see the faint outline of Madam Pomfrey dashing across the grounds over towards the newly planted Whomping Willow, which was thrashing its boxing glove like arms at Madam Pomfrey. The nurse dodged one of the branches and grabbed a long stick off the ground. She crawled over to the willow and prodded something in its trunk. The willow stopped moving and Madam Pomfrey appeared to be talking to herself and pointed to something under the willow.

"What's she doing?" Sirius wondered aloud.

Rachael shrugged and said it was probably nothing to worry about, though she knew what it was. Remus had told her the precautions Professor Dumbledore was taking for Remus. They had planted the Whomping Willow there for him, under the willow was a passageway that led to some building in Hogsmeade. Madam Pomfrey would have to smuggle him out of the school under an Invisibility Cloak and bring him there so he could transform.

* * *

"In you go, Remus," Madam Pomfrey said quietly. She turned around to make sure no one was out on the grounds that could see, and took the Invisibility Cloak from Remus. He crouched down and he let himself fall through the small opening, where he found himself in a long tunnel. He looked back through the opening to see Madam Pomfrey pointing for him to go forward. Feeling incredibly sick, Remus sprinted with all his remaining energy down the tunnel until he felt himself bang into something.

Rubbing his sore head, Remus saw that it was a wooden door. He grasped the doorknob with his sweaty palms and pushed the door open to find a long stairwell in front of him. He looked back down the dark tunnel. He felt his stomach lurch, and ran up the steps to find himself in a small bedroom. He looked around and saw a small four-poster bed in the corner. He went down to sit on it, as he waited for his transformation to take place. He looked blankly at the wall ahead of him, his mind reeling, his stomach doing flips.

Then it hit him, a long, hard pain in the region of his stomach. He leaned forward a let out a long moan of pain. Sweat beading on his forehead, Remus felt his bones start to grow, feeling as though every inch of his body was being pierced with knives. He felt fur growing on his sweaty skin, his eyes changed from green to yellow; his ears slowly dissolved into wolf ears, his nose became a snout. His feet and hands became paws. He cried in pain, but knew it was useless, no one would help him.

Finally it stopped; he was a werewolf.


	15. Forgotten

**Chapter Fourteen  
****Forgotten  
**_**- "No, why should I listen? I've spent enough of my life listening to someone else... now its time for someone to listen to me... and I just want you to leave me alone." -**_

Rachael woke up early the next day, or at least she thought it was early. In reality, it was nearly eleven o' clock. She saw that Lily and Alice were still fast asleep and, not wanting to disturb them, she dressed silently and went down into the common room. In the common room she saw James, Sirius and Peter sitting by the fire. She saw that the storm still raging outside. The trees in the Forbidden Forest were swaying violently in the gusts of wind and the windows were fogged down.

"It's bad out there," Sirius said when he spotted Rachael. "Not even Peeves'll go out there." Rachael laughed shortly and walked over to the window, only to jump back as there was a bolt of lightening. "You think your brother's going to get back today?"

"Maybe," Rachael answered offhandedly. "Today or tomorrow."

Sirius nodded.

Rachael needed to go down to the Hospital Wing to see her brother; she hoped they got him back okay. It was his first time transforming at Hogwarts. She wasn't so sure if they managed. Rachael excused herself from the three boys saying that she had to go ask Professor McGonagall something and ran down to the Hospital Wing, only to find that no one was there. She wondered if maybe Madam Pomfrey had already gotten Remus and he was in the Great Hall, though she knew it wasn't likely. Either way, Rachael made her way down to the Great Hall to see it half full; she looked down the Gryffindor Table, no Remus. She looked up at the staff table and there was Madam Pomfrey, chatting animatedly with Professor Sinstra.

Rachael couldn't believe it. Had Madam Pomfrey forgotten about her brother? She had checked the entire Hospital Wing and saw no sign of Remus ever being there. The nurse forgot him. Without thinking, Rachael ran through the Entrance Hall, burst through the giant oak doors, literally slid down the grassy slope leading towards the Whomping Willow, getting covered from head to foot in mud while doing so, and grabbed the long stick. She advanced cautiously towards the willow's vicious branches, dodged one branch, but got hit hard in the face with another.

She fell backwards, but quickly stood up again, tasting blood in her mouth. She crawled on all fours towards the small knot and prodded it gently. The Willow froze, the branches stopped and it looked as though it had never moved. Rachael wiped the blood from her mouth with her sleeve and slowly slid down into the tunnel under the Willow. Squinting her eyes, she looked down the dark cavernous tunnel. She wondered how long it was, but it didn't matter. Her brother had to be at the end. She dashed down the tunnel, slide on the wet stone ground, and found herself at the end facing a wooden door.

Gasping for breath, she opened the door and found a stairwell. "Great," she gasped, "more running."

She ran with her little bit of energy up the stairs and found herself in the bedroom Remus was in. She looked over to the bed and saw Remus lying flat on his back, one arm dangling over the side of the bed and the other on his stomach. His eyes were half open, his face covered in small cuts and bruises.

Rachael crept quietly over, not wanting to frighten her brother.

"Remus?" she said quietly. His eyelids flickered. "Remus?" He turned his head slightly to face her. For a moment, it looked as though he couldn't figure out who she was; he was too dazed. He let out a moan to let her know he heard her. "Remus, why are you still here?" He shook his head, but stopped quickly, it hurt too much. "They forgot you! I can't believe it!"

"Stop yelling," Remus moaned.

"Sorry," Rachael whispered. She sat down on the foot of the bed and thought. He couldn't make it back out there by himself. He could hardly stand up and he was too heavy for her to carry. How were they going to get out? Maybe he _could_ walk? "Remus, do you think you could walk? We have to get back to school."

Remus didn't know. "I can try," he moaned. He pushed himself upright, swung his legs over the bed and stood up. He trembled as he stood, but it was good enough.

"Here, I'll help." Rachael went over, took Remus's arm and put it around her shoulders and told him to just lean all his weight on her. Slowly, they made their way out of the building, through the long tunnel, and were once again out on the Hogwarts grounds. Rain was still coming down hard, thunder shook the ground and lightening illuminated the sky.

* * *

"I can't believe I forgot him!" Madam Pomfrey cried as she walked about the Hospital Wing trying to find all the ingredients to make a Cold Curing Potion for Remus, who had contracted a cold in the building the night before. She opened a large cabinet and took out various items, lugged them over to a steaming cauldron and began adding them in.

"Calm down, Poppy. It was your first time dealing with this," Professor McGonagall said soothingly. She was standing beside Remus's bed as he lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling. Rachael was in the bathroom of the hospital wing spitting blood in the sink from when the Willow hit her; Madam Pomfrey was too frantic about her brother to notice her. When she came back, she saw Madam Pomfrey stirring a potion and Professor McGonagall watching.

"Miss Lupin," Professor McGonagall said abruptly.

Rachael turned to see her looking very stern. She couldn't be in trouble, could she? "Yes, Professor?" Rachael answered nervously.

"How come when you found this out you didn't come to me or another staff member?"

"Well... I was nervous and – err - didn't think of that."

"I hope you know that you shouldn't have left the grounds."

"But, Professor, it was for a good reason! You can't take away points for that!"

"Who said I was going to take away points? I was just warning you for the next time."

"Oh, well, okay."

Once Madam Pomfrey was finished with Remus she tended to Rachael. Rachael had a long cut inside her mouth from when the willow hit her. She gave Rachael a potion to drink that would clear the cut up and then she could leave.

"Is my brother going to be okay?" she asked as she was leaving. Remus was lying on one of the hospital beds, his eyes closed, but not sleeping. Madam Pomfrey wanted him to stay the night just to make sure he was okay. The nurse assured her, saying there wasn't anything to worry about. Rachael left the Wing, but she didn't feel like heading back to the common room, even though she needed to, she was covered in mud. She wandered blankly down the cavernous hallways, not paying attention to where she was going.

She was walking down a long torch lit corridor when she heard a voice behind her.

"Oh look, a little piece of Lupin scum."

Rachael turned around to see whom the voice belonged to. Much to her luck, it was Snape. It was bad enough she had to put up with him in potions, but did he have to bother her outside of class to? Snape was smiling grimly, as though he had a nasty little secret up his sleeve, which he probably did. She wouldn't put it past him.

"Oh look what the giant squid barfed up," Rachael answered smartly. "And, my God, it can walk to!"

Snape gave a sarcastic laugh. "Aren't we the smart one?"

"Aren't I? Wish you could be smart, don't you?" Snape's hand slowly traveled to his robe pocket. Rachael noticed this, but pretended she didn't, instead she slowly moved her hand toward her pocket where he wand was resting, in case this got ugly. "But, then again, what would I expect from a Slytherin?"

"You know, it's a shame. Filch won't like having to pick your guts up off the floor."

"He'd enjoy it more than picking up yours!"

With that Snape's wand was raised in the air and he was poised to strike. Rachael didn't react; she wasn't even scared for that matter. Nasty as Snape was, she strongly doubted whether he'd ever hex a girl, he was just trying to be tough. Instead of being scared, she burst out laughing. Snape looked at her utterly perplexed. Did she think of him as a joke? Of course she did. After all, who wouldn't? She knew he wouldn't really hex her, not because she was a girl, but because he knew a teacher would be lurking around somewhere. This was just to give her a scare, a real good one. He gradually advanced on her, his wand steady in their air, never wavering. He pointed his wand right between her eyes, and yet Rachael still did not show any signs of fright. There was a reason for this.

"Severus Snape! What the heck do you think you're doing?" Snape wheeled around to see Professor Lupin sprinting up the corridor behind him, a look of fury blazing on his face. He snatched the wand away from Snape and held it in front of him. "What'd you think you were doing? If I catch you with a wand near my daughter again, you will wish you were never born!" Snape looked at him expressionless. "Now get to your common room before I get your Head of House!"

Without a word or look or sneer of any sort, Snape dashed down the hall and made his way towards his common room.

Professor Lupin rounded on Rachael. She expected him to look worried, but he was still blazing. She knew she shouldn't have expected different, she and her dad had never made up.

"Did you start this?" he asked.

"Why do you think I did?"

"I know you only too well. You would provoke someone into doing that. I've seen you do it before, you are my daughter after all."

Rachael said nothing. Could this be her dad talking to her? The one who had always understood her? Who never questioned her? She couldn't take it.

"Well, you know what, Dad?" she said, walking around him with her hands folded behind her back. "I wouldn't provoke Snape into doing that. He started it. Tell me, when have you seen me do it before? And you know what else, you don't know me as well as you think!" She started to go down the hall, only to be stopped by her dad.

"Rachael, listen-"

"No, why should I listen? I've spent enough of my life listening to everyone else. Now its time for someone to listen to me - I just want you to leave me alone."


	16. Piecing the Past

Chapter Sixteen  
Piecing the Past

Professor Lupin sat at his desk in his office. His feet were propped up on his desk as he was looking at an old album. It was red, leather-bound, and with a gold inscription on the cover that read _The Lupin Family_. He flipped through the pages of pictures, looking at all of them carefully, particularly the ones of his daughter. He noticed she was almost never in a picture alone; she was always with her brother, unless it was a picture of her from the Muggle school they were sent to. Those were the only pictures of her where she was completely alone. In those pictures she was so happy, looking as though she hadn't a care in the world. He knew she and her brother were the best of friends when they were younger. You could almost never catch them apart, but they had been separated for three long years. Maybe that had something to do with this all, he thought as he gazed at a picture of her and Remus from their seventh birthday.

He turned the page again; it was another school picture from when she was in the third grade. She was sitting in front of a giant tree on a wooden stool, hands folded on her lap and looking right at the camera, apparently trying to keep herself from laughing too hard. She had always thought school pictures were foolish. Under that picture was Remus's school photo. He was smiling, but he also didn't like school pictures. He didn't think they were foolish, he just didn't like them.

After those two was a picture from the year before their last birthday together. It had been a quiet birthday, as they hadn't the money to have a big one like they did the year after; business wasn't going well at work. But still, it had been a nice time, both of his kids with him, the family happy. He never thought that a few months later he would be saying goodbye to one of them, to both of them, in fact.

He closed the album and placed it in his desk drawer; he sat up and looked around the room, heaving a great sigh. He wondered if he should ask Remus what was wrong with his sister. But no, Remus was too sick to answer any questions, for today at least. How was he going to handle this? He couldn't talk to his daughter; she would just fly at him and storm out of the room. He had to find out. He knew how…

* * *

He stopped in front of the old orphanage. Looking up through the windows, he could see vaguely into the common room and saw a group of kids sitting by the window. He walked up to the front door and knocked on it. The door opened and he saw a blonde haired, blue-eyed girl, who looked to be Rachael's age, standing in front of him.

"Can I help you, sir?" she asked nervously.

"Yes," he answered kindly. "I need to speak with a – err - oh right, Mrs. Ramben, please?" The girl looked a bit hesitant. Just as Professor Lupin was about to ask again, Mrs. Ramben appeared besides the girl.

"Becky is there a problem?" she asked in her stiff voice. The girl named Becky looked up and pointed to the professor. "Oh, it's you. Your daughter is off at school, you know."

"Yes, I'm aware of that," Professor Lupin answered, sounding a bit agitated. "I needed to speak to you about her."

Looking startled, Mrs. Ramben nodded and stepped aside to let him. He followed her to her office, which was full of loose paperwork at the moment, and sat down as she sat at her desk. She moved aside some papers and folded her hands on the table.

"What did you need to talk to me about?" she asked.

Professor Lupin thought for a moment. There was so much he needed to know, he just didn't know where to start.

"I need to know," he said, "what happened to my daughter here?"

Mrs. Ramben stacked some more papers and began to talk.

"Well your daughter was… how can I describe it? Well, she was different." She said how his daughter and her roommate didn't get along and were always fighting, both verbally and physically. She spoke about how she was always getting detentions and doing some other punishment chore. She talked of the time when she was caught leaving a mouse in Becky's bed, as a way of pay back for Becky leaving a dead rat in Rachael's bed.

Professor Lupin listened intently. He was hanging on every word, looking for something that could help him understand why his daughter was acting like the way she was. He was getting a lot of information about her, but none of it seemed to help. She was always getting into arguements when she was home; it wasn't anything to make her act the way she did.

Then there was his answer. Mrs. Ramben brought up what Rachael had told Remus, the time when she was going to get rid of her problems forever. Professor Lupin listened; horrified at what he was hearing, his daughter had done this? It couldn't have been, but he knew no one would lie about such things; to lie about something like this was a sick, cruel joke.

"After that, she kept close to herself. She didn't talk much for a while, and then she got back to her regular self. That's about all I can tell you."

He was silent for a moment, and then stood up.

"Thank you, Mrs. Ramben," he choked, holding out a hand for her to shake. "I needed to know that. That's all I need, bye." He let himself out and went to the front of the building. He crossed to the side alley and sank down against the wall, burying his face in his hands.

He wished he had never come to the orphanage to find out what was wrong. But he had to otherwise he never would have known. He never would know what he had to do to fix it. He couldn't help but think this entire thing was his fault. Rachael was right, he could have argued better than he did; only he didn't. He had to talk to his daughter.

* * *

"Wait for it…"

"Wait for what?"

"Quiet or we won't be able to hear it."

"Hear what?"

Just then, there was an explosive farting sound coming right from where Snape was sitting. James, Sirius, Peter, Rachael and Lily were sitting in the Great Hall, eating their dinner, while James and Sirius were planning a nice little revenge trick on Snape because he threatened Rachael. Rachael thought the idea was absolutely hilarious, but Lily thought it was horribly mean and didn't want to take part in it.

James and Sirius slapped each other's hands in congratulations and saw Snape jumped in fright of the noise; he didn't know where it was coming from so he just continued eating. He also didn't notice that every time he took a bite into his meal the farting noise came again.

"I like to call it Fart Foods, compliments of James Potter and Sirius Black," Sirius laughed as more noises came from Snape.

"Oh yes, you're very funny," Lily said through gritted teeth. "Real mature."

"What d'you expect?" James said. "You're talking to us after all!" Without a word Lily left the hall. "Right… so… let's hear some more from the Snape Symphony."

* * *

Rachael was sitting in the common room, _Quidditch through the Ages_ open on her lap, but she wasn't reading it. She was staring into the fire, her eyes unfocused. She was thinking about what she had said to her dad. She really made him upset but she just couldn't help what she said; she had meant it. Should she go and apologise to him? She didn't know if he even wanted to talk to her, but she had to try. She glanced at the giant grandfather clock in the corner of the common room, it was only seven o' clock; curfew was in an hour. She had enough time.

She ran over to the portrait hole, about to push it open, but it opened from the outside before she could try. Much to her surprise, standing on the other side was her dad.

"Err… hi?" she said uncertainly.

"Can you come to my office for a minute?" he asked.

Wondering what she could have done now, Rachael followed him to his office. She looked at his desk and saw he was boiling a pot of water and two teacups were placed next to the kettle.

Professor Lupin told her to sit down while he poured some cups of tea for them.

"No, I don't want any," Rachael said as she sank into a chair. He nodded as he poured himself a cup. He sat down opposite of his daughter and took a sip. "So," Rachael said, drumming her fingers on the arm of her chair, "what'd you want to talk to me about?"

"I visited the orphanage today," he said quietly.

"Please don't mention that place."

"I have to, unfortunately. In order for me to understand you, I have to talk about this. After this, I promise I'll never mention it again." Rachael studied her dad for a minute before nodding. He folded his hands on his desk and began to talk. "Well, the woman who works there, Mrs. Ramben, she told me a bit about you when you were there, how you got into fights with your roommate. You would always get detention and one other thing…"

He told her that all of that was new to him; he had never known his daughter to do anything like that. Why did she? Rachael just said she couldn't explain it; she just wasn't herself for the time she was there. She told him how, when she was there, she had to change completely in order to survive. If she had stayed her quiet self she wouldn't have lasted a minute, so she adopted the attitude of a loud person who loved insulting people for no good reason, which was far from her real self.

She didn't like the idea of it, but once she had started acting that way it grew on her. No matter what she did it stayed with her, which was probably why Snape loved to pick on her. She would always try and think of a better comeback than he could.

"But why didn't you just forget about them and act like yourself?"

"If you were there you'd understand why. Becky and all of them were just horrible; I tried being myself for the first few days. It didn't work though. I got a black eye and ended up cleaning the entire place for acting like myself. It wasn't working so I had to change, I didn't want to though."

Her dad did nothing and said nothing; he was simply lost for words.

"Well, this all explains a lot," he muttered finally. "Now I know why you were acting the way you were; you were just frustrated I guess." Rachael nodded. "And I'm sorry I blamed you for the incident with Snape in the hallway earlier, I'm sorry for everything."

Rachael shook her head. "No, I am. I was being stupid; it's not your fault."

"It doesn't matter, just as long as we're not arguing. After all, you've always been my favourite, just don't tell Remus that."

Rachael gave a short laugh.

"I think you should be getting back to Gryffindor Tower, don't want Filch to catch you."

Rachael said good night to her dad and trudged back up to the Portrait of the Fat Lady. She said the password, "Owl Pellets," and went off into the dormitory. She sat down on her bed and leaned on her back. She was glad her dad found everything out. It turned out to help; she and he were friends again.


	17. Is there a test or not?

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Seventeen  
Is There A Test or Not?

Rachael woke the next day, thinking it was a Monday for some odd reason. She looked over her to her clock to discover that it was half past nine. Frantic, she rolled off her bed, landing with a loud and painful thud on the dormitory floor, and proceeded to climb to her feet, but she was tangled up in her beds sheets.

Untangling herself as fast as she could, she jumped up and started to run to the bathroom, after grabbing a pair of robes. Then she realised something. If it was a school day, why were Lily and Alice still sleeping? She crept over to Lily and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Lily?" she whispered.

Lily gave a long moan and rolled over onto her stomach, muttering something about that it was too early to be woken up on a Sunday.

"It's Sunday?"

"Yeah, now leave me alone," Lily answered groggily.

Rachael nodded and went back over to her bed. There was nothing to do now, no reason in going back to sleep since she was already awake. She decided to get dressed and go down to the Great Hall to check if James and Sirius were there. If they weren't there, she'd just eat breakfast and head off to check if Remus was out of the Hospital Wing yet.

Walking through the common room, she saw that the Quidditch team was assembled around the table, talking in hushes. They were probably discussing this year's plays and opponents. The Gryffindor team was comprised of sixth year and captain for three years, Alexandra Lewis, Beater, a pretty brunet who fed off Quidditch; if they canceled Quidditch at Hogwarts she would literally have a heart attack right then and there, which is why the staff avoided doing so. There was one time when she made the team practise night and day for three weeks for a big match with Ravenclaw. The game was canceled due to an injury on the Ravenclaw team and Alexandra started hyperventilating, and had to be rushed to the Hospital Wing.

Alexandra's fellow Beater was Craig Johnson, an African seventh year who had been on the team as a reserve for Billy Braxton, but was moved up when they saw how spectacular he was. Some said the Bludgers cowered in fear of him. One second they would be swerving right towards a Chaser and he would just twist his broom towards the Bludger and it zoomed right past his teammate and into an opponent.

Next there were the three Chasers, the scorers of the games. They take the Quaffle, a large red ball, and shoot it through one of three hops. The Chasers were third year Benjamin Patil, seventh year, Bridget Becker, and fifth year, Malcolm Higgs. They were the most skilled Chasers in the school; they manoeuvered all of their moves perfectly, and never missed a shot.

Then there was Kirk Gamballi, the fourth year Keeper. Tall and large he was, thus he was perfect to block a hoop. Last was the Seeker, Melanie Bigg. The Seeker was the most important. She had to catch the tiny golden snitch and win the one hundred and fifty points for the team. Melanie was extremely talented at Quidditch; she had only lost them a game three times in the four years she had been on the team.

"Hi Rachael," Kirk said, looking up from a long sheet of paper with all sorts of arrows doodled on.

"Hi," Rachael answered back. "First game's next week, right?"

He nodded and said they were going to massacre Hufflepuff.

Rachael climbed through the portrait hole and set off down the passageway to the Hospital Wing. She peered through the small glass window on the door and saw Madam Pomfrey replacing the sheets on some beds.

She knocked on the door and Madam Pomfrey gestured for her to come in.

"Is my brother here?" she asked, poking her head through the door.

"Oh no, I let him go just a few minutes ago. He should be in the Great Hall right about now," Madam Pomfrey said as she fluffed a pillow.

Rachael made her way down to the Great Hall, only to be stopped by Peeves overturning a full to bursting garbage pail on her head, covering her in filth and muck. Luckily, just as Peeves was gliding away, Professor Lupin appeared as he was heading down to the Great Hall to eat and told Peeves the Bloody Baron was going to be hearing about it and he cleaned his daughter up.

In the Great Hall, she saw James, Sirius, Peter and Remus sitting at the very end of the Gryffindor table, closest to the staff. She slid into the seat besides James and listened in on their conversation as she loaded some eggs on her plate.

"Dunno about that," Sirius said as he took a spoonful of oatmeal. "McGonagall isn't going to give us a test when we just had one three days ago."

"Yeah, but Evans said McGonagall said we were going to," James argued. "Besides, we haven't done anything except review the transfiguring of a match box into a tissue box, which was on the first test anyway."

"Why don't you just ask her?" Remus muttered.

"I don't want to go giving her ideas!"

Sirius sniggered in his oatmeal, but quickly changed it into a hacking cough.

"Remus, you feel okay?" Peter asked, peering at Remus.

Rachael took a quick glance at her brother to see his face was pale and had dark circles under his eyes; at least his face wasn't cut up like it was when she found him the other day.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said in a way that made it clear this wasn't a topic to discuss.

"But-"

"He said he's fine!" Rachael said for him, she wasn't going to let Peter press her brother about this subject anymore than he already did.

They spent the rest of their breakfast debating about whether or not they were going to have a Transfiguration test. James was still fretting about having one. But the only reason he thought they were going to have one was because he heard Lily telling Alice they were. Other than that, he had no other proof. Sirius, Remus, Peter and Rachael said they weren't going to have one and he had nothing to worry about.

Besides, James had panicked the last time they had a test in Professor McGonagall's class. He hadn't studied, unless you called playing Exploding Snap studying, and ended up blowing up the matchbox he was supposed to be transfiguring into a tissue box.

"Yep, I've never seen a box go up in flames like that!" Remus joked.

"Oh shut up!" James laughed as he flicked a piece of bacon in Remus's face.

"Well, you couldn't exactly say you were studying either, Remus," Rachael said.

"I studied!"

"Yeah you did... a half hour before class. You spent all night making a rubber rat float into our dormitory."

"Well, I was practising my Charms, Flitwick would be proud. I passed anyway."


	18. Close Call

Chapter Eighteen  
Close Call

During the next few weeks there wasn't much going on that was worth remembering, with the exception of Peeves setting off ten cases of Filbuster's Fireworks in the Slytherin common room. It was so full of smoke that you couldn't see your nose in front of your face.

"Even Snape with that big honker couldn't see it," Sirius joked as they walked past Snape the day after the incident. But today all the students were looking forward to the Halloween Feast. Rachael, Lily, Remus, Sirius, James and Peter walked past the Great Hall on Halloween morning and smelt pumpkin wafting into the Entrance Hall. They peered in and saw large flocks of live bats swooping up and down and circling around the floating candles and large pumpkins on each side of the staff table.

None of the first years could think of anything else other than the feast. Being that it was their first one, it was guaranteed to be the best. James had heard Nearly Headless Nick was to do a reenactment of his execution with the Bloody Baron as his executioner. The Fat Friar and the Grey Lady were supposed to be working on a singing duet, Sirius heard. Rachael had heard the same rumor from Alexandra Lewis; she had told her that it was supposed to be one of the hits from the Weird Sisters.

As they were sitting in Transfiguration, trying to transfigure a pumpkin into an apple, Professor McGonagall noticed that clearly all the first years' minds were elsewhere and not in her class. So, as a Halloween treat, she let them off work for the rest of class, something that was unheard of in her classroom.

* * *

"Watch out, here come the bats again," Remus pointed out as a swarm of bats swooped over them as they ducked their heads.

All the students were gathered in the Great Hall for the Halloween Feast. All of the tables were covered in candy treats. Every single person was suddenly ravenous, grabbing every bit of candy within reach of them. Chatter was lively, all the students anticipating the ghost acts, which were always spectacular.

"Those bats have been circling over us for ages!" Sirius exaggerated as he attempted to catch one in flight. "Why do they keep doing it?"

"'Cause they love you so much, Sirius!" James joked as he bit into a candy apple.

"Wouldn't that scare them away?" Remus muttered innocently.

Sirius gave Remus a shove in the shoulder. "Well they haven't seen you yet, have they? If they did, they'd be in China now."

Rachael was sitting opposite of Peter, next to Lily, as they talked about the latest potions accident, this one involving a Slytherin and a mutated Colour Changing Potion. The details are far too gruesome, but that just makes it more fun to write!

Class started out normal enough, normal meaning the professor putting down the Gryffindors, making cruel remarks about their work, praising the Slytherins, so normal enough for a class with Slytherins, that is. Yet again, Rachael was paired with Snape. She had pleaded one too many times with Professor Binstom to have her partner changed (James, Sirius, Remus, Peter and Lily also contributed to the pleading saying that being paired with Snape was a form of cruel and unusual torture… big mistake to do that… ten points were deducted from Gryffindor).

So, after a long arguement with Snape about how many rose thorns they should add, Snape decided to add just a thorn less, thinking it would be a nice little joke he could blame on Rachael. But the result was far less exciting than he thought it would be. First off, when mixing rose thorns and daisy roots you already have to be extremely careful because the slightest fault in the mixing causes terrible results. Rachael could tell you that.

Nothing seemed unusual with the potion, aside from the fact that the boiling was twice as fast as it should have been, but it was still relatively undetectable. So, as Snape went over to check the blackboard to make sure they were doing everything else right, Rachael continued stirring the potion to make sure all the potions were boiling equally, something started to smell. It was an odd sort of stench, hard to tell, sort of a mixture of rotten eggs, old meat, or (if you please) dirty underwear. Everyone in the room starting gagging and fanning their noses in attempt to block out the choking smell.

Assuming it was something coming from out in the hall, everyone resumed their normal working pace, thinking nothing of the nauseating stink. Another few minutes passed and Rachael began to notice the potion becoming a light blue colour instead of the blood red colour it should have been. When she pointed it out to Snape, he simply ignored her. Trying to figure out what she could have possibly done wrong, Rachael wandered mindlessly away from her table reading the instructions, only to be brought abruptly back to reality by a loud boom and screech. She wheeled around to see blue goop all over the dungeon floors, all over students' shoes, on people's robes, on the desks, everywhere. But mostly on Snape, who was now so blue he could have been the Ravenclaw mascot.

Funny though it was at the moment, it wasn't so once she was being told off by Binstom for something she didn't do.

* * *

"Well, it _was_ pretty funny," Lily said, taking a slab of Honeyduke's Chocolate off one of the golden platters in front of her. "Snape… blue… it's just funny!"

"Well, yeah, the ugly git got even uglier!" Rachael laughed as she peered over at the Slytherin table to see Snape looking highly disgruntled, which was not surprising. He hated anything fun so why would he enjoy the Halloween Feast?

"Hey, Remus, you feel okay?" she heard Peter ask.

Quickly, Rachael turned her head to see what they were talking about. Then she remembered the full moon was the next night. Luckily, Remus quickly said he felt all right. But he didn't look it, his face was incredibly pale, but fortunately he was feeling fine.

The Halloween Feast was a huge success; everyone left there satisfied, even the Slytherins couldn't deny it had been fun. Nearly Headless Nick had a spectacular act. He and the Bloody Baron managed to scrounge up a fake axe. The Bloody Baron found a thick black mask with eyeholes cut out and acted as Nearly Headless Nick's executioner, while they reenacted his execution. It was pretty gruesome, but undeniably the best.

The Fat Friar and the Grey Lady tried doing a duet, but it was cut short by Peeves, feeling suddenly reckless, bringing down a chandelier or two in the Entrance Hall and all the teachers and ghosts went out to try and fix the mess.

As the first years made their way up to Gryffindor Tower they looked in on the mess and saw Professor Flitwick attempting some charms to try and mend the chandeliers. James, Sirius, Peter and Lily all went to bed straightaway when they got up to the common room, but Rachael wasn't feeling tired and neither was Remus.

"I'd go to sleep, if I were you," Rachael said to Remus as she watched her friends' feet retreat up the steps leading to the dormitory. "Full moon, you know," she said in a whisper to make sure she was unheard.

Remus shook his head and sat down on one of the squashy armchairs. "I'm used to it," he said offhandedly. He tried looking for something funny to talk about. "James and Sirius are planning a prank on the Slytherins again."

"About time," Rachael laughed. "Last one they pulled was the Fart Foods, smelly, but effective."

"Yeah, this one's going to be The Amazing, Walking, Talking Attachable Nose the size of a dungbomb."

"Gee I wonder what that's for…"

Remus laughed. "No clue," he said innocently. "But I'm going to miss it, like I missed the first."

"Oh, right… full moon. Don't worry, there'll be plenty more pranks before we graduate."

"Yeah. I'm going to go to bed right now, see you in the morning."

"Guess I'll go too."

They trudged up the winding staircase and went to their dormitories. As Rachael was walking into the girls' dormitory she heard Lily from behind her.

"Full moon, aye?"

Rachael's eyes widened as she spun around and saw Lily glaring at her, hands on hips, stern and curious, waiting for an explanation.

"F-f-full moon? What're you talking about?" Rachael stuttered, trying to remain calm, but failing in the attempt.

"I heard you," Lily said stalking towards Rachael. "_Full_ moon! What's going on?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes you do."

"No I don't!"

"You do!"

Rachael couldn't take it; she whipped her wand out of her pocket and held it towards Lily. "Listen, you weren't supposed to hear that! So just forget about it!"

"No I won't."

"Then I'm going to make you forget about it. _Obliviate_!"


	19. Any Other Way

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen  
Any Other Way

For all the next day, Rachael couldn't even look at Lily. She felt so guilty about erasing her memory from the night before, but she just panicked and did the first thing that came to mind. Of course Lily was unaware anything had happened because of the charm, but still…

Anyway, Sirius and James's prank was, as usual, a hit in the Great Hall during lunch. It started normal enough, they were just talking about the homework Professor Sprout gave them and how it would take ages to do. Their Imp Bells were getting feverish due to the increasingly cold weather and it was their homework to research a cure for the common cold for Imp Bells.

"What does she think we are?" Sirius whined. "Rocket Scientists?"

So, as they were discussing the assignment, they heard a loud squishing sound and all heads turned towards the Slytherin table, because that was always the sight of pranks, from every house. There was a large nose, which actually _was_ the size of a dungbomb, just as Remus had said, clamping itself tight on Snape's real nose. He couldn't get it off until James lifted the curse.

Of course Rachael had to cover for Remus's disappearance again. This time he told her to tell them that he was needed to help their mum with something terribly important. _He needs better excuses_, Rachael thought miserably as she listened to Professor Binns drone on about the Giants in History of Magic.

James, Sirius and Peter were beginning to get suspicious of Remus's disappearance, but they hadn't said anything about it, yet. Lily, Alice and Frank were easy enough for Rachael to fool with excuses. But James, Sirius and Peter were Remus's best friends, they weren't so easy. They would often try and seek Remus out in the castle just to make sure he wasn't anywhere. Whenever this happened, Rachael had to beat them to the Hospital Wing and tell Madam Pomfrey about it so she could keep Remus out of sight.

Only this time Rachael was sure they had seen him. She didn't know why, but they were acting as if they had some secret. Then again, it might have just been some new prank of theirs, since their last one went off with a bang. But if it were a prank they would be more open about it with her. They always told her their plans for pranks and never kept them secret from her. It was really starting to bug her now…

* * *

James, Sirius and Peter were sitting in the library with ten books all about magical creatures scattered out on the table all of them open to the same topic - werewolves. They were becoming wary, just as Rachael thought. They were following Remus's symptoms. It was December now and each month Remus would just vanish and each excuse his sister gave was just as pathetic as the last. Besides, one of them was their grandfather died and she wasn't allowed to go to the funeral, just because.

"So far we've got that every month on a full moon a man bitten by a werewolf will transform into one. Obviously, _that_ wasn't hard," Sirius grumbled, leaning his head on his hand. "You find anything, James?"

James had his nose dug into Mystical Creatures of Our World. He wasn't having much luck. All it said about werewolves was that they were bloodthirsty beasts bent on destruction. He shook his head, closed the book he was looking at and picked up another.

"What about you, Peter?" Sirius said, nodding his head at Peter, who had just picked up an entire book solely about werewolves. The only problem with this book was it wasn't an informational book. It was just a book about a boy who had been bitten and how he lived his life after that. It did provide good evidence, though.

"Here's something!" Peter said suddenly. He put the book on the desk and the three leaned forward while Peter read. "'_The doctor told them to make sure the scar was never seen, as it was such a distinct mark, the same on all who have been bitten. The mark was two round bite marks and two square shaped marks in between which never faded, despite how long it had been since the bite was first placed_.'"

"But I've never seen a bite mark like that on him," James said, picking up the book and looking at the sketch of the marks in the book.

"Maybe it's just somewhere we can't see," Sirius offered. James gave him a weird look. "Not like _that_!"

"Come on," James said, standing up to collect all the books. "Let's bring these back to the common room, we can look at 'em there."

They collected all the books and checked them out from Madam Pince, the school librarian, and headed up the Gryffindor Tower. As they were walking to the portrait of the Fat Lady, they continued the subject.

"You know, I've noticed that he always disappears on a full moon," Sirius said, stooping down to pick up a book he dropped. He stood back up. "And he always looks really pale around then."

"Yeah I noticed that too when I was doing the Astrology homework. I remember one time when we had to chart down all the full moons and he did it in a second. I just thought it was because he was really good at that stuff, but it can't be."

They approached the Fat Lady, gave the password (Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans) and entered a nearly empty common room. There were only two fourth years in the common room, but they were in a far corner of the room talking quietly with each other. There was also another person lying on the couch sleeping. They paid no attention to them and went over to the table. They scattered all the books down and began their research yet again.

"Says here that a werewolf always looks tired," Sirius said, looking at page fifty-six of So You Want To Track Mystical Creatures But Don't Know What to Look For? "It says even the slightest sign of weariness, but not sickness, can be a sign of a werewolf. Remus does always look like he's tired, but he never acts like it. He only acts like he's tired after he gets back from 'visiting' someone."

"Yeah, but look here." James leaned over and pointed to the sentence under the one Sirius was looking at. "It says that acting tired doesn't matter, just the fact that they look tired when they're really not. That's Remus."

"Speaking of Remus," Peter said suddenly. "He's right over there."

Sirius and James turned to see that Peter was pointing to the student who was sleeping on the couch. It was Remus. He had gotten to sleep late the night before because he was helping Professor McGonagall with something for the Transfiguration class. He didn't get back to the dormitory until three in the morning; he was practically falling asleep in class.

Remus was lying flat on his back, one hand lying on his stomach, the other dangling over the side of the couch. His bangs were slid sideways, where they revealed his scar from being bitten, but his friends didn't notice at first.

"Well, he _does_ look tired," Peter said.

"Yeah, but that's because he was up late last night," James retorted.

Sirius stood up and walked over to attempt to wake Remus up, but stopped himself, not because he didn't want to wake him up but because he saw the scar. "What's that?" he said, leaning over the back of the couch and peering at the scar on Remus's forehead.

James and Peter looked at each other curiously and walked over to see what Sirius was looking at. Right under Remus's hairline were four little marks, marks that looked remarkably like the ones they had seen in the book Peter was looking at.

"Peter," James said nervously, looking at Peter. "Go get the book you had before."

Doing as he was told, Peter snatched book off the table and flipped open to the page they were looking at in the library. He handed the book to James and James looked from the book to Remus, book to Remus, and then rested his eyes on the book.

"It's just like the one in the book," James said, wide eyed, unable to remove his gaze from the scar. "Everything fits… the scar… the symptoms… everything!"

"Remus is a werewolf."

They didn't know what to say, they couldn't say anything. What would Remus say if he knew they found out? He didn't want anyone to find out. If he did he just would've told them right out the first time he met them.

The portrait door opened and in walked Rachael, coming up from the Great Hall. She ran past them, up to her dormitory, and came down a second later with her Herbology book. She went over to the table, about to set her book down, but stopped when she saw all the books scattered across it. She looked at all the books curiously. Her eyes widened a bit, but she remained calm. She turned to the three boys.

"Been researching werewolves?" she said casually, moving some books so she could start her homework. The boys nodded. "Why? My dad didn't make us do that for homework."

"We know he didn't," Sirius said quietly. The two fourth years got up and went down to the Great Hall; they didn't have to whisper now.

"Then why do you have-" she stopped to count all the books, "fifteen books about werewolves on the table? Is playing pranks getting so boring you have to resort to reading?"

"No it's just…" They couldn't tell her they knew. They didn't want her to find out and they couldn't let Remus know either. But they couldn't keep this from her. "Is there something Remus hasn't been telling us?"

Rachael's face remained neutral. She acted as though there wasn't anything she should be nervous about.

"No," she said simply. "Why would he have anything to hide from his best friends? I've got to start my homework." She said this all with an air of finality, as in this conversation is closed, don't bother me.

* * *

"Merry Christmas!"

It was Christmas morning and it was only James, Sirius, Peter, Remus and Rachael in all of Gryffindor Tower. Everyone else was gone. They were sitting in the common room with presents scattered all about the floor near the giant Christmas tree.

"Let's see, what's this?" Remus wondered aloud as he ripped open a brightly coloured package. He pulled the card out and read it aloud:

_Dear Remus,_

_Have a merry, merry Christmas my favourite child… my only child_

_Love Mum._

He opened the package and pulled out a blue jumper with a golden R embroidered in. He held it in front of him, admiring it for a split second with a quick glance at his sister, who was looking at it, trying not to say anything. Her mum hadn't given her a Christmas present in four years. She was used to it by now but it still hurt when she saw Remus's gift.

She had gotten a book about all the different Quidditch teams from James, a red jumper with the Gryffindor Lion sewn in from her dad, a bag of gags from Sirius, a model Quidditch stadium from Remus, a journal from Lily and a deck of wizard cards from Peter. She loved all her presents, but it seemed so miniscule compared to her friends' and brother's.

"Hey," James said, suddenly noticing something. "Your mum didn't give you a gift."

Without saying anything Rachael got up and went up to her dormitory.

James looked at Remus. "Did I say something wrong?" he asked, looking a bit guilty.

"No it's just… just don't mention anything like that in front of her."

* * *

Christmas was very fun. Rachael felt better than she had in the morning when James pointed out her mother didn't even bother to wish her a Merry Christmas. There was the Christmas Feast in the Great Hall. All of the Professors were there talking happily and sharing Christmas crackers with the few students who stayed at castle for the holidays.

"Having a good time?" Professor Lupin said, taking the vacant seat next to his daughter. They nodded and Remus and Rachael thanked their dad for the gifts he gave them. "Oh yes, Rachael, come here for a minute."

He led his daughter out into the Entrance Hall and gave her thirty gold galleons.

"Why are you giving me all this money?" she asked, utterly surprised. Her dad was never so loose with money, no matter who he was dealing with.

"To make up for your mother's lack of holiday welcome," he said, a flash of anger in his eyes.

"It doesn't matter, I don't care."

She tried giving him the money back but he wouldn't have it.

"You're my daughter and I won't let my wife treat you horribly. Now just take it and think of it as four years of missing Christmas and birthday presents."

* * *

Later that night Rachael, James, and Peter were all in the common room. The three boys needed to ask Rachael if what they were thinking was, in fact, true. They just had to know and couldn't wait any longer. They made sure Remus was fast asleep before they began to talk.

"You know he snores really loud?" Sirius said as he came down from the dormitory. "How could you stand it?" he said turning to Rachael.

"Separate rooms," she answered. "So, what'd you want to talk to me about?"

They found it very hard to word. How were they going to say 'so is Remus a werewolf?' That was a little too direct.

"We… we need to… ask you something," James said, looking at his feet.

"What?"

"It's kinda hard to ask."

"Just ask."

"Okay. Remember when you saw all the books about werewolves we were looking at?" Rachael nodded. "We actually were trying… we were… we were trying to figure out if Remus was a werewolf."

They expected Rachael to deny, and she half expected herself to deny it as well but, for some odd reason, she couldn't. It would help Remus if his friends knew, she wasn't going to lie. "And…?"

"We saw that he always had to 'visit' someone on a full moon. He always looks tired and he has the scar." Rachael nodded her head. "Is he?"

Should she tell them? It seemed wrong, but it would help. She wasn't sure. But they probably already knew. Still… she never would give Remus's secret away, just as he never gave away hers. She was going to tell, even though she knew he wouldn't like it. If they were really his friends they wouldn't care.

"He is," she said quietly.

James, Sirius and Peter looked at each other with expressions of triumph, concern and confusion.

Sirius was the first to speak after. "How?" he stuttered. "H-how'd it happen?"

"Well, we were eight; we lived in this little village that had a large bit of woods. No one really knew what was in it; me and Remus didn't when we went in."

"Why'd you go in in the first place?" Sirius cut in.

"We were supposed to be getting groceries for our mum, we never did in fact. We were going through the forest to get home. We were in there for a while and kept hearing growling sounds. We tried to get out quickly but a werewolf found us. It chased us through the forest. Remus had fallen behind me and I turned back to see where he was. He was really far behind. I started to go back for him, but he said to keep moving. He was catching up so I knew he'd catch up, but when I turned around I ran straight into a tree.

"I dunno how long it had been after that when I woke up. Me and Remus were in St. Mungo's. One of the Healers, Griemer, and my mum were talking, saying if it was bad. I didn't know what they were talking about, so I just listened and then I noticed Remus lying in the bed next to me. He was sleeping and I saw a bandage on his forehead, so something had happened.

"My mum saw that I was awake and first she asked me nicely what happened in the forest, but I didn't know. She got a bit mad and yelled that I was lying. She woke up Remus and he said he'd tell. First my mum wouldn't let him, but he did anyway. After I ran into the tree the werewolf closed in on him, after he tripped over a stick. He couldn't get away in time, the werewolf bit him. When he was done, she was really mad. She yelled a lot, more than I've ever heard anyone yell. Remus was a werewolf and she said it was my fault."

Sirius, James and Peter were hanging on her every word.

"What was it like after that?" James asked anxiously. "How'd Remus handle it?"

"Well, I really don't know I barely saw him when we got home. He was locked in his room for the first full moon, but I heard everything. As a first punishment, I had to sit outside Remus's door and listen to his transformation. It was horrible. I can't even explain how bad it sounded; Remus probably can't even explain how horrible it felt."

"Wait," Peter said suddenly. "What d'you mean by 'first' punishment?"

Rachael shifted uneasily. She really didn't want to tell them where her parents had sent her, but, then again, she had told Remus's secret. It would only be fair if she told her own, despite how much she wanted to take it with her to the grave.

"My other punishment was… it was… my parents disowned me! They sent me to an orphanage!" The boys were quiet. She went on. "My mum was so mad she wanted to make it that I wasn't in the family anymore. They sent me to this stupid orphanage!"

"That's horrible," Peter muttered.

"Yeah it is. On the Hogwarts Express was the first time I'd seen my brother in years. I don't know how he handled those full moons; I don't know how he stood it. I hadn't seen him in years."

"Lucky for you, you didn't have to live with Mum," Remus's voice said from upstairs.

Rachael, James, Sirius and Peter all looked up to see Remus leaning over the banister and peering at them.

"How long've you been up there?" Rachael asked at once.

"Oh, since you said I was a werewolf," he answered offhandedly, looking unperturbed.

Rachael's face turned unnaturally red. James, Sirius and Peter all wore guilty looks.

"Look, Remus, I-"

"It doesn't matter," he said quickly, cutting his sister off. He walked down the stairs and stood at the landing. "They'd've found out anyway." He sat on the bottom step. "So…?"

"So?" Sirius repeated.

"I'm waiting. Tell me, how're you going to stop being my friends? Cold shoulder or just tell me outright?" He looked at them expectantly, waiting for the blow, as it always came when his wizard friends found out, not that he had many to begin with. The ones he had panicked when they found out and never spoke to him again or just said he was mental and stalked off. He was no stranger to this, so he wouldn't mind so much, would he?

"You're kidding, right?" James asked incredulously.

Remus shook his head. "You don't want to be caught hanging around a werewolf. Just say it and let me get on with my life."

"Okay, I'll say it then. First: you're a werewolf, big deal. Second: we're not going to stop being your friends just because you're a werewolf."

All the while James spoke, Remus kept his eyes shut, as though he was protecting himself from a physical blow. When James finished he opened his eyes and heaved a great, sorrowful, sigh.

"See," he said mournfully. "I knew it, you guys hate – wait – what?"

Sirius gave a quick laugh. "Why are we going to stop hanging around you? You're a werewolf, big deal!"

"Well everyone I knew that knew what I was was afraid of me so I figured if I never told anyone what I was then I'd be safe and have a normal life with friends."

"Well we're not scared," said Peter sincerely.

"Yeah, actually I think its better now that we know," Sirius agreed.

"You being a werewolf doesn't matter to us. It's a tough idea to swallow though, but nothings going to change. You're still our friend." James heaved a great sigh and looked up at the giant grandfather clock. "I think I'm going to go get some sleep, you guys coming?"

Sirius and Peter got up and followed after bidding Remus and Rachael goodnight.

Rachael turned to her brother who was still sitting on the bottom step. "You're not mad at me, are you?" she asked worriedly. She had given Remus her word that she would never tell anyone his secret if he never told her secret. She had gone back on her word.

"No," he answered simply. "I'm glad you did. Thanks."

"You're welcome, I guess. But now we're even; they know both our secrets."

Remus smiled. "Yeah. You never did tell me, what'd you tell the people there why you were there anyway?"

"Just told them the truth," Remus's eyes widened. "No I didn't tell them what you are. I just said I did something wrong and was paying for it. Come on, if McGonagall or someone comes in here they'll catch us awake, lets just go to bed."

The two twins went up to their dorms and got ready for bed. As Rachael crawled into her bed, she thought back to what was said, that Remus being a werewolf didn't matter to them. That was what a true friend would say. She was happy for Remus to have found such great friends. She wouldn't have it any other way for him.


	20. Of Home and Pigs?

Chapter Twenty  
Of Home and Pigs?

"Rise and shine!" rang James's voice throughout the boys' dormitory.

Sirius, Remus and Peter raised their heads a fraction of an inch off their pillows and looked at James groggily and annoyed.

"How 'bout," Sirius moaned, "fall and sleep!"

"No way! Wake up people!"

"Why're you in such a hurry to get up?" Remus asked, his voice muffled due to the fact that his head was in his pillow in a last ditch attempt to get back to sleep.

James went over and pulled the bed sheets off Peter and pulled the shades off the window to let the morning sunlight pour into the room. He then went over to both Sirius and Remus in turn and yanked their blankets off them. Sirius quickly sat up and pulled them back from James and covered his whole body with them.

"What's wrong with you?" Peter muttered, standing up now and looking at James suspiciously.

"Can't I be happy in the morning?"

Remus, Sirius (sticking his head out from his sheets) and Peter looked at each other and then at James. "No!"

"Well as long as you're up…!" James indicated.

The other three gave each other exasperated looks and began to dress.

* * *

"We had a nice wakeup call this morning," Remus said as they all sat at the nearly empty Gryffindor table. It was the third to last day of the holiday break so they were all making the best of the practically empty castle. James sniggered into his oatmeal as he thought about his nice little alarm.

"Let me guess," Rachael said, setting down her spoon and looking at her brother and friends. "James woke you guys up?"

"Yeah," Sirius, Remus and Peter said at once. James smiled innocently, but couldn't get the gleam out of his eye. "Didn't you do that once before?" Sirius asked James.

James's eyes went reminiscent. "Yeah I did… I think it was sometime in October… but much better… dropped a nice cup of cold water on each of your heads."

"Nice how you're such a morning person," Rachael muttered.

* * *

They spent a good portion of the afternoon out on the grounds having a snowball fight, which was much fun. It was Sirius and James verse Remus and Rachael, while Peter sat on the sidelines constructing mountains of snowballs for them to hurl at each other. Ravenclaw, Alex Anderson, who had stayed behind at Hogwarts for the break, joined them later. With the arrival of him they were able to have even teams so Alex stood on Remus and Rachael's team while Peter rivaled against them with James and Sirius.

Afterwards, covered from head to foot in bitter cold snow, they trudged back up to the castle to warm up. Rachael, Remus, Sirius, James and Peter sat huddled around the common room fire that evening, trying to stay warm in the deathly cold common room. They talked, through chattering teeth, about the fact that they found it bizarre that Sirius wanted a flying motorcycle.

"What would you need it for?" James asked incredulously as he rubbed his hands together in a feeble attempt to keep them warm.

"To fly," Sirius answered simply.

They all gave him a look as if to say 'obviously.'

"Yeah but that's why there's broomsticks, Sirius," Remus pointed out.

Sirius looked thoughtful for a moment but quickly dismissed the subject. They continued on the topic of the last Quidditch match, which had proved in victory for Gryffindor. Of course it wasn't very surprising that they won, as they were playing Hufflepuff and they were no match.

It started off with the usual releasing of the four game balls, first the two Bludgers, followed closely by the miniscule Golden Snitch, which quickly fluttered off to the opposite end of the pitch, and lastly the red Quaffle, which started the game. Gryffindor immediately took possession of the Quaffle. Gryffindor Chaser, Bridget Becker, soared stealthily through the other thirteen players in the air, weaving her way through the Beaters and other Chasers and stopped right in front of the Hufflepuff goalpost. She hovered in the air for a mere split second, faked to the left but quickly sped to the right and threw the Quaffle straight through the centre goal, making the score ten to zero in Gryffindor's favour.

Hufflepuff Chaser Lenny Flant took the Quaffle straight after the score and flew speedily across the pitch, dodging a Bludger hit by Gryffindor Beater Craig Johnson. Lenny took aim, shot the Quaffle towards the left hoop but the Keeper, Kirk Gamballi, caught it at the tips of his fingers and sent it hurtling back towards his teammate Malcolm Higgs and he went off back towards Hufflepuff. After Gryffindor scored a second time Gryffindor's Seeker, Melanie Bigg snatched the Snitch right near the changing room entrance and the game was over. 170-0 Gryffindor.

"That was hilarious when one of the Hufflepuff Beaters hit the Bludger towards the Slytherins by mistake," Rachael reminisced as she looked into the fire.

The boys laughed.

"Yeah, did you see Snape?" Sirius added, his eyes sparkling with glee at the thought.

"Yep, one second he's sitting there watching the game like a normal person… well normal as he gets… and then a Bludger comes hurtling at him and his gang of Slytherins!" James laughed.

Peter gave a quick laugh. "Didn't it get one of them?" he asked.

"Yeah, it slugged Peter Bullstrode right in the face," Remus answered, hardly able to contain his joy at the thought. "Sent him to the hospital wing for at least a week."

They went to bed extremely late that night, as they had been talking so long. Then they got locked in an intense match of Exploding Snap in which Rachael, James, Sirius and Peter attempted to finally beat Remus's winning streak. But their efforts proved futile in the end. Remus took the prize, which was a mountain of Chocolate Frogs.

* * *

Two days later the break concluded and the students who had ventured home for the holidays returned, much to the five friend's dismay. They had enjoyed the empty Gryffindor Tower and having almost the entire castle to themselves, with the exception of the staff. But unfortunately as James put it, "in the words of the old, all good things must end." This didn't help much; it only brought Remus to ask him if that was true how come he heard James complaining about the end of the break just the night before.

They sat in Transfiguration the day classes resumed, trying with all their might to transfigure a tissue box into a jewellry box identical to the one on Professor McGonagall's desk. It was silver, with vine designs on the sides and on the lid a rose twisting around a blank nameplate. It didn't look too hard to reassemble at first, but they soon realised they would be there an awfully long time attempting to complete their task. James was stabbing his wand at the tissue box repeatedly, muttering the spell so quickly and incoherently that the only thing he achieved were silver sparks shooting out of his wand and showering the student in front of him. Sirius was twirling his wand in his fingers, looking at his box, apparently he seemed to have given up but he still tried occasionally to see that maybe if he waited long enough he would actually get the transfiguration right. Finally, after eight tries, Sirius managed it and earned Gryffindor five points from a satisfied Professor McGonagall. Remus and Rachael got their box to transfigure after seven tries and James managed his right after Sirius. Lily was having the most difficulty so James offered to help her, grinning from ear to ear when she reluctantly accepted his offer. Peter managed nothing to mutate his box so it looked like a melted rubber ball.

"That thing smelled," Lily commented as she and Rachael walked out of Transfiguration with the boys trailing behind them.

"I've smelt worse," Rachael said reminiscently as she remembered back at the orphanage when some of the misbehaved boys got the brilliant idea to fart in all of the girls' water bottles, cap them to keep the smell in. And then they proceeded to walk about the building and opening them in front of all of the girls and adults.

Rachael made a face at the thought. "Once you've smelt that you'll never smell anything worse."

* * *

They sat in the Great Hall that night as dinner went on. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were going on about the detention James and Sirius had gotten because Snape spilled their cauldrons over in Potions class and blamed it entirely on the two boys. Of course, being that the professor was head of Slytherin, he sided with Snape and gave them detention that night to scrub the dungeon floors with nothing more than a single toothbrush and a bucket of water.

"Snape's always given me a hard time," Sirius muttered into his stew.

"You knew Snape before Hogwarts?" Rachael asked, remembering about her encounter with Snape and Sirius had known immediately who it was.

Sirius nodded.

"I met him once before at Diagon Alley," he said thoughtfully, a look of pure disgust on his face. "My dear, dear mother wanted to go into Knockturn Alley so I stayed behind and looked around Diagon Alley. As I was walking past the robe shop I saw an ugly patch of greasy hair coming out of the store with some new robes. 'Sirius Black?' he asked. I nodded; it wasn't surprising he knew who I was, as his parents were probably scum like mine… so he said his name was Severus Snape.

"He started saying he was going to Hogwarts the year after that one. I asked what house he wanted to be in and he said Slytherin. I didn't say anything about it at first until he asked me what house I wanted to be in, I said Gryffindor. 'You want to be with those mudbloods?' And so… let's just say it wasn't pretty after that." He made a squelching noise and stamped his foot on the floor.

"Come on," James said miserably, checking his watch and eyeing the doors into the Great Hall. "Let's go down to the dungeons now." Sirius nodded glumly and they bid the others goodbye as they hurried down to their detention.

Remus and Rachael walked out on the grounds towards Hagrid's cabin out on the outskirts of the Forbidden Forest. Lily had to go and help Peter with his Charms homework otherwise she might've joined them. They were talking about devising ways to cause destruction during their last day of Potions for the year… even though it was far off… one could only dream.

"Well we could always try and burn a hole right through the dungeon floor," Remus suggested as he broke into a sort of jog as they went down the slope to Hagrid's.

"Yeah, then if we get it deep enough we could shove the stupid teacher in!"

Remus laughed. They continued down the lawn to Hagrid's cabin and saw him in the small pumpkin patch behind his cabin. He was sprinkling some pumpkin feed around the patch, preparing them to grow for the spring. Remus and Rachael walked up behind him, inspecting the pumpkins from behind his back.

"Nice, aren't they?" Hagrid said, so suddenly that the twins jumped, not knowing that he knew they were there. He turned to look at them over his shoulder and they nodded, eyeing the small pumpkin sprouts.

"They are," Remus said. "How long've you been growing them?"

"Oh a month er so," he answered, stooping down to his knees and sprinkling a pumpkin with feed.

"They're pretty good for a month," said Rachael, nodding approvingly and stooping down next to Hagrid to look at a pumpkin that was roughly the size of her head. "Bet they'll be as big as your hut by the time next Halloween rolls around."

Hagrid laughed. "That'd be summat, wouldn't it?" He rubbed the surface of the pumpkin, put his hands on his knees and heaved himself up. He ran a finger through his tangled beard. "So, how's class bin?"

"Pretty good," Remus said, walking around the pumpkin, observing the pumpkins. "Teacher's are already preparing us for our finals!"

"They're not for five months!" Rachael added.

"Well they like ter get yeh prepared," Hagrid said, looking at them sympathetically. He remembered that all the students got into frenzies about the finals; they need to pass them in order to pass on to their next year. "But they're nuttin to worry 'bout, can't be too hard, can they? Otherwise none of yeh would pass!"

"Yeah, right." Remus looked up to see a faded crescent moon in the sky; they'd have to heading back up to the castle soon.

"We've got to be getting back up to school," he said. Hagrid nodded.

"Right, see yeh tomorrow I guess."

"Bye," they both said and turned to head back up to school.

As they were walking back up to the castle Rachael began thinking about the approaching summer. Though it was five months away, she didn't know how quickly these months would go by. She wondered if she would have to go back to the orphanage. Since her dad knew how horrible that place was, maybe he wouldn't let her go back. Maybe she could stay with him; after all he was her dad. Why shouldn't she be allowed to stay with him? She had no doubt in her mind that that was what he wanted for her.

But then she wondered… did her dad stay at the castle during the summer holiday? He had his office where he lived during the school year so did that mean he stayed during the entire year? Did he have his own home? It did seem a little absurd to have two separate homes. But, then again, she did too, although one she would never consider a home. Her homes were the orphanage and Hogwarts. The orphanage… she didn't call it a home. It was just where she lived when she got disowned. She could never say it was her home. The people there, they weren't her family, they were just people, and more than half of them shouldn't be called people. They never treated her right… she would bet her life savings that they never would.

Hogwarts was different… here people cared about her… they cared that she existed. They didn't shove her aside and pretend that she was just there to take up space. She was appreciated here and had family… Remus and her dad… they were the only family she had. She had no mother; no mother would disown her child for an accident she couldn't control. Her fists clenched in anger as she thought about her mother. The last thing her mother had ever said to her was, "you get away from your brother you brat!"

"What's wrong?" Remus asked, looking sideways at his sister. Rachael broke out of her trace of thought.

"What d'you mean?" she asked quickly.

"Well you look mad about something."

"Oh it's nothing… just thinking."

"Thinking about where you're going to go after school's over?"

"Yeah actually… how'd you know?"

"Well I figured you'd probably be thinking about it sooner or later. So, you think you'll be able to stay with dad?"

Rachael shrugged. "I dunno, maybe, if he stays at the castle over the break and Dumbledore lets me."

"He will… Dumbledore'll let you."

"Maybe… hopefully you're right."

* * *

When the twins got back to the common room they saw a few fifth years and third years still left. They searched the room for a sign of Lily or Peter; they doubted James and Sirius would be back from detention yet. If they were serving it with Professor Binstom they would be there forever.

Remus suggested playing a game of Exploding Snap, which Rachael quickly refused and offered to play Wizards' Chess instead. Remus agreed and waited while his sister ran up to her dormitory to get the set. She came down a minute later and set the chessboard and pieces down on the table.

She gave Remus the white pieces and she the black ones and they began to play.

Just as Remus's King was about to be checked the portrait hole burst open and in came James and Sirius, looking exhausted and their pants were sopping wet. They trudged over to Remus and Rachael and threw themselves down on the couch behind them.

"What happened to you guys?" Remus asked, looking at their wet pants and red hands.

"Binstom happened to us," James moaned.

"Two hours!" Sirius whined. "Two hours scrubbing the stupid dungeon floor with a stupid toothbrush! I'm never brushing my teeth again after that!"

"There's something we needed to know." Sirius lifted his foot and kicked James in the shins.

"Well, thank Snape for your detention," Rachael said, as she started clearing the chessboard off the table. "He'll be having fun over this."

James and Sirius exchanged quick glances.

"Didn't think about that," James said. "We'll have to do something."

"Well there's nothing like a little sweet revenge," Sirius said, cracking his sore knuckles.

"But first… what're we gonna do?"

* * *

Rachael was wandering down the third floor corridor that led to the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom. She was looking for her dad the entire day and hadn't found him anywhere in the castle, so she assumed he must be in his office. After all, where else would he be?

She walked past the Transfiguration classroom and peered inside. Much to her surprise, she saw her dad talking with Professor McGonagall. They were facing the wall, Professor Lupin with his hands folded behind his back and Professor McGonagall looking at a white sheet of paper that was hung on the wall. What was it? She wondered what they could be talking about.

"It can be arranged, can't it?" her dad asked in a sort of anxious voice.

Professor McGonagall took a step forward and looked as though she was searching for something particular on the sheet of paper. Rachael wished she could read it from where she was standing.

"I'm not sure," Professor McGonagall said in such a quiet voice that Rachael had to take a step inside the classroom to hear. "I'd have to discuss it with the Headmaster before I could tell you. See right there?" She pointed to a line on the paper; her dad leaned forward to read it. "'_If a student wishes to remain at school, the matter must be discussed with the Headmaster before any action is taken._'"

"I see…. I just wanted to check before I give her any false hopes. She hates the orphanage. She would much rather stay here."

"What about Remus?"

"Oh he'd go home, stay with his mum, he's better off there than his sister is." He checked his watch. "I should be heading to my office now. Severus Snape is serving detention with me in a half hour."

"Why now?"

"He blew up a Grindylow case in class… destroyed two desks next to it as well."

Rachael smiled to herself, James and Sirius's revenge worked after all. Well it was pretty simple in the first place. All they had to do was get Flitwick let them both out of class to, "go to the bathroom," and then they'd go to the bathroom. But on the way back they took a little detour to the third floor and stopped right in front of the Defence Against the Dark Arts room.

When they were there, Professor Lupin was showing them the wand motions for an incantation and right when Snape raised his wand James muttered a little spell under his breath and watched as sparks shot out of his wand. But they looked like they came out of Snape's wand and hit the Grindylow case so it blew up, sending the Grindylow flying in mid air and landing on the professor's desk. In the event two desks blew up as soon as their occupants ducked out of the way of the flying creature.

The prank was a little cruel but, according to James and Sirius, Snape got what he deserved. He should have known better than to mess with the prank masters.

"Rachael," came her dad's voice from behind her.

Rachael jumped. "Oh, hi dad," she said sheepishly.

"Can I help you with something?"

"No… I was just wandering around… I think I'll go to the Great Hall."

"Okay."

Rachael turned and ran down the corridor, and down a few flights of stairs and into the Great Hall where she saw the Gryffindor table, full of students, but absent of her friends. _Oh well_, she thought as she made her way to the table to sit down and begin to eat dinner. _They'll be here soon enough_.

She was thinking about what she heard her dad and Professor McGonagall talking about before. Her dad was trying to get her to stay at Hogwarts over the summer break. She hoped Dumbledore would see things her way and understand how she felt going back to that dreadful orphanage. She wondered why he wouldn't just let her stay. What had to be considered? Well of course she probably had to ensure everyone she wouldn't be much trouble, and she knew she wouldn't if she could stay at Hogwarts.

She chewed a piece of a lamb chop and stared blankly at the enchanted ceiling, which was a misty blue colour, thinking about what would happen if she would end up going back to the orphanage. She didn't want to go back to that horrible place after spending ten months at school. Her time at school was the happiest time she had in nearly four years.

If she stayed at Hogwarts she'd never have to see the hideous face of Becky Beckham. She cringed at the thought of her roommate. It had been a wonderful five months away from that sorry excuse for a human being.

She looked up at the table; her friends were still nowhere to be seen. As a matter of fact, Frank and Alice weren't even there. Her curiosity getting the better of her, she abandoned her dinner and went up to Gryffindor Tower to see what the holdup was. She walked up the giant marble staircase in the Entrance Hall, looking around for any sign of her friends. Then she saw some Slytherin sixth years walking by her, cackling madly. They were whispering frantically and Rachael strained her ears to catch their conversation.

"Those little Gryffindor first years didn't know what hit them!" said one with a pig-like face.

"Hope Moaning Myrtle likes a little company, even though they can't talk to her. Well, they can _snort_ at her," said another Slytherin. "Hey wait…." The Slytherin looked at Rachael, who was few steps above them. She stopped in her tracks. "We missed that one!"

Rachael looked over her shoulder to see the Slytherins approaching her. Without thinking for a second, she dashed at full speed up the steps, up another flight, not looking back but knowing that they were chasing her, hearing their footsteps pounding on the floor.

She ran up the flight leading up to the second floor and made a run for Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. She turned to see the Slytherins were nowhere in sight. They actually left her alone. She opened the door to the bathroom and what she saw nearly made her faint with surprise. Inside the bathroom were seven black, fully grown pigs.

"What the-?" She walked over to the smallest of the pigs and moved its snout around, as though that would give her some hint as to who it was. The pig got annoyed and gave a loud snort. Rachael jumped backwards so quickly she fell.

"Ooooh don't they look adorable?" came a high-pitched voice from behind her.

She wheeled around to see the pearly white, translucent figure of a sixteen-year-old girl with large glasses and messy pigtails.

"Hullo Myrtle," Rachael said, picking herself up and straightening her robes.

"Oh it's you!" she said, suddenly realising it was Rachael. "You'll love this then!" Rachael raised an eyebrow. "You don't know who they are?"

"I have a hunch…"

"Watch this!" Myrtle glided over to the smallest pig Rachael had been watching and shrieked. "Here Peter!" Immediately the pig sprinted towards Myrtle, who laughed shrilly. She always enjoyed it when others were put in misery.

"THAT'S PETER?" Rachael gasped, looking at the pig.

"Well, he always_ did_ look like a pig."

"How would you know? You never leave this place."

"Oh I go to the other bathrooms."

Rachael made a revolted face. "I didn't need to hear that." She looked at all of the other pigs. She knew where her friends were now. "Let me guess… the Slytherins did this?" Myrtle nodded gleefully. "Great… Okay then, Remus, James, Sirius, Peter, Lily, Alice, Frank, follow me!" The pigs hesitated. "I said… FOLLOW ME!" Even though they had pig faces, just by looking at them Rachael could tell they were all positively mortified.

Rachael led them up to the Transfiguration classroom and knocked.

"Come in!" came Professor McGonagall's voice from inside. Rachael opened the door and poked her head in.

"Professor?" she said, eyeing the professor nervously.

Professor McGonagall looked up from her desk. "Yes, Miss Lupin?"

"I have sort of a problem." She opened the door and shepherded her friends inside.


	21. Home It Is

Chapter Twenty One  
Home It Is

"That was the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me in my life!" Sirius exclaimed as they all left the Transfiguration classroom and went down to the Great Hall for the remainder of dinner.

"It's not like anyone knew it was you," Rachael said from behind Sirius.

"Yeah, but do you know how embarrassing it is to be yelling at a Slytherin and then you're snorting at it?" Rachael couldn't help but smile at the thought.

"How'd they find all of you anyway?"

Turns out that they had all been heading down to dinner after helping the Arithmancy teacher with something when a group of Slytherins found them and performed a simple Transfiguration spell and turned them into pigs, then after showing them to all of the Slytherins, stuck them in the bathroom on the second floor.

* * *

It didn't seem like any time at all before the first years realised their finals were approaching them. Time seemed to fly by in the blink of the eye. They had been able to laze around the grounds for hours on end until the finals came, then they were locked down in the castle with never-ending study periods.

"If I have to look at one more spell I'm going to go insane!" Remus howled one day as they prepared for the Charms final, which would take place for the next day. They had been in the common room (which was under a sort of silencing spell since everyone was preparing for exams) for nearly four hours, poring over every note they had ever taken from the beginning of the year up until that point. At first they thought it wasn't going to be that hard to study for, but then the second years told them they better start studying otherwise they would regret it.

"You mean you haven't already?" Rachael asked slyly as she looked up the Levitation Spell and practised it on a small feather she had gotten from her owl, Emerald. It hovered a few feet in the air until she allowed it to flutter to the table. Remus gave a sarcastic laugh.

"So all we have is Charms tomorrow right?" James asked, searching his bag for his final schedule.

"Yes," said Lily. "Then the next day we have Transfiguration and Defence Against the Dark Arts, the next day History of Magic and Herbology, then finally Astronomy and Potions."

James nodded. "Why do I even bother making a schedule?" he asked himself. "I have the human schedule right here!" He gestured towards Lily, who rolled her eyes and flipped the page in her Charms book.

* * *

Their Charms final went rather well, Lily felt especially confident that she passed. Remus and Rachael thought they did pretty well, so did James, Sirius, Frank and Alice… Peter wasn't so sure. He spent the entire morning pestering his friends for help while he did some last minute studying, as was the rest of the hall.

Transfiguration was a simple task of transfiguring a turtle into a tissue box; McGonagall graded them on how pretty the box was and took points off if it still had the shell pattern. Defence Against the Dark Arts was just the simple test of knowledge of Dark creatures and where to find them and how to protect yourself from them.

Their other exams were pretty easy in the eyes of the Gryffindor first years… they didn't have a fear in the world that they would fail, as a matter of fact if one of them did they would be shocked beyond belief.

* * *

It seemed like no time at all when they found themselves in the Great Hall listening to Professor Dumbledore as he announced the House Cup winners, sadly Gryffindor didn't win, but luckily Slytherin didn't. The scores were Hufflepuff in fourth place with three hundred and fifty three points, Slytherin in third place with three hundred and sixty nine points, Gryffindor in second place with an even four hundred points and Ravenclaw in first with four hundred and seventy four points.

Unfortunately for Rachael she would not be able to stay at Hogwarts over the break, she would have to go back to the orphanage. But Professor Dumbledore assured her that maybe in the future they would be able to have her.

* * *

"Don't worry," her dad had told her as she left with the rest of the school to head to Hogsmeade station. "Next year I might have enough gold to support us both and you can stay with me… but until then, try and have a good summer."

"I will, bye Dad."

* * *

"Okay, they said we can go through," said James as they stood in front of the barrier at Platform Nine and Three Quarters. They walked the barrier and appeared on the other side in a crowd of Muggles at Kings Cross. James, Sirius, Peter and Lily immediately spotted their families and went over to say hullo to them. Remus and Rachael hung back while they looked around.

"There's Mum," said Remus, pointing to his mum who was standing by Platform Eleven. Rachael nodded, looking around for Ms. Marshall, who was supposed to be taking her back to the orphanage. "Come on," Remus said, trying to get his sister to go over.

"No, she's just going to yell at me," Rachael answered holding back towards Platform Nine; she didn't want to go near her mother. But now she had no choice as her mother was walking towards them.

"Come on, Remus!" she said nastily. "We haven't got all day!"

"Nice to see you too, Mum," he answered coldly. "I just want to wait so I can say bye to my friends."

She nodded.

"There you are, Miss Lupin!" came the harsh voice of Ms. Marshall from behind her. Rachael turned to see her approaching. She stopped in front of Rachael and Remus. "Is this a friend?" She gestured towards Remus.

"He's my brother," Rachael corrected her.

Ms. Marshall eyed Remus curiously, then her eyes darted to Rachael's mum. "Are you her mother?"

"Yes, unfortunately. May I ask who you are?"

"I am her personal instructor at the orphanage."

"Well I hope you've been teaching her not to be foolish and cause terrible accidents!"

Rachael's fists clenched. Ms. Marshall didn't say anything at first. But then she did something Rachael thought she would never do in her life. She took a step forward and looked Rachael's mother in the eye.

"Now I may not be this girl's biggest fan but I must tell you this… this girl is your own flesh and blood, your daughter, and you shouldn't accuse her of such things! I like her as much as I like you but you have no right… she's your daughter… she loves you even if you don't love her. Come on, Rachael."

Rachael, who was too shocked to move, turned to follow Ms. Marshall. "Hold on," she said. She doubled back to Remus.

"I'll see you next year then… it's funny… I never thought she would ever say anything nice about me."

Remus smiled. "Well… she is right… but I've got to get going… see you next year."

Rachael watched the departing figures of Remus and her mum as Remus waved bye to James, Sirius and Peter, who Rachael waved to them as well as she went with Ms. Marshall.

"Ms. Marshall? Can I ask you something?"

"I suppose," she answered, now taking back the strict voice she used with her.

"What you said back there, all of the things you just said to my mum, did you really mean it?"

"Yes I did… I said you weren't my favourite person in the world but… you would never do anything she said you would… no one deserves to be treated in such a way… even you." She smiled and patted Rachael on the back.

Rachael smiled. "Thanks… I'll tell that to Becky."


	22. Year 2: If That's What It Takes

**Chapter Twenty One  
If That's What It Takes  
****Second Year  
**_**- "Her roommate pulled a little joke and she's got two broken wrists." -**_

It was a bright beautiful summer's day, the kind of day you would use to play outside or go swimming at the beach. The birds were singing as they soared through the sky. The trees were swaying in the light breeze. There wasn't a single cloud to be found in the sky and the grass was greener than it had been in years. Kids were running about outside, playing their games as some older kids walked along the sidewalk talking or others were sitting under the giant tree. But if the outside had reflected the mood inside a certain room in the orphanage, there would be a deadly storm raging.

Rachael Lupin was sitting on her bunk in her bedroom, trying to get some Charms homework finished while her roommate, Becky Beckham, was away from the room. Rachael could never get a free moment to do her homework and she was in danger of getting detention the first day she got back to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Becky was always around with her friends, or even just by herself, and her presence made it impossible for Rachael to do her work.

She was just lucky Professor Flitwick, the Charms teacher, might take some pity on her if she explained to him why she couldn't do her homework well enough to get a decent grade. But then there were some professors like Professor Binstom, the Potions professor, and Professor McGonagall, the Transfiguration professor. Binstom was nasty at all times of the day so, whatever reason she gave him, she knew he wouldn't let her off lightly. Professor McGonagall was a bit more understanding than the Potions teacher but she still wouldn't accept poorly done homework from a student whom she knew could accomplish much better.

She had been sure to get their homework done when she first got back from the orphanage. But she still knew she hadn't done it to the best of her abilities, as she was still upset about coming back to the dreadful orphanage. She was so close to getting to stay at Hogwarts too. But, to her misfortune, the Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, couldn't manage having her yet. But he had given her the hopes of being able to stay the next year, which was a bit comforting.

She set her quill down on her parchment and slowly closed her inkbottle. She sat up and read through her homework. It was okay; certainly not top marks, but good enough to avoid a failure. She set her homework down on her lap and looked down at her owl, Emerald, a beautiful brown owl with black specks and startling emerald eyes. Her cage was perched on the nightstand next to her roommate's bed. She hated the idea of it but Rachael's "personal instructor" Ms. Marshall had told her not to complain.

Rachael had to admit, she was quite surprised by Ms. Marshall's sudden change in attitude towards her. The first three years Rachael had lived at the orphanage Ms. Marshall had been unbearably mean towards her. But after picking her up at King's Cross Train Station and having met Rachael's mother, who was responsible for her being in the orphanage in the first place, Ms. Marshall had become pleasant towards Rachael. Obviously, having discovered what kind of a woman Rachael used to live with opened her eyes and forced her to become nice - a thought that was once unspeakable in her eyes.

Rachael set her homework down on her pillow and leaned over the back of her bed to spot her truck. It was lying a few feet away next to the closet. She gathered up her textbook, homework sheet, quill and inkbottle and made to climb down the ladder, only to discover, quite painfully, that the ladder was missing. She slid off her bed and onto the floor, holding her hands out to break the blow to her back, but not breaking the blow to her two wrists and they went surging with horrifying pain. She let out a shriek of pain.

She slowly lifted her arms up, felt the pain once more, and saw both her wrists hanging limply. She tried to move them, but quickly stopped.

_Darn it_! she thought angrily, _God, they're broken!_

She heard three sets of footsteps running towards her room; all light steps so she knew immediately who it was… and it didn't make the situation much better. She stood up quickly, ignoring the pain she was experiencing and very carefully, picked up her homework and textbook and hurried it over to her trunk, which was thankfully open. She dropped them into the contents and slammed it shut with her foot. Hearing the footsteps approach, she quickly ran over to the spot where her inkbottle smashed, leaving a considerably large black stain on the rug, and stood on it.

The door opened revealing three blonde haired, blue-eyed girls. The first was none other than Becky Beckham, the leader of the Three B's. She was closely followed by her two friends Brandy Culkin, and Brenda Lewis; both of them were on top of Rachael's crumb list, just below Becky of course. They were going on about the usual junk, their hair, boys, their looks, boys, their figures, did I mention boys? They stopped when they saw Rachael, who was busy trying to look as innocent and pained as possible.

"Oh," said Becky, her voice full of disgust, as it usually was when Rachael was present. "You're still in here?"

"Yeah, I am," Rachael retorted coldly. "What's the deal with taking my ladder down, huh?"

Becky and her friends tried to look innocent, but innocent was just something they weren't.

"We didn't," said Brandy in that horribly annoying high-pitched voice of hers.

Rachael cringed. Yes you did and because of that I know who to blame when I tell Ms. Marshall why I've got two broken wrists!"

"You wouldn't dare," Becky snarled.

"Oh wouldn't I? MS. MARSHALL!"

Immediately heavy footsteps came scurrying down the hall and the door burst open.

"What is it?" Ms. Marshall, a kindly looking old woman, asked breathlessly.

"The three geniuses decided to take the ladder away, so because of that I fell and got two broken wrists."

Ms. Marshall shot a furious glance at the Three B's and went over to Rachael. She asked her to hold out her arms and she would poke each wrist asking if it hurt.

"Yes it does!" she answered, her eyes tearing in pain.

"Come on."

She led Rachael out of the room and down towards the infirmary. Being that Rachael was there countless times the nurse, Mrs. Peddington, wasn't surprised to see who it was when the door opened.

"What happened this time?" she asked.

"Her roommate pulled a little joke and she's got two broken wrists."

* * *

Remus Lupin sat at the kitchen table of his house. He had also been doing his homework, just as his sister had been. But he had gotten distracted by his mother bustling into the room, holding a very familiar owl… Emerald.

"Do you know whose owl this is?" she asked him furiously.

Remus wasn't sure whether to nod or shake his head. His mother raised an eyebrow. "It's my sister's," he said slowly.

Her eyes flashed angrily at the mention of the word. She set the owl down, though it was unnecessary because the owl just went fluttering around the room. She took the parchment envelope and tore it open. She thrust the envelope on the table and began to read the letter.

"Mum," said Remus, making to take the letter. "She sent it to me, so shouldn't _I_ read it?"

She didn't answer him; she just continued to read the letter.

_Dear Remus,_

_Hi, how's your summer been? Mum treating you all right? I hope she is… But anyway, it's been okay here up until an hour or so ago. (Just so you know I'm dictating this to Ms. Marshall as I'm writing impaired for the next three weeks) my brilliant roommate decided to take the ladder off my bunk so I fell off it and broke my wrists… great isn't it? So… hear from James, Sirius or Peter lately? Wonder how they're doing. Write back if you can._

_Love,_

_Rachael._

For a moment it looked as though his mum was actually going to give him the letter. But instead she tore it up into halves, then fourths, then eighths and went to the window and tossed the pieces outside.

"Mum!" Remus yelled. "What'd you do that for?"

"I will not have her communicating with you!"

With that she burst out of the room. Remus slumped back in his seat. How could she do that? Did she have no heart? No conscience? She was just an empty shell that was kept alive out of anger and spite. He wanted to write to his sister, but he knew if his mum saw his owl flying off she would know where it was going. Why was his mother such a… such a… jerk?

Even though she loved him… he knew he could never love his mother back. She was just a cold hearted, evil woman. How could someone be so cruel…?


	23. Forgiving isn't Easy

Chapter Twenty Three  
Forgiving Isn't Easy

Rachael sat in the courtyard of the orphanage staring blankly at a group of five year olds playing tag. She leaned back on the bench and inspected her casts. Both of them were large and uncomfortable. She wanted nothing more then to rip them off and chuck them in the bin, but of course she had to restrain herself. When Ms. Marshall told the head of the orphanage, Mrs. Ramben, what the girls had done, Rachael was hoping so much that they would end up writing lines or scrubbing the cafeteria or some horrible punishment Rachael had been told to do whenever she did something wrong.

But to her complete shock...well not so much shock but... you get the picture... all Mrs. Ramben told them to do wasn't to do that again. Rachael was so enraged she wanted to scream that every time those two did something wrong all they were told to do wasn't to do it again. Why did she always end up getting to do the dirty work?

Ms. Marshall must have known what was going through her mind because she immediately took Rachael out of the room. Ever since she got back from school she realised she actually _needed_ a personal instructor to keep her from doing something stupid. Otherwise she probably wouldn't get to go back to school. If she hadn't had a personal instructor to keep her in check she might've transfigured the three of them into slugs or something by now... oh how tempting the thought was.

_Wonder if Remus got my letter_, she thought as she gazed up at the blue sky and watched a sparrow fly overhead. She hoped her mother hadn't gotten to it before Remus. If she did then there was no way Remus would ever see it. She would bet all of the gold in Gringotts that if her mum got to it before Remus, the letter would be somewhere drifting in the breeze in fifty pieces. She now wondered why she had bothered writing at all. She couldn't guarantee Remus would get the letter at all. She was sure his eyes would never see it. Well they might see the envelope at least...

"Why are you out here by yourself?" said a voice from behind. She ignored it; no one was going to ask her that question. She looked down at the group of kids playing tag. One of them had tripped over another kid's outstretched foot and fell into some mud. She watched as the other kids around him laughed. She felt a sudden surge of sympathy for the boy in the mud. "Rachael?" said the voice again.

Rachael jerked up and spun around. Behind her was one of the only kids in the orphanage who was nice to her, Brittany Becker. She was standing behind her, fixing her brown hair.

"Just thinking," Rachael answered truthfully. But she wasn't willing to discuss what she was thinking about... even more so when Brittany asked. "Nothing... just stuff."

"What happened?" Brittany asked looking down at Rachael's broken wrists.

"My roommate that's what," she answered bitterly.

Brittany made a face of disgust; she knew how horrible Becky was. Then again... who didn't know? "Well what'd she do?"

Rachael launched into the tale of how she was doing her homework and went to go put it away when she discovered, painfully, that it was missing. So she made hard contact with the floor and resulted in a trip to the infirmary. Brittany listened, a look of revulsion on her face the entire time. She disliked Becky just as much as Rachael did... and you can imagine how much she didn't like her then. Being that she knew Becky a lot longer.

"I never liked that girl," she said grimly. "I remember when she first came here."

"When was that?"

"Oh... around seven years ago I guess... She was five I think..." She launched into a tale about how her mother's house was set on fire when she was a child and when the firemen came in to get everyone out they never found her mother. It seemed she was in the bathroom on the first floor and thought she was safe. Her mother perished in the fire. Becky was on the second floor and the fire never made it all the way up there so she was saved, along with all of her belongings.

She hadn't any other family. Her father had died a few months after she was born and she had no grandparents living on the continent that she knew of so she was sent to the orphanage.

When she got there everyone felt sorry for her, losing her mother in such a way. But they all soon learned that feeling sorry for this person was something you simply couldn't do. Even as a five year old she was pure evil, always shooting her mouth off and causing havoc. But she never got in trouble for it. No one could understand why Mrs. Ramben could take pity on such an undeserving child. That was something that always remained a mystery...

"Honestly though, when she was five she knew enough to make the lunch in the cafeteria explode!"

Rachael laughed. It reminded her of the time in Potions when Snape made their potion explode and he was covered in blue goop. "I can imagine..." she said, still grinning. "How long've you been here anyway?" She knew it wasn't such a good question to ask, but she was curious.

"Since I was born, I think," she answered, not looking the faintest bit bothered by the question. "My parents abandoned me so some police found me and brought me here... been here all my life."

"Your parents just left you? That's terrible."

"I suppose, but I'm not really bothered about it. If my parents could abandon their child, they couldn't have been nice people anyway."

"I guess."

"How come you came here?"

Rachael was startled at first, but knew she should have been expecting it, and it was only right for her to tell, with vagueness of course. "My mum disowned me," she said simply, trying her best to look as though it didn't bother her as much as it did... and it bothered her a lot.

"Why?"

"Because me and my twin brother were in an accident."

"You have a twin." Rachael nodded. "What's his name?"

"Remus. Anyway... we were in an accident and I got blamed for it."

"How come she blamed you? Did you even know what happened?"

"No I ran into a tree. My mum just doesn't have the best of patience and understanding I guess... She overacted and sent me here."

"Speaking of your mother," came a voice from behind Rachael and Brittany.

They turned around to see Ms. Marshall approaching them, clutching a parchment envelope. "She sent you this."

She handed Rachael the envelope and marched back towards the building while Rachael tore (very carefully) the letter open.

_Dear my good for nothing so-called "daughter"_

_What have I told you about sending Remus letters? Don't you realise we want nothing to do with you? Hasn't that penetrated your thick skull? So STOP RIGHT NOW! I want no association with you and you should know that by now!_

_So STOP SENDING HIM LETTERS RIGHT NOW!_

_Your alleged mother._

Rachael glared at the letter for a mere second before crumpling it up in her fist, jumping off the bench and running inside. Brittany, who had been reading over Rachael's shoulder, didn't even try and stop her; she knew Rachael had to be alone. Rachael ran through the double doors, down a long corridor, up a flight of stairs and into her room. She climbed up the ladder (which had been found in the utility closet) and buried her face in her pillow.

_I hate her!_ she thought resentfully. _I hate her! I hate that woman! Why did she blame me? Why? I didn't even do anything! I hate her! _

She heard the door to her room open, but she didn't even bother to look down, seeing her roommate would not make her feel any better. But Becky didn't even seem to notice Rachael was in the room. She sat down on her bed after going to the closet and taking out her book bag and started doing her summer work. Rachael listened to the scratching of her roommate's pencil as she tried to forget about her mum's letter, but she knew she couldn't. Why did her mother hate her so much? It wasn't her fault! It wasn't her fault they were in the forest! Remus had suggested it! He was the one who want to go in there! Not her! She even tried talking Remus out of it... but he didn't listen to her! He was the one to blame!

_No_, she told herself. _No, I can't blame Remus for this... he didn't know Mum would do this. _She sniffed and wiped her eyes on her pillow.

The scratching of the pencil stopped. Becky stood up and climbed the ladder. "What's your problem?" she asked harshly.

"None of your business," Rachael snarled.

"Come on really, what's wrong?"

Rachael rolled over and gestured towards the crumpled letter next to her. Becky picked up the letter, unfolded it, and smoothed it out on Rachael's bed. She read it in a matter of a half of a minute and Rachael wasn't even sure why she could possibly want to read it. Becky and Rachael were worst enemies after all. When Becky had finished reading she let out a low whistle.

"Wow that's mean," she said.

"Yeah, I know that!" Why did _Becky_ care so much? For what she was like she should have been agreeing with the letter, not saying it was mean! Becky wasn't the person who would actually point out that someone was that mean!

"No need to get angry at me, I was just saying it was mean," said Becky, defending herself.

"Yeah well... since when do you care how someone treats _me? _You don't treat me any better than my stupid mum does!"

"You shouldn't talk about your mother like that."

"Since when are you one to lecture someone else about how to treat someone? You treat me like dirt and you can tell me how to treat someone who hates for something I never did!"

"Yeah, well, she_ is_ your mother."

"She's no mother of mine... As far as I'm concerned, I'd rather have Ms. Marshall as my mother than this woman! She hates me and I can't say I like her more than she likes me!"

"You know you don't believe that..."

"How do you know what I believe?"

"Because you wouldn't believe it."

"Where do you get off preaching?"

"Look... I know I'm always mean to you, but just because I'm mean don't mean that I don't know you. You wouldn't say that! You love your mother even if she doesn't love you back."

Rachael didn't answer. Becky was right. Even though she always said she hated her mother, she didn't. She was just frustrated, she wanted her mother to love her as she used to. When she used to treat her like a daughter and not a criminal... when she loved her and Remus equally...

"I do... its just... I want my mum to love me like she used to... before she thought I wasn't anything but a criminal."

"Why does she think you're a criminal?"

"It's not something I'd discuss with the person who took the ladder off my bed."

"I'm sorry!"

"How do I know? You might just go and pull again and make my wrists snap off this time."

Becky frowned. She had never realised what she did was wrong. She thought it was fun. "Look I'm really sorry... I know I've been horrible to you and I'm sorry."

"Like I can believe that."

"I am! I really am sorry... I was being an idiot!"

"Yeah, you were."

Becky sighed... this wasn't going to be easy... not easy at all. "Listen... I am sorry; the letter your mother wrote made me realise that... that you don't need more people making your life miserable... I really am sorry."

Rachael wasn't sure to believe her or not. This was this person who caused her pain and torment for four years. It wasn't easy to forgive someone like that. But... there was just something about the way Becky had said sorry that made it sound like she meant it.

"Can you just tell me?" Becky asked hopefully.

"Fine... it was four years ago... Me and my twin brother were coming home from getting groceries for my mum; we took a short cut through the woods. We'd been walking for a while and kept hearing growling sounds following us. We tried getting out as fast as we could, then we found a...a... wolf. It started chasing us. My brother got caught behind but told me to keep running; I was so stupid for listening. I ran into a tree, the wolf got him. It...it... well it hurt him really bad.

"When my mum found out she went crazy, she blamed me even though I hadn't done anything wrong, I never knew what happened. No matter how many times me and my brother told her she would listen. She talked my dad into disowning me and bringing me here."

Becky was silent after listening. So this was the reason why Rachael was the way she was. She had a no good mother who could do something as horrible as disowning her child for something she had no control over.

"Rachael... I really am sorry."


	24. Here's James and Sirius

Chapter Twenty Four  
Here's James and Sirius

An owl fluttered outside an open window… a snowy white owl with green eyes. It was tapping its talons at the window in an attempt to attract someone's attention. Remus, who was sitting on the floor of his room reading a book, looked up and spotted the owl. He had never seen it before, or at least he didn't think he did. It looked vaguely familiar, as though he had seen it once before. He lifted himself up and crossed over to the window, opening the latches.

As soon as the last latch was lifted the last lock the owl burst through the window, knocking Remus off his feet in shock. The owl hooted gleefully and perched itself on Remus's dresser. Remus walked over and took the envelope from it. He read it and discovered that it was from James, asking if he ever wanted to hang out during the summer. Remus folded the letter and decided to ask his mum if James could stay at their house for some of the summer. It was only the second week of July, maybe he could stay until August, Sirius too.

Remus ran downstairs to find his mother, still in a bad mood from Rachael's letter, which Remus was still angry that he never got to see. He had to keep resisting the temptation to send her a letter, risking his mother catching him. But he knew she was watching all lines of communication from her house.

His mum was bustling about the kitchen in a last ditch attempt to get dinner on the table before eight at night. She was stirring a pot of macaroni quickly and absentmindedly pouring in what appeared to be licorice sticks. Remus made a face of mixed disgust and approval. It would be interesting to see what _that_ combination tasted like.

"Mum?" he asked uncertainly.

"Yes?" she huffed.

"I got a letter from my friend James, from school… I was wondering if maybe he wanted to stay a few weeks here, and my friend Sirius?"

His mother stopped stirring and set her wooden spoon on the towel next to the stove. "I suppose, when could they get here?" she asked, folding her arms across her chest.

"As soon as I send them letters asking," Remus answered coolly. His mother nodded and he ran up to his room, sat down at his desk and immediately began writing two invitations to his friends. He would have made it three; one for Peter, but Peter was off visiting relatives in Spain for the summer.

Remus sealed the envelope and called over James's owl and then got his own owl and sent them both off with the letters… hoping they could come.

* * *

Dinner at the orphanage was a quiet affair, nothing apart from the gentle murmur of conversation from the several tables. Rachael was sitting by herself, trying to find the least painful way of picking up her fork to feed herself. Eating with two broken wrists wasn't the easiest thing in the world to do. She wished she could just bewitch her fork to feed herself. It was either down to learning to pick up a fork or eating with her mouth.

"It's useless," she mumbled, leaning back in defeat. The dinner wasn't worth the hassle anyway. She looked around the room to see that it was barely full. She looked up at the wall clock to discover that it was near seven in the evening so it wasn't unusual.

"Oh look… some of the dinner escaped!" came an only too familiar, not to mention annoying, voice from behind. Rachael turned her head slightly to see the figure of Brandy Culkin. Surprisingly she was alone. She was never seen without her cronies Becky or Brenda Lewis.

Rachael groaned. "What do you want?" she snapped.

"Oh just to see if the rat was getting on."

"Oh I am, but the hippo doesn't look it?" she retorted looking pointedly at Brandy. Brandy sniffed her nose.

"Yes well… at least I look fit to walk the earth."

"Which earth are we talking about?"

"The one you're not on. You're on the planet of complete ugliness, stupid unloved child who-"

"SHUT UP!" Rachael was on her feet now, glaring Brandy in the eye, ready to knock the sense out of her. "You just shut up!""Who's going to make me stop?"

"I will!"

But it wasn't Rachael who spoke. Both her and Brandy turned around to see none other than Becky Beckham stalking towards them.

"Becky… what're you doing?" Brandy said, gaping at her friend in horror. For a moment it looked as though Brandy couldn't use her tongue, she was fumbling so badly. A few others in the cafeteria looked up to witness this sudden change of events. Becky, on the other hand, knew exactly what she wanted to say.

"What do I think I'm doing?" she sneered. "What do I think I'm doing? I'll tell you what I think I'm doing, I'm stopping you from bothering her!"

"But - but - but… it's RACHAEL LUPIN we're talking about!" Brandy argued, clearly losing her composure at her friend's sudden strange behaviour. "How can you defend _her_?" She threw a mean gesture at Rachael, who was standing there watching this, all with mild curiosity.

"Like this." And before anyone knew what had happened, Becky gave Brandy a sharp kick in the shins. Brandy shrieked and began hopping up and down, clutching her shins. Feeling there wasn't any time better, Rachael began to slide out of the cafeteria… luckily unnoticed.

_Well that was… strange_, Rachael thought as she strolled down the hallway, not looking for anywhere in particular to go. Becky sticking up for her was just unheard of. Rachael couldn't say she blamed Brandy for being surprised. If she were her (which she was thankful she wasn't) she would've been shocked beyond all belief. She heaved a sigh and turned down the hall into the common room.

* * *

Remus sat eagerly on the porch of his house. James and Sirius had to arrive by the Knight Bus, as Sirius's parents weren't exactly keen on letting him do anything that he would enjoy and James's fireplace was destroyed (due to the fact that his overweight uncle had tried using Floo Powder and broke the entire thing) so his Floo Powder travelling was out of the question.

James and Sirius should be arriving at any minute. They had said one o' clock and, according to Remus's watch; it was now 12:59 exactly. He couldn't wait to see his friends. Even though it had only been two weeks since he had last seen them, after being with them all year it was a long time to him to not see his friends. They would be staying in Rachael's old room. All of her old belongings were still there. Her bed was as it was four years before, all her toys still there and untouched, her clothes still hanging and folded in the drawer, nothing had been changed.

Of course it wasn't supposed to stay that way. Remus's mother wanted all of her stuff removed to prove that she was no longer a member of the family, but Remus put his foot down. He wouldn't have his mother get rid of his sister's stuff. Just to ensure it Remus's father put a special charm on the door so she wasn't able to touch anything. Remus went in there earlier to clean it up, as dust had been building up in the four years of absence from its usual occupant.

James would be using his sister's old bed and Sirius would have to help Remus drag the spare mattress out of the attic and help him set up the bed frame for it.

Remus stared out into the street and saw some of his old friends. Dominick Sweazy, Billy Trent and Jack Higgles. They didn't know what Remus was of course, being that they were Muggles, but they knew something was wrong with him and avoided him at all costs. They were in deep conversation when Dominick spotted Remus watching them and they quickly turned the other way and ran.

Remus rolled his eyes and continued to wait for his friends. He wondered how long it took for some time to get to another place travelling by the Knight Bus. If it were a bus it might take a while.

BANG!

Remus fell backwards as a giant, purple, triple-decker crashed in front of him. It knocked into the garbage pails, knocking them over, spilling garbage all over the porch. Remus picked himself up and looked at the bus. So this was the Knight Bus….

The front door burst open and out fell James and Sirius, both looking rather green from the ride. Following James was a grizzled old man with a monocle. He was dragging out their suitcases and dropped them on the floor. He looked at James and Sirius.

"That'll be seven sickles each, boys," he said in a weedy voice.

"What?" James said incredulously. "We paid you when we got on!"

The man stuck his hand inside his pocket and pulled out fourteen silver sickles. He looked up at the boys again and grinned foolishly, revealing his yellowing teeth.

"Oh… right… sorry, boys…Well… thank you for riding the Knight Bus." The man got back onto the bus and with another sharp BANG the bus was off around the corner.

James and Sirius picked up their suitcases with disgruntled faces and walked towards Remus, who greeted them with a merry wave.

"All right, Remus?" Sirius asked, stopping in front of Remus and leaning on his suitcase.

"Yeah, you guys?" Remus answered.

"Pretty good," James said, "With the exception of the ride here… my advice, never take the Knight Bus." He cringed at the thought of riding it.

"It was that bad?"

"Not unless you call falling off your seat… what was it? Twenty times bad, then you could say it was fun."

Remus laughed. If he was ever offered the chance to go on the Knight Bus, he knew now he'd turn it down, although it might be fun to get tossed about but… He picked up his friends' suitcases and brought them into the house with James and Sirius trailing at his heels.

They stepped inside to hear his mother talking to someone. Curious, the three of them crept stealthily towards the living room to see Remus's mum sitting to the side of the fireplace and talking to something inside of it. First Remus thought his mother was losing what was left of her mind and was talking to a log, and then he noticed it was a head. Remus studied the head for a moment. The head had glasses…sandy brown hair, much like his own… green eyes… Mr. Gregory Lupin's head was perched in the fire… but why?

James and Sirius poked their heads past Remus and looked at Mr. Lupin curiously.

"Professor Lupin?" Sirius asked, looking at head oddly.

Professor Lupin's eyes flickered towards the boys. "Hullo boys!" he said in most cheerful voice he could muster. "Didn't notice you there… Having a good summer?"

The boys nodded, all of them wondering why he was here of all places. Professor Lupin looked back up at Remus's mother and began talking again. He was talking very swiftly and quietly, so as not to let his son and friends hear what he was saying. But that didn't stop them from hearing flashes of it, though he couldn't make out what they were talking about.

They caught phrases such as, "you know it's right," and, "would never hear of it." Putting two and two together he had a slight idea as to what they might be talking about. But he knew it was a lost cause, Mum was too stubborn and Dad just didn't see it that it was useless to argue.

Finally…

"Just think about it. Bye, boys." And with that the head vanished from the fire. Remus's mum turned to them, looking slightly agitated, as Remus didn't doubt she would after speaking to her husband. She turned to see the boys standing in the doorway and forced a rather hideous smile.

"Hullo," she said in a high voice, as though nothing were bothering her. "James and Sirius." As she said this, she didn't realise she had called James Sirius and Sirius James. She knew quite well what they looked like as Remus had shown her pictures of them from school. James and Sirius exchanged hysterical glances.

"Uh no, Mum," Remus said slowly. "_This_ is James," he gestured towards James, who was trying his best to put on a straight face, but the strain was obvious. "And _this_ is Sirius," he pointed to Sirius, who, like James, was doing his best not to laugh.

"Oh," said his mum sheepishly, going red in the cheeks. "Right… well pleased to meet you anyway." She reached out a hand for the both of them to shake. As a joke both James and Sirius both grasped her hand and wrung it up and down. Startled at first, his mum got the joke and smiled. "Well show them to their… _room_, Remus."

"Okay," Remus said brightly. "James, Sirius, walk this way please." Remus sunk into a low bow and watched as James and Sirius walked by. Remus led them up the flight of stairs and all the way to the back room. He opened the door and did, yet again, a little sarcastic bow and James and Sirius waltzed in.

"So you two'll be staying in Rachael's old room," Remus said, gesturing around at all the evidence that a girl had definitely lived in this room, all of the stuffed animals that is.

"James, you'll use that bed," Remus pointed to Rachael's old bed. James picked up his suitcase and dropped it on it. "And Sirius, you have to help me get the spare one out of the attic." Sirius nodded.

James sat down on the bed and looked around. "Do the lights work in here?" James asked, indicating the fact that there was only a dim light shining down from the light fixture.

"No, I dunno what me and my sister did, but we did that," Remus said, smiling. It was strange to be standing in the middle of his sister's room, when she hadn't been in it for four years. But still everything was as it was… just a little cleaner. He sat down against the opposite wall and leaned his head back.

"You can sit you know," he said, turning his head towards Sirius, who was still standing in the doorway. Sirius dropped his suitcase and jumped down next to James.

"Actually," Remus said, lifting himself up. "Let's go up to the attic now, get that over with."


	25. Sirius Speaks Out

Chapter Twenty Five  
Sirius Speaks Out

Page 75… _Charms for Everyday Use_…_brilliant_. Rachael sat up on her bed and leaned backwards on her pillow. How could the professors expect them to enjoy their summer if they gave them mounds of homework over it? It was near impossible! Professor Flitwick, nice as he may be, gave them two chapters to read and a two-foot long essay about them. Well, Rachael didn't have to cramp her hands writing them at least. Ms. Marshall agreed to write any homework she had. All Rachael had to do was dictate it.

But it was still a pain to read all the chapters. Rachael sat up and kicked her book closed. Work, work, work… that was all she was able to do. She couldn't go outside and play in a game or something. Now that Becky wasn't abusing her, she was inviting Rachael to hang out with her. But Rachael had to decline all the offers. For one thing, she was still a bit uneasy about hanging out with Becky… It was such a spur of the moment change that she hadn't been able to process it right away.

Second… how could she possibly have time to enjoy herself when her homework was at such an alarming rate? Even her father managed to give them a considerably large amount of homework. He had them analysing the qualities of vampires, skrewts, and werewolves. Luckily it was only three creatures, but they had so many qualities it was as if he had assigned quadruple the amount. She rubbed her eyes and rolled over on her stomach. The dormitory was empty, which she was glad about, she liked having it quiet. The only source of noise was the gentle hooting of Emerald as she snoozed in her cage.

She looked up at the wall clock to see that it was seven in the evening already. The day was almost over and she hadn't accomplished so much as a sentence of homework. Feeling that she should at least have read _something_, she gently opened her Charms book again and began to read.

* * *

"On three, pull," Remus said as he, James and Sirius grasped the rope that pulled down the attic door.

They had each taken turns in trying to pull the attic door down and each attempt proved futile. First Remus tried, he grabbed the rope and yanked it down, the door shifted a bit but other than that it just stayed put. Sirius then tried, he managed to pull the rope, but the attic didn't come down. Instead he pulled himself up until he was hanging off the rope, which he quickly used as a vine and did a few swings and then jumped down before the attic door came crashing down on him. James then tried and yet again there was failure. Remus wondered how his mother could pull it down when three boys couldn't.

"Okay… three!" They pulled with all their might until the door fell down, knocking the three boys down.

"Well that worked," Sirius said sarcastically, helping James up.

"Yeah, next time let's try and pull the door off the hinges," James added as he dusted his shirt off. Remus pulled the folded stairs down and they began their climb up. The attic was a dark room; it was near impossible to see the light switch. Remus had to grope the wall to find it. When he did bright lights came on, revealing the Lupin attic, cluttered with old boxes, a Christmas tree, several blankets, and the old mattress and bed frame in the very corner.

"It's cold up here," James said, shivering slightly.

Remus nodded and they began walking over to the corner, avoided knocking into some of the boxes on the way. Remus noticed as they walked their shoes left footprints on the wooden floors. _How long has it been since anyone was up here_? Remus climbed over a particularly large box and stopped in front of the mattress. He kneeled down and picked it up, resting it on its side. Then he went behind it and began gathering the pieces to the bed frame.

"I could use some help, you know," Remus said irritably when he realised James and Sirius were off in another part of the attic. They didn't listen to Remus when he spoke. "HEY!"

James and Sirius jumped.

"You could've asked!" James joked.

"Very funny."

"Look what we found." James was pointing to the large box Remus had climbed over.

Curious, Remus stood up, walking around the mattress, which took up more space now that it was lying sideways, and crawled down to his knees in front of the box. He saw that James had wiped the dust off it and there was now a large sign on it that said _Remus and Rachael: Home Videos_. Remus never remembered them having home videos… that was odd.

"What're home videos?" Sirius asked, looking at the box with utter bewilderment.

"Something Muggles use to record memories or something," Remus answered. There was only one person in this family that would have had the idea to do this… his dad. His dad always had a passion for Muggle objects. He had no doubt in his mind that the moment his father heard of home videos he went right out to get everything he needed to make them.

Remus pulled the masking tape off the box, crumpled it up and threw it in a corner. He pulled the cardboard open and saw a large stack of black, plastic rectangles. What were these? He took the stack out and counted them, there were eight, one for each year of their life. He looked inside the box again and found a large rectangle with a cylinder sticking out of its front.

"What _is_ that?" James asked, staring at it in amazement.

"I think it's called a camerea… or something like that," Remus answered, looking inside the cylinder. "I remember my dad talking about it to the Muggle Studies professor at school…. I think she needed it."

Sirius shrugged and suggested getting the bed down to his sister's old room and then having a look at the rectangles. He grabbed one end of the mattress and Remus took the other, while James picked up the pieces of the frame and led the way back down the attic steps. They spent a good ten minutes setting up the bed for Sirius and Remus's mum came up carrying some sheets for them to put on it.

"Mum?" Remus said as he tucked in the sheets. She looked at him. "Can we look at the home videos that were in the attic?"

"Well you need a television," she answered.

"A _what_?"

"A television. A box that pictures come out of, Muggles use it. There's a small one in the attic. You can use it."

Remus nodded and watched as his mother walked out. He had been careful to not mention they were home videos of him and his _sister_; otherwise she would have forbidden it in a second and went to burn the tapes. They finished setting up Sirius's bed and went back up to the attic where Sirius and James sorted out the tape from age one to eight and Remus went to go find the television. Since the television was needed for the videos, he figured it wouldn't be too far away from the videos.

Remus moved aside the Christmas tree and found a small box looking thing. It had a screen… this must be it. He looked at it wondering how to make it work. He leaned on his stomach on the cold wooden floor and stared at it. There were some knobs on it, he turned them but they didn't do anything. There were several buttons with little words scrawled above them. Remus squinted his eyes to look at them. One said 'volume', 'tuning', 'off' and the one he was looking for 'on.' Remus pushed the button and blinked quickly as static appeared on the screen, slowly dissolving and revealing a fuzzy moving picture of a man and a little boy talking.

"Well I got the te-le-vi-sion on," Remus said, turning his head to look at James and Sirius. James nodded and he and Sirius picked up the stacks of tapes and brought them over. They stooped down to their knees and handed one to Remus. He looked at it and saw _Remus and Rachael: Age 7_ written messily on a white label. _Jeez,_ he thought incredulously, _my parents actually took the time to record what we did when we were seven, weird_.

Remus looked at the rectangle, which he learned was actually called a videotape, and then looked at the television. Where was he supposed to put it? He tried to put it through the screen, but wasn't able to. Sirius peered at the television and spotted a little rectangle shaped piece that he could put his finger through.

"Try here," he said, pointing towards it.

Remus turned the tape and stuck it through. Immediately the screen turned black and another fuzzy picture began to appear. At first he wasn't sure what it was, the picture seemed out of focus. Then it began to come into clearer view and he realised he was looking at himself at his old Muggle school's play. He remembered that, he was seven and they were doing this Muggle play called Peter Pan. He had been a lost boy; he forgot the name of his character, though.

James and Sirius were obviously trying not to laugh as their faces were turning a deep shade of red. Remus was in the middle of singing a song with his fellow classmates and his sister. _What role had she played…? Oh that's right, she was Peter Pan_. How could he have forgotten she was the lead? She was singing now. Remus had forgotten what a nice singing voice his sister had. As they watched Remus could hear his mother say from the side of the camera, "I could sit forever listening to her sing." How could _that_ be the same person who disowned her?

They watched a bit more of that video, being that it was only the play. Remus took it out and James handed him one from when they were four. Remus watched the four-year-old version of his self, he was so small, his eyes seemed a bit too big for his face and his hair was very long. Remus had to admit he was a strange looking four year old. Wait a minute… if that was him… no. A minute later another four year old walked in with short hair, small green eyes and a tiny bit taller. Had he just confused himself for his sister? _I'm losing it_. He and his sister were talking to their dad as he taped them. He was asking them all these dumb questions such as, "where do Blast Ended Skrewts come from?" knowing that they didn't have the answer.

A few more minutes later the television ran out of power and shut off. Remus took the last tape out and packed them up. As they were walking back down from the attic Remus couldn't help but still think about those tapes, even though he doubted they would be looked at again for a long time. How was it that his family had once been happy together? It didn't seem possible anymore now that it had only been him and his mother living in the house for four years while his dad was off working at the Menagerie and Hogwarts and Rachael was living in an orphanage. He didn't think that family ever once existed, but seeing it all again… it did.

They went down to Remus's room where James and Sirius examined some of Remus's possessions. They were really fascinated with the self-charting moon chart he had to remind himself when the full moons were.

"Where'd you get it?" Sirius asked as he looked for the full moon for that month.

"My mum got it for me at Dervish and Banges a few years ago," Remus answered, stooping down next to Sirius and looking at the chart. Sirius scanned the chart a bit more and discovered the full moon would be two nights before he and James left.

"There's the next one," Sirius said, pointing to July 30th. Remus nodded. Sensing that Remus didn't want to look at the chart anymore, James quickly pointed to a sneakoscope on Remus's nightstand and began to look at it. Remus got up and picked up another one he had lying on his nightstand. He didn't even know why he had them, he didn't use them and he doubted they worked, but he liked them anyway.

* * *

Rachael was walking down a corridor in the orphanage towards the common room. She had to get out of her room and away from her homework… it was driving her up the wall! Also, this was probably the first time she didn't leave her room to get away from Becky. She was being so nice to her that it was getting kind of creepy.

But comparing the new Becky with the old Becky, Rachael had to say she liked the new one a lot better. It was nice to wake up to the birds chirping and not a wakeup call. Still it was odd… very odd… okay it was the weirdest thing she had ever witnessed in her life… and she had seen plenty of strange things in her life. She sat down in one of the armchairs and watched lazily as some little kids drew pictures on the tables. One of them was constructing what looked like a house, but it was missing a door.

"Did you hear, Lupin?" said a rather snotty voice from behind Rachael.

Rachael leaned her head back to discover her two least favourite people on the planet: Brandy Culkin and Brenda Lewis. "Hear what?" she snarled.

"There's a talent show next week, you should sign up! You could show everyone your talent of being incredibly stupid," Brenda said mockingly, expecting Rachael to yell at her, but instead she was smiling.

"Oh, I believe that was _your_ area of talent, not to mention self absorbed snot. But you're right about something; I am going to sign up. Where's the notice?"

Brandy jerked a finger towards the notice board behind the television. Rachael jumped off the chair and ran over to look at the note.

_Talent Wanted _

_The orphanage will be hosting a talent show amongst our residents, which will be held next week on July 18th. All are invited with whatever talent you wish to show. To enter please sign up with the talent you possess._

Rachael grabbed the pen under the notice and scribbled her name and singing for her talent. She capped the pen and walked past the girls with a satisfied smirk.

* * *

It was dinnertime at the Lupin household. Remus's mum had made quiet a spread of food in honour of James and Sirius's first night staying there. There was steak, vegetables and potatoes, a whole lot of them. The boys sat down and immediately started eating while they listened to Remus's mum ask them questions about school and then talking about her days at Hogwarts, which weren't remotely interesting. She was now going on about how she and her fellow Ravenclaws would sneak out and (what she thought was hilarious but in reality wasn't even the least bit funny) roam around the grounds.

Sirius faked a smile and engaged his two friends in conversation before Remus's mum could get out another word. "So… err… James, going to try out for Quidditch this year?" he asked James, who was busy cutting up a piece of steak and humming quietly so as to drown out Mrs. Lupin's endless rambling.

"'Course I am, they're looking for Chasers on the Gryffindor team," James answered. "I think Bridget Becker left school last year so I'm going to try and get her place."

"Aren't they looking for more positions?" Remus asked interestedly.

"Yeah, Melanie Bigg and Craig Johnson graduated last year too, so they need a new Beater and Seeker."

"Why don't you try for Seeker?" Sirius asked.

"I dunno I don't much fancy seeking."

"You're all in Gryffindor?" Mrs. Lupin asked unnecessarily. The boys nodded. "Who else is?"

"Our friend Peter Pettigrew," Remus said, counting them off on his fingers. "Alice Gordon, Frank Longbottom, Lily Evans and Rachael." Remus's mum made a noise of disgust. "Yes she's in Gryffindor, Mum!"

"I hope you don't talk to her."

"Oh yeah like I'm going to ignore my sister, especially when she's right there and I don't want to ignore her in the first place."

"Well you should ignore her!"

James and Sirius exchanged nervous glances. They really didn't want to witness a row between Remus and his mother, but they also couldn't stand to listen to what they were hearing.

"Excuse me?" Sirius said timidly. "Can I say something, Mrs. Lupin?"

"Of course, Sirius," she answered, suddenly adopting a pleasant voice quite different from the one she had been using.

"Well… you can't really blame Remus can you? She _is_ his sister."

"Yes, but she is also a horrible kid."

A flash of anger appeared in Sirius's eyes that neither James nor Remus had ever seen before. They knew this wouldn't be good. "A horrible kid? A _horrible_ kid?" he stammered, in a forced calm voice. "She is _not_ a horrible kid! She's anything but that! Anything! You haven't seen her for _years_ how do you know she's the horrible kid you think she is? Has she _ever_ been?"

"Of course she has!"

"Tell me something terrible she's done - other than the accident you _think_ she caused."

"Well… well… back when she was five…err… Okay, Sirius, I can't name any, but that doesn't excuse her from what-"

"From what you _think_ she did!" Mrs. Lupin didn't know what to say. When she invited James and Sirius over she didn't ever dream that she would be arguing with one of them… and here she was, arguing with a twelve year old. "You just think she's terrible! But she isn't, she's as far away from terrible as you can get!"

All in all, Sirius won the arguement, which quite shocked Remus and James. Never had they heard Sirius speak so passionately about something. When James and Sirius went to bed Remus was forced to apologise for Sirius's behaviour. But if he wasn't forced to he wouldn't have because Sirius was right… his sister wasn't to blame.


	26. I Don't Like Mondays

Chapter Twenty Six  
I Don't Like Mondays

"_I don't like Mondays_… no that's terrible! I'm never going to get this right!" Rachael banged the back of her head against the wall in frustration and looked at the lyrics she was supposed to be learning. Once she signed up for the talent show and Ms. Marshall discovered this she immediately suggested this song, saying it was very good. Rachael read the lyrics and had to agree. If only she could hear the music for it, it would probably be better. But she had to wait for the piano to come into use. It was being hogged at the moment.

Becky's two former friends were claiming they could sing better than anyone else in the orphanage. And they were keeping the piano to themselves so they could practise every minute of every hour of every day so that no one else could use it. Rachael read the chorus of the song again. How was she going to learn it without music? She banged her head again.

"Hmm… okay I'll try it again." The door to her room opened and Becky came strolling in. "Never mind," Rachael muttered, taking the lyrics and placing them under her pillow. Rachael leaned back on her pillow and took a rubber ball out of her pocket and began to toss it up and down, looking as though that was what she had been doing the whole time.

"The piano's free, you know," Becky called from below.

Rachael sat up and pocketed the ball. "Took long enough," she said.

"Go get it before they can get back to it."

Rachael wasted no time at all. She jumped off her bed and ran down the hallway into the music room where she found Ms. Marshall sitting at the piano. She was looking over some music and placing it messily inside a folder, dropping it carelessly on the floor, all the while muttering under her breath. Rachael grinned. She knew Ms. Marshall was muttering about Brenda and Brandy. They had Ms. Marshall playing the piano for them and neither of them had talent when it came to vocals. They both had terrible singing voices. Rachael knew this for a fact. She sat up on the balcony above them and listened. It was worse than listening to a Banshee shriek.

Rachael walked in, stepping over some trumpet and trombone cases. "Ms. Marshall?" she asked quietly. Ms. Marshall looked up from the bag she was leaning over and raised an eyebrow. "Is it alright if I go over my song with music?"

"Of course, hopefully it'll be a nice switch from those two," Ms. Marshall answered bitterly.

Rachael didn't need to ask whom 'those two' meant, it was obvious. Rachael handed Ms. Marshall the sheet music she had been given and took the lyrics for herself and began. Rachael had to admit; Ms. Marshall was a wonderful piano player. Being a musician was something that Rachael used to think her personal instructor wasn't capable of.

"…_The whole day down_…" she finished.

Ms. Marshall rounded off the end with some slow playing and it was over. Rachael didn't think she had done very well. She was a bit shaky in the second chorus and she knew Ms. Marshall would tell her she was. "Very good," her instructor said in an almost awed voice.

"But I messed up," Rachael argued.

"Yes, yes but it was hardly noticeable."

Rachael raised an eyebrow but didn't question her any further; she thought it was good at least. Rachael folded up the lyrics into fours and pocketed them. She made to leave when Ms. Marshall stopped her.

"You sing very well," she said. "Has anyone ever told that?"

Rachael nodded. "My mum and dad used to say that they could sit for hours listening to me. It's weird my mother would actually say something like that."

Ms. Marshall gave a weak smile. Any mention of Rachael's mother, especially by Rachael herself, was always enough to set her on edge. But this time she tried her best to brush it off and went on. "Yes, well, they're right," she said kindly. "Much better than those two girls who were here all day! Wretched voices."

Rachael gave a quick laugh. She wanted to leave, but she needed to ask something. "Why'd you pick this song for me?"

"That's a very… interesting… question. Well I've always liked this song, it only came out recently. It reminded me of the day you came here, a Monday. And if you haven't noticed you're always in a bad mood on Mondays."

Rachael nodded. She did have a tendency to be a bit irritable on Mondays. She never knew why until this very moment. It was a reason… a really good one…. Why wouldn't she be upset on the day when her father dropped her off at this building and never came back for her? But _every_ Monday…?

"This song just reminds me of you, for some reason. That's why I wanted you to sing it… So do your best and make us proud."

* * *

Remus awoke the next morning to find outside of his window black skies. At first he thought it was still night time. But when he looked at his clock he saw it was nine in the morning. He rolled, literally, out of bed and onto the floor with a loud thud. He picked himself up and went to see if his friends were up yet. He crept slowly down the hall to his sister's room, making sure not to wake his mother who was still sound asleep.

He poked his head through the open doorway to see James sitting up on his bed and looking around the room, obviously having just woken up, as his eyes were still a bit dazed. Remus knocked softly on the door, seeing that Sirius was asleep.

"Morning," he said to James, rubbing some sleep out of his eyes.

"Morning," said James brightly. _Why was he always such a morning person?_

"I see Sirius isn't up yet." Remus nodded his head over to Sirius, who was half dangling off his bed and leaving a puddle of drool on the floor.

James smiled. "This kid sleeps like a rock! I kicked him in the head by accident when I woke up and he didn't move!"

Remus's eyes brightened. "I have an idea." He tiptoed over towards Sirius and slowly placed his hands on Sirius's side. He gave him a gentle, but forceful, push and Sirius felt sideways onto the floor and hit his head on the floor.

"OW!"

James and Remus burst out in a silent fit of laughs as Sirius reappeared from the middle of the two beds, rubbing his head.

"Thank you, Remus," he said sarcastically. "I needed that wake up call."

"Any time," Remus said falling back into a mocking bow.

Sirius rubbed his head and, took his pillow and flung it at Remus. He caught it and chucked it back at his friend, missing Sirius and hitting James instead. James snatched the pillow off the bed and flung it back at Remus. Remus ducked his head sideways and the pillow hit the wall, knocking over a family picture from five years ago that his sister had hung up. Remus fell to the floor and caught it before it could break.

"I think that's enough," he said lightly, hanging the picture back up and straightening it. "Wouldn't want to destroy the house on your second day here, would you?"

"Nah," said Sirius, smiling. "We'll save that for our third day."

Once they were dressed they went downstairs to see Remus's mum reading the newspaper. She said a bitter good morning to them as they came into the room. She was still upset about arguing with a twelve year old, and losing the arguement.

Remus suggested they go out and go down docks, once the sky cleared up, where they could watch all the boats come in. He loved going down there when he was younger because the fisherman would give him and his sister a fishing pole from their boats and let them fish. Nowadays he usually had to steal one when they weren't looking.

* * *

It was the day of the talent show and Rachael had spent most of her day reading over her song. Although she had to go through it with music in her mind as, yet again, Brenda and Brandy were keeping the piano all to themselves. She had tried countless times to lure them away. She would casually walk into the music room and say that their crushes, James Finch and Greg Monte, were looking for them. But of course they knew it was a lie because those two never acknowledged their existence.

So Rachael never got to touch the piano to go over her music. She was just going to have to go for it with only one day worth of practise. She would be sure everyone would understand. After they all listened to Brenda and Brandy, they'd be begging for a change. She smiled at the thought of her two worst enemies struggling through a hard song. She had gathered they were planning to sing the song "Help" by the Beatles. They certainly needed _help_ singing.

She sat down on the floor of her room in the corner and leaned her head against the wall. She was a bit nervous despite the fact that she had sung in front of people so many times. It was just she was very out of practise and what if she did worse than the two least talented people in the building? That would be so embarrassing she might have to resort to locking herself in her room until school started. But, then again, they were as terrible as you can get, she wouldn't do worse than them.

* * *

"There's a rod right there!"

"Where?"

"There! The one I'm pointing to"

"Where?"

Remus gave a frustrated sigh. He plucked Sirius up from his hiding spot behind a crate and pulled him over to a fishing rod lying uselessly on the ground right next to the river, and stuck his face right in front of it. "There!"

Sirius's eyes brightened and he mouthed 'oh.' Remus rolled his eyes and snatched the rod up before the fisherman could catch him. Normally Remus would never have to hide behind the crates and wait for hours on end to snatch a fishing rod. He could just go up to one of the workers and ask them for one and they would gladly give him one. But after he received his bite even the fisherman knew something was wrong with him just by how pale and peaky he looked. Remus lived in a village where if there was something wrong with you, you might as well be packing right now.

Out of breath, Remus and Sirius rejoined James behind the crate they were ducking behind and placed the rod they had snatched next to the first one they took.

"Don't you have any at home?" James asked irritably. He wasn't keen on stealing them. "I thought you did this all the time."

Remus nodded agreeably. "Yeah I do. I just get caught every time and then get a nice lecture for an hour," he answered bitterly.

"Why can't you just buy one?" Sirius asked, falling out of the way of a hairy spider that had scuttled across his feet. Remus glared at him. Sirius knew perfectly well Remus couldn't afford to get a fishing rod.

After waiting for another hour Remus began to realise that the fisherman weren't going to leave any more rods on the docks. Or at least they were becoming aware of the boys' presence. Declaring defeat, Remus placed the rods on the hiding crate and led James and Sirius out of the docks.

"What have I told you about taking our tools?" came an angry voice from behind Remus. The boys spun around and saw a stout, grizzly looking man bending over them, fury in his eyes.

"Well I - I," Remus stammered, eyeing the man nervously.

"You were what? Gonna take 'em and keep 'em?" the man questioned furiously, advancing on the boys with every word he spoke.

"Well not _keep_ them…"

"Oh yes you were! You know that every time you come here we catch you and you get in trouble but you still come back!"

"You _used_ to let me use them."

"Keyword boy! _Used _to, not anymore, now get on home before you get yourself in any more trouble!"

* * *

Rachael stood behind the curtains of the newly installed stage in the courtyard of the orphanage. The staff had spent the entire day putting it in, waking up at four in the morning and working until six in the evening, an hour before the show would start. Right now it was seven thirty and she was going on right after this act, Brenda and Brandy. Before she put her earplugs in, she heard just how horrible their voices were when they were singing with full force. It much resembled the scraping of nails against a chalkboard… purely sickening.

She peered out the curtains and looked at the rows of orphans and staff members that had come to watch the show. All of them were either pretending to enjoy it, though failing dismally due to the fact that their faces were squinted and they kept lifting their hands to their ears and dropping them. She could hardly blame them. She pitied them, coming there without earplugs; not knowing how badly damaged their ear drums were going to be.

Unfortunately she had to remove her earplugs in order to hear when they called her name to go up and sing. Thus she was forced to weather the horrible voices of Brandy and Brenda. Finally they were finished and got a loud round of applause, not for their "talent" but for the fact that they were finished.

"Next we have," said Mrs. Ramben, ushering the two girls, who were taking their time bowing deeply, "Rachael Lupin singing 'I Don't Like Mondays'." With a polite round of applause she walked onto the stage and waited for Ms. Marshall to begin.

"_I want to shoot the whole day down."_

Rachael looked at the audience amazed, they were all on their feet, applauding as hard as they could, some even whistling through their teeth. She smiled and bowed, walking off the stage. She had done it… they loved it.

* * *

Author's Note: The song "I Don't Like Mondays" belongs to Bob Geldolf.


	27. Diagon Alley

Chapter Twenty Seven  
Diagon Alley

Before Remus knew it, it was two days before James and Sirius would be heading home, which also meant it was time for a full moon. The day of the full moon he woke up feeling exceptionally groggy and unwilling to get out of bed. He could have stayed in that same spot all day. But he knew he couldn't do it so, with great effort, he rolled himself out of bed and onto the floor. Picking himself up and rubbing his head, he walked out into the hallway to see James and Sirius heading his way, both looking disheveled. Remus knew he must look the same; they had all gotten to sleep late the night before.

Remus's mum had given him a few Muggle dollars and he and his friends went down to the old movie house. They spent a good four hours sitting through two movies, both of which were rather boring. But they couldn't leave no matter how much they wanted to. As it was a double feature they were seeing and his mum knew it, she would be disappointed if he wasted her money and they came back after only sitting through the movies for five minutes. Thus they were forced to sit through four hours of torture.

"Morning," James said, stretching his arms out behind his back, almost hitting Sirius, who jumped backwards.

"Morning," Remus answered, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. They went down to the kitchen so Remus could check the time, it was well past noon.

The boys decided to spend their day inside the house, despite that it was a glorious day out. It wasn't too hot, it wasn't too cold, the birds were chirping in the trees and there was a slight breeze ruffling the grass. But, as it was a full moon that night, Remus was feeling much too ill to go outside. So they spent their time playing some Gobstones, Wizards Chess and one game of Exploding Snap, which, of course, Remus won.

As the day wore on and the full moon drew nearer there wasn't much to do. Remus wouldn't eat dinner and James and Sirius felt guilty about eating. So they avoided the dinner table and sat in the living room, talking occasionally but not much.

"So what do we do now?" Sirius asked James as they sat in Rachael's old room. It was nighttime and Mrs. Lupin had locked Remus in his room for the full moon.

James shrugged. "I dunno, just stay in here I guess."

And so they did. They passed a good ten minutes by looking in Rachael's old toy box, playing with her old stuffed animals. Right when they came upon the stuffed wolf they heard a low groan of pain coming from Remus's room. The two boys looked at each other quickly.

"Want to go see?" James asked nervously. Sirius nodded, a bit hesitantly. The two of them went down to Remus's room and sat in front of the door, fighting to look through the keyhole. Eventually Sirius won the fight, only after pushing James against the wall behind them.

"It was pointless trying to see," said Sirius, after thirty seconds of looking through the keyhole, only to see nothing but blackness. "Can't see a thing!"

James crawled back over towards the door and pressed his ear up against it. He could hear moans of pain. He cringed listening to his friend in such pain. It went on for at least three minutes before they could hear growling approaching the door and scratching sounds. Remus was trying to get out.

James and Sirius looked at each other and slowly backed away from the door.

"Boys," came the voice of Mrs. Lupin from behind them. They looked up to see her standing over them. "I think you should leave Remus alone."

The boys nodded and quickly ran to their room.

* * *

"Hey, Remus!" said James the next morning. He and Sirius had been sitting downstairs at the kitchen table waiting for Remus to wake up. At noon Remus had come stumbling down the stairs, looking by far the worst they had ever seen him. His sandy brown hair was tossed messily about his head. His eyes were red and bloodshot. He had scrapes all over his face and his arms and he seemed to be nursing a bite on his hand.

"Hi," he said tiredly, walking over to the counter and grabbing some paper towels and wrapping them around his hand. He took the empty seat across from James and threw himself in it. "I got kind of hungry during the night," he said trying to make a joke, but knew it wasn't funny.

Sirius, however, tried to laugh at it. "Obviously," he said, eyeing Remus's bite. "So, what d'you want to do today?"

Remus shrugged. "I dunno, just hang out I guess."

* * *

After the talent show Rachael's reputation increased all for the better. Much to Rachael's delight, Brenda and Brandy became the least liked people in the entire building. Actually they already were, but now people weren't afraid of showing how much they disliked them. Brenda and Brandy were beginning to get a feel of how it was like to be Rachael. Everywhere they went evil glares followed them and quite a few times they had been locked in the utility closet until one of the janitors discovered them in there.

Rachael knew it was wrong but she had to laugh at it all. It was nice to see them in the misery they put her through for all those years. Though every time she walked by them, grinning from ear to ear, she did feel a bit guilty, but brushed the feeling off quickly. They didn't feel guilty when she almost killed herself because of what they did to her. They laughed their heads off about it. Becky, on the other hand, did feel guilty the night Rachael decided to tell her what she had done, with different details of course.

"I almost killed myself because of you three!" Rachael had yelled when Becky said they hadn't been that mean to her.

Becky jumped. "What're you talking about?" she said.

"You people caused me so much misery I had to do it!" Rachael yelled, doing some very quick thinking. "I just took a knife and almost did it! You don't know how close I was!"

"If you were so close why didn't you do it?"

Rachael couldn't believe she was asking this in a voice of mixed hilarity and mockery. "Because Ms. Marshall stopped me before I could! If she didn't I wouldn't even be here talking to you!"

Becky fell silent; she looked as though she were trying to say something. And it looked like it was really important for her to say it. But she never said it. Instead she got up, nodded at Rachael, but not looking at her and left the room.

After that Rachael just sat up on her bed staring at the ceiling, wondering what Becky wanted to say. Had she possibly thought that what Rachael had done was overreacting and completely stupid? But it wasn't. She had felt so miserable, so horrible, she just needed to end it all, and she almost did. But what if Ms. Marshall hadn't stopped her? What if she hadn't gotten there in time? Well she wouldn't be there anymore, would she? But how would her family react?

Remus would be devastated of course. When she had last seen him he was feeling terrible. What would have happened to him then if she had succeeded in what she wanted to do? She didn't even want to imagine it. Her dad… he would have thought he didn't get her in time that he failed as a father. He had been trying to get her back, trying as hard as he could. He would think he didn't make it in time to take her and raise her. Her mother….

Would her mother finally realise the mistake she had made? Would she suddenly stop and let reality show her what she had done? After all the years of detesting her daughter for something she didn't do, would she finally come to her senses and break down? Seeing for the first time what she had done? Maybe she would… Maybe she would at last see what she had done. Rachael knew something like that would make her mother come to her senses. It would make her love her daughter again.

And that was when Rachael finally realised… _if something bad happened to me… if something really horrible… If I was like Remus…

* * *

_

Diagon Alley, one part of the Wizarding world that wizards have to go to at least once in their life, whether it be for work, or just to hang out in the pub. But for the most part it was to get their supplies for the coming year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Today was the day Rachael was heading to the alley to get her new books for school. All she needed was a new Transfiguration book and another Charms textbook. She could also do with some new quills and ink and she needed to get more potion supplies.

As she and Ms. Marshall stepped through the doorway to the alley, her personal instructor immediately turned to go down to the Magical Menagerie, having stated that she wanted to look at some of the creatures there. Rachael was fine with it of course. She fancied getting to wander up and down the street by herself. Maybe she would spot her best friend, Lily Evans, there. She went to the potions store first, gathered a few items and paid, then down to get some quills and ink and finally off to Flourish and Blotts to get her new books for the coming year.

She entered the shop to find it packed with students and their parents, quite different from how she found it the year before when she had come with Ms. Marshall. When she had went last year the entire building smelled like rotten dragon eggs and she had gotten the books free because she was brave enough to go in there and endure the smell. She had to fight her way through the chattering crowds to get to the Transfiguration books. When she finally arrived at the stand that said "Transfiguration" she realised they were all gone.

"Looking for one of these?" asked a playful voice from behind her.

Rachael turned around to see Sirius standing behind her and dangling a Transfiguration book in front of her nose. She snatched it from him and muttered, "Thanks."

"Saw you coming this way so figured I get it for you," he explained, tucking his own textbook under his arm.

"Well, thanks again," said Rachael, smiling.

"Here by yourself?" Sirius asked as they made their way over to the Charms textbooks.

"No, Ms. Marshall's around here somewhere but she let me go off by myself."

Sirius raised an eyebrow.

"Which would mean I'm here by myself, yeah you're right."

Sirius laughed. "Ah I'm here by myself too. My mum wouldn't be caught dead here with the likes of me. All day I'd hear 'why can't you be more like your brother?' Over and over and over until someone stapled her mouth shut!"

"How is your brother anyway?" Rachael asked, not really hoping his brother was well. Sirius's little brother Regulus was exactly what Sirius's parents would call 'the perfect son.' An evil little pureblood crazed child, whereas Sirius couldn't care less whether his best friends had red or green blood. That was why Sirius's mother wouldn't walk around with him in public, in fear of humiliating herself. Rachael couldn't understand that. Sirius was such a nice kid, his mother should have been proud. But, then again, she never did understand the way a mother's mind worked….

"Annoying. Playing around with his wand and looking up the Unforgivable Curses. A perfect Black. Come on, let's go pay for these."

They fought their way through the ever growing crowd, nearly getting squashed by an overweight old lady who went clambering past them. Finally they reached the front counter where they were more than happy to rush out of their once their books were paid for.

"It's a mad house in there!" Sirius exclaimed, watching the shop through the window.

"Everyone's got to get their books," said Rachel sensibly. "Dunno why though. They're as dull as dirt."

They began up the street, walking aimlessly, looking in the shop windows. Really they were just passing the time until their guardians came to pick them up, not that either of them was looking forward to it. Rachael was listening to Sirius's tale about how their most recent house elf, Leechy, had finally decided enough was enough and keeled over right when he and his family was having dinner. His mother screamed so loudly as it happened that he swore people in America could hear it.

They had to stop dinner, and clear all the dishes because no one was going to want to eat after what was going to happen. Sirius had to watched his dad chop off the house elf's head right there in the kitchen. Blood splattered all over the walls, the chairs, the floors, on Sirius, and basically every place within reach. It was purely sickening, as Sirius put it.

"Ew," said Rachael, cringing in disgust. "They had to do it right there?" Sirius nodded. "No offense, but your family is a bit weird."

"No offense taken! My family's off their rockers. Decapitating house elves, that creepy family tree of theirs, yeah my family is one piece of work!"

They continued up the street, every now and then spotting someone from school and stopping to talk with them. So far they had met up with their fellow second year and Gryffindor, Frank Longbottom and their fellow second year, but who was in Ravenclaw, Alex Anderson. They only stopped a bit to talk with him, as their time was getting short and they would have to be heading back to the Leaky Cauldron. As they were walking back to the Leaky Cauldron, Rachael was entertaining Sirius with a long winded tale about how Brenda and Brandy humiliated themselves at the talent show by making every one try to sit there without wanting to rip their ears out.

"They sound like lovely girls," said Sirius sarcastically after Rachael told them about how they pulled the ladder out from under her bunk and she broke her wrists because of it. She had only gotten the casts removed the day before. They entered the Leaky Cauldron to see Ms. Marshall sitting at the bar, having what seemed to be a lively conversation with the innkeeper, Tom. She and Sirius walked over and sat down on the two stools next to her and waited for her to notice them.

As she was turning to get a drink from her goblet she spotted them, whom both had their noses dug in the menus, pretending that they were ordering something.

"Back already?" she sniffed.

"Already? It's six already," said Rachael, pointing to her watch.

Ms. Marshall nodded and her eyes darted to Sirius. "Is this a friend?" she asked.

"Yep," said Rachael happily. "Ms. Marshall, meet Sirius Black. Sirius Black, meet Ms. Marshall."

Sirius reached across the table and shook Ms. Marshall's hand politely and muttering a nice to meet you. Ms. Marshall wanted to finish her drink and conversation with the innkeeper, so Sirius and Rachael took to walking around the pub while Sirius waited for his mother to meet him there.

They took one of the empty tables near the fireplace and watched two old men talking about the werewolf registration system at the Ministry of Magic. They were saying that it was pure idiocy to even have one because the werewolves might not register themselves in fear of not being able to get jobs if they were bitten when they were kids or if they were bitten when they were adults they might lose the job they had.

"Is Remus registered?" Sirius asked once the two men had cleaned up their table and made their way to the exit.

"Yeah," said Rachael, grabbing a stick next to the fire and poking some of the logs. "I dunno what they were talking about. Once we left St. Mungo's my mum wasn't going to make him register but the Ministry sent us an owl saying it was mandatory. There's no way to keep them from not knowing."

"So then what were they going on about?"

"Who knows?"

They spent a good ten minutes arguing because after Rachael told Sirius about the talent show he kept trying to make her sing, but she refused. Of course Sirius, being the persistent kid he was, kept trying to force her into it. But Rachael was just as stubborn as Sirius was persistent. Finally Sirius gave up saying that he'd already heard her anyway from the home videos they had found.

"Sirius," said a sharp voice behind them. They both looked to see a middle age, particularly ugly woman. She was staring down at Sirius with narrowed eyes and an expression of the utmost dislike, and Sirius, Rachael could see, was fighting the urge to look at the woman the same. This must have been his mother….

"Yes, Mother?" Sirius answered in a considerably cold voice.

"It's time for you to leave," she told him. She picked him up by his arm and lifted him out of his chair. She dragged him to the fire place where she sprinkled Floo Powder over the flames, making them ignite emerald. She stepped into the flames and shouted, "Number Twelve Grimmauld Place" and vanished from sight.

"See you at Hogwarts," Sirius muttered, dropping powder into the fire and vanishing.


	28. First Day Back and Already Problems

Chapter Twenty Eight  
First Day Back and Already Problems

"Okay, textbooks… quills… ink… all over my bed, oops… well I have it anyway… homework… That's it, I think."

It was the final day of Rachael's summer holiday and she was sitting on the floor of her room, gathering the remainders of her school supplies. She folded up her last pair of robes and tucked them neatly in her trunk before lifting up her trunk and placing it at the end of her bed.

"All packed to leave?" said Becky, just coming in from dinner.

Rachael wasn't very hungry so she had spent dinnertime in her room packing and feeding Emerald some owl treats to keep her from hooting too loudly. "Yep," she said, pulling a few more owl treats out of her pocket and stuffing them in Emerald's cage. "Train leaves tomorrow and so will I."

* * *

Rachael sat in an empty compartment on the Hogwarts Express the next day, waiting for one of her friends to come and join her. But, as she looked out the window, they were nowhere in sight. Of course that made perfect sense; it would be a little odd for her friends to come to the platform an hour and a half early like she did. But she had to. Ms. Marshall was to be doing some important business at the orphanage and had to drop Rachael off early in order to get back on time.

She leaned back in her seat and absentmindedly stroked Emerald, whom she had let out of her cage before the train started to move to allow her to stretch out her wings before the long ride. She couldn't wait to see Lily. She hadn't talked to her all summer. Lily went on vacation to America and she told Rachael not to owl her because she didn't want Emerald to get tired on the way there. So she refrained from owling Lily about anything during the summer.

She hadn't talked to James either, since her owl didn't know where he lived and neither did she, but, then again, James didn't owl her either. She knew it was pointless in even attempting to owl Remus after the first owl she sent him. She had only spoken to Sirius, even though it was just for one day. She felt bad for him to have a mother like that. She was so creepy looking and didn't even let Sirius introduce her to her, Rachael; it was just 'it's time for you to leave!'

People like that just made Rachael's blood boil. It was no wonder that Sirius never spoke about his family, and when he did it was in a bitter, cold voice. Just from listening to his mother speak a few words to him; she knew that she couldn't blame him for speaking like that about them. Then again, she could really relate with that, having Mrs. Lupin for a mother had everything but upsides. But at least she had a kind father. She could only imagine that if Sirius's mother was like that, then his father must be ten times worse.

She stared out the window and saw groups of students and their parents slowly coming through the barrier and onto the platform. She pressed her face up against the screen to see if she recognised any of them. So far all she saw were some older kids who looked to be sixth or seventh years. She spotted her fellow second year Alex Anderson, and coming out of the barrier behind him and stopping him to talk was her fellow Gryffindor, Frank Longbottom.

She watched as the two drifted off towards the back of the train and turned her attention back to the students who were now coming in alarming rates. She spotted a few Hufflepuffs that she knew were second years but she couldn't remember their names. She saw her friend Alice Gordon coming onto the platform. Rachael knocked on the window, catching her friend's attention and waved to her. She watched Alice disappear to her left and saw Remus walking onto the platform with their mother. She unlatched the window of her compartment and pulled it down to listen.

"Have a good term," her mother said, giving Remus a hug.

"Right, Mum," he said, hugging her back halfheartedly.

"Remember, Remus-"

"Yes, yes I know, 'steer clear of your sister'."

"That's right! Now I'll be leaving."

"Yeah bye… like I'm going to listen to her."

Rachael quickly closed the window and threw herself back in her seat as though she hadn't listened to a word of the conversation. She was sitting for only a minute before she heard her compartment door slide open and Remus came staggering in. Rachael hadn't noticed when she was looking down on the platform, but her brother looked terrible. His eyes were red, he had several scratches on his face, a nice bite on both of his hands and it looked like it were causing him a great effort just to remain standing.

"Sit, Remus!" she said.

Remus was only too glad to oblige his sister's order. He stumbled over into the seat across from her and dropped himself in it. "Hi," he mumbled.

"Hi," she said, watching him a bit nervously. "You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine… just a bit tired I guess," he said, holding back a yawn.

"It was a full moon last night?"

"Yeah, it was really bad."

Rachael decided not to question him further. He really looked like he needed sleep. They spent a few minutes talking about their summers while they waited for James, Sirius and Peter. But before they even arrived Remus was fast asleep. Rachael just looked out the window, breaking her gaze to give her owl some treats so she didn't wake Remus up with her excessive hooting.

"Hullo!" said a bright voice from the compartment door.

Rachael turned to see James and Sirius standing at the compartment doorway. Apparently it was James who had spoken. "Hi," she said in a hushed voice.

"Mind if we sit here?"

"Do you guys really need to ask?"

The boys laughed and James took the seat next to a sleeping Remus and Sirius took the seat next to Rachael.

"What's up with Remus?" asked James, poking Remus in the back.

"James, leave him alone," said Sirius, already knowing what was wrong. "Full moon was last night, wasn't it?"

Rachael nodded. They talked for a little in whispers that were barely audible over Remus's loud snores. "So," she said slowly. "How were your summers?"

"Okay," said James. "Nothing great, just spent a week at my grandmother's before I came here, kind of like spending it in the Muggle military. My grandfather had me up at dawn doing pushups."

"Pushups?" laughed Sirius.

"Don't ask."

Sirius and Rachael laughed at the thought of James, who was such a morning person, up at the crack of dawn and doing pushups. James and Sirius started telling Rachael about their stay at her old house and telling her about the home movies they found up in the attic. Rachael, like Remus, didn't remember ever having home videos, let alone knowing what they were.

"Very interesting," James said. "Remus actually thought he was you in one of them."

"I dunno if I should take that as an insult or not," said Rachael thoughtfully.

As the day wore on several students visited them from their year, along with Peter Pettigrew who stayed with them once he arrived at the compartment. Rachael's best friend Lily Evans came to their compartment for a good twenty minutes. After that she left because James was bothering her, as she put it. Alice Gordon and Frank Longbottom paid them a visit a little while after the lunch trolley appeared and they shared a few chocolate frogs with him.

"Should we wake him up?" asked Peter, jerking his head towards Remus, who was still huddled up in the corner of his seat, fast asleep.

Rachael shook her head. "Nah, let him sleep," she said, ripping open a pack of Bertie Botts Every Flavour Beans.

They passed the time trading wizard cards and playing a few matches of Exploding Snap, taking advantage of the fact that Remus was sleeping and couldn't massacre them like he usually would.

After a few matches, in which Sirius won two games and James won the other, and Rachael and Peter's faces were covered in soot, the compartment door slid opened and in stalked the last person any of them wanted to see.

"Hullo," sneered Severus Snape.

"Oh goody!" said Rachael in a mock gleeful voice.

"Just the person we wanted to see," said Sirius, pulling a fake smile.

Snape smirked at Sirius and sat down next to Peter, who quickly jumped out of his place next to James and jumped on the other side of Sirius. James, who didn't want to be sitting next to his least favourite person, leapt out of his seat and took the empty space next to Peter, leaving Snape sitting next to a still slumbering Remus.

"What's up with him?" Snape asked, poking Remus, hard, in the back. Remus didn't wake up, but shifted slightly in his seat.

"None of your business, Snape!" Rachael snapped.

"Looks like he's been hit by a truck," said Snape viciously, poking Remus even harder. Rachael, James, Sirius and Peter looked at each other. Snape wasn't going to give up.

"Snape, just leave him alone," James muttered menacingly.

Snape just smiled his disturbing smile and continued poking Remus. After a couple of hard pokes in between the shoulder blades Remus's eyelids flickered open and he turned his head slightly to see, much to his horror, Snape sitting next to him. Remus slid off his seat and scrambled backwards next to his sister, who moved over to make room for him.

"What's he doing in here?" Remus hissed.

"The usual," answered Sirius bitterly, "bugging us."

Without another word Snape exited the compartment. The five eyed him strangely as his robes whipped out of sight.

"That was fascinating," Sirius said, giving a long whistle.

* * *

"Welcome! Welcome to another year at Hogwarts," said Dumbledore over the Great Hall. "Now I feel that after a long train ride, I can make you wait a few minutes longer to eat." Professor Dumbledore smiled as he listened to the annoyed groans from his students. "Or we can eat right now!" With the wave of the hand the golden platters on the four house tables filled with food.

Immediately all the students began loading their plates up with every type of food within reach.

"Finally!" said Peter, happily putting some roast potatoes on his plate. "I'm starving." James and Sirius caught each other's eye, but avoided laughing.

"Hey," said Remus suddenly. "Where's Dad?"

The others turned to see Remus was sitting on his knees to see over to the staff table where it was clear that their dad wasn't there.

"That's weird," Rachael muttered. "Wonder where he is?"

Not even a second after she said that the Great Hall doors opened and her father came rushing in. There were a few turns of the head to see who had come in. But mostly every student was too immersed in the feast to give the newcomer in the hall a second thought. Professor Lupin came rushing up the hall, stopping at the Gryffindor table to give Remus and Rachael a hug hullo and then up to the staff table where he apologised to Dumbledore for being late.

"That's strange," said Remus, who was watching his father settle himself in the empty seat between Professor McGonagall and Professor Flitwick. Remus shrugged and returned back to his dinner, knowing that his father would eventually tell them the reason for his lateness.

They spent the rest of the feast talking about the upcoming year, about each other's summers, just the usual things to pass the time.

"Sirius, do you _have_ to talk about the house elf while we're eating?" asked Rachael exasperatedly, breaking off her conversation with Lily as Sirius went into deep detail about the beheading of the house elf Leechy. Sirius shrugged and continued his conversation about the elf, making it less gruesome then it was. Rachael nodded and turned back to Lily.

Rachael was listening to Lily's tale about how during the summer she and her sister got into a big arguement because her older sister, Petunia, was calling her a freak every second she could get and Lily had had enough of it. So, as a little revenge, Lily took her pet owl, Rosey, and let her loose in her sister's room when her sister was out on a date with a boy that Lily described as an elephant that has been taught to walk on his hind legs. All she knew about the boy, other than what he looked like, was that his name was Vernon.

When Petunia returned from her date she discovered Rosey had left her several presents in several well-hidden places. Petunia took one horrified look at her room, let out a terrible shriek of, "FREAK!" and ran out of the room at full speed.

"Music to my ears."

* * *

"Right so we've got Transfiguration first… Can you believe how much work she gave us over the break?" Sirius whined as he read the schedule Professor McGonagall had just handed him. When Sirius said this, Rachael could swear she saw Professor McGonagall stop and smile triumphantly, but maybe she had just imagined it. "After that we have Charms, Flitwick gave us a lot of work too… Why do the teachers torture us like this?"

"Please finish reading this _today_," said Remus sarcastically.

"You read it then!"

"I will. After Charms, double Potions with the Ravenclaws, then Herbology, lunch and History of Magic. There said simply and without whining."

Sirius shoved Remus in the shoulder and they returned to their breakfast. Rachael set her fork down and looked up at the staff table. Her dad was sitting in between Professor McGonagall and Professor Flitwick, not talking to either one of them. As a matter of fact, he wasn't even eating. She wondered what could be wrong… Why had he been late for the feast? And, according to Remus, her father had _actually_ been talking to their mother. What was going on?

Her dad looked up from his plate, caught his daughter's eye and smiled. Rachael returned the smile, though it was uneasy. She shrugged it off. He would probably talk to her about it eventually… at least she hoped he would. Rachael looked towards the front door to see Lily walking in, followed closely by James, who seemed to be talking at a very swift pace and was jogging behind Lily. Rachael looked around the table; she hadn't even noticed James was missing.

She, Remus, Sirius and Peter watched this rather amusing scene. Lily was walking at almost a run while James was doing his best to keep up with her. At first they weren't able to hear what James was saying. But as they drew nearer to the table they could catch phrases of what he was saying.

"Please, Lily!" he said in a desperate tone.

"No, Potter!" Lily huffed, trying to shake James off.

"Please!"

"Do you understand the word no?"

James stopped talking and walking to just stand there with his mouth hanging open. He shook his head and retreated to the empty seat beside Peter. Remus and Sirius exchanged quick glances at each other, clearly communicating the word "pathetic" with each other.

James looked up at them. "She knows she likes me," he said confidently.

His friends found it best not to answer that question. They really couldn't break it to him that she despised everything about him from the tip of his untidy hair down to the very point of his biggest toe. Rachael could hardly believe James hadn't gotten the idea that Lily hated him. Lily had told Rachael countless times that she did. But of course Rachael couldn't tell James that, it would crush him. So she would just let James figure it out himself.

She ate one last forkful of eggs and gathered up her books.

"Going to class already?" Sirius asked, looking up from his own breakfast.

"Yeah," Rachael answered airily. "Figure, get there early and finish my Transfiguration assignment, just have to add one more sentence." Rachael gathered up her books and trudged out of the Great Hall and up towards the third floor to the Transfiguration classroom. As she climbed up the steps leading towards the second floor she heard the petrified shriek of a female… one who was unmistakable. Walking a little further, in the direction towards the girls' bathroom she saw none other than Moaning Myrtle shrieking and floating towards the first floor. She only stopped right as she was about to float through Rachael, who bent over backwards to avoid it.

"What's going on?" Rachael answered, standing up straight.

"It's Peeves!" Myrtle shrieked. "He's destroying the girls' bathroom!"

"Pity…" said Rachael in a false concerned voice. No one even went in that bathroom anyway due to Myrtle's consistent sobbing, making it a pain to go to the bathroom. "Oh well! Transfiguration class awaits!" And she began to set off at a run down towards the next stairwell, only to be stopped by the cackling poltergeist, Peeves. Rachael hadn't realised she had taken a wrong turn and discovered herself standing in front of a flooded girls' bathroom. So there was the destruction…

Peeves was laughing madly as he observed his work. "Oh such a beeeuteeful sight!" he howled, as he swirled back into the bathroom to turn on a few more taps on the sink and watched adoringly as waterfalls of water spilled down onto the floor.

Rachael jumped backwards and picked up the hem of her robes so they didn't get wet. Peeves did a back flip out of the bathroom. As he was twirling back the right way he stopped right in front of Rachael, who was watching this whole scene with slight amusement. "Why lookie!" he cried gleefully. "'Tis Missy Lupy! Looney Loopy Lupin!" he sang, doing several cartwheels.

Rachael smirked. "Yes that's me," she said, playing along. "Looney Loopy Lupin. Least I'm not Pitiful Pathetic Peeves."

Peeves stopped right in the middle of his cartwheel. "Pitiful Pathetic Peeves?" he said in a highly dramatic voice. "That's not very nice! For a Loopy Lupin you're not very nice."

"Shame, isn't it?"

"Oh yes! 'Tis a shame… shame for you. Have fun swimming!"

"Swimming? Wha-?" but before she could do anything else, the rug she was standing on was pulled out from under her and she slid into the bathroom and into the flood of water. She landed face first into the river and listened angrily as Peeves floated away, cackling at the top of his voice.

"Idiot poltergeist," she muttered in an off voice, as she was talking under water. She picked herself up, slipping on the hem of her robes and falling backwards into the water again. Cursing under her breath, she carefully picked herself up. Drenched from head to foot, she trudged slowly out of the bathroom, making sure to shut the taps off before the flood got any worse.

* * *

"Late, Miss Lupin," said Professor McGonagall sternly, as Rachael walked into the Transfiguration classroom ten minutes after class had already started. After taking an unwilling swim in the flooded bathroom, Rachael had dashed up to the Gryffindor common room. On the way, she was slipping and sliding across the stone floor and occasionally crashing into a suit of armor. She changed into a clean pair of robes and ran at full speed back down to Transfiguration.

"Sorry," she said apologetically, taking the vacant seat next to Lily. "Had a bit of a run in with Peeves."

"And what is our poltergeist up to now?"

"Flooding the girls' bathroom on the second floor."

Professor McGonagall clicked her tongue and sent Alice Gordon to find Mr. Filch and bring him to the flooded bathroom. James and Sirius sniggered at the thought of a flooded bathroom.

"Was Myrtle freaking out?" Sirius hissed to Rachael.

Rachael nodded, feeling a bit agitated that she had just gone swimming against her will. Myrtle got upset over the smallest things, so Sirius shouldn't have even bothered to ask. Professor McGonagall tapped her wand against the blackboard at the head of the classroom and the day's notes appeared as though an invisible hand was scrawling them on.

"Copy down these notes please," said Professor McGonagall, tapping her wand at the board yet again. "Tomorrow we will be learning how to transfigure an animal into a water goblet."

The class muttered approvingly and began writing down the day's notes.

"So you went swimming in Peeves's mess?" Remus asked as he wrote down the incantation.

Rachael looked up at her brother and saw him struggling not to laugh. "Yes, I did," she said coolly. "Why don't you go down there and take a dip yourself?"

"I just might," he mocked, setting his quill down and cracking his knuckles.

"Want some help then?" said Lily, looking up from her work.

Remus just gave a smile that said 'no thank you' and returned to his work. As Rachael copied down her notes she listened as James and Sirius discussed in hushed voices about how they were going to humiliate Snape in the coming year. They were thinking of using Wingardium Leviosa on him a couple of times; maybe letting his knickers see daylight. They snickered at the very thought, though earning nothing except an order to be quiet from their professor.

"Least she didn't hear what we were saying," whispered James in a relieved voice. The notes took them all class to copy so once the last student put his quill down the bell rang and the Gryffindors packed up their books to go to Charms class. They walked down the crowded corridor, suddenly smelling something… a Dung Bomb.

"Eww," said Lily in a chocked voice as she covered her nose with her hand. As they ran down the corridor and sped down the steps they discovered the Dung Bombs were the result of yet another gag of Peeves.

"Peeves is on a roll today," Remus muttered as they took their seats in the back of Professor Flitwick's Charms classroom. "Flooding the bathroom… setting off Dung Bombs…" Just then there was a loud explosion heard in the corridor just outside the classroom, followed by the high pitched cackling of the poltergeist. The class rushed to the door to discover pink and blue smoke filling the hall and saw sparks of light coming out of the smoke. "Setting off fireworks in the hallway…"

They spent a rather uneventful period in Charms class, listening lazily as Professor Flitwick explained to them, in his high pitched voice, the correct wand movements for the teeth growing charm, Densaugeo. Though the class was disrupted every once and a while as a firework whizzed its way into the classroom, only to be followed by a raging Mr. Filch who was trying to find them all.

After the tenth time Mr. Filch came into the classroom, distracting the entire class, Professor Flitwick gave up altogether on trying to teach his class and let them have the rest of the period to talk amongst themselves.

"So… do anything else over the summer Sirius?" Rachael asked, turning her chair towards Sirius. "Besides watching your house elf's head getting chopped off."

"Well you know we went to your house," he said, finishing the last of the notes Professor Flitwick had given them. "You're right, your mother is a (he said something that made James clap his hand over Sirius's mouth). Nasty piece of work."

"No need to tell me that," said Rachael, glaring at the mention of her mother.

"Are you referring to when you told my mum off?" asked Remus, looking up from his notes. Sirius nodded, unable to keep a small smile off his face at the thought.

Rachael looked at Sirius questioningly. "And what did you tell her off about?" she asked, quite keen on hearing the answer.

Sirius shook his head, clearly not wanting to talk about it. Remus shoved Sirius in the shoulder as a way of telling him to tell her what he argued with their mother about. Remus rolled his eyes.

"If you don't say I will," he threatened. Remus smiled, but Sirius didn't look deterred by that. Instead he hissed in his friend's ear, "I'll tell her later," and he jerked his head towards Lily, who luckily didn't notice as she was flipping through the pages of her Charms textbook. Remus understood at once.

* * *

"Why does Binstom hate us so much?" James whined as they took their seats at the Gryffindor table during lunch. They had just gotten out of Herbology class and were incredibly sore from potting some Mandrakes for Professor Sprout.

"Because he came from Slytherin," Sirius answered as he eased down into a seat beside James. Binstom had taken it upon himself to spend the entire double period of Potions giving the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws incredibly ridiculous notes to copy for a simple Shrinking Solution. They knew it couldn't be as hard as their professor made it. He just liked giving them hard work without any mercy. After the notes he made them start concocting the solution, all the while breathing down their necks.

"Be grateful your potion didn't almost eat you," Remus muttered as he poked the sausage on his plate. Remus, who was good at many things, wasn't much of a potion brewer. His potion went horribly wrong and started bubbling up crazily. Professor Binstom had to Vanish the entire cauldron before it caused any serious damage.

Sirius snorted at the thought. "I pity that Ravenclaw who was working at the table next to yours," he said in a voice of mock pity. "Didn't that stuff splatter all over her robes?"

"Yes," said Remus miserably as the very same Ravenclaw walked past him and flicked him in the back of the head. "What was that for?" he snapped at her. The Ravenclaw said nothing, just gave him a look and stalked off to her table.

"Maybe because that potion burnt a hole right through her robes," said James thoughtfully. "What class do we have next?"

"History of Magic," Sirius answered, taking a glance at his schedule.

James moaned. Everyone hated History of Magic, as Binns was the most boring professor in the entire school. They thought that the fact that Professor Binns was their only teacher who was a ghost that he might make class interesting. But no! It was just as dull and humdrum as every other class.

"I hate that class!" he whined. "They should put in the requirements 'MUST BRING PILLOW,' honestly, Binns is _that_ boring."

"Ah suck it up and take it like a man!" said Remus.

"I'd rather be a woman then!"

Remus and Sirius looked at each and back at James.

"Unneeded info."

* * *

Needless to say, History of Magic was as boring as boring can get. The boys spent the entire period trying to keep themselves awake by slapping each other on the face if one of them got too close to falling asleep. Rachael and Lily were also struggling to remain focused. Their minds kept drifting away, however, when they tried.

Once classes let out, Rachael and Lily headed up to the Gryffindor common room where they deposited their book bags in the dormitory and went back down into the common room where they found the boys sitting around the table in front of the fire. As they were heading over Lily suddenly muttered something about wanting to start her Potions essay and scurried back up to the dormitory. Rachael smiled; she knew Lily just didn't want to be around James. _Actually that's not a bad idea,_ and she ran after Lily back up to the dormitory.

"I don't get it," said James miserably as he watched Lily run back upstairs. "Why does she hate me so much?" Remus and Sirius shrugged. "Oh come on! You guys can honestly say that you don't know?" Again they shrugged. "Just tell me the truth!"

Remus and Sirius exchanged glances.

"The truth?" said Remus uneasily. James nodded impatiently. Remus looked as though he wished James had never asked the question. But he answered anyway. "Well she thinks your conceited, big headed, annoying, a brat…" Remus took one look at James's expression and knew immediately he had made a mistake. James face had turned unnaturally red and his face was contorted into a mean frown.

"Is that so?" he stammered. Remus didn't say anything. "Really? Did she really say that or did you just make it up yourself?"

"James, what?"

"Well I don't need a freak of a wolf telling me this."

"James!" Sirius was on his feet now, positively fuming. "You asked a question and Remus answered it! It's not his fault that's what Lily thinks you are. It's your own fault!"

But James didn't listen. Instead he got up and stormed out of the common room. Sirius looked down at Remus, who was watching with a blank expression as James left the room.

Sirius whipped around when he heard footsteps running down from the direction of the dormitories. Rachael had just appeared at the foot of the stairs and was looking around curiously.

"What was all the yelling about?" she asked, having spotted Sirius.

"James," Sirius said shortly.

"What's he going on about?"

"James asked us why Lily hates him, Remus answered, and James called him a freak of a wolf."

"Did he now?" said Rachael, a swift feeling of rage overcoming her. Sirius nodded. "Excuse me I need to have a word with James!" Rachael rushed past Sirius and out through the common room where she caught James just as he was descending the staircase. She grabbed his shoulder and wheeled him around.

"What the heck did you say that for?" she yelled at him, catching the attention of a few third years passing by them.

"Say what?" James asked, gesturing for the third years to leave.

"Why did you call Remus a 'freak of a wolf'?"

"Because he called me big headed and conceited and a brat!"

"He was only saying what Lily thinks you are. It's not his fault!"

"He could have not told me."

"You asked for God's sake!" James still wouldn't give in and say he was wrong. "Why did you have to call him that?"

"He is what he is," and with that James shook out of Rachael's grip on his shoulder and continued down the stairs leaving Rachael glaring angrily after him.


	29. A Punch for an insult

Chapter Twenty Nine  
A Punch for an Insult

Dinner was a very quiet affair that night. James had secluded himself at the end of the table, not talking to Remus, Sirius or Rachael. Although he did occasionally walk over to ask Peter something, as he held no grudge against him. Sirius was so angry with James he was gorging himself with food out of pure spite and kept shooting James nasty glances. Rachael was just as angry as Sirius but her anger seemed to prevent her from eating. But neither of them could have been more upset than Remus.

Remus was sitting quietly at his spot at the table. He was not touching his food, his head resting on his folded hands and staring straight at the wall, not even blinking. Every now and then he took a glance down the table, but he only found himself seething with anger and returned his attention towards the wall. Sirius, Rachael and Peter didn't dare try and talk to Remus about what happened; they all knew perfectly well.

But _what_ had gotten James that mad? He had asked for Lily's opinion about him and Remus answered him with the truth. But that just seemed to drive James up a wall. That still didn't give him an excuse to call Remus a freak of a wolf.

"What are we going to do about this?" Sirius muttered to Rachael out of the corner of his mouth. She shrugged; truthfully she hadn't the faintest idea about how to make James come around. He was as angry as she had ever seen him, and that included all the times they had run-ins with Snape. "Well they can't stay mad at each other forever."

"I know that," Rachael muttered.

"Well you know James isn't mad at Peter," said Sirius, looking pointedly at Peter, whose fork stopped in midair upon hearing Sirius.

"No, Sirius," said Peter firmly. "I don't want to get involved in this."

"Oh come on, Pete!" begged Sirius.

"You don't want to see them fighting do you?" said Rachael, looking at him imploringly.

But Peter wasn't going to give in to begging looks. "Why can't one of you talk to him?" he said stubbornly.

Sirius gave a frustrated sigh. "Because he's mad at us too!"

Peter wouldn't give in to begging but… Sirius and Rachael looked at each other, smiling at the idea, and turned back to Peter with the most pathetic puppy dogfaces he had ever seen. "Okay fine! I'll talk to him!"

Sirius and Rachael quickly dropped the faces and smiled. "Thank you!" they said together.

Reluctantly, Peter got up from his place and went over to join James. Sirius and Rachael turned their attention to Remus, who was still staring fixedly at the wall behind his friends.

"Remus?" said Rachael timidly. His eyes darted towards her. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he murmured sarcastically. "Just great!"

Rachael didn't like the way he put an emphasis on the word 'great' that was never a good sign. "Don't be mad about it, it's not your fault."

"Nope not mine… I just couldn't keep my big mouth shut."

"James should have kept _his_ mouth shut," said Sirius angrily. "He asked and you answered. It's not your fault he blew up at you."

Remus just shook his head and left the hall without another word. Rachael and Sirius watched him go and then turned their attention to see how Peter was making out with James. From the looks of it, it looked as though it would've been much more successful if they had talked with James instead.

Peter was giving him pleading looks, words of complete begging, trying to explain to him that Remus wasn't trying to hurt his feelings. He even pulled off a puppy face that made Sirius and Rachael's look pitiful. But James would not see the errors of his ways. Rachael shook her head; this wasn't going to be easy.

* * *

"Welcome Gryffindors to second year Defence Against the Dark Arts."

It was the second day of school and if the boys and Rachael had thought the first day was bad, it was only beginning. There was a situation in Potions where a few mixed ingredients caused a Ravenclaw's potion to melt through the cauldron and burn a hole right through the dungeon floor. Herbology had been a mess as no one seemed to be able to find their earmuffs when potting some more Mandrakes and the entire class and Professor Sprout were knocked out for the whole class.

But that was only classes. The worst of it was that Peter talking to James had no effect whatsoever. He was just as mad as he had been the day before. Remus was equally, if not madder, than James. The both of them seemed to have a highly different way of expressing their anger. James would walk about the castle muttering under his breath, occasionally swearing.

Remus on the other hand didn't say anything about the fight at all. In fact, he didn't say _anything_. All during class he would sit and do his work, speaking only when spoken too and even then not saying more than one or two words. Rachael, Sirius and Peter were trying their best to reconcile the two, but it seemed that neither of them was going to forgive and forget.

They were now sitting in Professor Lupin's Defence Against the Dark Arts class, listening as he did role call. When he concluded he started class by talking to them all about the coming year and what they should expect.

Basically it was the same thing as last year, learning about the magical creatures and such, but this year they would also be learning about certain hexes. They started learning about the hex known as Rictesempra ten minutes before the bell signaled. They hadn't gotten very far, no one even managed to perfect the wand movements. So they would continue with that the next class.

"What's after this?" Sirius asked as he packed his Defence Against the Dark Arts book away in his school bag.

Rachael checked her schedule. "Transfiguration," she muttered as she put her books away. She put her quill in her bag, slung it over her shoulder and started towards the door with Lily, Sirius and Remus when Professor Lupin spoke up, stopping them.

"Remus, could you come here for a moment please?" he asked, looking at his son concernedly.

Remus nodded and abandoned his friends to go talk with his dad. Rachael, Lily and Sirius hesitated at the door for a moment but continued down to Transfiguration, knowing that Remus would probably tell them what his dad wanted to talk to him about anyway.

"Sit," said Professor Lupin as he cleared his lesson plan off his desk. Remus reluctantly took the seat across from his father. He knew what his father was going to ask and he didn't want to answer.

"So," Professor Lupin said, placing his briefcase on the floor next to his desk. "I just wanted to ask you if everything's alright. You look upset." Remus shook his head, avoiding looking at his dad. "You sure there isn't anything you want to tell me?"

"James is mad at me," Remus muttered incoherently, somehow though his father understood.

"Why? What'd you do?"

"I didn't do _anything_! He asked me a question, he wanted the truth and I gave it to him."

Professor Lupin leaned back in his chair. "What'd James want to know?"

"Why Lily hates him so much, she says he's conceited and spoiled and a brat, that's what James wanted to know so I told him." Remus couldn't understand why James would get so upset. But, right about now, he didn't care about James, he agreed with Lily. "If he didn't want the truth he shouldn't have asked."

"Yes, well, sometimes people do stupid things. Look, don't let this bother you so much, James will come around, or you'll talk to him. I'm sure Sirius or Rachael will talk to him for you." Remus looked up at his father. "They did that already?"

Remus shook his head. "He's mad at them too for sticking up for me."

Professor Lupin nodded. "You know, I don't think that's all that's bothering you, is there anything else?"

"Well yeah… James called me a freak of a wolf."

Professor Lupin's eyelids contracted. For a moment he looked as though he might begin yelling. But he didn't. "Remus," he said in a strained voice. "James is your friend and he doesn't really mean it. You know you're not a freak, don't let it bother you." He looked down at his watch. "I think you'd better head to class."

"Right, bye Dad."

* * *

"James? Can I talk to you for a minute?"

It was now after dinnertime and yet again Sirius and Rachael had forced Peter into talking some sense into James. But James wouldn't listen to a word Peter had to say. Peter had given up and was letting Rachael and Sirius deal with it, and they weren't having any more progress than Peter was.

Rachael was now in the common room, scouting out James and spotted him sitting behind a group of giggling third year girls. He was reading through his copy of _Quidditch through the Ages_ and obviously restraining himself from telling the girls to stop laughing.

James looked up when he heard Rachael speak to him. "What?" he muttered.

"Look, you guys can't stay mad at each other forever," said Rachael.

"Maybe we can."

"James, don't be so stupid. Remus is miserable because of this and so are you and you know it."

"I am _not_ miserable. And if Remus is that's his problem. I want nothing to do with a freak of a wolf."

Rachael didn't say anything; all she did was hit James, hard, across the face and stomped off in the direction of the girls' dormitory. She pushed the door open and slammed it shut, marched over to her bed and flung herself down upon it. What was James's problem? Why didn't he realise he was wrong and that he should just apologise already? But no! Instead he had to carry on like none of this was his fault.

It wasn't Remus's fault. It wasn't his fault that Lily thought of James like that. Right about now, Rachael agreed wholeheartedly with her best friend. James was acting like a brat. Rachael was worried about Remus. He just wasn't being himself these days. This wasn't like him at all. Even if he was in a fight in the old days at their Muggle school, he never let it affect him like this. But this was different… James was one of the few friends Remus had because of what he was and to lose one of your few friends… it was enough to make anyone this upset.

That wasn't the only thing bothering Rachael. She had risked sending a letter to her mother about what was wrong with Remus and the reply she got wasn't what she expected. She had thought her mother might listen to her if it was about Remus. But even then it didn't seem to help. The letter read as thus:

_My so called daughter,  
__Is this a sorry and pathetic excuse for me to pay attention to you? To make me forgive you for what your stupid mind has done to my son? Is it? If it is a sorry plot to make me somehow forgive you then you are seriously wasting your time. I will not say this nicely: STOP TRYING TO CONTACT ME YOU STUPID GIRL!_

When Rachael read the letter she couldn't believe what she was seeing. So she was a liar now, was she? She would never lie about Remus being upset! Why did her mother hate her so much? Why didn't she believe her? She tore the letter into fifty pieces and threw them viciously into the wastepaper basket below her. Out of anger, she kicked it and watched it fall over, spilling the trash onto the floor, but she didn't stop to clean it up.

She crossed over to the dormitory window and flung it open. Leaning on the windowsill she stared up at the half moon in the sky… someday…someday she was going to do it. She didn't know when, but someday she was going to.

* * *

Herbology was canceled the following day due to massive amounts of rain, thunder, lightening, mud and the fact that the winds were so quick that it was near impossible to open the doors to the grounds, let alone walk across them. So the Gryffindors spent their free period in their common room, as it was the only warm place in the entire castle. The sky was so dark the torches were lit early and the corridors were ice cold, making it terribly unpleasant to walk about them.

Rachael sat with Lily on one of the couches listening to Sirius ramble on about how boring History of Magic was and if he was teaching it, it would be much more interesting. He hadn't noticed that Remus, whom he was using this story to entertain, wasn't paying the least bit attention to him and had actually gotten up several times to go up to the dormitory. When he came back down it was only to discover Sirius was still going on as though Remus had never left.

Sirius was now saying how he would act out the goblin battles and using stunning visual effects when Remus said very loudly, "Sirius shut up already!"

Sirius looked highly offended, but he couldn't help but smile slightly.

"Fine, be that way! My talents are never appreciated!" And he picked up his books and stalked out of the common room and stomped on the bottom step on the staircase for about a minute. Then he came ambling back down and dropped at the foot of the table. "But too bad for those who don't like it!" He shoved his friend playfully in the shoulder and went on a rant again, this time about the giant squid in the lake. Remus couldn't help but smile at the absurdity of what his friend was saying. Sirius was going on about how one day all the Gryffindors should hitch a ride on the back of the squid and dive-bomb the Slytherins with it.

Rachael rolled her eyes at Lily, who was listening to the conversation with a cross between a smile and frown on her face. Rachael could tell what her friend was fretting over: The thought of humiliating the Slytherins was something every Gryffindor loved no matter what. And yet she just couldn't seem to keep out of her mind the fact that it wasn't a smart thing to do.

Rachael on the other hand thought it was hilarious. She could just picture it: There were all the slimy Slytherins, Snape at the head of the gang of course. And all of the Gryffindors emerged out of the lake with a giant tidal wave of water. They were holding a lasso on the neck of the squid and dived headlong into the Slytherins and they got knocked over like bowling pins.

"You know that might actually make me feel sorry for the Slytherins," said Remus in a small voice full of mock concern.

"It would?" gasped Sirius. "Remus Lupin, what has gotten into you?" Right then the loud screeching bell sounded. "Well we'll worm it out of you after class, off to Transfiguration!" And with that Sirius suddenly halted at attention and marched soldier like out of the common room portrait hole.

Remus looked over at his sister. "What's gotten into _him_ today?"

* * *

Rachael lay on her four-poster bed in the dormitory, the curtains pull around. Staring up at the ceiling, she couldn't help but think about that letter her mother had sent her. She felt a surge of pure hatred every time she thought about it and yet she couldn't help but do just that. What had made her mother so blind that day four years ago? She just couldn't understand it. She and her mother used to get along so well… despite the fact that Remus had always been her mother's favourite. But that never made her act so horrible to her.

She remembered when she was four years old and she had fallen off of the tree she and her brother had been climbing on. She broke her small arm and was crying so hard. Her mother had rushed to come and help her, telling her it would be all right and not to cry. Her thoughts were disrupted, however, by Sirius calling her name from the common room.

"Rachael!" he called. "Get down here!"

Wondering what on earth Sirius could want, Rachael hopped off her bed and dashed down the steps to find a group of Gryffindors crowded at the foot of the stairs, watching two people shouting at each other. Sirius was at the foot of the stairs and snatched her arm and dragged her through the crowd to the very centre. At the centre of the circle, standing opposite of each other, were James and Remus.

James was standing closest to the stairs. His face was ruby red, his hands balled into fists, he was bent over slightly and yelling at the top of his voice. Remus was closest to the portrait hole, half listening to James, half shouting. His face wasn't red, it was paler than it had ever been… and there wasn't even a full moon approaching. Rachael couldn't make heads or tails of what they were saying, but by the sound of it, it seemed James was winning this arguement.

"Hey!" Sirius shouted at the both of them. "Shut up the both of you!" But they weren't about to listen to Sirius, on it went.

"I don't care what you've got to say!" James hollered past Sirius and at Remus.

"James, just listen to me!" Remus yelled back desperately.

"I'm not listening to _you_! I hate you!" James broke through the crowd and stormed up the dormitory. Sirius followed after him and muttered to Rachael that he was going to try and talk to James. But Rachael couldn't see the point. James had made it quite clear he wanted nothing to do with Remus. She nodded anyway and broke up the crowd that had assembled around her brother and James and told them to mind their own business.

Remus retreated to the couch and dropped himself into it. Arms folded across his chest, Remus looked absolutely miserable. Rachael waited until the last of the curious Gryffindors had resumed their business before going over to him. Once the last straggler in the crowd had returned to her game of Gobstones, Rachael sat down next to her brother.

"What just happened?" she asked quietly. Remus shook his head, clearly not wanting to discuss it. Rachael bit her lip. "What'd James say?" Again her brother shook his head. "Come on, Remus."

"Lily was around and James was talking really loudly saying that I was an idiot and that Lily could never think any of those things about him and Lily heard and defended me and James just blew up!" Remus said in one rushed breath, so quick that his sister barely understood him.

"Then what?"

"Then Lily started yelling at him but James told her not to get involved so he just started yelling at me while I was trying to talk and he just said he hates me and that's all I need to know!"

* * *

"James, what is your problem!" Sirius boomed as he burst through the dormitory only to find James sitting on his bed, polishing his newly acquired broomstick, a birthday present from his folks. James looked up at Sirius, said nothing, and returned to polishing his broom. "James!"

"I have no problem," James muttered.

Sirius scoffed at him.

"Oh come on, James!" he yelled. "Why're you being such a… such an- (he said a word which I will not repeat)."

James looked up at his former friend incredulously. "So I'm that, am I?" he huffed. He jumped off his bed, swung his broom over his shoulder (almost hitting Sirius with it in the process) "Who cares? I don't care what he's got to say or what you've got to say!" With that he was out the door leaving Sirius in a cloud of anger.

~*~

After dinner had concluded, Rachael and Lily pulled on their cloaks and headed out towards the Quidditch Pitch. It was the day of tryouts for the Gryffindor team. They were looking for a new Beater, Chaser and Seeker. Sirius was already out on the pitch with one of the school brooms. He was surveying the cloudless sky with squinted eyes. Sirius couldn't wait for when it was his turn to tryout, he wanted to be a Beater for the team. Rachael knew he could do it. Sirius was exceptionally skilled with knocking things at a target… particularly dungbombs at Snape.

If Sirius hadn't been trying out they wouldn't have even bothered coming. Actually Lily didn't want to go at all but Rachael had persuaded her to come. James was at the opposite end of the pitch; he too was surveying the sky. First to try out was James for Chaser. Sirius was going after Sammy Grinkov, a stout fourth year.

They watched mildly as James mounted his broom and took off into the air with the two other Chasers and Keeper. The two Chasers and James tossed the Quaffle back and forth until they were right in front of the Keeper, Kirk Gamballi. Rachael had to admit that James could handle a Quaffle quite well and was a terrific flyer. He moved stealthily through the air towards Kirk, faking him to the right, shooting to the left, and scoring, smiling broadly as he listened to the cheers of the Gryffindor team.

"When's Sirius up?" came Remus's voice from somewhere below them.

Rachael and Lily snapped their heads to see Remus coming up the steps to the bleachers. They were extremely surprised to see him there. After the fight with James earlier that day he resigned himself to his dormitory.

"Uh, there's like five more people before him," Rachael answered, squinting to see the lineup across the field, but to no avail. She could hardly see the large bold print.

"You seriously need glasses," Lily laughed as she looked at the lineup and read off the names for Remus.

Rachael glared at her friend. "Excuse me, Miss twenty-twenty vision," she mocked.

Remus took the vacated seat on the other side of Lily and watched with an unreadable expression as James scored another goal before being called off the field.

They sat and watched lazily as the next person fumbled his way through Chaser tryouts, dropping the Quaffle more times than they could count. As far as Lily was concerned, she didn't have enough fingers and toes to count. The next person was slightly better, she only dropped the Quaffle for the amount of fingers they had.

"Finally, Sirius is up!" Rachael said in relief, waving down to Sirius who had just waved at the three of them. They leaned forward one the wall and watched as Sirius mounted his broom. "Good thing the rain cleared up," Rachael commented, looking up at the dull sky. Sirius was hovering in the air, slapping his Beater's bat into his hand while he waited for the Bludgers to be released.

Finally the Bludgers were released and he chased after them swiftly as they made their way to the two Chasers. Sirius was quite good. He only missed the Bludger once and that was only because he had sneezed at that very moment. He felt bad for the Chaser who got knocked in the face with it and had to be taken to the Hospital Wing.

* * *

"Sirius, you were great, how could you say you were terrible?" Remus asked disbelievingly as he, Sirius, Rachael and Lily walked back up to the castle once the new positions had been filled. Unfortunately, that one missed Bludger was enough to cost Sirius being a Beater. Jeff Baldwin got the position instead. James, however, had become a Chaser. But Sirius had been very good even though he didn't get the spot.

"'Cause I didn't get on the team?" Sirius answered in a despondent voice.

Remus shook his head. "But you were still good," he countered.

They walked slowly up to the seventh floor. They didn't want to get to the common room because there was certainly going to be a celebration going on for the new Gryffindor Quidditch Team members - James, Willard Jacobson who earned the spot of Seeker and Jeff Baldwin who was the Beater. For Sirius's sake, they took a detour through the fourth floor, which brought them up to a different end of the seventh floor far away from the common room, and they allowed themselves to be distracted by the portrait of Sir Cadogan.

But eventually they had to go back, and when they did a rush of tremendous noise greeted them. There was a crowd of students around the Gryffindor team, all of them decked out in scarlet and gold robes.

"Jeez, they make it seem like it's such a big deal," Lily mumbled as she fought her way through the crowd of students to get to her dormitory. Rachael knew that if James hadn't been down there she'd be celebrating.

"I'm gonna head up to the dormitory too," Sirius muttered, making a beeline towards the stairs. Rachael and Remus bid him goodnight and watched as James came clambering over to them.

"Look who got made Chaser?" he said smugly.

"You?" Rachael answered smartly.

"Yeah, guess they like _normal_ people on the team."

What happened after that was something Rachael thought she'd never see in her life. Remus's fist had come out of nowhere and connected with the side of James's face with such a force that he fell sideways.

"YOU KNOW WHAT?" Remus yelled, attracting the attention of everyone who was in the common room and the dormitories. "I'M SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR CRAP! YOU THINK YOU'RE THE COOLEST THING IN THE WORLD! BUT GUESS WHAT? LILY WAS RIGHT! YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A CONCIETED LITTLE BRAT!" With that, Remus was gone.

James looked up at Rachael, who was watching her brother with complete and utter disbelief. _Was that just my brother_?

She looked down at James.

"You know you deserved that."


	30. Friends Till The End

Chapter Thirty  
Friends Till The End

Sirius stood on the foot of the stairs, dumbfounded at what he had just witnessed. He jumped out of the way of a fuming Remus, who had just shoved past him to get to his dormitory. Sirius looked over at Remus's sister who just shrugged and mouthed for Sirius to go after him and talk to him. She wanted to deal with James. Now was as good a time as any to end this feud before it got any worse.

Sirius was only too quick to oblige the order. He turned on his heel and dashed up the stairs. He opened the door to the second year boys' dormitory to find Remus in a rage. He was sitting on his bed, muttering wildly under his breath, kicking the nightstand and ignoring the stabbing pains he received in result. Remus muttered something that seemed to be directed to Sirius, but he didn't understand it.

"What, Remus?" he asked, a bit timidly, not wanting his friend to blow up at him.

"Who does James think he is?" Remus yelled, balling his hands into tight fists. "How could he just say that to me?"

"What _did_ he say anyway?" Sirius hadn't heard what had set Remus off so badly, but he knew that whatever it was had something to do with Remus being a werewolf.

"He came over to me and said they only wanted normal people on the team, looking right at me! It's not my fault I'm a stupid werewolf! Why does he have to rub it in so bad?"

Sirius shook his head; he didn't know how to handle it.

* * *

Rachael watched lazily as James came back up from the Great Hall with three ice cubes wrapped up in a napkin and held it gently against the side of his mouth. He sat down opposite Rachael, who immediately sat up and glared at him.

"Don't even say it," he muttered, casting his eyes down to the floor. "You're going to say I deserved it."

"Yeah pretty much," she agreed.

"Well, I don't need a lecture."

"Too bad because you need one." James looked up expectantly and settled himself in his seat; this was guaranteed to be long. "What's wrong with you, James? How could you say those things to Remus?"

"Because!"

"Because isn't an answer. You can't just call him those things. How would you like it if he could call you those things and he did? You'd be just as angry as he is. James, Lily doesn't like you so just face it. Don't take it out on one of your best friends. It isn't worth it."

* * *

"Remus, can I talk to you."

"No."

"Come on!"

"No!"

James had made his way up to the boys' dormitory, attempting to talk to Remus, who was lying on his bed, doing some Charms homework. However he wasn't doing it very well. He was answering all of his questions with an attitude, which he knew Professor Flitwick wouldn't be happy, but he didn't care. He just needed something to occupy his thoughts, and what better way than homework?

"Remus!" James whined.

_Now he wants to talk to me_, Remus thought bitterly as he copied down the next question for his homework. Remus sat up and pulled the hangings around his bed, blocking James out of sight. He watched as the outline of James crossed over to his bed, pulled off his cloak and made his way back over.

James grabbed a handful of the hangings and yanked them back around. "I want to talk to you!" he said firmly.

But Remus didn't care how firm his voice was. Why should he talk to him? "Oh now you do?" he snapped suddenly. "Why do you want to talk to a freak like me for?"

_Oh nice guilt_, James thought, mildly impressed. He shook his head. "Because I want to talk to you!"

"Fine, let's talk. How come you're acting like such a big jerk? How come your head hasn't exploded from being so big yet?"

"_How come_ you're acting like such a baby?"

Remus's eyes flashed dangerously. "_How come I'm acting like a baby_?" he asked incredulously. "You're the one who's acting like a baby! You can't handle the truth! You asked for the truth and I gave it to you! Now you're just proving what Lily said."

"Yeah I asked for the truth and I'm sorry that I blew up at you. Are you ever going to forgive me?"

"No," said Remus simply, shutting his Charms book and putting it under his arm.

"Remus!"

"No! You're supposed to be my friend and you called me a freak of a wolf. What kind of friend does that?" And before James could say another word, Remus had ran out of the dormitory, leaving him open mouthed.

* * *

"Remus, what're you doing here?"

It was a little after curfew for the second years and Remus had just ambled into his father's classroom. His father was straightening some of the desks out when he saw his son walk in.

"Dad, can I please just stay in here for a while?" Remus begged.

"It's already past your curfew; I don't think it's a good idea for you to be-"

"Please, Dad! I can't stand being in the same room with James while he's awake."

Professor Lupin raised his eyebrows slightly and nodded in a defeated manner. How was he supposed to deny his son when it came to a feud with his best friend? Remus smiled gratefully and took a seat in the nearest desk and restarted his Charms homework while his dad went over the next day's lesson.

Remus scratched his chin with the tip of his quill as he thought about the question: _What is the proper wand movement for the Silencing Charm?_ Remus didn't know that… They weren't due to learn that until fifth year. What was Flitwick playing at? Was he just trying to torment them endlessly with this ridiculously hard work? But it wasn't so hard… he could have just asked a fifth year for the answer. Now it was too late. All the fifth years were in the common room and Remus couldn't go now that he had begged his father to let him stay in the classroom.

He stared blankly at his sheet of parchment, unaware that he hadn't blinked for at least two minutes and his eyes were beginning to water. He quickly blinked and tried as hard as he could to think of an answer. But it was no good. He just scribbled in the first movement that came to mind, which just happened to be the movements for the Levitation Spell.

"What'd James do to get you mad now?" his dad asked, looking up from his lesson plan.

"He told me they only want normal people on the Quidditch team," Remus answered with difficulty.

Professor Lupin shook his head. He had as much trouble as his son did in understanding how James could act like that. All he could do was try and keep his son's spirits up, which wasn't working, as Remus was so miserable. "Don't let him bother you," he said encouragingly. Remus shrugged. He couldn't help but let it get to him. James was his friend and how could he just say those things? Professor Lupin checked his watch. "James should be asleep by now, why don't you head back up to the dormitory, here's a pass."

Remus snatched the pass from his father and left without even saying a goodnight.

* * *

It was early Saturday morning. The castle was still quiet and lifeless as the occupants were taking advantage of no classes, both staff and students. Gryffindor Tower was still quiet, as most of the students wanted to sleep in rather than head down to breakfast. However the stillness was broken quiet suddenly by a loud screech owl hovering in front of one of the open windows.

All of the Gryffindors rushed down to see a little brown owl fluttering outside the window, clutching a letter, screeching madly. One of the prefects broke through the crowd of disgruntled first years. He snatched the owl and pulled the letter off of its foot and sent the owl back to wherever it had come from.

"Whose letter is this?" he wondered aloud. "Rachael Lupin," he read. "Someone go get her." Alice Gordon heeded the prefect's request and raced up to the dormitory to find her friend, who'd not been awoken by the loud screeches. "This came for you," said the prefect, once an extremely groggy Rachael came down from the dormitory.

"Thanks," she said tiredly, taking the letter and bringing it up to the dormitory. She sat down at the desk and carefully opened the letter. She didn't even need to look at the return address. She knew who it was from, and she knew it wouldn't be a nice response. Rachael wondered why she'd even bothered writing to her mother about Remus's unexpected outburst the other day. She thought maybe her mother would be mildly interested. However the minute she'd sent the owl off she regretted it. She wasn't looking forward to the response.

She slowly unfolded the letter and, much to her shock, found no capital letters in the response. But it still wasn't the response she had hoped for. It was short, sweet and very much to the point.

_How dare you make up such lies! Stop sending me lies!_

Rachael didn't know why but those two sentences sent her into a fury. She ripped the letter to shreds and tossed them in the waste bin. Her mother was such a… such a… oh she couldn't even say the word! All she knew was that she was going to get her mother back for all the misery she put her through, all in one simple way.

* * *

"You work things out with James?"

"James? James who?"

"The James that shares a dormitory with us maybe."

"Oh that… I thought that was just a lump taking up space."

Remus and Sirius were sitting at the Gryffindor table, waiting for Peter to arrive so they could head out onto the grounds, as they'd promised to watch Peter to attempt a flight on a broom. But Peter was sleeping in and they didn't want to disturb him. "Besides," said Remus, picking up a spoonful of oatmeal and letting it drip back into the bowl, "what's the point? He doesn't want to hang out with me, remember what I am?"

Sirius groaned. "Come on," he said desperately. "You know you want to apologise. You're just being stubborn!"

"So?"

Sirius couldn't help but smile. He resumed his breakfast, completely dropping the subjects of the Remus and James Feud. As they were heading out to find Peter they saw Rachael sitting under the steps in the Entrance Hall, scribbling on a piece of parchment, looking very irritated to say the least. They walked over.

"What's that?" asked Sirius, gesturing to the piece of parchment, which she quickly shoved into her robe pocket.

"Nothing," she said, in a very unconvincing voice. Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Seriously, it's just a bit of homework."

"And why are you doing homework under the stairs?" Remus asked, folding his arms across his chest, looking down at his sister.

"Look, drop it!"

The two boys nodded and resumed their search for Peter without another word to her. Once they were gone she looked at the sheet again. It was a calendar of all the full moons. She'd spent all morning charting them, trying to see which one fell closest to her mother's birthday, December 27th. The closest one happened the fall on Christmas and that was when she was going to put her plan into action. She had it all planned out ever since her mother sent her that first letter back at the orphanage.

She was going to earn her mother's love back. And if the only way to do it was to condemn herself to the life her brother had been cursed with… well then… she was willing to do it.

* * *

"Peter sleeps like a rock!" Remus exclaimed as he and Sirius attempted to wake their slumbering friend, but it was no use. They'd tried rolling him off his bed, only resulting in searing pains in their lower backs. They tried screaming really loudly in his ear, only earning themselves sore throats. And they'd just resorted to dumping a glass of ice-cold water over his head. Nothing worked. He was worse than Sirius sleeping.

Sirius walked back and forth in front of Peter's bed, rubbing his sore back as he did so. "You know he could always go flying when he regains consciousness," he said reasonably, but with a hint of joking in his voice.

Remus nodded, seeing as how if Peter wouldn't wake up, even after having water dumped on him, then he must be really tired. They grabbed their cloaks and went off to the pitch without him. They walked over to the broom shed so Sirius could use one of the school brooms so he could practise for tryouts for the following year.

"Sure you don't want to try?" he asked Remus as he shifted through the Cleansweeps. Remus shook his head; he wasn't much of a flier. "Okay, your lose." Sirius grabbed the one in best condition and led the way to the pitch. Once they arrived at the pitch Remus almost immediately suggested going back up to the castle. When Sirius asked why, Remus merely pointed to the sky and Sirius saw why.

Up in the air, soaring on his Comet Ninety was James, practising some of his Chaser moves. Sirius shook his head; just because Remus didn't want to be where James was wasn't going to stop him from practising. Remus shrugged hopelessly and resigned himself to the bleachers.

* * *

"Remus!" said a voice from behind. Remus was walking up to the Owlery, eager to visit his owl, when a voice stopped him. He looked over to see James running towards him, trying to catch up. Remus didn't know why, but he didn't speed up like he usually would, instead he slowed down his pace. Utterly surprised, James fell in step with Remus. "I need to talk to you," said James.

Remus half shrugged, meaning 'whatever'.

James smiled. "Okay, I'm really sorry for saying all that stuff and acting like such a jerk." He looked at Remus for signs of acknowledgment, but Remus was staring straight ahead still walking to the Owlery. "And…uh… I know you were just saying what Lily said and you're not a freak."

Remus still wasn't looking at James. They'd reached the Owlery and went up so Remus could visit his owl. He spotted him on one of the rafters and motioned for him to come down. Remus took a side-glance at James, who was biting his lower lip, apparently trying to think of something to say. Remus stroked his owl as he looked through the window down onto the grounds.

"I was a real jerk and I know it and I'm just really sorry. I dunno how I could've acted like that."

"I could tell you that," Remus muttered bitterly, letting his owl go back up to the rafters.

"Come on!"

"Look, you don't know how angry I was. I never had friends to make me that angry. But I will forgive you."

* * *

So all was right with James and Remus and because of their forgiving James was able to make amends with Sirius and Rachael, who were more than happy to see they had stopped fighting. Later that day the four boys were sitting at the table in the Gryffindor common room, talking in hushed voices so as to not attract the attention of the other Gryffindors. They had been discussing Remus's situation with the full moons and how it was hard for him to handle them while being by himself.

Sirius was talking about overhearing Professor McGonagall giving a lesson about Animagi to a group of Hufflepuff third years. She had explained it as being very complicated and that there were many risks involved.

"But how're we going to know what animal we're going to become?" Peter asked Sirius.

Sirius scratched his head, trying to remember what he had heard his professor saying. "I think it was something like whatever our personality was like, our animal would portray it or something," he said uneasily. He wasn't entirely sure but he was sure that was more than likely the answer. "The only bad thing is it takes a really long time to learn. We might not master it until fifth year." He glanced over at Remus, who grinned slightly.

"They're plenty more full moons to come." Remus couldn't help but smile at the idea his three best friends had made because of him. Even though it was illegal, he wanted the company of his friends on the nights when he was forced to transform into a werewolf. He could only imagine what his friends would be able to turn into. Sirius was loyal and always there when you needed him. He was a little bit of a sneak at times; particularly when there was a plot against the Slytherins was involved. A dog maybe…

James was difficult, not as easy to point out as Sirius. He was also pretty loyal, a true friend, although he did tend to be a little pompous and overbearing at times. Remus just couldn't think of an animal that best suited James's personality, nor could he think of one for Peter.

He'd just have to wait and see.

* * *

The next few weeks were very uneventful. As a matter of fact a mere three weeks seemed to be three lifetimes at the speed it was going. Rachael sometimes felt as though time had stood still for a month and was surprised to find that it had only been one day. James, Sirius and Peter had begun their research on Animagi, and so far their searches were fruitless. It was impossible for them to find any information in the library, which had been purposely been stripped of any books teaching the art of human transformation. All of the teachers had also refused to give the boys permission to look in the Restricted Section, which was where all the books were held.

Meanwhile, Remus was doing all he could to help them, trying to persuade Professor McGonagall to give them permission that is. Remus was always very persuasive and could usually get his way if he really tried. But, try as he might, none of the staff, not even his father, would budge and give them a book. So they were left to teach themselves. He thought at least his dad might give him permission. But he was just a strict as Professor McGonagall when it came to practising Animagi, though Remus failed to mention that they were going to attempt it when he mentioned it.

The first full moon of the school year was approaching, of course setting Remus a bit on edge. But other than being a little quiet, he was fine. However it wasn't Remus that everyone was worried about, it was his sister this time. She was acting very oddly, always seeming to be looking at the moon intently whenever they were up in the common room, something they'd never seen her do before. But whenever any one dared to approach her about it, she would simply brush away the subject and go about her business.

They didn't dare approach her after she'd finally blown up at them about it, yelling at the top of her voice that what was wrong with her was none of their business. However she had inadvertently told them that there was something wrong, just not what it was. But still, now that they knew, they wouldn't ask her about it. They'd figure it out on their own.

The day of the full moon James, Sirius and Peter bid Remus farewell as he made his way to the Hospital Wing, just a mere hour before the full moon would rise. Unlike the year before, Remus felt that he didn't need to spend the entire day of the full moon in the Hospital Wing. It was just giving himself more trouble by constantly being bored. So at six in the evening he left the common room and went down to the infirmary. While Remus was spending his night in the Shrieking Shack, his friends would be spending their night in the Restricted Section. They'd figured it all that morning as they were heading to Transfiguration.

"We use my Invisibility Cloak," said James in a hushed voice as they trudged through the mass of students making their way to their first period classes.

"You have an Invisibility Cloak?" asked Remus, sounding fascinated.

James nodded proudly and explained it was a family heirloom that his father had just passed down to him. He said he kept it stashed in his trunk at the very bottom, just in case any curious folk wanted to snoop around.

"So tonight," James said in an official tone. "We go to the Restricted Section and research away!"

"You guys are sure about this?" Remus questioned, sounding a bit nervous. He didn't want his friends stepping out of bounds on account of him.

"Dead sure."

* * *

"No you stupid pawn! Move that way!" Rachael shouted at her chess piece as she prodded it to the correct square on the chessboard. She and Lily were having a grueling match of wizards' chess and Lily was winning at the moment. Rachael had particularly rebellious chess pieces that were purposely moving to different spaces. Lily, on the other hand, had most obedient pieces that were obeying her every command. Lily was enjoying this very much, as she'd never beaten her friend at chess before.

"Stop laughing," Rachael muttered as she threw a smashed piece of her bishop at her giggling friend. Lily dodged the flying pieces, but wouldn't quit laughing. "It's not that funny!" snarled Rachael indignantly.

"Yes it is!" Lily chocked.

Rachael rolled her eyes at the absurdity of her friend, who was still chuckling as she tried to give her pieces a command. "Oh suck it up already!" she shouted, grabbing another handful of smashed pieces and chucking them at her friend, who yet again dodged them and burst into another fit of hysterical laughter. Rachael stood up and stood over her chuckling friend. "Did someone give you a Laughing Potion?"

Just at that very moment there was a shriek of laughter, this time not coming from Lily. Rachael looked up to see James, Sirius, and Peter sitting on the steps, laughing their heads off at Lily, who was completely unaware of what was happening.

"We couldn't help it!" Sirius blurted out, looking at the evil glare of his friend. "It was too good of an opportunity!"

Rachael nodded. "Sure you couldn't," she said sarcastically, kneeling down next to Lily and pulling her up off the floor where she was pounding her fists. "Now what to do with you…"

* * *

As a debt for giving Lily a Laughing Potion, the boys were now forced to break into the storage room in the dungeons to get the potion to reverse it, along with their midnight trek to the Restricted Section. The boys stole out of Gryffindor Tower, narrowly avoiding waking up the slumbering Fat Lady, and made their way through the dark to the library.

The boys walked quickly and cautiously, hoping to not run into Mrs. Norris, because then they were as good as caught as Filch would be running towards them, Invisibility Cloak or not. The boys had never wandered around castle after dark and they suddenly realised that it was both terrifying and yet the most exciting thing they'd ever done. The castle creaked and made odd noises, scaring the boys at first. But then they realised that it couldn't be possibly anything that would harm them. It would just be a ghost and what could a ghost do?

Then again it might be Peeves causing his usual havoc… but it was the dead of night and there was no one to unleash the terror on. In the end, they knew that it must be things all extremely old castles did, so they paid the noises no mind. They crept down the second floor corridor, looking around for the library, which was near impossible with the torches missing their bright flames. However they did manage to find it, only after walking into it.

James rubbed his throbbing nose and gently leaned forward on the door, pushing it open, while carefully avoiding making it creak. They tip toed across the threshold, cold on their feet, absent of shoes so their footsteps wouldn't echo in the corridors. Sirius pulled out his wand and muttered, "_Lumos_." The tip of his wand ignited, letting a feeble amount of light shine a path for them. They crept slowly around the library, looking around for the Restricted Section.

With the help of Sirius's wand, they managed to find a mangled and dusty sign hanging above a set of bar doors. They had found the Restricted Section. They had never been near the Restricted Section, let alone this far into the library, before and they found it quite odd that it wasn't guarded or locked. All there was was a pull out latch that separated this section from the others. They thought this was too easy.

They entered the Restricted Section, expecting sirens to wail and teachers to come bursting in. But there was absolutely nothing. Removing the cloak cautiously, the boys made their way to the A Section.

"So we just need to find a book," James hissed as he bundled up his cloak under his arm. Sirius nodded, eyes wide open and ears perked for sounds of Mrs. Norris or Filch. James stepped over to a shelf and began sifting through all of the books. "Eh… Alchemy of the 20th Century…Alice the Warlock wow that's weird…Animagus for Beginners. Found it!"

He pulled out a thick book that was chained to the shelf and dropped it on the desk with a particularly heavy thud. The three flinched and looked wildly around, fearing that the thud may have attracted some unwanted attention. To their intense relief, however, the castle was still and no one had noticed. Sirius and Peter crowded around James, who heaved the book right side up and opened the cover.

"You know, this is too easy…" said Peter apprehensively, looking over his shoulder.

"Oh come on," groaned James.

"Pete's right," Sirius agreed. "Don't you think they'd've made it a bit harder to sneak in here? Being 'restricted' and all…"

James glared at his friends for being so sceptical. If this place were guarded at all, then wouldn't the guard have shown himself the minute they stepped foot in the library? But nothing had indicated that they shouldn't be there (with the exception of the rules to which they had purposely neglected) so they needn't be worried.

"Guys, if there was any guard then we would've been caught already," James reasoned. But nothing James said would reassure them that they were going to get caught and receive detention for a month for being out of bounds. James shuffled through the first few pages of the book before he suddenly felt a burning sensation on the palms of his hands, which were laid across the book.

"Uh, James…" Sirius jerked his head down towards the book James was looking at and saw that it was glowing red and smoking. James jumped backwards into Peter, knocking him into a bookshelf, which began swaying violently.

"Peter, move!" James shoved Peter out of the way, Sirius following at a quick pace. They raced out of the library while the books began falling out of the shelf.

"The cloak, James!" Sirius yelled.

"Where'd I put it?" James hissed, noticing he wasn't holding it. Peter looked over his shoulder and saw the cloak lying helplessly under a pile of books. Panicking, James doubled backwards and began throwing the books that were on top of his cloak in various directions.

"'Ey, who's there?" came a voice not far off.

"No it's Filch!" Sirius panicked. He and Peter ran into the main section of the library and saw a faint light growing larger and larger as Filch approached the library. "James! Hurry!"

James grabbed three more books and dropped them next to him and picked up his cloak, dashing towards his friends and flinging it over them. They ran to the library exit but stopped short upon noticing that Filch was standing there, hunched over and holding a bright lantern.

Holding their rapid breath, the boys slid over to the left and waited for Filch to enter far enough so they could slip out unnoticed. But Filch was taking his time observing the room, listening with perked ears for the slightest sound of movement to indicate the boys' presence. He turned from left to right, left to right holding his lantern farther out.

"Now what's this?" he wondered aloud, having spotted the mess in the Restricted Section. The boys glanced at each other. They were more than dead now. Filch would find them and they'd be scrubbing the floors for the rest of the year. But to their luck…

"PEEVES!" Filch barked, trudging to the pile of books that James had made. "I'LL HAVE YOU NOW PEEVES! Wait until the Headmaster hears about this one…" Filch laughed menacingly at the thought and went to fix the mess. Thinking they'd better leave now rather than later, the boys slipped out of the library and began making their way back towards Gryffindor Tower.

However the moment they'd reached the portrait of the slumbering Fat Lady, Peter remembered that they had to go retrieve a reversal potion for the one they'd given Lily.

"Can't we do that tomorrow?" James whined, wanting to go to sleep.

"No," said Sirius firmly. "Rachael's had to wear earplugs all day to drown out Lily. And, might I add, it was_ your _idea to give her the potion anyway."

"But-"

"Come on, James." Sirius and Peter grabbed James's shirt collar and pulled him off down in the direction of the dungeon. This was the one part of their evening trek they had not been looking forward to. If the rest of the castle was this dark, they could only imagine how pitch black the dungeons could be… and the dungeons were their least favourite part of the castle.

* * *

"The door's locked!" James said the moment he attempted to turn the doorknob to the storage room, only to discover that Professor Binstom had locked it. Immediately suggesting defeat, James made to run.

"James Potter, are you a wizard or not?" Sirius whispered in an offended tone. Sirius pushed James aside, nearly knocking the Invisibility Cloak off them in the process, whipped out his wand and muttered, "_Alohomora_." Sirius pushed the door open and gave James a knowing look. The boys removed the cloak (knowing that Binstom would not be awake at two on a Saturday morning), and James pocketed it this time. He knew they needed to avoid another close call.

The storage room was cold and damp and the jars of potions rattled noisily in the constant breeze. Peter pulled out his wand and lit it, guiding them to the potion they needed, which they hastily grabbed and dashed out of the dungeons and back up to Gryffindor Tower.


	31. A Second Chance

Chapter Thirty One  
A Second Chance

"Wow, Remus, you look terrible."

It was the morning after the boys trek to the dungeons and Remus had just appeared at breakfast, although he knew Madam Pomfrey wanted him to remain in the Hospital Wing for another day, as it had been a very horrible full moon. Remus had to endure a long painful transformation, with a particularly bright full moon, causing him to be as vicious as ever in his werewolf form. But of course with the absence of any humans, he resorted to biting and scratching himself.

Madam Pomfrey did her best to heal his bites and scratches, but he was still covered with marks, which was the reason for the nurse's reluctance in allowing him back into the main castle. But a bit of persuading made her cave in and he now found himself seated at the Gryffindor table.

"I feel terrible," he said, scanning the table for something to eat. Full moons didn't affect his appetite afterwards.

"Then why didn't you stay in the Hospital Wing?" James asked through a mouthful of oatmeal. Remus shrugged. He picked up an apple, put it on his plate and began pouring some pumpkin juice.

"Hey, Potter!" came a fierce voice from behind.

Startled, James wheeled around to see Lily stalking towards him, Rachael walking quickly to keep up with her friend's speed. "Err… hullo, Lily," he said, his voice lacking the usual confidence it usually had where Lily was concerned.

Lily bent down and glared James in the eye while he tried hard not to cower under her stare. "Don't you 'hullo, Lily' me," she snarled, her nostrils flaring dangerously. "What's the deal with giving me a Laughing Potion?"

James glanced over to Rachael, who shrugged. She was the only one, other than those, who knew about the potion. Unless she told… but Lily was smart enough to figure it out.

"Well I…uh…we," James stammered.

"Well…I…uh…will get you back for it!" and, with that, Lily stormed out of the hall, causing several heads to turn.

Rachael sat down next to James and looked at him sympathetically. "I'd watch yourself if I was you," she advised him, then grabbed an apple and went to go catch up with her friend.

Lily was positively fuming when Rachael caught her racing down the grassy slope out on the grounds, panting from trying to catch up with her friend's lightening pace. Lily had never liked James all that much. In fact she hated his guts, and this just set her over the edge. She finally caught up to Lily, who was still steaming.

"Calm down, Lily," Rachael said, completely out of breath.

"Why?" snapped Lily.

"It's not like they did any real harm."

Lily's eyes flashed dangerously. "Yeah it's just the most hilarious thing hearing me laugh all day long!"

"Uh… well it was kinda funny."

"Yep, just hysterical."

"Jeez, Lily, you're making more out of this then you should! It was a Laughing Potion for God's sake! It's not like he poisoned you!"

"Of course, side with James!"

"Oh come on-" but Lily was already marching back up to the castle. Rachael watched disbelievingly. "Well it _was_ pretty funny," she murmured to herself. Not bothering to go after her friend, she went over by the lake, picking up a stone and flinging it into the lake, not even flinching when the giant squid threw it back out.

* * *

Remus, James, Sirius and Peter sat in the Gryffindor common room, huddled over the table in the middle of the room, talking in hushed voices. James had just finished telling Remus about their trek to the library the night before and how it nearly ended in their getting caught.

"So I'm guessing the book's still in the library?" Remus asked.

Sirius nodded. "James here didn't see it necessary to listen to Peter and me," he answered, shooting James a glance. "You never stopped to think that they might've called it the Restricted Section for a reason did you?"

James grinned foolishly. "Well since it's over and we didn't get caught, can't you laugh about it?"

Sirius and Peter looked at each other skeptically and then back at James. "No!"

The four boys decided they were going to have to try and figure this out for themselves. Normal Transfiguration books were no help here if they couldn't get their hands on the one they needed. But the only problem was that they didn't know what they were supposed to do if they didn't know what animal they were going to turn into. How could they manage that? Their personalities only showed them so much, but not enough to know what animal they identified with.

"Remus," Peter said suddenly.

"What?"

"Can't you just try asking your dad again if he could give us permission?"

Remus shook his head. If he asked multiple times then his dad would begin to get really suspicious, more so than he already was. On several occasions Sirius and James asked Professor Lupin and each time the answer was a more forceful no. However the answer to their problem had just come walking through the portrait hole.

Rachael walked right past them, not even acknowledging them and went up to her dormitory. She came back down a minute later holding her copy of _Quidditch through the Ages_ under her arm and sat down in one of the armchairs. Before even beginning to read she sensed someone watching her and looked over the top of the book at the boys.

"May I help you?" she snapped. She had just spent the last ten minutes looking for Lily all over the castle. When she finally found her Lily snapped at her saying she wasn't talking to her. And Rachael decided to place the blame on her three friends, Peter, James and Sirius, who had gotten Lily mad at everyone.

"Yes you can in fact," said James, adopting a business like voice. Rachael raised an eyebrow at him. He quickly lost the voice. "Can you ask your dad about borrowing an Animagus book from the library?"

"And why would I do that?"

"'Cause he wouldn't be suspicious if _you_ asked him. Please?"

"I dunno if I'm up to doing anything for anyone who made my best friend mad at me."

"Do it for Remus!"

"No! Do it yourself!"

* * *

After that slight outburst the boys steered clear of Rachael for a while, besides, they needed all the time they could get plotting ways to secure an Animagus book. But all of their plans would never work. Remus seriously doubted flying a broomstick up four stories to the library window would work. Lily was still peeved by the fact that she had unwillingly drunken Laughing Potion. But she decided to focus most of her anger on James, not everyone else. Poor James was suffering from his crush's extreme animosity towards him. But he did his best to brush it off and pretend as though it didn't bother him.

The boys did eventually find a way to obtain a book about Animagi. They went to the library, pretending to help Remus look for a spell book because he'd missed classes, and they were supposedly assigned a spell book to look for and all the copies were gone. In reality they were looking for a spell book Sirius told them about. It had a special spell that could forge any handwriting for anyone. All they had to do was fill out the name of the person and their occupation. Though Remus found it very odd they didn't want more personal information; a spell this good should have been a little harder to do.

However he didn't concern himself with the facts, as long as they could do the spell and get it past Madam Pince, the incredibly strict librarian. They managed to retrieve the spell book and ran up to the common room, eager to begin the spell. They ran through the portrait hole, and were highly thankful upon discovering a completely empty common room. The four stooped down beside the table in front of the fireplace and opened the book.

The book was filled with loads of pictures of the process of Animagus transformations. It was a pretty gruesome process by the looks of it. Your whole body either lengthened or shortened itself in such detail that it made the boys almost consider forgetting about it.

But, of course, they couldn't let Remus down.

* * *

November slowly faded into December and a pure white blanket of snow covered all of the Hogwarts grounds. The students spent most of their free time having snowball fights, and ice-skating on the pond. The Gryffindors even took on an unsuspecting group of Slytherin fifth years in a snowball fight. Well technically the Gryffindors didn't take them on; they ambushed them. It was quite a sight. Even more so when a few wayward Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws got involved and helped the Gryffindors clobber the Slytherins.

Along with the heavy snowfall came a heavy homework fall. The teachers were relentlessly piling assignment upon assignment in every class. Every student in the school was collapsing from the amount. Professor McGonagall assigned them to read an entire chapter about turning a parakeet into a wine glass and then summarize it on a sheet and a half of parchment.

Professor Flitwick was the only teacher that had gone easy on them, after seeing his entire second year Gryffindor class on the verge of a nervous breakdown. All he asked of them was to review some spells, as he would be giving them a small quiz once the holiday break had concluded. Professor Binstom wanted them to write down the correct concoction for a Welt Potion: A potion that would give your enemy boils for a week upon drinking it. Everyone had a hard time figuring out why he had assigned them this potion, but they knew it would come in handy _one_ day.

All of the students were close to cracking under the pressure, but no one seemed closer to cracking then Rachael who, everyone began noticing, had become increasingly nervous and edgy. Once December 1st had rolled around she had taken on a twitchy manner, becoming highly uncomfortable, hardly talking and snapping whenever someone approached her. Remus couldn't understand it. It couldn't have been from the work they'd been given. He had all the same assignments and he wasn't as worse as her, neither was James, Sirius or Peter.

Lily tried talking to her about it on several occasions, but Rachael would just brush her off and leave the room to go find somewhere to do her work in peace. She wouldn't talk to anyone about what was bothering her. Not even her father who had confronted her about it just as much as her friends had. But no one would get an answer.

One day, a few days before everyone would be leaving for the Christmas holiday, Lily spotted her friend sitting in the corner of the dormitory, holding a book, but not reading it.

"Hey," Lily said pleasantly, sitting down in front of her friend.

"Hi," her friend answered quietly.

"So… are you going home for the holiday?"

"No. You are though, aren't you?" she snapped, though not meaning to. She never liked thinking about the fact that her friend had a family to go home to. Where did Rachael have to go? Definitely not the orphanage.

"Yes," Lily answered, a little taken aback. "I was just wondering…"

"You wanted to know if anything's bothering me. I know, Lily. I've only been asked this a million times."

"Well?"

"Nothing is bothering me! Can't a person be quiet if she wants to?"

"Well there's quiet and then there's _quiet_."

"I'm seeing no difference."

"But-"

"Lily, for the last time there's nothing wrong!"

* * *

"Merry Christmas!"

It was Christmas morning and the few remaining Gryffindors that hadn't gone home were gathered in the common room under the giant Christmas tree. There were two Gryffindor first years sitting on the stairs, opening a rather large stack of presents. A fourth year was sitting on one of the chairs, working on his gifts and Remus, Rachael and Sirius were sitting under the tree all tearing apart their gifts.

"Let's see, what did Mum give me this year?" Sirius wondered aloud, observing a rather small gift from his mother. He yanked off the green and silver wrapping paper and saw that he'd gotten a Remembral. "Whatever." And he set it down next to the giant book of pranks James had sent him from home. Remus was starting on a present from his mother, which turned out to be a box of Chocolate Frogs. Meanwhile, Rachael was working on her gift from her dad, a hand-knitted red jumper with a golden R.L. embellished on it.

"I didn't know Dad knew how to knit," Remus said slowly, looking at the jumper. His sister shrugged. She hadn't known that either. They spent most of the morning opening presents. Then they watched as Sirius let loose a whole bunch of frogs and laughed as they hopped about the common room. However, some came too close to the fireplace and Remus had to block it from them. They didn't want roasted chocolate frogs.

Around noon the three of them trooped down to the Great Hall for the Christmas feast. Sirius and Rachael were completely ravenous while Remus hardly ate anything. It was hard for him to think of a full moon on Christmas. He still managed to enjoy the feast. He spent a good portion of the time pulling every cracker within reach and in the end had a load of gifts in his lap.

Professor Lupin paid them a visit during the feast, wishing them a Merry Christmas and then went over to the staff table to talk to the teachers. Around four in the evening Remus bid Sirius and Rachael farewell and made his way to the Hospital Wing while they went back to Gryffindor Tower. They spent a good half hour playing Exploding Snap, though none of their matches lasted long as the cards were exploding at every possible moment.

At around four thirty Rachael stood up, saying she needed to go ask her dad something about the homework assignment. Sirius nodded and went to put the cards away while his friend left the common room. Rachael started in the direction of the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom, just in case Sirius wanted to catch up to her. But, as she neared the classroom, she quickly changed her course and ran down to the Entrance Hall and out of the castle.

Her heart was pumping wildly as she ran down the grassy slope on the grounds, this was it. She had been planning for months to do this… and now her time had finally come.

As she saw Madam Pomfrey approaching her she quickly ran to the nearest tree and hid herself behind it. She waited quietly as Madam Pomfrey went back up to the castle and Rachael quickly resumed her course to the Whomping Willow. The branches were still frozen, but were quivering slightly. She had to reach the tunnel before they started again. She ducked through the tunnel and slid down, finding herself in a dark pathway.

She broke into a fierce run down the path, listening to the moaning sounds coming from above in the Shrieking Shack. She quickened her pace and finally came upon the door leading to the Shrieking Shack.

* * *

"Professor, have you seen Rachael?" Sirius asked Professor Lupin, nearly a half an hour after his friend had left him.

"No," Professor Lupin answered. Then, slightly curious, he asked, "why?"

"She told me she was going to talk to you."

"Well I haven't seen her since the feast. Maybe she went down to the Great Hall?"

Sirius nodded and thanked the professor for his help. He would go down to the Great Hall and look for his friend. But as he walked down the deserted corridor he felt that something wasn't right, but something was finally making sense… Without going to the Great Hall, Sirius broke into a run, straight for the Whomping Willow.

* * *

Rachael cautiously climbed the steps of the building to where the loud groans of pain were still coming. Remus was still in his human state. She had to go slowly if this was going to work. As she stopped on the landing the groaning was replaced by low frequency growling. This was it…

Heart pounding wildly, she opened the door to where her brother was and saw instead of him, a full grown, bloodthirsty werewolf. The werewolf didn't notice her at first, as it was still sniffing at its surroundings. The werewolf walked around in a circle, shoulders arched as it bent down and sniffed the floor, its eyes not seeing Rachael, or its nose smelling her presence. She stood there, watching it with bated breath as its head turned slowly, finally spotting a human.

Slowly the werewolf walked towards her, at last finding some food, though not realising who it was. As the werewolf approached, Rachael realised that she wasn't going to come out of this alive. The werewolf had cornered her. She was nowhere near an escape. This was the end for her. The wolf raised a sharp claw and brought it sweeping down, slicing Rachael's face. She felt warm blood begin dripping down her cheek as the wolf brought his claw down again, this time catching the sleeve of her robe and slashing her arm.

The wolf didn't seem to want to bite her; it just wanted to kill her. She was going to die here and the first person to find her would be her brother. He would know what happened. Then, as though reading her very thoughts, the werewolf opened his jaw and went in for the bite.

"_Stupefy_!" came a loud, forceful voice from the doorway.

The wolf stood frozen as Sirius stunned him. Sirius stood at the doorway, waiting to see if he'd really stunned Remus. When the wolf didn't move, he knew he was stunned. He ran over to his friend, who was sitting against the wall with a look of pure terror on her face.  
"Are you okay?" he asked, still eyeing the werewolf worriedly. His friend didn't answer she was still too terrified. "Come on; let's go back up to the castle."

* * *

"What happened to her?" Madam Pomfrey shrieked when Sirius and Rachael appeared in the hospital wing fifteen minutes later.

Sirius shrugged. "I dunno, maybe a Slytherin did it," he said in his most convincing voice.

Madam Pomfrey looked at him skeptically, but didn't question him further. She sat Rachael down on the bed and began examining her cuts, which were still oozing warm blood. She clicked her tongue annoyingly and went off to her office to get a potion.

"Those are some nasty cuts," she commented as she made her way to the office door. "Must've been some brute of a Slytherin. They may be infected, so you'll need to spend the night."

Rachael nodded despondently. Sirius took a seat on the bed across from his friend.

"Why'd you do that?" he asked disbelievingly, shaking his head. "_How_ could you do that?"

"I don't know," she answered, her voice cracking. She'd never been so scared in her life. Why was she that stupid? Sirius was right! How could she have done that? She nearly killed herself!

"You're lucky I knew where you were going!" Sirius said, his voice getting louder with every word. "You could've killed yourself!"

"I know!"

"Do you know how scared I was when I realised what you were doing? I was scared out of my mind!"

Sirius didn't like yelling at his friend when she was like this. But he couldn't find any way better to talk to her. Yelling was the only way to get her to understand the terror he felt a mere hour ago.

"I know, Sirius! And I'm sorry! I was an idiot! I was so stupid to do what I did and I'm sorry!" She couldn't hold it in anymore. The terror that had been threatening to come out of since the moment she set foot in the Shrieking Shack came out. She just began crying. Sirius looked at his friend pityingly. He knew she was sorry and he knew that she was just as scared as he was. He pulled her into a hug and patted her on the back.

"I know you're sorry," he said comfortingly. "I was just afraid you'd end up like your brother. Neither of you deserve to be a werewolf."

"But what if that's what I wanted?" Rachael said, wiping her eyes as her sleeve as she pulled away from Sirius.

Sirius blinked. "What? Why?"

"Because… if I were a werewolf my mum would love me again. She was always comparing me with my brother and then she wouldn't be able to compare us anymore if I was like him. If I were a werewolf my mother would love me again, like she used to. She wouldn't call me an, 'evil liar' or a 'sorry excuse for a daughter.' She'd know I have a name and that I'm her daughter. I just wanted to be treated like I used to and that was the only way I could do it."

"You're wrong," Sirius said quietly. "You don't have to do all of that just to get a woman like your mother to love you again. You're a great person. You don't have to prove yourself to her. Your mother just won't open her eyes to that. If she can't love you for the way you are than she isn't worth the trouble."

Rachael smiled. "Thanks, Sirius… for saving my life and telling me that. You really don't know how much that means to me."

"What can I say? You're a great friend. I didn't want to lose you, and you deserve to know that."

Just then Madam Pomfrey reentered the room, her arms full of potions. She struggled over to the nightstand and began dropping the potion bottles on top of it, carefully avoiding dropping them.

"Mr. Black," she said, turning to Sirius. "I think you should head up to Gryffindor Tower."

He nodded and stood up. "Feel better," he said to Rachael, and with that he was gone.

Madam Pomfrey began pouring the potions into a single bowl, all the while muttering about how horrible some Slytherins could be that they did this to a girl. Rachael couldn't help but feel a bit guilty. She couldn't tell Madam Pomfrey what she had really done. She knew though that some unsuspecting Slytherin was going to be in detention this time tomorrow.

Once Madam Pomfrey had finished applying the sizzling hot potions to Rachael's cuts, she left the room. Rachael lay back on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. This had definitely been the most memorable Christmas she'd ever had. She could hardly believe that a few hours ago she and her friends had been opening gifts and feasting in the Great Hall. Now she was sitting in the Hospital Wing after being attacked by a werewolf on her own will.

She knew why she'd done it, now she wondered why she hadn't thought like Sirius. Sirius was right. Her mother wasn't worth the trouble if she had to go through this to earn her love back. She didn't know what she would've done if Sirius hadn't come to help her. He was really the greatest friend anyone could ask for.

* * *

Sirius was walking back up to Gryffindor Tower when he saw Professor Lupin walking in his direction. When he saw Sirius walking his way he grinned.

"Hullo, Sirius," he said merrily, stopping when he approached the student.

"Hi, Professor," Sirius answered. "Um, d'you mind if I talk to you for a minute?"

"Not at all." Professor Lupin brought Sirius to his office and sat him down. Sirius began telling him about what his daughter had done. How she'd gone to the Whomping Willow, hoping that Remus in his werewolf form would bite her and make her a werewolf like him. That she'd hoped that it could be the answer to all of her problems. That it would make her mother love her again, and that she knew she might get killed in the process. And that even the very thought of death hadn't stopped her.

"Is she alright now?" the professor asked, his voice full of concern.

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, she's fine," he answered. "Madam Pomfrey's taking care of her."

"Did you tell her why my daughter did this?"

"No, I told her that some Slytherin did it."

Professor Lupin smiled. "Classic Gryffindor answer. If you'll excuse me, Sirius, I need to visit my daughter and write a letter."

"No problem, G'night, Professor."

"Night, Sirius."

Professor Lupin waited until Sirius had shut the door before he ducked down and pulled out a sheet of parchment from his desk. He sat down and took his quill out of the inkbottle and began writing. When he was finished the letter read:

_Dear Anna,_

_One of my students, whom I sure you remember from when he stayed over the house this summer, Sirius, has just informed me of something that I think you might take interest in. Tonight, as you well know, is a full moon and earlier this evening our daughter followed Remus down to the Whomping Willow where he would transform. You might wonder, though I highly doubt you are, why she did this? I'll be very glad to answer this… she did it because of you!_

_She wanted to be an equal in your eye. She wanted your love and respect. She seemed to get the idea from you that if she was like her brother, whom you love and adore, that you would love her again. She wanted you to love her so she nearly killed herself because of you! Please think about this. Your daughter loves you even if you don't love her, the least you could do is talk to her about this. Do you honestly want you daughter to do this again and possibly die?_

_Sincerely,  
__Gregory._

Professor Lupin read the letter over, making sure he'd worded it exactly the way he wanted it. And when he decided it was perfect, he placed it in an envelope, pocketed it, and went off to the Hospital Wing. When he reached the Wing he knocked gently on the door.

"Good evening, Professor," said Madam Pomfrey when she opened the door. "I'm assuming you'd like to see your daughter?"

"Yes, Poppy, I would," Professor Lupin answered kindly.

Madam Pomfrey nodded and stepped aside to let the teacher in. Once he stepped foot on the threshold she immediately began ranting about the Slytherin (whom she had no idea didn't exist) who did this. Professor Lupin just nodded and smiled patiently as he listened to the nurse's story. Finally though she just got too detailed about something she didn't know and he kindly asked if he could speak to his daughter privately. Madam Pomfrey nodded and quickly bustled out of the room.

Professor Lupin walked over and sat down at the foot of his daughter's bed. "How are you?" he asked, watching his daughter carefully.

"Fine," she answered, although she could have been better.

"How could you-"

"Please, Dad," Rachael cut him off. "Sirius already gave me the 'how could you' lecture."

Professor Lupin smiled. "Did he now?"

"Yes and he got through to me pretty well."

"Good, I just hope you know never to do something like that again."

"I'm not going to, Mum's not worth it."

Professor Lupin clicked his tongue.

"You can't say that," he said quietly, getting up and heading for the door. "Everyone deserves a chance to change. Just as you tried to prove that to your mother, one day she's going to prove it to you. Everyone deserves a second chance."


	32. A Chance To Explain

Chapter Thirty Two  
A Chance to Explain

Anna Lupin sat at her kitchen table, clutching a letter some unfamiliar owl had just given her. She hadn't looked at the name yet, but somehow she had a feeling that it wasn't from one of her favourite people. Sure enough when she looked at the return address she saw that it definitely wasn't. She did not want to read a letter from Greg, but when it said "**URGENT**" in big bold letters, she couldn't resist opening it.

She tore the envelope; with the thought of maybe something happened to Remus. However, when she read it she saw quite the opposite. She read the letter slowly, a small pit of anger bubbling in her the pit of her stomach. Why did her husband have to bother her with such things? She didn't care what that girl did. As far as she was concerned, her mere presence there could've scared Remus.

But suddenly her thoughts were interrupted by a loud thud coming from the living room. She jumped up from her seat and dashed into the other room, skidding to a halt when she saw who it was.

"What do _you_ want?" she snarled.

"To talk to you," Professor Lupin answered, removing himself from the fireplace and dusting his robes off. "Because I knew you weren't going to take the letter seriously."

"Who said I didn't take the letter seriously?" his wife retorted coldly.

"Well then I knew you weren't going to care, like always. You never care about your daughter."

"Why are you here?" his wife yelled, getting fed up with her husband already.

"To talk to you!" he yelled back, equally louder than his wife. "Please, Anna, just listen to me."

Defeated and knowing that he would never leave, Anna nodded and gestured for her husband to sit down. "You want to talk, talk then!"

Professor Lupin took a deep breath and began.

"Okay you read in my letter what our daughter did?" She nodded. "She did it because of you. The least you could do is talk to her about it, in a nice way, not shouting or in horrible letters like you usually do."

"Why should I talk to her? After what she did to my son-"

"After what you _think_ she did! You have no proof! You weren't there in the forest with them. You didn't see what happened! How could just accuse her of this? And then when she really shows she wants to be a daughter to you, you shun her. And what I told her before, I was wrong. _You_ don't deserve a second chance." And with a faint, but furious, crack, he was gone.

Anna shook her head as she watched her husband Apparate. Who was he to tell her what to do? If she didn't want to talk to that girl then why did he keep insisting she should? On September first he wasted his time trying to convince her to see differently, to try and give her a talk without shouting. Why would she need to forgive her daughter? She saw no reason to.

* * *

Rachael woke the next morning, still in the Hospital Wing. She rolled over onto her back and looked up at the ceiling. Her face still stung from the potions. She figured they didn't do anything except inflame her cuts even more. But she knew Madam Pomfrey knew what she was doing.

She sat up and saw Remus lying in the bed across from hers. He looked terrible. His face was covered in marks, and his arms covered in bites, his face pale and weary. He didn't look as though he was going to wake up any time soon, so Rachael was forced to sit quietly until Madam Pomfrey came in. Rachael looked out the window to discover a freshly fallen layer of snow out on the grounds. She sighed. She knew Madam Pomfrey wouldn't allow her to go outside, or if Madam Pomfrey would allow it, her father certainly wouldn't.

She leaned back on her pillow and waited patiently for Madam Pomfrey to wake up and let her leave. She wanted desperately to go back up to Gryffindor Tower. Luckily she didn't have to wait too long because only ten minutes after she woke, Madam Pomfrey came bustling into the room carrying a tray of food.

"Good morning," she said, setting the tray down on Rachael's nightstand.

"Good morning," Rachael replied.

Madam Pomfrey knelt down so she was eye level with Rachael and began observing her patient's cuts. They were still there, but they would eventually turn into barely noticeable scars, just exactly as she had planned. She stood up and went over to check on Remus, who was still sound asleep and probably wouldn't be up for a few more hours.

"Once you finish eating you may leave," said the nurse, gathering up so sheets off one of the beds. "But I would not like you to go outside." She left the room and Rachael finished her breakfast and high tailed it out of the Hospital Wing as fast as she could.

She walked down the cold, completely deserted corridor, shivering slightly, and walked up to the seventh floor. She wasn't in a rush though to get to the common room. She knew she was going to run into Sirius. She didn't feel like talking to him since she was nearly positive he was going to bring up the night before and she wasn't willing to talk about it. It was still completely unreal to her that she'd actually risked her life. She needed to let it sink in and a day wasn't enough time for that. So she was in no hurry.

As she walked she heard another set of footsteps coming towards her. Thinking it was Filch taking Mrs. Norris out for a stroll, she paid no mind to it. She sighed. Thinking about the night before was something she wanted to stop doing and yet she couldn't help it. Every time she thought of being in the Shrieking Shack, almost about to be turned into a werewolf, she would silently curse herself for being so stupid. She felt bad for Sirius too. She had caused him such a scare she couldn't even imagine it. It must have been the most horrible thing for him to discover.

Suddenly her thoughts were disrupted by a sneer. She looked up and saw Severus Snape standing a few feet away from her, a smirk playing on his lips. She'd forgotten that he decided to stay at the castle for the holidays… though it wasn't surprising. Who would want him on Christmas? Sighing in frustration, she walked casually up to Snape, as he was blocking her only means of exit.

"Hullo, Snape," she said, keeping her voice even.

"Hullo, Lupin," he said in an unhinging voice.

Rachael didn't like the way he said that. The last time she encountered him _alone_ in a hallway it resulted in a near duel and it had not come off very well. Rachael looked around, hoping for a professor to come by. She did not want to get into a duel with Snape. "Yeah well… I should be getting to the common room," she said, trying to make a break for the stairs, but Snape blocked her.

"Oh I don't think you will be," he said slyly. "I have a question for you."

"Snape just let me leave!"

"Answer my question first."

"FINE!"

"Would you mind telling me why you were going to the Whomping Willow last night?"

How did he know that? Was he a stalker or something? Though severely rattled by hearing that question, Rachael remained calm and collected, though her hand was slowly drifting towards the pocket of her robes containing her wand. Snape smiled; despite his adversary's composed face he knew he had touched a nerve. He inclined his head as though asking if she was going to answer any time soon.

Not knowing what to say, Rachael didn't say anything. She merely tried shoving past Snape. Surprisingly enough, Snape stepped aside and let her through. However he didn't let her leave quietly. As she progressed down the hallway he let his voice follow,

"Lupin's got a secret!" he taunted, watching gleefully as she quickened her pace. "What could it be?"

"Shove it, Snape!" Rachael hollered back, turning sharply around the corner. She ran down the hallway, trying to rid her mind of that encounter. How had Snape known where she'd gone the night before? Why would he even bother to find out? _What's he stalking me_? She thought as she spun her wand absentmindedly around her fingers. The very thought scared her to death. But, then again, maybe it wasn't _her_ he was watching. After all she'd only gone there twice in her life. The first time had been in her first year when Madam Pomfrey had accidentally left Remus in the Shrieking Shack and the second time was the night before.

Maybe Snape was trying to find out where Remus went every month. He was sure to start getting curious about his whereabouts eventually. Still… Snape shouldn't care about those things. His big ugly brain couldn't comprehend them probably. Looking behind her to make sure Snape was clear out of sight; Rachael went on to Gryffindor Tower.

She approached the portrait of the Fat Lady, who was immersed in a conversation with Sir Cadogan, a knight from one of the portraits on the way up to the North Tower.

"Goblins!" Rachael shouted over the knight's barking laughs.

When he heard the word Goblins, he immediately withdrew his sword from its shaft and looked wildly around. "Goblin?" he cried. "Where?" He then spotted Rachael, who was watching him with an odd expression on her face. "Good lady! Where is this goblin you speak of?"

The Fat Lady laughed. "No, that's the password," she explained as she swung open, letting the Gryffindor enter.

She hopped through the portrait hole and saw an empty common room. Sighing in relief, she sat down in front of the fire. _A moment of peace finally_, she thought gratefully. She gazed lazily into the crackling fire, her eyes slipping in and out of focus. Despite the fact that she'd just woken up, she still felt incredibly tired. Trying to stay awake she gently slapped herself in the face. It didn't work too well, but it did wake her up somewhat.

The fire continued crackling in a way that made you want to drop off. Slowly and steadily Rachael found herself doing that… but didn't protest this time. She needed the peace and quiet and sleep was the one way to get it. She shut her eyes and let her mind wander off until she fell into a deep sleep.

She had a very odd dream… She was sitting in an old house, though it had the look of a house that was once very fine and belonged to a rich family. Though the silver set in front of her was tarnished, and the table she was sitting at was wobbly on one leg, the house could have been quite nice in its day. She looked around the room and suddenly realised she wasn't there by herself. There was someone else sitting at the table with her. A girl she had never seen before was watching her with an expression of both nervousness and anger.

As Rachael looked more closely at the girl, she noticed a strange resemblance between the girl and herself. They had the same hair, and facial structure. The only thing different was their eyes. This girl did not have the green eyes that Rachael did. This girl had bright blue eyes. They struck Rachael as oddly familiar, though she couldn't place where she had seen them before. She wondered where… Again she looked more closely and noticed something else different, and rather disturbing.

The girl's face was covered in light scars, a pale pinkish reddish colour. Her eyes had bags under them. She looked highly worn out, and as though she could just drop to sleep right then and there. Then someone else entered the room, and she knew who this person was. It was a man who looked to be in his late thirties or early forties. He walked into the room, wearing a look of great strain on his face. At first glance, this man could have passed for Gregory Lupin, he looked exactly like him.

But, taking a second glance, Rachael knew who this was… it was her brother. But what was he doing here? And why was this girl here? And what was here anyway?

Remus turned to look at her. "Rachael…" but it was a distant voice. "Wake up…"

Rachael was being shaken awake by her brother. Rachael sat up, having slid over sideways when she had fallen asleep. She looked at the blurry image of her brother standing in front of her. Slightly annoyed at being disturbed, Rachael lifted herself up, waiting for her brother to say something.

"Good morning," said Remus in a cheerful, yet exhausted voice.

"Morning," his sister answered a little uneasily. Had he run into Sirius? If he did, did Sirius tell him what she'd done? She hoped he hadn't. How was she going to explain this?

"Slept well I see," he said sarcastically, dropping into the seat behind him and resting his head on his hands.

"Looks like you did too," she retorted, doing her best to keep the atmosphere light.

Remus nodded his head absentmindedly, for he'd just noticed several cuts and scrapes on his sister's face. Where had she gotten those? They couldn't have been from a Slytherin like Madam Pomfrey had told him. Those did _not_ look like fingernail marks. Fingernails couldn't possibly make scratches like those.

As a matter of fact, crazy as it seemed, they looked remarkably like _werewolf scratches._ Inattentively, he gazed at the back of his hand and observed the scratches he'd gotten from the night before. He let his hand drop down off the side of the chair and looked blankly at the wall across from him. But if they really _were_ scratches from a werewolf, she couldn't have… or did she? But why? He shook his head, he was thinking crazy. It was possible for a person to do that… especially a Slytherin.

Still… it was highly unlikely that she did anything to provoke a Slytherin that much. Not with the way she'd been acting lately. She was so quiet and closed up that she probably wouldn't even acknowledge a Slytherin if it danced around and spit nickels, though maybe if one provoked her… she'd been on edge lately… especially yesterday. He hadn't the slightest doubt that if a Slytherin said something foul to her she'd be yelling at the top of her lungs.

Then again, he'd walked by the hourglass on his was up here, no points were taken. He was positive that if she was caught in a fight with a Slytherin, Professor Binstom would have subtracted fifty points from Gryffindor. It _had_ to be… but the thing of it was… Remus didn't want to believe it. Why would she do such a thing? It wasn't anything like her, not a bit like her at all.

"Rachael," he said slowly, cautiously. She grunted in response, wanting to drop back off and finish that dream she had. "Where did you get those cuts?" He gestured warily to the several scratches on her face. She shrugged. How could she explain it to him? "Come on," Remus persisted. "You had to have gotten them from somewhere."

"A Slytherin," she answered simply.

"Are you sure?" he asked. He still wasn't convinced, but why would she lie to him?

"Yes I'm sure."

* * *

A Slytherin? A _Slytherin_? What the heck was she playing at? Who did she think she could fool? Well obviously she'd fooled her brother, but still. Sirius sat up in his dormitory, his mind racing at the conversation he'd just heard. How could she just lie to him about something as important as this? Though _he_ was the one who had made up the story, it was only covering the truth from Madam Pomfrey.

The one person this shouldn't be kept from was Remus. He, out of all people, deserved to know. But then why wasn't she telling him? Was she afraid that he would be angry and take it out on her? Why would she think that? He was her brother, for Christ's sake! He would never do that and yet she thought he would.

"Sirius," came a voice from the doorway.

Sirius turned around in his chair and saw Remus coming through the door into the room. "Hey, Remus," Sirius said, keeping his voice as even as he could. "How're you feeling?"

"Alright," Remus answered, sitting down on his bed and removing his cloak. "Just a bit tired."

Sirius nodded and tried returning to his Transfiguration homework.

"Hey, Sirius," Remus said suddenly. "Do you know if any Slytherin happens to be serving detention?"

Sirius whipped his head around at Remus. He had actually fallen for it? Remus was supposed to be the smart one, the one who knew when he was being lied to. Sirius didn't want to answer this question. He felt like he'd be betraying Rachael since she clearly didn't want to tell Remus. But then he would feel like he was betraying Remus too. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place. On the one hand he'd be doing both of his friends a favour by divulging to Remus his sister's secret. On the other hand, however, he would be betraying her if he told.

"Sirius," said Remus again. "Is there?"

Sirius didn't know what he should do, but he did know what he had to do. He just prayed that she wouldn't be mad at him. Slowly he shook his head in response. "No, Remus," he said quietly. "There isn't."

Remus didn't say anything in response, or do anything in response. His worst fears were confirmed. _Please tell me I didn't bite her_, he thought frantically.

"Then… those scratches… those marks… they weren't from a Slytherin. A Ravenclaw?" he asked hopefully. But Sirius shook his head. "A Hufflepuff?" Sirius shook his head again. Remus couldn't believe it. "Would they be, by any chance, from a werewolf?"

Sirius flinched. He hadn't expected Remus to ask that so quickly. He thought his friend might've beaten around the bush for at least more than thirty seconds. But Remus wanted to know and Sirius couldn't stop him from finding out.

"Yes, Remus, they did."

"But… why? How?" Remus was now standing up and advancing towards Sirius.

"Remus, sit back down," Sirius said in an exasperated voice. "I need to explain this to you." Remus hesitated, he was ready to go downstairs and wring the explanation out of his sister. Why bother getting one from Sirius? "Sit, Remus," Sirius ordered again.

Reluctantly, Remus heeded his friend's request. "Why'd she do it?" he asked again, dreading the response he would get.

"Because… because…." Sirius couldn't figure out quite how to explain it. It wasn't just something that rolled off your tongue, telling your best friend that his sister wanted to be a werewolf for such a reason. "Remus, your sister followed you on purpose to the Whomping Willow."

Remus's eyes widened in fury, _what?_ "What?" he yelled. "How could she do that? What's wrong with her?" He was now on his feet again, this time determined to go downstairs and wring the _stupidity_ out of her.

"Remus, sit!" Sirius yelled; his voice firm and yet frightened. He had never seen this side of his friend before. "Don't go down there and yell at her," he said softly. "She feels bad enough."

"But how could she be so stupid?"

"Remus, she feels stupid, she feels bad. She feels worse than she ever has! Don't you think that's enough? She doesn't need you down there yelling at her."

Remus slowly backed away from the door and removed his hand from the knob. "But she needs to be!"

"Yes she does. But she's already gotten yelled at! I made her feel bad enough yesterday. Just let me explain to you _why_ she did it."

Remus once again, very reluctantly, retreated back to his bed and sat down. "Okay, Sirius," he said; his voice full of anger. "Why? What possessed her to act so stupid?"

Sirius sighed. "She did it because she wants to be like you!" he yelled. "She thinks that if she's like you then your mum will love her again!"

"Wh-what?" he said. He didn't know what to say. He never thought that it bothered her _this _much. Remus always knew his sister was always troubled by her mother, but he never thought she'd ever take it to this level. Right now he bet he felt just as worse as his sister did. How could his sister just do this? She could have been killed! _He_ could have killed her! How could she just do that and let him rest with this on his conscience.

"She wanted to be treated like an equal and she couldn't find any other way to do it," Sirius explained heavily.

"She couldn't just _talk_ to Mum? She had to do something this desperate!"

"Remus, you know as well as I do that every time she owls that woman that she ends up getting yelled at! She _was_ desperate! So you can't exactly blame her for acting desperate!"

"But-"

"Remus, no matter how much you argue against it you can't blame her and you can't be angry at her. She just wanted life to be normal again. Like it was before you were a werewolf. Even if you still were one, that nothing would be different and that she didn't have to leave."

"But I could've _killed_ her!"

"But you didn't. And even if you did, no one was going to blame you. You know it wouldn't have been you who killed her, it would've been the werewolf."

"But-"

"Remus, just go talk to her, she needs a brother right now."

* * *

Remus tried to retain his anger as he walked down the steps into the common room. He didn't want to yell at her, as Sirius had already done that for him. He jumped off the last step and looked to see his sister in the same spot as when he left her. She was staring into the fire, looking as though she was in deep thought.

"Hey," Remus said, struggling to keep the anger out of his voice. _Don't get mad, don't get mad, don't get mad_. She looked up at him in acknowledgment. "I found the, uh, the Slytherin." His sister raised an eyebrow, now he was getting somewhere. Maybe he didn't have to say anything at all; she might just let it slide.

"You did?" she asked, fighting to keep her shock out of her voice. "Who?"

"The Slytherin?" he said in a casual voice, sticking his hands in his pockets and walking around. "Oh he was… well you know… he was me!" He had said it a little louder than he meant to, but he wasn't sorry he did.

"Remus, I-"

"'Remus, I-,' what? Remus, I just felt like following you so you can turn into a werewolf and kill me? Remus, I should be saying I'm sorry for almost making you a killer? Remus, I WHAT?"

Rachael looked like she was on the verge of tears. But she didn't let any flow. "Remus, I'm sorry!"

But Remus didn't care how sorry she was. She could be on her knees begging for forgiveness but he wasn't going to let his anger pass that easily.

"Damn right you are! You should be sorry! You could've made me a killer! You could've made Mum disown me!"

"Well then you'd know why I did what I did." And with that she stormed out of the common room.

Remus watched her go, but he didn't feel a hint of remorse. It was as if some unknown force had taken over and forcing him to act mean and nasty. He didn't care though; he didn't care if she was upset about it for weeks. Honestly, putting him in that position. What was she thinking? As a matter of fact, _was_ she even thinking? He highly doubted it. He threw himself down in a chair. It wasn't even eleven in the morning and it felt like it should be eleven at night, so much junk had gone on.

"Remus!" came Sirius's voice from behind him. Remus grunted in response. What did he want? "What's wrong with you?"

"I believe the correct question is 'what's wrong with her?'"

This got Sirius mad, madder than he had been after he heard his friend shouting moments before. He stalked up to Remus and shook him by the shoulders, as though ridding him of some evil thoughts.

"Remus!" he yelled. "What's the matter with you? Why're you acting like this? What's your problem?"

"I have no problem!" Remus shouted. "Maybe you should be asking her that question!"

Sirius looked as though he'd been slapped. What wasn't Remus getting? Did he not understand that she was sorry? Didn't he know that yelling wasn't the way to solve this? "Okay, I'll go ask her that question!" he lied and stormed off to go find his friend.

Remus shook head. He honestly didn't think he was wrong.

* * *

Sirius walked briskly down the hallway, positively fuming. He couldn't comprehend what was making Remus acting in such a way. Remus had never been one to yell much, not even when he and James were in a fight. Remus had withdrawn then. But now… now he was shouting at every chance he got. Things were just becoming way too confusing for Sirius to handle. One minute he and his friends are enjoying the Christmas Feast, the next he's chasing one to the Whomping Willow and shaking his other friend.

Why wouldn't Remus listen to him? Why was he being so stubborn? Was it because he was afraid of what he might have done? _Well of course that's one of the reasons_. Maybe he didn't want to face facts and realise that there was something wrong with his sister? There had to be something wrong, not just the fact she wanted to be treated as an equal. She had wanted that last year and ever since she first went to the orphanage.

There just had to be something else. He just couldn't think of what it might be. He quickened his pace as he walked, hoping that he would find her. He couldn't help but remember, as he walked, the story Remus had told him. Over the summer, Sirius had asked how his sister's life was at the orphanage, if he knew anything that was. Remus had been very hesitant to answer that question, as he knew really very few stories about it and one wasn't the best one. But Remus felt that if there was one person he could trust with that information, it was Sirius. Sirius would keep it quiet. He wouldn't mention it to anyone, not even Rachael herself.

Rachael had just gotten too stressed out over everything. The orphanage was like a living hell. She couldn't take it anymore, it was horrible! Everything was closing in on her and she just wanted to end it all by performing the Killing Curse on herself. That had been from kids she didn't like harassing her. He could hardly imagine what she would do to herself if it was her _brother_! He trembled involuntarily at the thought. _I've gotta find her_! he thought, breaking into a furious run.

He ran down the flight of steps in the Entrance Hall and turned right into a mad dash into the Great Hall, hoping to find a sign of his friend. But, as he looked around, he saw she wasn't there. There were only a few professors up at the staff table and one or two of the students who had chosen to remain at Hogwarts over the break. But maybe Professor Lupin was there. Sirius could definitely talk to him right about now. Professor Lupin, however, wasn't there either.

Sirius's heart began pumping wildly. Where could she have gone? He looked around wildly, ignoring Professor McGonagall when she told him to take a seat; he just dashed out of the hall again. He stood in front of the giant double doors, scratching his head, trying desperately to figure out where she would've gone. Perhaps she went to Hagrid's? But his answer to that question was answered as Hagrid came walking in.

"Hagrid!" Sirius called.

Hagrid smiled and approached the boy. "Hey there, Sirius," he said pleasantly.

"Have you seen Rachael?"

"No," Hagrid answered in a plain voice, but when he saw the look of dread appear on the boy's face his tone changed. "Why?"

Sirius looked around, making sure there were no nosey students within earshot. "I'm scared, she and Remus had a fight and she ran off."

"How bad was the fight?" Hagrid asked, his voice sounding worried.

"Bad, Hagrid. Remus said some things I know he didn't mean but… she took them hard. I've gotta find her before she does something she regrets!"

"Where do we start then?" Hagrid asked. "I'll help yeh find her."

Sirius shook his head; he didn't know where to start. He had no idea where she could be. Hagrid on the other hand seemed to have an idea. He pushed Sirius forward and they ran up the stairs in the direction of the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom. Sirius didn't know why they were bothering to go there. If she had wanted to be alone then that was the last place she would've gone. But Hagrid must have known something.

They burst through the door and found Professor Lupin sitting at his desk grading some papers. He looked up curiously when the two came into the room, both short of breath and gasping for air.

"Can I help you?" he asked. Hagrid walked forward and whispered into the Professor's ear. "WHAT?" Professor Lupin yelled, jumping to his feet. "What do you mean she's missing? Why's she missing?" Hagrid put a massive hand on the man's shoulder and pushed him back down into his seat and tried to explain the situation to him. But Professor Lupin just wouldn't listen, how could he? His daughter was missing! "I'm not sitting here listening to explanations!" he shouted, jumping to his feet again. "I'm going to find her!"

"Dad, you don't need to," came a small voice from the doorway. The three turned around to see Rachael standing there, red faced and her eyes bloodshot. Obviously she had done some serious crying.

Professor Lupin sighed in relief. "Rachael," he said exasperatedly. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, Dad," she lied. "I'm fine." She was lying through her teeth. Sirius knew it, just like she had lied to Remus, and just like he, Sirius, had lied to him. But he didn't say anything, not in front of the professor anyway.

"Where'd you go?" her dad asked.

She shook her head. "Just somewhere," she replied vaguely. "I really needed to think."

"Okay, I'm just glad you're alright."

She nodded and left the room without even acknowledging Sirius and Hagrid. Sirius thanked Hagrid for his help, said goodbye to his teacher, and ran to catch up with Rachael.

"Are you really okay?" Sirius asked her when he caught up with her. She didn't answer; she just tried brushing him off. "Come on," he persisted. "Are you?"

"You heard my brother yelling at me," she choked. "You think I'm alright after that?"

"I know… you'll be fine," he said encouragingly, though he doubted in his mind that she would be all right for a while. Not after that fight at least.

* * *

Remus slowly turned the doorknob and swung the door open and walked into the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom. He was here on his father's orders of course. Professor Lupin had come up to him in the Great Hall during dinner and asked to speak with him later. Remus knew what his father wanted to talk to him about. He was so sick of discussing his sister. Couldn't everyone just leave it alone? How would anyone expect him to forgive her when they kept hounding him about it? Sirius was using every opportunity to talk to him about it. Hagrid had talked to him out on the grounds. His sister, well she hadn't been seen since she was talking to Sirius. But Sirius wasn't worried since she said she just needed to be alone and for him not to go looking for her. Now Professor Lupin was going to bother him about it. Couldn't they just let him handle this on his own? He was twelve years old, for goodness's sake!

Remus walked through the rows of desks towards the office door in the back of the room. He tapped the door lightly, hoping that maybe his father wouldn't hear him. But to his misfortune,

"Come in, Remus."

Highly reluctant Remus entered the room. As he opened the door he couldn't help but think, _if I walk away now he'll never know I was here_. But that thought was futile because his father pulled the door open and he fell into the room. Professor Lupin knelt down and held out a hand to his son, who gratefully took it.

"Sit, Remus," said Professor Lupin, striding over to his desk and pulling out a chair. He sat down opposite his son and leaned forward on the desk. "So, enjoying your vacation?"

Remus raised an eyebrow, what kind of question was that? Remus spent his whole dinner preparing to be yelled at, not being asked how his vacation was going.

"Uh… yeah?" he answered uncertainly.

His father smiled, with a hint of glory in his eyes.

"Good, son," he said in a brisk voice, slapping a hand down on the desk. "Because it's not going to be fun anymore."

This is what he had been dreading…. His dad was going to relentlessly ground him. That was the downside to having your dad as a professor. You could still be grounded.

"What are you going to do to me?" he asked, fear evident in his voice.

Professor Lupin smiled. "Well you know," he said slowly. "I'm not quite sure… Grounding wouldn't help, would it? It's got to be something more elaborate!" The professor threw his arms in the air, motioning for elaborate. Remus sighed in disgust. He didn't have time for his father's antics. "What do you suggest?"

"Letting me off the hook?"

His father chuckled.

"No. Seriously, Remus, I'm giving you the chance to make your own punishment. You're old enough to know what you need to do."

Remus groaned, now he knew he couldn't let himself off easily. But still, he couldn't think of any punishment that fit the situation. What was he going to do? Bite himself on the next full moon? He did that without being told to. Well he knew one thing he had to do, and right now he felt he really needed to do it.

"Apologise to my sister," he said. His father nodding, looking highly pleased. "And for my punishment… I'd willingly take twenty points away from Gryffindor."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was the opposite of what every Gryffindor should be. I was a jerk, heck I was a Slytherin."

Professor Lupin stood up from his desk and walked around to his son and put a hand on his shoulder. He couldn't have been more pleased at what his son had said. It was exactly what he wanted to hear.

"Remus," he said happily. "That was exactly what I needed to here. Now go find your sister."

* * *

As it turned out, once Remus walked past the giant hourglasses, no points had been taken from Gryffindor. His father didn't have the heart to take points, being so proud of what his son had said. Now he was on his way to find his sister, who was nowhere in sight. She wasn't in the common room. When Remus ran into Sirius, Sirius just said that she left him at the portrait of the Fat Lady, needing some breathing space. He checked the Great Hall, no sign of her.

It shouldn't have been this hard to find her, all the students were gone, and the castle was nearly empty. But she was nowhere in the castle, she wasn't anywhere on the grounds. He looked around the grounds towards the Forbidden Forest; she definitely didn't go in there. She knew better then to wander through the Forbidden Forest without an adult.

The violent swinging of the Whomping Willow suddenly caught his attention. Right then he realised that it had been silent the whole time he was out on the grounds. The only way for the Willow to be quiet was for the little knot on it to be pressed. Very few people knew that… and his sister just happened to be one of them. He knew where she was.

He sprinted towards the tree, dropping forward snatching the long stick lying on the ground. He doubled backwards as the Willow swung a mace like branch at him and swerved to his left and dove forward onto his stomach. Panting slightly, he prodded the knot and the Willow froze. Picking himself up, he walked over to the passageway under the trunk and slid down into a dark passageway. He pulled out his wand and muttered, "_Lumos_" illuminating the passageway. He didn't have a lot of time to find his sister… curfew was soon.

He ran down the passageway, knowing it well by now and able to avoid hitting his head on the door at the end. He walked through the door and immediately ran up the steps to the room where he had his transformation. He didn't know why she had chosen this place to hide out. She should have been terrified of it. He pushed the door open and entered the familiar room. He looked around, at first not seeing any one at all. Then something caught his attention in the corner.

"What do you want?" Rachael muttered, looking up and seeing her brother standing in the doorway.

"To talk," Remus answered truthfully.

"Now you want to talk? How about some yelling? I don't think you yelled enough before."

Remus flinched. He should have been expecting this. She wasn't going to forgive him easily. But he was ready with an apology, having been thinking up one since he went on his search to find her. He crossed the room and sat down in front of his sister, who immediately looked past him. She didn't understand why Remus was bothering. After all, he didn't bother to hear her out when she tried explaining.

"Listen, I'm really sorry," Remus said.

Rachael merely scoffed at him. She had no doubt in her mind that their dad, in some way, made him do this. "Sure you are," she retorted. "Did Dad make you do this?"

This was when Remus said possibly the stupidest thing he could have said.

"Dad said I needed to think of a punishment and-"

"AND THIS IS A PUNISHMENT?" his sister bellowed, jumping off her feet. "You're not even really sorry? This is just a stupid punishment?" She couldn't believe it. This was just a punishment? He wasn't _really_ sorry. He was just trying to get their dad off his back. She wasn't going to sit around and listen to false apologies. She shoved past her brother and made to leave the room, but her brother yanked the back of her cloak, preventing her from going any further.  
"Remus, I swear if you don't let me out-" she began.

"It's not a punishment!" Remus said. "Not anymore, at least."

He cautiously let go of his sister's cloak, hoping that she wasn't going to make a break to the castle. Rachael did consider taking this opportunity to run back up to the castle. But she didn't, if Remus really _was_ sorry… She backed away from the door and sat down on the four-poster bed, looking up at her brother.

"I shouldn't have yelled at you," said Remus sincerely. She looked at him, still disbelieving. How could it just go from being a punishment to be that he really meant it in a second? Remus sighed, why wouldn't she believe him? "I really mean it! I feel like such an idiot for not listening to you and Sirius and dad."

"Yeah, you should feel stupid," his sister shot back, still not listening to his apologies.

"Why won't you listen to me?" Remus said tiredly, he couldn't have made his point more clear than he already had. He felt stupid, he was sorry, but she still wasn't listening. "I said I was sorry, I mean it! I'm really sorry, I seriously am! I wouldn't be saying it if I wasn't."

Rachael wasn't going to listen to him at first. Her anger was still seething through her. But, as she looked at her brother, she could tell he meant every word he said. He was right, he wouldn't just say that he was sorry and not mean it….

"I'm sorry too," she confessed. "For putting you in that position."

"It's alright," Remus said, smiling a little. "So you're not mad?"

"No…"

"Good, let's go back up to the castle then?"

Rachael nodded and the Lupin twins made their way out of the shack and back up to the castle.


	33. Abuse of a Different Kind

Chapter Thirty Three  
Abuse Of A Different Kind

Mrs. Lupin sat down at the kitchen table in her house, looking at a rather large package that had just been delivered by a tawny owl with emerald green eyes. She had seen this owl before, and the last time she saw it should have been the last time. It was her daughter's owl. The last time she had seen it was when Rachael sent her a letter saying how Remus punched James. _How could she make up such lies?_ _Remus would NEVER punch someone_. Oh how wrong she was.

But as she eyed the package, determined not to open it, she found herself vaguely curious as to what might be inside. Still, she wasn't going to open it. She wasn't going to give her daughter the satisfaction of opening the package. After all, it could possibly be a rat she transfigured in Transfiguration class, if Professor McGonagall had taught them that already. But that wasn't in the second year curriculum, if she remembered correctly. She cautiously prodded the package as though she was afraid that it might jump up and attack her.

This was possibly the worst thing could happen on this day, December 27th, her birthday - a package from her daughter that was likely to attack her. Still… she had always been one to give in to her curiosity, which was pulsing at the moment. But no, why should she open it? _Oh I have to see anyway_. She tore the paper off and what she saw did not explode in her face.

Inside was a chocolate birthday cake with pink roses bordering around it and the words _Happy Birthday Mum_ written neatly across it in blue icing. Mrs. Lupin cautiously picked the cake up and discovered under it a note.

_Dear Mum,_

_This is just a little present for your birthday since I thought what I did might ruin it… looks like it didn't. Well, maybe this will. I hope it won't but you probably do._

_Happy birthday,_

_Rachael._

Mrs. Lupin read the letter several times before putting it down. She didn't understand. Why would her daughter bother to take the time to send her something for her birthday? Was it because of what Greg said? She didn't even want to consider the possibility that her husband was right. After all these years of saying how wrong he was, he couldn't be right. He just couldn't. From the letter, her daughter seemed to assume that she would blow up at her.

Well she wasn't going to at first; she was actually going to consider trying to talk to her, but not after what it said in that letter. How could her daughter be so assuming? Well for her being so assuming, she wasn't going to let it ruin her birthday. She was going to let it ruin her daughter's day. She smiled smugly to herself, _Greg was wrong_.

* * *

"I still can't believe you actually _sent_ something to _her_," said Sirius disgustedly as her tackled his Charms assignment.

It was the afternoon of Rachael and Remus's mother's birthday. Remus was sitting on the couch, drawing a picture, although he was supposed to be doing some homework. He didn't care though, since he knew he'd get it done eventually. Sirius was sitting at the table in front of the fire, working on his essay for Professor Flitwick and Rachael was on the foot of the stairs, not working or reading, just sitting, looking at the letter her mother had sent to her. She was silently debating about whether to open it or not.

Sirius and Remus were shocked to discover she had even sent her mother anything. She didn't deserve a present. Her mother only deserved a Howler, not a birthday cake from her disowned child.

"You should've gotten the house elves to poison it," Remus said bitterly, colouring in his drawing with some red ink. Sirius laughed at the thought of a sweet little house elf pouring poison into cake batter. Rachael smiled also. The thought was very tempting, but she knew she shouldn't be considering homicide.

"Yeah, seriously," Sirius agreed, setting his quill down and reading his completed essay. "So, are you ever going to open the letter?"

Rachael nodded; although she thought herself drinking poison would be a better option then this. She wasn't sure whether the present (which had been both a present and a peace offering) was going to make her mother turn around. Still, she was curious about what her mother had to say. So slowly she opened the letter, unfolded it and began to read.

"Assuming?" she muttered angrily to herself. "I'm assuming? What the heck does she expect me to be?"

Sirius and Remus looked at each other. Apparently Mrs. Lupin didn't like her present.

"Rachael, what?" Remus began, but his sister was fuming beyond belief.

"I'm not assuming!" she yelled at the letter, forgetting about Remus and Sirius for the moment. "And if I was, she can't blame me! I HATE that woman!" She ripped the letter in half, dropped it on the floor and dashed up the stairs.

Remus joined Sirius, who had just walked over to the stairs. They glanced at each other, flinching when they heard a door slam.

"Should we go talk to her?" Remus said, moving towards the stairs. Sirius was about to follow Remus, knowing that they had to say something. But as Remus stepped on the first step, the stairs disappeared and were replaced by a giant slide. Caught completely by surprise, the two fell backwards, Remus landing on Sirius, who groaned in pain.

"Remus," Sirius said in a muffled voice as Remus shoulder was against his mouth.

"Yeah?" Remus asked, trying not to laugh.

"Get off me!"

Remus gave a short laugh and stood up, holding out a hand to help his friend up. He rubbed his back and walked over to the slide, which was slowly turning back into stairs. "What was that about?" he wondered, looking over at Sirius.

Sirius shrugged and joined Remus at the steps, looking at them cautiously as though they might turn into a slide again. "Who knows?" he said. "Wanna try again?"

Remus gave Sirius a look as if to say 'yeah right'. He wasn't very keen on falling off the stairs again. But now they knew they couldn't go up to the girls' dormitory for some odd reason. They were just going to have to wait until she decided to come back downstairs. Remus resumed his drawing and Sirius sat at his usual seat in front of the fire. Remus picked up his drawing and began colouring it in again. He had been drawing a picture of a green dragon spitting roaring red fire; right now he was colouring in the outer flame of the fire. Remus loved drawing so when his dad asked him to illustrate some drawings of the topics he was discussing with his third year class Remus was only too quick to answer.

Sirius had tried his hand at drawing, but only found that he was able to draw faces and not too elaborate pictures of people. He didn't care though. Sirius had always said he was more of a writer than a drawer. Remus had to agree with this, the things Sirius came out with proved he had a mind for writing. He remembered, only too well, the story Sirius had concocted about dive-bombing the Slytherins with the Giant Squid.

"You know I could make such a great book about your mother Remus," Sirius said, looking up from the Chocolate Frog he was opening. He looked up dreamily as he mused over a title. "What do you think of this title? _The Chronicles of Psychosis: The Story of Mrs. Anna Lupin_."

Remus laughed. "Its good for a _start_," he critiqued. "But when you're proof reading it you might want to make it sound a bit eviler."

"How so, my friend?"

"I dunno… maybe _The Chronicles of an Axe Murderer_?"

Sirius laughed loudly. Then trying to sound as serious as possible said,

"Remus Lupin, you are a HORRIBLE child." Remus folded his arms across his chest and nodded heartily. "And you're proud of it?" Remus nodded again. "That's my boy!"

"I have a question," said Remus, looking as though he was restraining himself from laughing. Sirius inclined his head. "Why are we so pathetic?"

Sirius laughed and slapped his friend on the back.

"It's in our blood, mate!"

The boys decided to end their little insanity ramble for the day and continued with what they were doing. Remus was putting the finishing touches to his dragon drawing. Sirius, true to his word, began writing _The Chronicles of an Axe Murderer_. It must have been coming out really well because every few minutes he would burst out into fits of laughter. Remus placed his drawing on the arm of the couch and walked over to see what his friend was writing.

But once Remus tried to sneak a glance at his parchment, Sirius quickly moved to the side, blocking it out of view. Not deterred in the least by this, Remus simply moved to the other side. But his attempt was fruitless and the only reward he received was Sirius moving swiftly to that side, yet again blocking his writing out of sight. Groaning in annoyance, Remus stooped down and tried prying Sirius's arm off the table so he could see what he was writing.

But Sirius was too strong for Remus.

"Jeez, Remus," said Sirius exasperatedly. "Let me have some breathing space!"

"Hey, it's _my_ mother you're writing about," Remus countered. "I have a right to know what you're writing." Sirius shook his head vigorously, a smile playing on his lips as he tried his best to live up to his name. "I'll help you… I have lots of dirt on her!"

"I have lots of dirt too, you know," came a voice from the stairs. They looked up to see Rachael standing there, still clutching the letter she had been reading. Her face was red, but they knew she hadn't been crying, just very angry. "You can start with this." She walked over and dropped the crumpled piece of paper on the table in front of Sirius. Sirius looked up at her suspiciously, but she merely inclined her head. Shrugging he smoothed out the letter (which had been messily taped back together) and read it out loud.

_To whom it may concern,_

_If the only reason you sent me a present is to assume that I won't like it, then you were seriously wasting your time. I knew you were daft but I never thought you to be so assuming that I would do such a thing. Also, I have no idea what runs through your pathetic little mind but it must have possessed you to go to the Whomping Willow… Why didn't my son finish the job you started?_

"You know," said Rachael, in a would-be cheerful voice. "'To whom it may concern' is a pretty nice change from 'sorry excuse for a daughter,' isn't it?"

Remus and Sirius didn't know how to respond to that statement. She seemed to have made herself immune to the insults within the twenty minutes she was upstairs.

"What were you doing up there?" Sirius asked suddenly.

Rachael gave a short laughed and studied her fingernails as she spoke. "Oh you know, read the letter again, and wrote my own little letter. I was going to go owl it but I heard you two talking," she replied in an offhand voice.

"What'd it say?" Remus asked hesitantly.

"Nothing really… just that if I'm assuming then it's only because she's a nasty (she used a word here that neither of the boys had ever heard her use before) who disowns her own children and then she won't even say anything after they've nearly murdered themselves because of it. You know, the usual."

"Listen," said Remus cautiously. If his sister sent that letter, the one she received back was guaranteed to be unpleasant… Or maybe his mother wouldn't send just a letter. She could stoop as low as to send a Howler. He didn't want her getting a Howler. He knew his mother would've no hesitation in saying she was disowned. "I know you're angry but-"

"Oh, Remus, I am _way_ past angry," she snarled, suddenly losing her light and bouncy voice. She was now speaking in a furious growl that sent chills up their spines. "Right now I feel like whipping out my wand and using the Cruciatus Curse on her so many times that she'll be nothing more than a friggin' vegetable!"

"You shouldn't be talking like that…"

"Why shouldn't I? She's the one who disowned me! I didn't ask for it, I didn't know what happened!" She calmed down a little and stopped yelling. "Remus, I wanted to be her daughter again but… Sirius was right. Why should I waste my time trying to make her see reason? She's not worth it. As far as I'm concerned, my mother doesn't even exist anymore."

She took out the letter she had written, looked at it, and left the common room. She walked speedily down the corridor towards the Owlery, unconsciously rubbing one of the many cuts on her face. Honestly, her mother calling her daft? If anyone was daft it was Mrs. Anna Lupin. What mother could actually turn her back on her only daughter for something she had no control over? No mother would do that, except for Rachael's.

She didn't even know why she was bothering to send the letter; it would only result in a letter war. There would be no winner. The letters would just keep coming until one of them got sick of it. Right now Rachael was sick of everything. She had risked her life to earn her mother's love back. She had written so many letters… nothing helped. Her mother just wouldn't open her eyes to the facts. It was almost as if she were blind.

Rachael remembered vaguely about the first two weeks she had been in the orphanage. She had sent nearly thirty letters to her mother, who responded to each letter and each one of her letters was nastier than the next. She particularly remembered one that she had gotten and it was the letter that made her stop. It was so horrible, the things her mother had written. She never thought a woman could call herself a mother and then write something like that. She tried to permanently block it from her mind, but every now and then it would creep up on her, like it was right now.

She didn't like to think about it, but she couldn't help it. Those foul words and horrible wishes still echoed clearly in her mind and felt as though they were reverberating off the walls. The letter had been so horrible that she locked herself in the dormitory at the orphanage (also locking Becky out) for three days, refusing to eat or drink anything. Finally Mrs. Marshall had to remove the door from the room to get her out and gave her a good long lecture about locking doors, though she didn't even bother to ask _why_ Rachael had done it.

That was the thing with adults. They could yell at you for doing something, but they would never even bother to ask _why_ you had done what you did. Then on the occasions why they _did_ ask, they would pretend as though it wasn't a valid reason. What good were adults then for helping with problems? Rachael prayed with a passion that she didn't end up like that when she was a mother. But she didn't have to worry… with all the mental abuse she suffered as a child she needn't worry about those things.

She reached the Owlery and looked around for Emerald. She saw her owl resting peacefully in the rafters. She hated disturbing her owl when she was resting, but this letter was far too important.

"Emerald!" she yelled up into the rafters. Emerald opened one eye and hooted sleepily. "I need you to mail this quickly." Emerald, rather reluctantly, flew down to Rachael and waited patiently for her to tie the letter to her leg.

* * *

Rachael sat in the empty common room, staring lazily into the crackling fire. Dinner was going on the in the Great Hall right now, but she wasn't too hungry so she declined the offer of going down with Sirius and Remus. She had mailed the letter to her mother and she had no doubt that it had already reached her. So all she could do was to wait for a letter in response.

But what she got wasn't the type of response she had been expecting. Her mother didn't send her a punishment in letterform… she sent it in person. As Rachael was gazing into the fire she noticed something fall out of it. Taken completely by surprise, she hopped up onto the couch to avoid it. Getting over the initial shock, Rachael was able to peer over at what had come out of the fire. What she saw made her stomach nearly drop out of her body.

"M-Mum?" she stuttered. Why had her mother Flooed to Hogwarts?

"Yes Mum!" she snapped, standing up, a look of fury in her eyes. "I have a question for you!" Rachael was too afraid to reply, but she didn't have to. She received a sharp strike across her face and a loud yell. "Why," was followed by another slap, "did," was followed by a kick, "you," punch, "send that," another slap, "to," kick, "me?" She received another sharp punch in the face. But as this went on Rachael didn't flinch once, she was too shocked to do so.

She never expected her mother to resort to PHYSICAL abuse… just mental abuse. Now that it was happening, she was too shocked to feel the pain that was coursing through her like venom. She looked up at her mother, frightened to say anything, thinking that if she did she might get hit again.

"How dare you say such things to me?" she yelled, taking the opportunity to strike her daughter again.

"I-I," Rachael stammered. If she answered with the truth she was likely to be killed. Why did she have to be the only one in Gryffindor Tower…?

"You what?"

"I told you the truth!" Rachael yelled, finally feeling the pain from her beating. But she didn't care about the pain; she just wanted her mother to hear this. "Everything I told you was the truth! It's not my fault you can't handle the truth! I didn't do anything! I'm not the daft person here! You are!"

That was a mistake on Rachael's part.

What followed after her outburst is far too gruesome to describe. She received the most unreal beating of her life; her mother was relentlessly beating her. Rachael didn't protest to it. She knew it would be useless, that her mother wouldn't listen to her. Besides… she couldn't even get the words out without vomiting. She just waited for someone to come up to the tower or for her mother to get tired. But it didn't seem to be coming anytime soon.

Three minutes later her prayers, though, were answered when the portrait hole swung open and she heard a very terrified Remus yell,

"MUM! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Remus ran over, closely followed by Sirius, and yanked his mother backwards, tying her arms around her back. Sirius walked over to Rachael and attempted to help her up, only to have her moan for him to go away.

"Oh, Merlin…" Remus whispered when he saw his sister. "Sirius, get my dad." Sirius nodded and began to leave. "Then hurry and get Madam Pomfrey." Sirius didn't need telling twice; he rushed out of the common room as fast as his legs could carry him. Remus had to sit and wait now with his mother, whom he was afraid to let go of. If he did… she could lash out at him as well as his sister. So he took this moment to tie her up magically, having learned the spell from a run-in with Snape.

He kept a firm grip on his mother's arm, just in case she was able to break free of her bonds. He looked down at his sister, who was obviously struggling to remain conscious. He wanted to go over and comfort her, but he was afraid to let go of his mother. What had possessed her to do that? What could Rachael have possibly said to make her blow up like this? The mental abuse was enough! But this… this was the limit… something was going to have to be done.

"Sirius, what?" The portrait door swung open and Sirius clambered in, followed by two very bewildered staff members: Professor Lupin and Madam Pomfrey. Professor Lupin looked up to see Remus and –

"Anna?" he shouted, shocked to see his wife in bonds and being closely guarded by their son. "What are you - Merlin! What have you done?"

"Oh dear," murmured Madam Pomfrey, and she immediately got to work. She whipped her wand out and tried very vigilantly to move Rachael around and see where her various wounds were.

"No," Rachael whimpered. "Stop, it hurts…."

Madam Pomfrey frowned sympathetically, but continued on her work. "It's alright, dear," she whispered comfortingly. "No one's going to hurt you anymore."

Professor Lupin just stood there, utterly shocked. He blinked several times, as though if he did that enough then his mind might be rid of the horrible scene before him. It wasn't true… it couldn't be… this wasn't happening. She hardly recovered from Christmas! How could his wife do this? Why? That was all that was going through his mind… he refused to believe this. His wife couldn't have done this! How had his family turned out this way?

"Dad," Remus whispered. "Aren't you going to say something?"

"What's there to say?" Professor Lupin chocked, fighting to keep back his tears that were threatening to burst. "My wife is mad. My daughter's mentally and physically abused. My son's a werewolf… There's no hope for this family." He walked over to his wife, glared her in the eye before whispering in a menacing voice, "Go to hell woman before the Dementors get you," and he shoved her in the emerald green fire and yelled the address of his old home.

Sirius and Remus looked at each other. They didn't know what to say. They merely watched as Professor Lupin sunk down into his seat and buried his face in his hands.

"Dad?" said Remus slowly. But his father didn't respond, he just began crying all his despair. Every bad thought that had been held within him was flooding out through tears. Remus winced as he watched this and sat down and squeezed his dad's shoulder. "Dad… Dad, it's okay."

"No it's not, Remus," he whispered through his tears. "It's not okay. Your sister's hurt, you're a werewolf; your mother is a madman… What happened to our family?"

Remus wanted to know that as well, but he couldn't think about it with everything that had unfolded in the past few minutes. He looked down as Madam Pomfrey did her best to mend Rachael, but it was useless. There were simply too many wounds for her to heal in one night.

"Does it feel any better?" Madam Pomfrey asked her patient soothingly. Rachael didn't say anything, she merely whimpered, still afraid to open her mouth. "I just can't believe this… With all respect, Professor, your wife is out of her mind. Honestly, beating up an innocent girl. What reason could she have to do that?"

"It was the letter," Rachael groaned, her voice full of pain. Her eyes darted to Remus and Sirius when she said that and they immediately knew what she meant. "I sent it…"

"I told you not to," said Remus.

"I know…"

"I know. You didn't know this would happen… I can't blame you."

Madam Pomfrey stood up and looked at the weeping professor. "I've done everything I can for now…" she said. "I don't think she needs to go to the Hospital Wing. I'll bring her up to the dormitory and check on her in the morning. It'll be peaceful enough in there."

Professor Lupin nodded and muttered the incantation, handed his wand to Madam Pomfrey and watched as she brought his daughter up to the dormitory. "I've got to go inform Dumbledore about this," Professor Lupin said. "Good night, boys."


	34. There's No Bright Side

Chapter Thirty Four  
There's No Bright Side

"Dumbledore took the spell on the stairs off for us. Take advantage of it, Sirius!"

"How do you know he really did? He could've lied."

"Why would he lie when the situation is like this? Come on, Sirius."

"If you're so sure then you go up first."

"Fine I will." Remus marched determinedly up the stairs leading to the girls' dormitory and waited for Sirius to come follow him. Professor Dumbledore had lifted the privacy curse just for the boys so they could visit Rachael as she recovered. When Professor Lupin had told Professor Dumbledore about what had happened, Dumbledore was infuriated. He placed a special charm over the Gryffindor fire and then personally saw to it that the authorities would take care of Mrs. Lupin.

No one had ever seen Dumbledore so upset. But to have something like this happen in his school, it made him beside himself with anger.

"Told you he took off the spell," said Remus smugly as they stood in front of the dormitory door. Sirius just glared at him and pushed him into the room. They saw Rachael lying on her bed and for the first time were able to take in her injuries. Her eyes were swollen and bloodshot; her lip was bruised and had dried blood smeared all over it. Her hair was a little uneven (they had no doubt that Mrs. Lupin went as low as hair pulling) and that was only her face. They didn't want to imagine the injuries on her body where he clothes covered.

"How'd you get up here?" she asked sleepily, having noticed the boys' presence. As she spoke it seemed as though every word was costing her a terrible price.

"Dumbledore lifted the spell for us," Remus explained, walking over to his sister's bedside. "How are you?"

"A giant bruise," she answered miserably. "I've got bruises all over my face, my arms, my stomach," she inhaled deeply, wincing. "And I think my ribs are broken… Madam Pomfrey must've missed them."

"Rachael," said Sirius. "What was in that letter?" He knew it was the letter that had sparked the reaction. But was it so bad to beat her?

"Nothing bad enough for her to do _this_ to me," Rachael replied. "I just said I wasn't stupid, and assuming like she was. And well… I told her that if she wanted me dead she was going to hell before I do."

Remus and Sirius looked at each other. That was a mistake for her to say. But it wasn't that bad. It was the truth after all.

"Rachael," Sirius said. "You're not going to hell… Your mother is, not you."

"But-"

"_She_ is, not you," he interjected firmly and sincerely.

* * *

Rachael remained bedridden for the remainder of the Christmas break. Madam Pomfrey would appear in Gryffindor Tower every day to go and check on her. Sirius and Remus would wait patiently for her to come back down and give them her daily report. Each day it was the same thing, "she's recovering… just a few more days." And so it went on for the rest of the break.

Remus and Sirius spent most of their time over the next week or so playing chess, Exploding Snap, and just doing whatever popped into their head. They soon learned it was a mistake to do whatever popped into Sirius's head. Sirius decided to do something called Snape Hunting, having heard about a Muggle sport called Fox Hunting. He led Remus out on a trek through the castle to find their prey.

They saw Snape coming out of the dungeons and heading towards the Great Hall for lunch. Normally, Sirius would have hexed him; taking advantage of the magic he'd been granted. But no, he had to resort to an old Muggle prank. He snuck into the kitchens beforehand and asked them for some balloons. The house elves always had balloons for the end of the year feast, and they were only too quick to oblige.

So they were standing over the banister on the floor above their enemy, Sirius with the water balloon held firmly over his head, aiming carefully. Just as Snape walked out from under the arch, Sirius let the balloon drop and he and Remus quickly fled the scene. However, Snape knew perfectly well who had dropped the balloon on him. So he searched out Sirius and Remus and found them a few hours later when they were having a snowball fight on the grounds.

He had his own, equally larger, water balloons and chucked them at the two boys, who were drenched from head to toe. Taken completely by surprise, neither had time to react, so Snape got away. Now soaking wet and out in twenty-degree weather, the boys retreated to the castle. After that incident the boys knew that Muggle pranks weren't going to work on Snape. Besides, it wasn't any fun to prank him when the castle was empty; there was no place to hide. So the boys had to wait until the castle filled up again once the break was over.

* * *

The castle did fill back up eventually. The day before classes resumed all the students who had went home returned to Hogwarts. Remus and Sirius ran to meet James and Peter as they entered the common room. James and Peter were happy to see their friends and eagerly told them all about their Christmases. Though when they asked how Remus and Sirius spent their Christmas, they merely said that it was a quiet one.

"Hey, where's your sister?" James asked Remus. "I wanted to see if she got that model Quidditch player I sent."

Remus quickly looked up at the staircase. "Yeah, she got it… but she's… err… she's sleeping right now," he lied.

James nodded and continued telling Remus and Sirius about how his dad had slipped into their cake on Christmas Day. The story was quite amusing. James had accidentally, or as he put it, left a blob of dough on the floor when he was helping his mum cook, and he never cleaned it up. His father did however. His shoe wiped it right off the floor when he slipped on it. Sirius had no doubt in his mind that James didn't 'accidentally' leave the dough there. He knew his father could take a joke.

* * *

"Rachael, how was your Christmas? I see you did something new with your hair." Lily had just appeared in the dormitory to see her friend sitting up in her bed with her knees drawn up against her chest.

"Yeah, uh… I did." Rachael answered dully. She had been forced to wear her hair in a ponytail so she could hide the fact that it was uneven due to her mother's aggressive hair pulling. "How was your Christmas?"

Lily walked over and sat at the foot of the bed, prepared to tell her friend what her sister, Petunia, and her boyfriend Vernon did that was absolutely hysterical. But she forgot about the minute she got close enough to her friend.

"What happened to you?" she asked bewilderedly.

Rachael still hadn't recovered from her venture to the Whomping Willow, nor had she recovered from the beating her mother had inflicted on her. Her eyes were still a little swollen, her lip was black and blue and she had scrapes all over her face. Her ribs were still sore, which was why she was leaning against the headboard, for support so she didn't hurt herself.

"Nothing," she said, hoping Lily wouldn't press her on the subject. "I'm fine. Really, I'm okay."

Lily frowned. "No you're not, tell me what happened!"

Rachael flinched slightly at her friend's raised voice. She didn't want to tell. If she told her why it would reveal her being sent to an orphanage and it could also reveal Remus being a werewolf. Neither of those things did Rachael want Lily to know. But as she looked up at Lily… she could tell Lily was truly worried. She was concerned; she wanted to know what happened. And Lily was her best friend after all… how could she keep this from her?

She would just have to tell her. She could do it without revealing Remus's identity. She'd just have to do some quick thinking.

"Lily," she said quietly. "I love you like the sister I never had… you deserve to know." Lily inclined her head to listen. "You see, the thing is, I'm not one of my mother's most favourite people… Me and her, we haven't been getting along for five years."

"Your mother? I don't get it."

"My mother disowned me five years ago and I never forgave her, she never forgave me… She loved Remus, not me. I was just the other kid in the house. So on her birthday a few weeks ago, I sent her a present as a sort of peace offering. She took the letter I sent with it the wrong way and she sent a really nasty one back. I got mad and sent her an even nastier one. She was really mad; she Flooed here and sort of… sort of took her anger out on me."

"Your _mother_ did this to you? What did your dad do about it?"

"He and Dumbledore have got the authorities on her… She's supposed to be sent to Azkaban for a year. That'll only make things worse for me though…"

"But I don't understand. How could your mother just disown you?"

"Because of what I did!" Rachael yelled hysterically. "It's all because of what I did…"

The corner of Lily's mouth twitched. She didn't know what to say. How could she know what to say? She had never known about any of this and it was quite clear her friend didn't want her to know. She suddenly wished she hadn't asked. Rachael's mother did this, her mother! She had met her mother at the platform before. She seemed like a nice woman. But for her to do this, what kind of mother would hurt their child in such a way?

"But what did you do?" Lily asked softly.

"I can't tell you," Rachael whispered.

"Surely it's not that bad that you can't tell your friend?" She blanched when Rachael began nodding her head.

"It is… I've been saying it wasn't my fault for ages, but it is my fault. I ruined his life!"

"Whose life?"

"I ruined Remus's life…"

Lily didn't ask any further questions. It was clear she had just stepped into an area in her friend's life that was off limits to her. She didn't like to even think of what she could have done. But she had no doubt in her mind that whatever Rachael said she'd done, it wasn't her fault. Lily stood up and walked over to her four-poster bed, suddenly she felt sick to her stomach.

"Are you going to be able to go to class tomorrow?" she asked as she removed her cloak and began folding it.

"Yeah, McGonagall said I'm well enough."

Lily nodded and managed a small smile. Lily thought she would never feel so sorry for someone. Not even when she was in the fifth grade and saw this group of boys in her grade tormenting a poor little first grader. She thought that then would be the only time she had felt so sorry for someone. She never thought that it would be her best friend she would feel bad for. _What a horrible woman_, Lily thought angrily as she pulled the curtains around her bed so she could change. _If I had to chose between living with Petunia or that woman… I'd pick Petunia in a second_.

Lily had to admit, she thought her relationship with Petunia was horrible. But at least she and her mother got along. She remembered at the end of their first year when Lily suggested getting together over the summer. She hadn't noticed the sadness in her friend's voice when she said it wasn't a good idea, now she knew why. Rachael felt like she was imposing if she said that she, Lily, couldn't go to her house. Lily very much doubted she would like the visit her friend in an orphanage.

Lily always knew the world wasn't a nice place, that there was always going to be some problem. Someone was always going to be discriminated against; there would always be someone who would stereotype another. But she never thought in a million years she would ever meet someone who suffered from one of these problems. She never expected to meet someone with a life like that. Now that she had met this person, she didn't know what to think.

She knew one thing though, she wasn't going to treat her friend any differently then she always did. That was probably one of the reasons Rachael never told her, she didn't want anyone to feel bad for her. Lily couldn't blame her. She wouldn't want anyone to feel bad for her either and treat her different. She would never do that to her friend. Things would still be the same with them, like nothing had changed.

* * *

Class began the next day and the entire castle was one large groan. None of the students wanted to resume their dreadful classes. After having a three-week break it was like a form of cruel and unusual torture. In fact, it _was_ cruel and unusual torture. They had to do so much work it was almost as though they hadn't been in school for a year rather than for three weeks.

Professor McGonagall had them transfiguring everything in sight. Professor Flitwick was doing an extensive review of all of their spells. Professor Sprout was making them work extra hard on caring for the Mandrakes. And so it went with every class, until they got to Defence Against the Dark Arts, that is.

Class started out as it usually did. Professor Lupin would take role call and then would explain their lesson. But they all noticed the professor, who was usually so full of life, seemed rather detached and ghost-like to the class. When he spoke, it was with a hollow, distant voice, as though he was Professor Binns. Luckily he was a tad more interesting than the History of Magic professor.

"Can anyone tell me how to ward off a vampire?" Professor Lupin asked his class in his hollow voice. Rachael raised her hand in the air and waited patiently for her father to call on her, as she was the only one willing to answer. But her father merely scanned the classroom, as though hoping someone else would answer. When no one did, he called on his daughter.

"You can ward off a vampire with garlic or with a cross," she answered promptly, though looking a bit disconcerted when her father awarded three points to Gryffindor. Why was he acting like this to her? She shook her head and resumed her work.

Defence Against the Dark Arts was the last class of the day, so all of the Gryffindors were eager to get out of there. Once the bells sounded they packed up and ran out of the room. Rachael shouldered her book bag and waited patiently for Lily to come out of the classroom.

As she waited, Rachael couldn't help but notice she was attracting stares from her fellow students. She wished they wouldn't do that. She didn't look as beat up as she did three weeks ago. Though it was still noticeable, that wasn't any reason for them to stare at her. She wondered what was taking Lily so much time to gather her books. Readjusting the strap on her book bag, she went back into the classroom to see that Lily's bag had split in two and she was collecting her books again.

"Need help?" she offered, stooping down next to Lily and picking up her friend's Transfiguration book.

Lily took it gratefully and placed it on her desk. "Thanks," she said, picking up her Charms book and stacking it on top of her Transfiguration book.

"How'd your bag break?"

"Potter."

"James? Well, you know he only does this stuff because he likes you…"

Lily gagged in horror at the thought. Rachael had no doubt in her mind that Lily was dreading the thought of James being in love with her. Well, Lily did have a right to fear it; James could be a little overbearing when he wanted. Still, it was mean of him to break Lily's book bag.

"You two might want to hurry up, or else there'll be no food left in the Great Hall," came Professor Lupin's voice from his desk.

The girls muttered a response and, after repairing Lily's bag with a nifty spell, they high-tailed it to the Great Hall. They walked into the Great Hall and located two empty seats at the end of the table closest to the Staff Table. They deposited their bags under the table and began loading their plates.

"So," said Lily, looking around the room. "What was with your dad today?"

Rachael shrugged. In truth,_ she_ didn't even know what was with her dad. He had been acting oddly all through class.

"I dunno," she admitted. "Maybe he's still upset over… well, you know." Lily nodded automatically. "Then again, who can blame him? Sometimes I wonder what possessed him to marry my mother."

"Well I imagine she used to be nice… I mean, she hasn't always been like that, has she?"

"Well, she was always a little harsh with me, but she did love me… I guess the accident was what finally broke her. Crazy as it sounds, she _used_ to be nice. Right now she's like a teacher who plays favourites."

"At a more extreme level," Lily added. "I still find it hard to believe you did anything worth being sent to an orphanage for."

"You wouldn't understand…." Rachael looked up from her plate of macaroni and glanced around at the Slytherin table, to see them all staring at her as she turned. What were they staring at her for? Why was everyone staring? No one knew what happened. The only people who did were her, Professor Lupin, Dumbledore, Madam Pomfrey, Sirius, Remus, James, Peter and Lily. What was everyone else playing at?

Her answer to that question, however, was brought to her almost immediately, and by one of her least favourite people in the world. Snape got up from the Slytherin table and made his way over to them.

"Hullo there, Lupin," he said slyly.

Lily and Rachael groaned simultaneously. Lily didn't hate Snape as much as her friend. But it was still a pain to have him around, especially on a day like this.

"Hullo there, _Snape_," Rachael replied, just as slyly. "What do you want?"

"Can't a person just come over to say hullo?"

Lily and Rachael exchanged glances, both thinking the same thing.

"If the person is you, Snape?" Lily said. "Then no."

Snape sneered. "I just came over to say that everyone's staring because it's common knowledge now that Lupin here can't stand up to her mother."

Rachael rolled her eyes. That was about as low as Snape could go.

"Right, Snape," she said conversationally, not even daring to ask how the word leaked out. "I _really_ want to waste my time hurting a forty-three-year-old woman. I'm not you, in case you haven't noticed."

Lily had to choke back a laugh by turning it into a rather obvious cough.

"Shut up, Mudblood," Snape spat at Lily, who merely sneered as she refused to be dissuaded by such an insult. "Not even going to use _magic_? I thought you would've at least had the decency to take your mother down with MAGIC!"

"Oi, Snape!" came another voice.

The three turned around to see Remus, James, Sirius and Peter approaching them. Rachael and Lily knew it was Sirius who had spoken; it was his trademark greeting for Snape. Snape glare at Sirius for a mere moment before turning his attention back to the girls.

"I am ashamed… especially coming from someone who's not afraid to duel," Snape mocked.

"Snape, has your life become so miserable that you've been reduced to mocking girls?" Sirius questioned with an air of sarcasm.

"No, Black. I was merely stating how pathetic it is that –"

"Shut up, Snape!" Remus yelled suddenly.

The six heads snapped towards Remus, who was now holding his wand out and fuming madly. Snape merely sneered. He doubted Remus would really have the nerve to take him on. But Snape didn't know how Remus had been feeling the past few weeks. Snape didn't know that, despite how Remus acted around his friends, he felt as though his world was collapsing around him. He couldn't take everything that was happening to his family.

He had bottled up his anger far too long and now was as good a time as any to release it.

"You have the nerve to take me on, Lupin?" Snape retorted daringly.

"I've had the nerve for a long time," Remus whispered menacingly.

James nudged Remus in the back as a way of telling him he should quit while he was ahead. Remus wasn't listening, though. Snape had gone too far, he was asking for it. Snape smiled maliciously at hearing that, this wasn't anything but a joke to him. He gave a short laugh and slowly pulled out his own wand, as though he was pulling a gun from his belt.

"Remus," Rachael said slowly, she didn't want her brother to get into a duel on account of her.

"No," Remus shot back. He knew what she was going to say. "He has no right to say that!"

"But, Remus, he's –"

She was too late to stop him. Remus fired a curse at Snape, who quickly dodged it, causing Rachael and Lily to run out of the way. Now seething with rage, Snape waved his wand and sent a curse back at Remus, who also averted it, making the three boys run into the Ravenclaw table to avoid it. On it went, firing curses and dodging them. Now the whole hall was watching them and there wasn't a professor in the room to stop them.

All of the students were now crowded around the two duelers, looking for some action, which really meant for someone to get hurt. However, it wasn't going to happen, both Remus and Snape were too good of duelers to harm each other. They dodged every curse thrown and sent back even more powerful hexes.

"Remus," said Sirius warningly. "Not that I don't appreciate you trying to massacre Snape, but you're going to get yourself in trouble!"

"Yeah, Lupin," Snape mocked. "Don't want to get hurt do you? Well, maybe you can take the pain a little better than your sister can…"

"That's it!" Remus yelled, flinging his wand down on the floor and lunging at Snape. He didn't need his wand; all he needed was his fists. He just wanted to pound Snape to dust. Snape, taken completely by surprise, hadn't the time to react and ended up getting punched in the nose. Ignoring the stinging pain in his nose and the blood dripping from it, Snape used all of his strength to turn the fight around. He flipped Remus over onto his back and gave him a hard punch in the stomach, knocking the wind out of him.

Enraged, Remus hopped up onto his knees and pushed Snape over onto the floor and kicked him.

"Remus!" James yelled. "Leave him alone!"

"You're defending _Snape_?" Remus yelled, only to be hit in the back as he turned to look at James.

"No! But you're gonna get hurt and in trouble!" James said in defence.

Again Remus didn't answer, he went on fighting Snape. Sirius looked over at James and James immediately knew what Sirius was thinking, they had better stop this before it got any worse. James stooped down on the left side of Remus and Sirius on the right and they grabbed his arms and yanked him up.

They stumbled backwards slightly and tightened their grip on Remus's arms, thinking that if they let go for a minute that he would lunge at Snape again. Snape on the other hand, got up, dusted himself off and walked away as though nothing happened. Rachael and Lily exchanged glances. Both were clearly shocked at what had just taken place before them. Not only had they never seen Remus start a duel, they had never seen him resort to Muggle violence. As a matter of fact, Remus _never_ resorted to violence.

"Remus," said James slowly. "What just happened?"

Remus shook his head as he walked through the dispatching crowd of students. He sat down at the table and placed his head in his hands.

"I don't know," he said quietly. "I just lost it."

James sat down next to Remus.

"Obviously," James replied, trying to make light of the whole event. Sirius, however, threw James a look that said this wasn't a joke. "You're just lucky none of the professors were in here," James said quickly, as though trying to make Remus feel bad. Remus didn't need James to make him feel bad, though. He felt stupid enough just thinking about what he had done.

"Come on," said Sirius, getting up from his place at the table. "Let's go up to Madam Pomfrey so she can fix you up." He began to leave the hall with Remus following slowly behind him. Remus was grateful that he didn't have too many bruises. He could just lie and say he fell down the stairs. James and Peter stood up and followed the two out of the hall, both looking utterly shocked. Now there was only Rachael and Lily.

"Has your brother ever done that before?" asked Lily in an almost awed voice.

"No," Rachael answered bitterly. Remus had never lashed out like that before, no matter what the situation. He knew better than to resort to violence. He was practically the male version of their mother. She stood up, muttering to Lily she needed to go do something, and made her way out of the hall to the Hospital Wing. She desperately needed to talk to Remus about this. She was afraid of what she had just witnessed.

She trudged through the Entrance Hall and up the stairs, wondering if Remus had already faced the wrath of Madam Pomfrey. Rachael had to admit that she admired the witch. She had to put up with a lot between her and her brother, and then with the rest of the school as well. If it wasn't for Madam Pomfrey, Rachael wouldn't be as well as she was. Though her sides still ached and her face show clear signs of abuse… Madam Pomfrey had done her job.

She walked slowly up to the third floor, and listened for any signs of shouting. But as she strained her ears she recognised that all was silent within the halls. _Maybe Madam Pomfrey went easy on him?_ It was highly unlikely that she did any of the sorts. But she did have a soft spot for Remus.

She finally made it to the Wing and pushed the door open to find Remus sitting up on one of the beds, nursing his bruised arm. He looked up when his sister came in and smiled weakly.

"I can't say you didn't deserve it," Rachael said fairly, taking a seat across from Remus.

He grimaced as she said that. She was right but he didn't like to be wrong when Snape was right. Though he thought Snape was just as wrong as he was. "You can't say Snape _didn't_ deserve what he got?" Remus countered.

"Well, I _can_ say he didn't deserve the Muggle punishment. Maybe he didn't even deserve the magic either."

"You honestly think Snape didn't deserve that – why are you nodding?"

"Because he didn't deserve it – yes he was being a jerk – but he's always acting like a jerk. That's not a reason to abuse him like that."

"I don't get it. How can you say he didn't deserve that? He was practically begging."

"Remus, you're missing the point completely! Don't you realise what you just did? You did what Mum did to me!"

"This is different! Snape was insulting you so badly. You wanted me to take that lying down?"

"Remus, it's not different. It's the same thing. Mum insulted me and I didn't take it lying down and look what happened. As for you taking it, this wasn't your battle, it was mine." Remus didn't say anything; he merely studied his sister and what she had said. "You know it's true, Remus."

Remus nodded slowly. "You're right. I don't know why I did what I did…. I just lost it." He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "It was just that listening to Snape saying all those things, he wasn't there. He didn't know what really happened."

"So then if he didn't know what really happened, why'd you care so much?"

Remus gave a frustrated sighed and threw his hands down. "Because I really can't take this anymore! What happened three weeks ago was the breaking point. I've had to sit here and watch our family fall apart like this and I've said nothing and done nothing about it. I should have, but I didn't. I should have told Mum that she was out of her mind, but I was afraid to. I should have tried to convince her that you were innocent, but I didn't! I didn't do anything and look what happened."

"Remus…" said Rachael, her voice softening sympathetically.

"I could've said something!" he growled in frustration, not listening to his sister.

"You did say something. Mum just didn't listen."

"I didn't try hard enough! I'm your brother; I'm supposed to help you."

Rachael sighed heavily. She was at a loss for words. What could she say? He was blaming the entire events of five years ago and three weeks ago on himself. He knew it wasn't his fault, and yet he couldn't help but blame himself. He was always told that the brother was supposed to protect the sister, and if that philosophy was true… than he had failed dismally.

"There're some things you just can't help, Remus," said Rachael comfortingly. "You did try, you did your best. You told the truth and that was the best you could do."

"I guess this is how you feel most of the time?" She smiled weakly and nodded. "How do you stand it?"

* * *

It was a while before Remus was calm enough for his sister to leave. But by the time she was able to, Remus was ready to go back up to Gryffindor Tower, although he received a lengthy lecture from Madam Pomfrey before he left. His idea of telling her he fell down the stairs didn't work as well as he had hoped. She was absolutely disgusted with Remus's behaviour and warned him that if he went fighting again she wouldn't heal his wounds. Though he knew perfectly well that she didn't have the authority to do so, he was still frightened by the statement.

They trudged down the hallway; not speaking to each other, as neither of them had anything to say anyway. They wanted to catch up with James, Sirius, Peter and Lily so the first place to look was to common room. Rachael was busy trying to figure out how the entire school learned of her painful punishment. No one was in Gryffindor Tower that night that could have said anything. It was only her, her mother, Sirius, Remus, Professor Lupin and Madam Pomfrey. She highly doubted that any of them, save for her mother, would've said anything.

Her mother… could her mother have possibly said something to someone? Her mother certainly had to mind to do that, it could serve as another chapter in making her daughter's life living hell. It made enough sense, though it was near impossible that she did do it. Her mother was being tracked down by the authorities and likely to be thrown to the Dementors. She wouldn't go around advertising the crime she'd committed. But then if her mother hadn't said anything, why did everyone know?

She figured it was just a rumor, which happened to be true, and started the day they got back to school. After all, she did look beat up, but then why would everyone automatically know that it was her mother who had done it?

"Can you two come here for a minute?" came a voice from behind Remus and Rachael. They spun around and saw their dad poking his head out of his classroom. Curious as to what he wanted, they followed him into the room. "Sit down; I'll be with you in a second." Doing as they were told, the two sat down and waited patiently for their father to speak with him.

"I've got something to tell you two," said Professor Lupin as he took a seat at his desk. "I've been offered another job." Remus and Rachael looked at each other. That would mean he had to leave Hogwarts. "The job's in America…"

"America?" Remus said, completely shocked. "You're going to go to America?"

"It's not forever, Remus," he said, hoping this would make them feel better. But it did anything but that. "With your mother in Azkaban, there's no way I could raise you both on the money I make as a teacher. This job they're offering me pays a good salary. I have to make enough so that when I come back I'll be able to raise you for a good long time."

"So you're just going to leave?" Remus said angrily. "Where are _we_ supposed to go?"

"I've worked it out with Dumbledore, you two will stay here during the holidays. Look at the bright side," he said turning to his daughter, who was glaring daggers at him. "You won't have to go back to the orphanage."

"I have a question," she said quietly. "Is leaving the country a way for you to escape all that's happened? So you won't have to think about what that woman's done to our family?"

"What? No of course not, it's just-"

"Because that's not the way out, and I don't care if I have to go back to the orphanage, it was better knowing you were still around."

"I'm sorry. It's just something I have to do."

"Abandoning your children is something you have to do?" Remus snarled as he got up and left the room, his sister following him.


	35. What to Say?

Chapter Thirty Five  
What to Say?

It was only a day before their father would leave them. They couldn't understand why he had to leave so soon, but they were still too angry to ask. During class the next day, Professor Lupin avoided his children's eyes, and they avoided his. The class could sense that something was wrong just by the way Professor Lupin conducted his class. He talked in a harsh and tense voice, often snapping when the simplest question was asked, and then apologising lazily when he realised he had startled his students.

Remus and Rachael weren't acting much different from their father, though they didn't snap at anyone. They just sat in their seats, staring determinedly at the wall across from them, trying to act as though their father wasn't in the room. They still refused to believe that in just a few hours their father would be leaving the country. They would have no idea as to when he would be returning. The bell finally rang, signaling the end of classes for the day and the twins began packing up their books, hoping to get out of the room as quickly as possible. However when they tried to escape, their father called them up to his desk.

They hesitated for a moment; they could pretend they hadn't heard him. But they didn't want to be mean, and reluctantly went to see what the professor wanted. He didn't gesture for them to sit down. He merely leaned on his desk and studied them for a moment before speaking.

"I don't want to leave with us on bad terms," he said slowly. He needed to reconcile with his children before he was able to leave. He couldn't have them mad at him until he got back, whenever that would be. Remus and Rachael nodded, not really agreeing, however. "You realise I'm only doing this for the good of our family. If we didn't need the money I would never leave you."

"But can't you get a job somewhere here?" Remus asked, almost pleading. "Muggle jobs pay well!"

Professor Lupin couldn't help but smile. His son was right of course. Muggle jobs did offer a considerable salary. He just couldn't bear the thought of not being able to use magic.

"Remus, if you were in my position would you really want a Muggle job?" Remus thought for a moment, almost answering affirmatively. But he knew this wasn't a time to joke and therefore shook his head negatively. "That's what I thought. I have to leave tonight in order to be there by tomorrow. I don't want to leave with you two still mad at me."

Remus and Rachael nodded fairly. They didn't want to be mad at their father either. Even still, they couldn't help but feel angry at him. It wasn't as strong a feeling as it was at the beginning, but it was still strong. They just couldn't grasp the fact that in a few hours time their father would be leaving them, and they wouldn't know when he was coming back.

Professor Lupin looked down at them, a hint of pleading in his eyes as he asked for his children's forgiveness. Neither of them knew what to say. They just knew they weren't ready to say anything at all. Shaking their heads sadly, they rose from their seats and left the room, leaving Professor Lupin watching them, but not thinking that this was a hopeless case.

He sighed and began packing up his books and belongings, hoping that his children would come around to say goodbye by the time he left. And even if they didn't come to him, he knew they had forgiven him… and that was all he needed.

* * *

Rachael sat in the common room waiting for Remus to come down from the dormitory. He had gone up there to do some of his homework, finding the noise of the common room too distracting. However, she doubted that was his real reason for not wanting to be in the common room, as there was hardly anyone in there at all except for a few third years and herself. He was thinking about their dad and whenever he did that he found everything distracting. But she played along with him and said she'd wait for him to come down before she went to dinner.

The two hadn't decided if they wanted to go see their dad before he left. They knew it was right for them to and it would make him feel better. They were just confused about everything. They really did forgive their dad. They just didn't want to forgive him because it would make everything final. He would really be leaving. It would also mean for Rachael that she would never have a parent around for her. Remus would still have their mother, who was far out of reach, but she still loved him. Their dad would be across the ocean and, though he loved them, it just wasn't the same.

It would make her feel better to know that her dad had left without the feeling of sadness overwhelming him. She glanced down at her watch, it read 5:15. She had a good two hours before she had to go and see him.

"Those house elves really outdid themselves today," came the mocking voice of Sirius. "I don't think I've ever had a dinner so good… Shame I had to eat everything on the table, you would've enjoyed it." Rachael rolled her eyes, though she did think it possible for Sirius to eat everything. He dropped down on one of the armchairs and rubbed his stomach thoughtfully. "I almost felt bad eating James's dinner, hurt when he hit me though."

Rachael snorted. "I can imagine," she said.

"So," said Sirius, sitting up and folding his arms across his chest. "Your dad's leaving today?" Rachael nodded. "That's rough… especially when your mum just got sent to Azkaban today." Rachael raised an eyebrow at him. _Where did he hear that?_ "Yeah it was in the _Prophet_ today," he said, knowing what she was thinking.

"And why would they advertise that to the public?" she asked incredulously.

Sirius shrugged. "You know how those people are. They didn't care that Dumbledore wanted to keep it quiet. Don't worry; they didn't go too much into detail about why she did it or anything."

Rachael sighed in relief; at least she knew why people were looking at her funny now. Though she still found it rude for the reporters to even report what had happened, it was her business and no one else's.

"How've you been feeling?" Sirius asked as he began picking loose threads on the arm of his chair.

"Alright, I guess," she answered truthfully. "I'm still not recovered yet…"

"I could tell. I knew your mum was horrible, but not _that_ horrible."

Rachael raised her eyebrow at him. He was right about her mum, but she had also forgotten something he'd said to her at the beginning of the school year. He had stayed at her old house over the summer, which meant he got a first hand account of her mother. She also remembered him saying something about, "I'll tell her later," which involved his stay there.

"Sirius," she said slowly. "You stayed at my old house over the summer, right?" He nodded. "Didn't you say you were going to tell me about it?"

At first Sirius look confused, as though he didn't remember what she was talking about. Then a look of comprehension fell into his expression and he nodded quickly.

"I forgot about that," he admitted. "What with everything going on and all… Your mother was just telling Remus how he shouldn't talk to your or anything and I got mad and yelled at her, that's all."

"Well, what'd she say?"

"The usual stuff you've been hearing."

She nodded. She hadn't expected anything else really. She had to grin at the thought of Sirius yelling at her mother. Sirius, who was going to be only a thirteen year old in a short while, was yelling at her mother who was a forty three year old. She actually wished she had seen it, it would provide a good laugh for her. She could just imagine how red her mother's face must have been, probably as red as her, Rachael's, was the last time she saw her mother. She gave an involuntary shudder at the thought, which luckily Sirius didn't see.

"I honestly don't understand how she can be like that," Sirius said eventually. "She seemed nice when I first met her at your house. (Rachael laughed nervously at the thought of her mother being nice.) But then she doesn't even listen to you after the second time you almost killed yourself."

The moment he said that last sentence he knew he had made a mistake, just from looking at his friend's face. She was looking at him, her eyes wide and her mouth slightly open, wondering how he knew that. Sirius mentally kicked himself for saying it. He had promised Remus never to mention that to anyone, including Rachael. For a second she couldn't speak, not knowing how to react to this. But she finally was able to say something.

"S-second?" she stammered. "What d'you mean?"

Sirius heaved a sigh and murmured that Remus had told him about it over the summer and that he wasn't supposed to say anything about it.

"I'm sorry," he said dismally. "I shouldn't have mentioned it."

"You must think I'm crazy," she muttered, sinking back into her seat.

Sirius looked up at her in disbelief.

"I don't think you're crazy," he said honestly. "You're not crazy at all."

"Sirius, I tried to kill myself over a week over humiliation. It's not like they did anything life threatening."

"But that doesn't make you crazy, it just makes you human. You've had a lot of stuff to deal with. I would've been surprised if that thought _hadn't _crossed your mind at least once. Besides, craziness isn't necessarily a bad thing, you know."

Rachael smiled and rolled her eyes. "Only you would say that."

* * *

Soon after, Remus came down from the dormitory, looking quite impassive about everything that was said to him. The two trooped down to the Great Hall for the end of dinner and discovered that Sirius had actually been telling the truth when he said he felt bad about eating James's dinner. James was sitting at the far end of the Gryffindor table, desperately searching for some food, which had become scarce on the table. Remus took a seat beside James while Rachael sought out Lily on the opposite end of the table.

She looked around, trying to find the red head, but she was nowhere in sight. Thinking that she would just go and find her later, Rachael sat down and looked for some food that wasn't already digesting in Sirius. Unfortunately, there was hardly anything left on the table, save for a biscuit here or there. But there was nothing that would satisfy her for dinner. Shrugging in defeat, Rachael slumped forward in her seat and chewed on a biscuit. She looked at her watch; it was now twenty minutes to six. She had a little over an hour before she had to go see her dad.

She was still hesitant about going to see him. After all, she hadn't been reasonable when he first brought the subject up. How could she go back to him and act like everything was all right when it really wasn't? She needed something to say to him, something meaningful that would let him know she forgave him. Her simply saying that she was sorry didn't seem enough. She didn't know how long it would be before she saw him again. She shook her head miserably as she tried to think of something, but nothing came to her.

She stole a glance up at the staff table, thinking that her father might be there, but he wasn't. He was packing up the remainder of his belongings, getting ready for the train ride back to Kings Cross. Even though her dad did have a good reason for leaving, Rachael still had trouble dealing with it, probably more so then if he didn't have a good reason. She knew he was only doing what he thought was right for the two of them, but somehow that didn't seem to be a good enough excuse. _He's probably just trying to get away from everything that's happened_, she thought resentfully, and then silently cursing herself for thinking in such a way.

Her father was just as upset about what had happened three weeks ago as she was. She knew that it pained him just as much as it pained her, both physically and mentally. But that still wasn't a reason to go. He wasn't the one who had to look over his shoulder at the mention of his wife, she did. She didn't care about the jobs. Her father didn't have to move away just to earn enough money to raise his children. She would willingly go back to the orphanage if her father stayed. It would make the stay more bearable knowing that come September she could see her dad again.

That was the one thing she kept telling herself at the orphanage over the summer. She kept repeating it to herself over and over as many times as she could before she actually believed it. _You're going to see Dad again… just a few more weeks_. That was her motivation. That was the one thought that prevented her from reenacting the first week of school when she was ten. If she did reenact it, it would've worked because she would've had her own wand and Ms. Marshall couldn't stop her. She couldn't bear to think of her actually succeeding.

She finished her biscuit and looked around the table, realising that she was the only person left at the table. James and Remus had already gone. As she turned around to look around the rest of the hall, she saw that the only other occupants were Madam Pomfrey and Professor Binstom. Madam Pomfrey looked up from her dinner and saw Rachael looking up at them. She smiled and returned to her dinner. After returning the smile, Rachael got up and decided to look for Lily.

She walked up the stairs in the Entrance Hall, hoping to find her friend before she had to go see her dad. She looked around the hallways and saw no one, not a soul. Everyone seemed to be in their common rooms. She looked around the deserted hallway, hoping to find Lily walking up it any minute. She really needed to talk to her friend before her dad left. Lily would know what to say at a time like this, but Lily was nowhere to be seen.

She leaned against the wall and stood there thinking that if she waited long enough maybe Lily would come. She checked her watch again; it read exactly six o' clock. She had one hour to think up something to say. As she stood there she realised she was slowly developing a headache from thinking of a good last remark to say to her dad. But all it did was give her a headache.

She slid down the wall and held her head in her hands, trying to ignore the throbbing in her head.

"I can't think of anything," she groaned, all of the sudden disgusted with herself. "Dad's going to leave and I'm not going to have anything to say so he'll know I forgive him." She looked at the wall across her and vaguely thought that maybe the answer to her problem would come out of it. But to her misfortune the wall did nothing at all. "What am I supposed to say? That I was wrong to think that he was doing this all to escape from his life? That I was a hypocrite for even thinking that 'cause, if I had the opportunity, I'd do the same? I can't blame him. I just need something to tell him." She threw her head back and glared at the ceiling as though it was the cause of her problem. "What the heck am I supposed to say?" she yelled. "What the hell am I supposed to say to Dad so he can leave knowing that I'm sorry and that I love him?"

"Well, if you want my opinion, I think that was the perfect thing you could have said to me," said a voice from beside her. Rachael turned her head to the side and saw her dad standing beside her, looking down at her with the biggest smile on his face. It was the kind of smile she hadn't seen from him in a long time. He held out his hand for her and she took it and he helped her to her feet. "If there was anything I wanted to hear more from you than I wouldn't be a good father," he said, pulling his daughter into a hug. "All I needed to hear from you was that. And that was all I wanted to say to you. I love you, and I'll miss you."


	36. Farewell to Home

Chapter Thirty Six  
A Farewell to Home

Defence Against the Dark Arts was canceled the next day, and every other day after until Professor Dumbledore was able to find a new teacher. It was a very sad moment after Professor Lupin found his daughter in the hallway. He brought her with him to go get Remus, who was in the Quidditch stands watching the Gryffindor team practise, and the three of them went down to Hogsmeade station, where the twins would see their father off on the train.

Once down at the station, they stood with Professor Dumbledore, who had also wanted to bid the professor farewell. The two shook hands as Professor Lupin thanked Dumbledore endlessly for everything he had done for his family.

"No need to thank me, Gregory," Professor Dumbledore said, shaking his hand. "I would not be a real headmaster if I hadn't allowed your son into my school."

"Yes, but you've done so much for my family," Professor Lupin continued, wringing the headmaster's hand. "You've helped the authorities catch my wife so she can't come near my daughter anymore. You've helped my kids so much."

Professor Dumbledore smiled and nodded towards the train. Professor Lupin stepped away from the professor and looked at his children, who were watching him as he thanked Dumbledore.

"You know, this isn't really goodbye," he said, placing a hand on each of their shoulders. "I'm going to come and get you one day, and raise you myself. This is just something I have to do before I can do that. You understand, don't you?" Remus and Rachael nodded. They couldn't understand it at first, but now that their dad was really leaving, they knew it was for the best and he would never let them down. Professor Lupin picked up his bags and glanced at the train. "I'll see you soon." And he entered the train, off for America.

* * *

"Flip a coin and pick one!"

"Flip a coin? Sirius, this is supposed to be taken seriously!"

"So what? You want me to be serious?"

"Well, it wouldn't hurt…"

Sirius rolled his eyes at James's and went to go find a coin to flip. Rachael, Remus, Sirius, James, Peter and Lily were seated in the common room amongst their fellow second years as they pored over their elective class list. Professor McGonagall had handed them out during dinner and they had been looking at them over and over, trying to figure out what classes to take. Rachael had already chosen her classes – Care of Magical Creatures and Ancient Runes. Lily had decided to take those classes as well. But the boys were locked in what they made out to be a life or death situation when it came to this.

The four of them had already known that they didn't want to take Arithmancy or Divination but they would be taking Care of Magical Creatures. So they were stuck on choosing between Ancient Runes and Muggle Studies. Both classes seemed appealing, but they still couldn't decide, so that was Sirius's sole reason for flipping a coin.

"Got my galleon!" he announced as he reappeared in the common room. James looked over at him and twirled his finger in the air in false enthusiasm. He dropped it down on the table and looked from James, to Peter, to Remus. "Who wants to go first? Heads is Ancient Runes and tails is Muggle Studies." He looked at his three friends again. "Fine, I'll go first, then."

Sirius threw the coin up in the air, caught it, and flipped it over onto the back of his other hand. "Heads for me. Guess I'm taking Ancient Runes."

"You're not really going to take it just because you got heads, are you?" Rachael questioned.

"'Course I am," said Sirius. "I flipped the coin!"

James rolled his eyes and snatched the galleon off the table. He felt stupid about using Sirius's method, but he figured he wasn't going to be able to choose in any other way. He tossed the coin up in the air and watched as it landed on tails – Muggle Studies. James sat down on one of the chairs and quickly marked off Muggle Studies on his course list, while Peter went to flip the coin. Heads.

"Ancient Runes for me," said Peter as he handed Remus the galleon.

"Muggle Studies," Remus announced, tossing the coin back to Sirius.

The boys finished filling out there new courses, all the while muttering about how unfair it was that they couldn't drop Potions. Professor Binstom would be happy to get rid of any Gryffindor he could, especially Remus and his friends. They were known for wreaking havoc in the dungeons every Thursday and Friday. Binstom actually left a wanted notice on the bulletin board right outside his classroom, offering a reward for anyone who caught the four in the middle of either planning or executing a prank. Unfortunately for him, however, Rachael and Lily (who was roped into this unwillingly) managed to keep everyone out of the dungeons during this time.

Remus set his quill down on the table and cracked his knuckles loudly. He scratched his head in thought. He felt like he had forgotten something that he needed to do. He looked into the fire and thought. He had done all of his homework, so that definitely wasn't one of his worries. He had just completed his selection of new classes so he knew that wasn't bothering him, so what was it? He rested his head on his elbow and listened as his friends talked.

"When's Dumbledore going to get a new Defence Against the Dark Arts professor?" Peter asked James curiously.

_That's it_, thought Remus as he remembered what he needed to do. It had been a month since their father left and they still hadn't gotten a new replacement for Defence Against the Dark Arts, nor had Remus and his sister gone to Professor Dumbledore about the arrangements for them staying at the castle during the summer holidays. They were supposed to have done this a week after their dad left, but their homework was piling up on them so much that it made going to the Headmaster near impossible. Now was a perfect a time as any for them to go.

Remus got up from the chair he was sitting in and went over to his sister, who was listening to an anecdote of Lily's from Charms class. Remus walked behind the couch and tapped his sister on the shoulder. Lily stopped talking abruptly and Rachael looked around and raised an eyebrow at her brother.

"We've got to go see Dumbledore," he explained. At these words she raised her eyebrow even higher. She hadn't the faintest idea as to why they would need to go see Professor Dumbledore. "Remember, he needed to talk to us about staying here."

Rachael looked at him for a second, still not sure about what he meant, but then she mouthed 'oh' and followed him out of the common room.

They walked down the corridors, dodging students who were running to catch the last few minutes of dinner. They walked towards the second floor, stopping for a second to say hi to Frank Longbottom and Alice Gordon, but then hurried to Professor Dumbledore's office, hoping that he was in there and that the password he had given him the month before was still his current password. They finally approached two giant gargoyle statues and knew they were at the Headmaster's office, especially when one of the gargoyles rudely remarked, "Why would two students want to visit the all mighty Headmaster?"

Rachael and Remus looked at each other and back at the gargoyle.

"I didn't know statues had bad attitudes," Remus muttered sarcastically.

The gargoyle sneered at Remus, only to be scolded by the statue standing beside it. Remus smirked at the pair and said the password: Sugar Quills. The gargoyles sprang forward and to the side, revealing a long spiral staircase. The twins stepped forward onto it and started with surprise when the stairs began moving upwards. They waited patiently for the stairs to come to a halt and all the while they were thinking about the arrangements Dumbledore had mentioned.

Would they be staying in Gryffindor Tower during the summer holidays? Or perhaps they had separate rooms for these cases. It was possible for that, after all. Students had lived at the castle when they had no parents or their home lives weren't ones fit for children. They also wondered what it would be like to stay in the school the whole summer. The professors certainly didn't stay then so it would really only be the two of them, Professor Dumbledore and all of the ghosts, as well as the house elves who worked in the kitchens. It would be an odd feeling to be two of the three people living in such an enormous castle. Then again that had to be how Professor Dumbledore felt every summer when he was the only living thing inside the castle.

The stairs came to a halt, startling the twins. They exited the stairwell and knocked on the door to Professor Dumbledore's office. It was silent for a moment before the door opened on its own accord, allowing the two to enter. The two stepped cautiously over the threshold and were instantly stunned at the sight of the Headmaster's office. All around them were shelves filled with the most spectacular looking instruments. There were stacks upon stacks of sneakoscopes, dark detectors, little squares that buzzed around whenever someone walked by, which they guessed was a motion detector of some sort.

Also on the shelves were mounds of books, the Sorting Hat was perched on a pole next to a shelf and beside it was a cage with the most magnificent looking bird they had ever seen. It had red and orange plumage and stood proudly on its perch, letting out a beautiful note when it saw the twins watching it in amazement. Following the note of the bird were the footsteps of Professor Dumbledore as he appeared in the room.

"I see you've met Fawkes," he said, walking over to the bird and petting it on the back. "Phoenixes are lovely birds, are they not?" The twins nodded, feeling slightly uncomfortable now that Professor Dumbledore was in the room. "Now, I believe you're here about the arrangements for your stay during the summer holidays?"

"Yes," Remus answered promptly.

"Well, take a seat then." Dumbledore gestured to the two chairs that were placed in front of his desk. They took the seats offered to them and waited patiently while Dumbledore settled himself in his own seat. He leaned forward on his desk and folded his hands as he watched the twins. "Well, it's all very simple, actually," he said at long last. "Your common room will be open to you for the summer, so you will be staying in your dormitories. Also, there will be very few people in the castle, as I'm sure you're aware of already?" They nodded, waiting for him to continue. "Well, that means that you'll have to help the house elves. Peeves loves to get into mischief during this time of year and there's only so much the elves can handle. You don't mind doing the work, do you?"

"We don't mind," Rachael said. She knew about Peeves' pranks from experience and sympathized with the house elves. She never did forgive Peeves for when he pushed her into the flood in the girls' bathroom. Swimming against her will was just something she didn't like to do.

"Well, I believe that is all you need to know," said Dumbledore, rising to his feet and moving over to show the twins to the door. "Good day."

* * *

The next two months consisted of basically the same bland activities, such as schoolwork, homework, being chased about the castle by Snape, avoiding Peeves as he went on a rampage about the suits of armor (he saw the need to go inside at least one every day and pick a student to chase) and, of course, preparing for the oncoming final exams. All of these activities tended to get old after a week of them, especially studying for the exams that were still months off. But, of course, the professors didn't see this the way their students did and the students didn't expect them to see it their way.

However, they still found things to take their mind off homework and oncoming exams, one of the being James, Sirius, Remus and Peter's latest prank. The four had taken a considerable long break from their pranks because of everything that had unfolded since the first day of school – beginning with James and Remus fighting and ending with the departure of Professor Lupin from the school. Now, they realised, it was nearing Easter and the boys realised that they hadn't pulled off a single worthy prank in months. Their last prank was the failed attempt to throw water balloons on Snape during the Christmas break. So, they were back in their prank swing and were better than ever – starting with a little clothing prank on Snape, which gave him the nickname of "Snape the Cross Dresser."

It was a very simple prank and was executed excellently by James and Sirius, who managed to find a secret passage into the Slytherin common room. They had been _innocently_ walking around the dungeons admiring some of the paintings on the walls when they came across one of Salazar Slytherin. They knew, of course, that this wasn't the real entrance to the Slytherin common room, that entrance was a few portraits down, but this one was far simpler to open. All they had to do to open it was say how wonderful Slytherin was, all the while cursing themselves silently for praising such a house.

Their homage to Slytherin paid off, however, when they saw the fruits of their labour. During dinner that day, the hall was buzzing with calm chatter about classes and Quidditch, everything seemed to be business as usual. Then, suddenly, the hall went quiet and every head was facing the doors. Standing in the entrance was Severus Snape, dressed in a lime green knee length dress and bright pink high heel shoes and to top it all off was the fact that his face was decked out in horribly applied makeup. The hall was quiet for only three seconds before, a roar of laughter erupted and Snape growled menacingly at them all.

He marched down the aisle between the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff table; his head kept down as he did so, and placed himself at the Slytherin table. He had tried everything in his knowledge to reverse whatever charm had been placed upon him, but his efforts proved futile and he had to wait the humiliation out.

It was a wonderful few moments for James and Sirius, who were laughing hysterically with the rest of the hall. However, it soon ended when Snape hurled a pile of mashed potatoes at them and it splattered on the back of Sirius's head, causing a food fight to break out and resulted in them getting detention.

* * *

Luckily for the boys, their other pranks were not credited towards them; therefore they avoided any further detentions for the remainder of the year. Their second feature prank of the year wasn't targeted towards Snape; rather it was aimed at Professor Binstom's blackboard. They had found a nifty charm in a spell book of Professor Flitwick's. It was a charm that could make an inanimate object temporarily animate – it could talk and laugh and it would even develop facial features for a short amount of time. So the four decided it would be nice to know what Professor Binstom's blackboard thought about the professor and what they found out from it wasn't very flattering, not flattering at all.

"Professor Binstom?" said the blackboard in a high pitched voice as its bright blue eyes scanned the classroom. Its eyes fell on the professor, who was standing at the back of the room with his mouth hanging open and a stupid expression on his face. "I never liked the man," it continued, its faced contorted in disgust. "He never erased me properly. Now, you would think a blackboard wouldn't care about these things, but let me tell you, you are mistaken. How would you like to have the eraser battered against you when the professor is too lazy to use magic? It is not a pleasant experience, let me tell you. We do have feelings, you know, Marvin."

The class turned around and gaped at the professor… _Marvin_? Well, that was all they needed so they could burst out laughing at their professor.

* * *

It was now time for the Easter break and Professor McGonagall slowly made her way around the Gryffindor table during breakfast, taking down the names of the students who would be remaining at the castle for the holiday. Unlike the Christmas break, more students chose to stay at the castle so as to be able to get more peace in order to study for their upcoming exams. Lily, however, chose to go home for the holiday, but she didn't want to go alone.

"Why don't you come home with me?" Lily asked Rachael, who was busy concentrating on her toast, though she wasn't very hungry. Rachael looked up at her friend and immediately shook her head. "Come on," Lily pleaded. "It would be fun."

"No, Lily," she said firmly, she felt bad going to Lily's house and Lily could never go to her nonexistent house. Professor McGonagall waited patiently behind the two girls, tapping her foot on the ground.

"Please? You could meet my family! They're… interesting people."

"No, Lily. I need to uh… study for exams and stuff." She turned around and accepted the clipboard from Professor McGonagall so she could write her name down on the list. When the professor moved on to the next group of people, Rachael shrugged her shoulders apologetically. She did want to go to her friend's house for the holiday, but it just didn't seem fair.

* * *

The Easter break came and went and after that morning nothing was mentioned of it. Besides, neither of them had any time to mention it due to the fact that the moment all of the students returned to school they were loaded with massive amounts of homework. Every moment of the day, students were either seeking quiet in the library so they could study, or were on lockdown in their common rooms doing the same. Either way, every student had just one thing on their mind and one thing only – and that thing was studying.

Rachael, Lily, Remus, James, Sirius and Peter were all nervous about their exams. Unlike last year when they were prepared and knew they couldn't mess up, they had hardly studied this year and found themselves shivering with the nerves when June came around the corner. The boys had spent more time working on their pranks than their charms and Rachael and Lily had just been forgetful. So the moment the first week of June rolled down they had locked themselves in their dormitories and were up to their ears in studying materials.

However, once they sat down for their first exam, Transfiguration, they knew that their last minute cramming had paid off and they were going to pass with flying colours. The same feeling came with their Charms exam, History of Magic, Potions and Herbology. All of the students were spared of having to take a Defence Against the Dark Arts exam, as Dumbledore had yet to find a replacement. So, there was one small bright side to not having a professor for the subject. Still, it was a very small bright side and hardly made up for it.

The six were happy to find out that their feelings of passing were correct when they received their exam results. They had indeed passed with flying colours and were able to move on to the next year. Along with the thrill of passing all of their classes, was the thrill of Gryffindor winning both the Quidditch Cup and the House Cup.

* * *

"What are you doing?"

Rachael looked out the closet door and saw Becky Beckham watching her. It was the first day of the summer holiday and Rachael had been sent back to the orphanage in order to collect her belongings. She would stay at the orphanage for the remainder of the week and then on that Saturday she would be taking the Hogwarts Express back to the castle, never to go back to the orphanage again. Rachael pulled one of her jumpers off its hanger and stepped out of the closet to face her roommate.

"Packing," she said simply.

Becky raised a curious eyebrow.

"Packing for what? Have you been adopted or something." Rachael gave a sarcastic laugh and shook her head. No one would adopt a girl who was almost thirteen, so she hadn't a clue as to why Becky had thought that. "What then?" Becky pressed, even more inquisitive now.

"Well, you see, the Headmaster at my school is letting my brother and me stay at the school during the holidays," Rachael explained as she folded her jumper up and placed it neatly in her trunk. Becky walked over to where Rachael was standing as she processed what her roommate had just explained.

"But you're at the school all year anyway," Becky said. Rachael nodded and went back over to the closet to retrieve some more articles of clothing. "So, you're going to live there then?"

"Yeah, the Headmaster thought it would be a good idea. I'm staying for the rest of the week and then leaving on Saturday."

Becky nodded.

"Well, that's good, then," she said, adopting a cheerful voice. "You've always hated living here, now you won't have to."

Rachael smiled and finished packing up the last bit of clothes. She heaved her trunk up onto her bunk, wincing as she did so, and pushed it on her bed.

"Are you okay?" Becky asked as she saw Rachael wincing painfully.

Rachael had never fully healed from the beating her mother gave her and her ribs did tend to hurt her if she lifted anything heavy.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Rachael replied, climbing the rest of the way up the ladder and sitting down on her bed. "I hurt myself at school last week, roughhousing out on the grounds, fell in the lake and hit something." She laughed as though it was actually very funny, but she knew it was a fake laugh.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm fine, really, never been better."

Becky hesitated for a moment, as though she was going to ask again, but decided against it.

"Anyway," she said, dropping the subject completely. "I'm glad you're finally getting what you wanted, to get out of this place."

"Thanks… I'm glad I got it too…"

* * *

Soon came Saturday – the Saturday that Rachael would be leaving the orphanage for good, never having to go back unless it was on her own will, which she doubted very much that that would happen. She was standing outside of the orphanage waiting for the cab that Ms. Marshall had called earlier in the morning to take her to Kings' Cross. Rachael was leaning against her trunk and looking around the grounds of the orphanage as she reminisced on when she had first come there. She had discovered that she now had mixed feelings about the place in which she had lived for five years of her life. If she had been in this position the year before, she would've been only too happy about being able to leave, but now she wasn't so sure about it.

The year before she had no friends and Ms. Marshall didn't even acknowledge her unless it was for a reprimanding. Now, Becky was friendly towards her and, even though Rachael couldn't call her an actual friend like she could call Lily a friend, she did feel a little sad about leaving her and Ms. Marshall had become a sort of aunt to her. She was actually upset about leaving her. She sighed and looked down at three little girls, who couldn't be more than eight years old, playing tag. One of them tripped and fell on the ground. The two girls who had been playing with her began laughing, and did not stop when the little girl started crying.

Normally, Rachael would've tried to ignore this and pretend that she hadn't seen it. But Rachael had been in that position too many times and found she had to say something. She got up from her trunk and went over to the three girls.

"You shouldn't laugh at her," she said to the two girls, who were still chucking.

The two girls stopped giggling and looked up at Rachael, wondering why she had scolded them for laughing.

"Why not?" asked one of them.

"How would you like it if that was you?" Rachael countered as she knelt down and helped the crying girl up. "What if you fell and got hurt and your friends were laughing at you?" The girls looked shamefully at each other. "See, it's not funny anymore, is it?" The two shook their heads and looked at the girl, who was still crying, and apologised sincerely. "Good, now go on, go play."

She watched as the girls ran off, satisfied that she had helped them. She sat down on her trunk again and not a second after she had done so did the door open and Ms. Marshall came out.

"The cab should be coming soon," she said in a matter of fact voice.

"Around noon, right?" Rachael asked, checking her watch.

"It'll be here in ten minutes, then." Ms. Marshall walked over and placed a hand on Rachael's shoulder. "You've finally gotten what you wanted."

"That's what everyone keeps telling me, but right now I don't feel that it's what I wanted… I mean I've wanted to get out of here ever since I got her, but now that I've got the chance, I don't know what to think about it. So much has changed."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Becky used to hate my guts completely and now she's so nice to me, and you never used to pay any attention to me, but now you do… I've just got mixed feelings about the whole thing. I'm happy to leave because I'm going to get to be with my brother again, all the time. But, surprising as it is, I really think I'm going to miss this place…"

Ms. Marshall smiled down at Rachael. She knew this day was going to come soon and yet she never expected to hear those words uttered from that girl's mouth. She was glad to hear it though, it made everything seem worthwhile.

The cab pulled up in front of the building and the driver honked the horn.

"I'm glad to hear that," said Ms. Marshall. "And just remember, our doors are always open to you. If you ever need anything you can always come here. Now, hurry up or the cab will leave without you."

With one last smile, Rachael ran down the steps, dragging her trunk behind her, away from the place, which had been her home for five years… and was now no more than a memory.


	37. Betrayal and Memories

Chapter Thirty Seven  
Betrayal and Memories  
Fifth Year

"I can't believe you guys actually did it. You're crazy, completely crazy!"

"Ah, yes, we are quite crazy, my dear. But craziness is a virtue, if I do say so myself."

"Yeah… that's deep, Sirius… _real_ deep."

Sirius laughed and shook Rachael playfully in the shoulder. Rachael was sitting with Sirius, Peter and James, marveling at what they had shown her just moments before; she could still hardly believe it. In fact, she was positive she wouldn't have believed it if she hadn't seen it with her own eyes. Sirius, James and Peter had been trying for three years to become Animagi (_three long years,_ as James described it) and they had finally done it. The three were bursting with pride at their accomplishment and they couldn't wait to show Remus.

However, they were going to have to wait a bit before they could show Remus what they had done, as not one of them was too eager to go over to him at the moment. Remus was in the corner of them common room. Now, prior to three weeks ago that meant he was either immersed in an extremely good book, or he was recovering from a full moon and he needed the peace and quiet. However, three weeks ago Remus didn't have a girlfriend and his girlfriend wasn't Marilyn Brown. Now when Remus was found sitting in the corner of the common room it meant he was too busy with her to bother with his friends.

The four stole a glance at the corner of the common room and quickly looked away.

Rachael made a face of disgust at the two and turned to her other friends. "What does he see in her?" she wondered, looking quickly towards and away from them again.

Sirius laughed and took the liberty of answering her question.

"Well, let's see," he said thoughtfully, holding up his fingers, as he got ready to count them off. "She's got a pretty face, beautiful eyes… Oh, and did I mention she's a great kisser?" Sirius burst out laughing, and even more so when Rachael hit him on the back of the head, causing James to snigger rudely.

"Like you've even kissed her," Rachael said matter-of-factly.

"Nice one, Sirius," he snickered, causing Sirius to punch him in the shoulder.

"Hey, at least I _have_ a girlfriend to hit me," Sirius retorted coolly. "And now, if you don't mind –" Sirius began jerking his head towards Remus, indicating that James should go and retrieve their friend now.

James hesitated for a moment, thinking of a million other things he'd rather be doing, but a sharp shove in the back by Peter made him scamper over. James hurried over, wanting to get this done as quickly as possible. He glanced back at Sirius, who merely inclined his head in response. James stood there for a second, looking at Remus in wonder, almost hating to interrupt the scene before him. But he had to if he ever wanted to talk to his friend. So, he cleared his throat particularly loudly and Remus snapped his head up towards James.

"Uh… sorry to break up your little snog session," James apologised, though there wasn't the faintest trace of remorse in his voice. "But we've got something important to show you, Remus."

Remus looked at him curiously, unsure of what James was referring to. Truthfully, he really didn't want to go and see. So he disregarded James's comment, only until James took the freedom of grabbing Remus's arm and dragging him over to the portrait hole where Sirius and Peter were waiting. With Remus now in their ranks the four were able to go to the Room of Requirement so they could show him their accomplishment. The Room of Requirement was a very important and useful room for the boys, as it saved them from many detentions. The Room of Requirement was a room that was equipped with whatever the seeker needed. Usually when the four boys were in there it was stocked with four beds that resembled their ones in the boys' dormitory, as they were usually caught late at night with James's Invisibility Cloak. So the moment Remus stepped inside the room he knew what his friends had done.

The room was decked out in an exact resemblance to the Forbidden Forest. Remus only knew this for the few times he hadn't made it to the Whomping Willow and needed a place to hide for the full moon. All around him were trees of every kind – oak, willow, maple, and on the trees were birds' nests, and holes for the squirrels that nested there. On the ground was a trail of ants that were busy scuttling across the forest floor looking for their anthill. All around them, they could hear the sounds of the many inhabitants of the forest. They could hear the hooting of owls, the growling of wolves, and the stomping of the hooves of the many centaurs that lived in the depths of the forest.

Remus broke his attention away from the display of the Room of Requirement and turned to face his three friends, whom were all grinning at him. It took him a moment before he could say anything, as he was still too amazed at what they were about to show him. But, finally, he regained the use of his tongue and he could hardly keep the excitement out of his voice when he spoke.

"You guys did it?" he asked, wanting to jump for joy.

"Indeed, we did," said Sirius proudly.

"Took us long, though," said James in a voice suggesting that Remus should pity them.

"But we wanted to," Peter said quickly, throwing James a look.

Remus smiled and then before he could stop himself, he blurted out, "Well, are you going to show me?"

"Jeez, Remus, hold your horses!"

Remus waited patiently as his friends began their transformation. During their training they had to do many things to detect what animal they would be. They had to shout out the various calls of every animal in the book and even eat the kinds of things they ate, which caused them many trips to the Hospital Wing. But now all they had to do was concentrate on the animal they could become. Even though this proved to be rather difficult, it was definitely better than digesting a worm. Sirius concentrated on a large black figure, four legs, pointy ears, a large snout, and yellow eyes. Before Remus could even react, there stood a large black Labrador where Sirius had once stood. James, on the other hand, concentrated on a large white figure, with pointy brown antlers, a long body and four rigid legs and in a matter of minutes there stood a white stag in James's place. Peter, who was almost through with his transformation, concentrated on the last bit of his animal, a pink wormlike tail, and there was the finished product of a rat where he had been standing.

Remus stood and watched them, completely and utterly dumbfounded at what he was witnessing. He could hardly believe what he was seeing. His mind could hardly process that where his friends were once standing there were three animals that could only be identified by their specific markings. Sirius's marking was a faint scar on his nose that he received when Peeves the Poltergeist decided to inhabit a suit of armor and chase Sirius around the school. They could never really notice it before but it stood distinctly now through the pitch black fur. James's markings were the shape of his glasses around his eyes and Peter's was a birthmark on his foot that was shaped like a triangle. These were the only ways that you could tell who these animals were or even if they were really animals.

Remus moved over towards the animals and looked at them. He shook his head slowly, trying to make sense of this. But he realised that he didn't want to make sense of it, his friends had done it and that was all that mattered.

"Wow, that was disturbing," he joked, only to have Sirius dash over to him and attempt to knock Remus over. But Remus was too quick for Sirius, even in dog form, and stepped aside just in time for Sirius to narrowly avoid a collision with the tree Remus was standing in front of. Looking deterred by his near-collision, Sirius transformed back into his human self, while James and Peter followed the suit. James dusted off his robes and went over to Remus.

"Full moons will never be the same for you again."

* * *

And indeed James was right; full moons were never the same, although the first full moon could have been a little more successful. The night started off as usual. Remus would go down to the Hospital Wing before the moon rose, and Madam Pomfrey would smuggle him out of the castle and down to the Whomping Willow. However, unbeknownst to her, there were three others following, though they were shielded by an Invisibility Cloak. Following stealthily behind the nurse were James, Sirius and Peter, all shaking with excitement at the prospect of their first full moon as Animagi. So the second Remus disappeared under the frozen branches of the Willow and Madam Pomfrey had retreated back to the castle, the three boys dashed through the passageway before the branches started flailing again.

James led the way through the passage, making sure to keep a good distance away from Remus before his transformation. Soon enough they found themselves on the first floor of the Shrieking Shack. They stood stock-still for a moment when they heard the painful shouts of their friend as he made his transformation and, thinking it was as good a time as any, they turned into their Animagi forms and quickly made their way up the stairs. While going up the stairs, Sirius and Peter would've burst out laughing if they were in human form, as watching a stag trek stairs was very amusing.

Before they knew it, they found themselves facing a fully-grown werewolf, who was glaring down at them as though if they didn't move that very second he would rip them to pieces. The werewolf advanced on them, sniffing out his visitors, who were thinking about running away before he pulled any fast ones. Once he completed his sniffing he growled in what they figured was a friendly growl. Taking advantage of this, Sirius stepped forward, as did James, and Peter hurried forward on the ground. James engaged Remus in a game of werewolf/stag wrestling. It was fun at first, both to watch and play. James and Remus started out chasing each other around the room, but they soon moved out into the hallway as such a small room wasn't comfortable enough to accommodate a full-grown werewolf, stag, large dog and even for a small rat.

Remus and James chased each other around on the landing while Sirius and Peter barked and squeaked in delight at the sight of their playfully quarreling friends. James and Remus proved to be quite the matches for each other, neither one letting up so the other could win. But, in the end, the stag proved to be a better match for the werewolf when James sent Remus tumbling down the flight of stairs where he landed with a sickening crack. The three boys watched, horrified at the accident that had just taken place. They immediately transformed back into their human forms, absolutely sure that the werewolf would not be waking up any time soon.

"Smooth one, James," said Sirius irritably; stooping down to see what damage had been inflicted on his friend.

"Hey, it was an accident!" James defended, holding up his hands as though Sirius might throw a punch at him.

Peter shook his head at his two friends and decided to speak up, or else they weren't going to get anything accomplished.

"Maybe we should leave him here?" Peter suggested, gesturing down at the unconscious werewolf. "It would look a little suspicious if we brought a werewolf down to the hospital wing."

James and Sirius broke their glances away from the wolf and looked at Peter.

"Pete's right," said Sirius. "We should just go." And with that he led the way back up to the castle.

* * *

The next day Remus awoke to find himself in the Hospital Wing, his arm in a sling and an ice pack on his head. He tried to sit up, as he tried to recollect the events of the night before, but his head surged with an unbearable pain and he slumped back down into his pillow. He sighed and rubbed his aching head, his memory of the night before slowly coming back to him. He and James were wrestling in the Shrieking Shack… Sirius and Peter were watching them and apparently not one of them had noticed the flight of stairs behind them and… and Remus fell and his head hit the landing.

Remus only had to wait three minutes after he woke up for James, Sirius and Peter to come bursting in the Hospital Wing, with James making a dramatic apology. Remus rolled his eyes in disgust at James's profuse apology; he was almost sickened by it. _He could just say a simple sorry_, Remus thought as James went on begging for forgiveness. James was leaning on Remus' bedside, his hands folded as he pleaded over and over while Sirius and Peter watched him, with the same expression as Remus.

"I'm sorry!" James said for the millionth time. "I didn't mean it; I didn't even know the staircase was there!"

"Merlin, James, shut up already!" Remus blurted out, ignoring the stabbing pain in his head as he did so. James raised an eyebrow and looked at Remus, stunned. "I heard you the first thousand times!"

The three decided to spend a good few hours in the Hospital Wing, as it was a Saturday and they had all the time in the world. They talked about the night before and how it had been really fun, before Remus went tumbling down the staircase that is. They decided that becoming Animagi was probably the best thing they had ever done (besides making up a brilliant nickname for Snape – Snivellus) and that when the next full moon came they would have to go back to the Shack. Although they would take much safer tactics than they did before; they didn't want someone getting hurt again.

However, James, Sirius and Peter had to leave, much sooner than Remus would have liked. James had to go to Quidditch practise, Sirius had to go and tackle a Defence Against the Dark Arts assignment and Peter needed to go and tutor a Ravenclaw friend in Potions. So, Remus was left all alone, though he had no doubt in his mind that his sister would be up there soon enough.

* * *

Rachael walked through the portrait hole and into the common room, intent on getting her Defence Against the Dark Arts textbook. Professor Sauter had assigned them a lengthy essay on the importance of learning Dark Art defences and it was due that Monday. She hadn't even started hers yet. She walked over towards the staircase leading to the girls' dormitory, but something on the other side of the room caught her eye. She turned around slowly and stood horrified at what she was witnessing. She had to try with all her might to run out of the common room and pretend that she hadn't seen anything. But when she saw who one of the people was she couldn't help but go over and give the two people a piece of her mind.

"Wow, I guess you really got a lot of work done on that essay, didn't you, _Sirius_?" she snarled, causing a startled Marilyn Brown and an embarrassed, not to mention guilty, Sirius to jump up. Sirius whirled his head around and his face turned an unnatural shade of red. Marilyn, on the other hand, didn't look the least bit disturbed, and this only infuriated Rachael even more.

"Tell me, Sirius," Rachael said her voice struggling to contain her rage. "Did I disturb you at all?"

"Yes, you did, actually," Marilyn said nastily.

This angered Rachael even more. It was a well-known fact that these two did not get along well and this only fueled the fire of hatred even more.

"I wasn't asking _you_," she snarled. "I was asking _him_." She glanced at Sirius, completely ignoring the fact that Marilyn was slowly edging away from them, not wanting to get more involved than she already was. Sirius avoided her eyes and looked down at the floor as he ran a nervous hand through his hair, trying to make up a decent explanation. When Rachael knew that no explanation would be coming, she shook her head and ran out of the common room, only to have Sirius follow her. Rachael quickened her pace, not wanting to Sirius catch up with her. He did manage to fall into step with her, only by stepping on the hem of her robes.

"It's not what it looked like!" he defended lamely.

Rachael gave a harsh laugh and rounded on him with a look in her eyes that made Sirius want to run away from her forever.

"Not what it looked like?" she said sarcastically. "Oh, I'm glad it wasn't what it looked like! Because for a minute I could have sworn it looked like you, my boyfriend might I add, was kissing Remus's girlfriend!" She looked at Sirius, waiting for him to fess up and admit that he was indeed doing just that. "Wasn't that what you were doing? I said… _wasn't it_?"

"Yes it was," he said, his voice filled with guilt and regret, but Rachael didn't care. "And I didn't mean to… it just happened."

"You didn't mean to? How could you_ not_ mean to kiss someone? What, did she faint and you decided to give her CPR? Because if that was any one of your pathetic excuses, then I don't know why I ever trusted you in the first place."

Sirius stepped forward and looked at her firmly, standing his ground. "I didn't mean to do this. She was saying how upset she was over Remus getting hurt and I dunno… it just happened. I didn't mean it," he said, his voice not wavering for a second.

Rachael didn't care if his voice wavered or not. "Oh yeah, she was _real_ upset, then. How could you _not_ mean to?" she asked incredulously. "You said yourself that she was a great kisser!"

"I was joking, for Merlin's sake!"

"Well, you sure won't be joking about it now, will you?" She turned on her heel and began dashing away back towards the Hospital Wing. Sirius watched her advancing back, thinking for a second about what he could say to make her believe that he was really sorry. But, in the end, that was the only thing he could say.

"I'm sorry!" Sirius called after her.

"Go away, Sirius," she called back, quickening her step.

"But I-"

"Go away!"

* * *

Betrayed and stupid, that was all she felt, utterly betrayed and completely stupid; she could find no two words that described how she felt better than those. She didn't understand why Sirius would do such a thing. What had possessed him to do that? He not only betrayed her, he betrayed Remus as well. She didn't ever think Sirius would ever betray Remus, as their bond was only matched by his friendship with James. She was disgusted with him for what he did. In fact, she was so disgusted she was having difficulty in deciding if she should even talk to him. She couldn't stand what his stupid act did to Remus. What Sirius did was slowly eating away from him. After all, he had been so convinced that he would never be able to find someone because of his illness and, even though Marilyn hadn't the faintest idea of what he was, he thought that wouldn't matter even if she did know. But, no matter how much Remus was suffering; she doubted he was suffering as much as she was.

Remus didn't know Marilyn as well as she knew Sirius and the fact that Sirius would actually do something like that made her consider rethinking their entire friendship. She didn't want to believe what he did, but she had to if she wanted to be able to figure out how to handle the situation she was in. She leaned back on her bed and stared out the window, admiring how much the weather resembled her mood. It was cold and dreary outside; there grey skies and rain slowly pattering against the window. She wasn't going to cry about it though, so she ignored the rain. She knew crying about it wouldn't help, and she didn't want to. It wasn't something to be that upset over. In fact, though she was upset, she was more annoyed and confused.

That was why she needed a parent to help her with this. This was what made her wish she had one who she could talk to. A parent could help her decide if she should forgive Sirius or just forget that she had ever met him. She didn't want to forgive Sirius though, unless she got a real reason for what he did. If she forgave him without question, she would still feel betrayed. But she had no parent who could help her with this, so she was left to think about it herself. The only problem was that, at the moment, all she could think of was avoiding Sirius. It had actually been working quite well, as she hadn't seen hide or hair of him outside of class.

She rolled over onto her back when she heard the door open and quickly grabbed her reading book on the nightstand. She flipped to a random page and acted like that was what she had been doing the whole time.

"You okay?" Lily asked as she crossed the room and removed her cloak.

Rachael pretended to mark the page and closed the book. "Yeah," she said in a false cheerful voice. "I've never been better."

Lily raised an eyebrow and sat down on her bed. "You're still thinking about Sirius, aren't you?"

Rachael considered lying for a moment, but nodded her head shamefully. Lily was angry with Sirius as well, but she knew it wasn't something her friend should dwell on.

"There's nothing else to think about," Rachael admitted, sitting up and resting her head in her hands.

"Well, I have something for you to think about." Rachael looked at her friend curiously. What could Lily possibly be about to tell her? She had a hunch though as to what it might be. "You know how it's Christmas break next week? Well, I talked to my parents and they thought it would be nice if you came and spent the holidays at my house."

Rachael bit her bottom lip in frustration. Why did Lily keep bringing this up with her? She knew the answer she would get. Every year, since their second year, Lily would ask Rachael to come and spend either Christmas or Easter at her house and every year she got the same response. Rachael just didn't feel right going to her friend's house when she didn't have a home of her own to invite Lily to.

"Lily," she began, but Lily quickly cut her off.

"Come on, you're my best friend and my parents have never even met you. Besides, you're going to be here all by yourself!"

She had a point. Remus was going home with James, Peter was going to visit some relatives in Spain and Sirius was going home as well – not that she cared. Sighing in defeat, Rachael nodded her head.

"Fine, I'll go."

* * *

The Hogwarts Express screeched to a halt and almost immediately students began pouring out into the corridors, dragging their luggage along with them. Not one student could wait another minute on the train. They were too eager to go see their parents whom they hadn't seen since September. Rachael, Lily, Remus, James and Peter exited their compartments and hurried to find their luggage. Upon finding it, they exited the train with the last pack of stragglers and scoured out the area in search of their families. James was the first to find his, who were standing off by the entrance to the platform. He grabbed Remus' wrist and yanked him over, while the both of them shouted hurried goodbyes to their friends. Peter found his next and, with a quick goodbye and Merry Christmas, he went off to greet his family.

Lily looked around the crowded platform, thinking that she would wait to wish their friend Alice Gordon happy holidays. However, she decided she would never find her in the mass of students and therefore led the way out to the main train station. Walking, unnoticed, through the barrier between platforms nine and ten, they spotted a group of three people, all with bright red hair. Lily smiled and pulled Rachael over. _So this is the Evans family…_

"Lily!" said the red haired woman enthusiastically. Lily ran over and her mother pulled her into a hug.

"How was school?" the red haired man asked as he embraced his daughter.

"Good," Lily answered as she acknowledged the red haired teenager with nothing more than a simple nod of the head.

Mr. Evans looked over at Rachael, who was hovering uncomfortably in the background and turned to his daughter. "Is this your friend?"

"Yep, Rachael Lupin, meet my mum, dad and sister, Petunia," Lily introduced, gesturing to each member of her family in turn. Rachael smiled and muttered a pleasant hullo. Mrs. Evans smiled.

"Hullo dear, it's nice to finally meet you."

"Nice to meet you too," said Rachael politely.

"Well," said Mr. Evans, clapping his hands together. "Let's not stand around here in the crowd. We parked the car over there." Mr. Evans led the way over to an old station wagon parked just outside of the station.

The three girls got into the backseat of the car and found it to be quite a painful squeeze. It was clear that two fifteen-year-olds and a seventeen-year-old were not meant to share the space in the back. But they managed and were soon off for the Evans household. During the drive, Lily's father tried many times to engage the girls in conversation, but they were futile attempts as none of his topics were really engaging. He gave up soon enough and turned the radio on to find a Rolling Stones song playing on one of the stations. Petunia scowled at her father's choice of music, but Lily and Rachael greatly approved.

Although the overall atmosphere of the ride wasn't pleasant, Rachael found it enjoyable looking out the window at all of the scenery. As she had not been outside of the Hogwarts grounds in three years, other than leaving it to visit Hogsmeade, she found it fun to see all of the buildings bunched up together on the town streets, and she didn't even mind seeing the smog from the cars. As she looked around at all of the shops and banks, she wondered how she could have ever found them so confining. Looking at the buildings reminded her of the orphanage. She hadn't been there in three years and was surprised to suddenly find herself wanting to go there. The very thought of even thinking such a thing shocked her, though it really shouldn't have since the day she left she was a little reluctant to leave. Maybe while she was staying with Lily she could go and visit; she knew they couldn't live too far from there.

Soon enough, Mr. Evans was pulling the car into the driveway of a white one-story house and Mrs. Evans, Lily and Petunia were unbuckling their seatbelts and preparing to get out of the car.

"Well, we're home," said Lily to Rachael as she followed her sister out of the car. Mrs. Evans went inside to cook dinner instantaneously and Petunia followed her, merely to get away from the girls. Mr. Evans, on the other hand, stayed outside to help his daughter and Rachael get their trunks out of the trunk of the car. Lily and Rachael dragged their trunks up the walkway and Lily led her friend down the staircase they saw upon entrance through the front door.

Downstairs was the basement that had been converted into a family room. In the family room were wooden paneled counters with shelves full of books inside of them. Along with those books was a bookshelf in the far right corner near the foosball table and television set. On the left side, next to the landing, was a door with a sign on it. The sign was decorated with pictures of wands, wizard hats, black cats and cauldrons and in the centre of the drawings was a slogan that said, "Lily's Room: Beware of Paranormal Activity." Rachael laughed and trailed Lily into the room.

"Nice sign," Rachael commented with a laugh.

"It's the only thing that keeps Petunia out," replied Lily in an exasperated voice.

Rachael placed her trunk on the cot that had been set up and looked around, taking in her friend's room. Lily's room had a theme of any and all animals; all around the room was some species of an animal. On her bed was a yellow and blue bedspread with birds and butterflies scattered across it, along with that was her dog shaped pillow. She had posters of wolves, kangaroos, koala bears and saber toothed tigers dispersed across her wall and on her dresser (which Rachael could swear resembled a tiger) was an owl shaped lamp sitting next to the empty cage of Rosey the owl.

"Nice room," said Rachael, folding her arms across her chest. "I guess you like animals."

"No… really?" Lily retorted. "I love animals. If I could, I'd probably have a lion for a pet instead of an owl."

Rachael chuckled. "Bet Petunia would _love_ that."

Rachael helped Lily unpack her trunk before they went upstairs, deciding that they would help Mrs. Evans with dinner. They would be eating early that day, as Mr. Evans wanted to take the family out to go to see a movie and then the mall. Usually Lily wasn't that big of a fan of eating before five. But, in this case, she didn't mind at all and wanted to have dinner on the table as soon as possible. So it only took them a half hour to go upstairs and find Mrs. Evans chopping up a tomato.

"Need help?" offered Lily. Mrs. Evans looked over at her daughter and declined politely. "Come on, dinner'll get cooked much faster." Mrs. Evans smiled at her daughter's persistence and allowed the girls to make the salad.

The two had fun making the salad. They pretended that they were in Potions class and the cucumber they were supposed to be chopping was a daisy root. They were busy discussing how precisely they should slice it.

"Now, I believe if we skin it so only a fraction of a centimeter comes off, we will have the perfect potion," said Lily in a deep voice, imitating Professor Binstom the Potions Master. "You see, once we do that we must cut two inch thick slices and place them in their exact spots on top of the lettuce, which has already been chopped to perfection."

"But, Professor," whined Rachael. "We can't do that, we not psycho enough!"

"Was that smart talk I just heard, Miss Lupin? Do you want me to deduct fifteen points from Gryffindor? I'm sure your friends won't mind, since you cost them ten points last week."

"Hey, that was Snape's fault!" Rachael shouted, taking the napkin on the table and flinging it at Lily.

Mrs. Evans walked over and placed down the plate of chicken parmesan on the table and called up the stairs for Petunia and Mr. Evans to come down. In not even a second, the two were in the kitchen and sitting at their respective places around the table. Once everyone was seated, food was passed around and Mr. Evans attempted to make conversation, which they soon found out wasn't a good idea.

"So, Rachael," he said, looking up from his meal and at Lily's friend. "What are your parents doing for the holiday?"

Rachael and Lily exchanged nervous glances and immediately she did some quick thinking. She was just lucky she had practise from when she had to make up excuses for Remus' absences. What would Mr. Evans say if he knew her mother had only just been released from house arrest?

"Well," she stammered. "My mum is… she's… she's visiting my sick grandma in Romania."

Mr. Evans nodded slowly. "And your dad?"

"My dad? He's sort of… kind of… dead."

Mr. Evans' fork stopped in mid air and he turned an embarrassing shade of red. Rachael tried to smile as if she wasn't bothered by it, but it was a futile attempt. "I'm sorry… when did he die?"

"About three months ago, but it's okay, I'm fine with it, really I am."

But it was a lie; she wasn't okay with it at all, the pain was still weighing within her. She remembered the day clearer than any other. She remembered it clearer than when Remus got bitten by the werewolf. It stood out in her mind more than the days she met Lily, James, Sirius and Peter, than when she followed Remus to the Willow, than the day she was beaten by her mother. That day was the clearest in her mind.

She didn't want to believe Dumbledore when he told her and Remus the bad news. Their father, who was still working in America, had an accident concocting a potion. It turned out that his partner had added one too many daisy roots and when Professor Lupin tested it, it poisoned him. He died in his sleep that night. It pained Dumbledore to tell them this. He had been very close with the professor when he worked at Hogwarts and still kept in touch with him outside of school. But it could never pain him as much as it did to Remus and Rachael, they couldn't stand to believe what they were hearing. Their father was dead and there was no way he was coming back.

* * *

"Are you okay? You seemed distracted all night."

Lily was right. Rachael had been distracted all night, through the movie and their walk to the mall; she was a walking zombie. She didn't even notice when Lily spotted a Rolling Stones poster and shoved it under her nose. She couldn't even remember what happened in the movie they saw. Heck, she didn't even remember what movie they had seen. Her mind was fogged with the memories of the days following her father's death and how bleak they were, how they were plagued with misfortunes and a little fortune. She was more than distracted, she was stuck in a nightmare and she wasn't even asleep.

"Yeah," she replied in a dazed voice. "I'm great."

Lily studied her friend closely for a moment, before declaring that she was going to take a shower, knowing that Rachael needed some time alone. Once she was sure Lily was out of the room, Rachael curled up on her cot and took a shuddering breath, trying to clear her mind of what was coming. But she couldn't, she let it come. She remembered the day of her father's funeral; she remembered the dark clouds and the solemn faces of her friends and the Headmaster as he gave his eulogy. It was a day she never would forget, even though she wished she could forget it at that very moment.

* * *

"_Gregory Lupin was a very dedicated father… He was always there for his children and always wanted to be with them. He always came through for his family, especially when times were rough, he would never let his children down. He was a man who we never wanted to see die…" _

_Rachael kept her head bowed as she listened to the professor talk, knowing that every word he said was true. He didn't want to leave her and Remus, but he had to. Rachael took a deep breath and looked up from the ground at the few people who were assembled around the tombstone. Remus was next to her, he was watching the Headmaster speak, though he looked like he would much rather be anywhere else. James stood next to Remus, watching Professor Dumbledore, but also keeping a hand on Remus' shoulder; Sirius and Peter were across from them, looking firmly at the ground as they took in the eulogy. The other members of the funeral party were professors from Hogwarts. As Professor Lupin was an only child, he had no brothers or sisters, and the twins had no grandparents at all to attend the funeral. _

"_And remember; never forget one of the few good men left on this planet. Never forget Gregory Lupin." Professor Dumbledore looked up from the grave and with one gesture of the hand, the funeral party dispersed to separate corners of the cemetery._

_Rachael stood in her spot a moment, and saw Remus go off to speak with Professor Dumbledore, probably discussing their father's will. She didn't even want to think about that right now. What she needed was a quiet area to sit and think. Despite that the cemetery was always quiet, the low buzz of murmuring was distracting, and so she went looking for a secluded bench. _

_She broke through the small group of people, stopping only for a minute to exchange a few words of sympathy with Professor McGonagall and then she was off to sit on the bench she had just spotted between the trees. Stopping one last time to trade a few words with Professor Flitwick, she was able to make it over to the bench and sit quietly with her face in her hands. Even without the noise she couldn't think straight, she couldn't get her thoughts to come together. Her father was dead, that was all she thought that made sense… he was dead. _

_It all happened so fast that she hadn't had time to process it. One minute she and Remus were cheering on James in a Quidditch match and the next she found herself in the Headmaster's office learning that her dad had died. It just wasn't fair to her. Why did her father, of all people, have to die? What had he done to deserve such an early end? He was barely forty-eight and God saw it fit to take him from the world? He was such a good man with a kind hear. He was the kind of father one would have to search far and wide for. Why did he have to die all because of some stupid mistake of his co-worker? She wished she could meet the man who unintentionally killed her father, not to yell or make accusations, but just so she could know who caused her father's death._

_But, in all honestly, she really didn't know what to do. What was there to do? She was never going to see her dad again, no one was. Remus couldn't, James couldn't, Sirius and Peter couldn't. He was gone forever all because of one little mistake. She hadn't seen him for three years and, every time she thought about him, she would hope for him to come back to England so she and Remus could go and finally rejoin the last member of their real family. Now that was never going to happen. Why was life so unfair? It didn't make sense to her why the bad guy could live but the good guy could die, who made up these twisted rules? She didn't know who did, and she didn't care either, all she knew was that whoever made up the rules had just taken away the one person who meant the most to her, and she was never going to get him back. _

"_Hey," came Sirius's voice from beside her. _

_She turned her head to see Sirius walking over to her. She slid over on the bench to make room for him and said,_ _"Hi."_

"_I was just talking to Remus," Sirius continued quietly. "He's doing okay, or at least that's what he says. So I thought I'd see how you were." He looked at her expectantly, waiting for an answer._

"_Oh… yeah I'm fine, just great." _

_Sirius narrowed his eyes at her, seeing right through her lie. He could tell by the look in her eyes and the tone in her voice. If she was anything at all, it wasn't fine. He sighed and turned to face her._

"_No you're not," he said. "Come on, talk to me. If you can't tell your brother or me about how you're feeling who can you tell?"_

"_It's just… oh I don't know… I don't know what to think," she stammered, struggling to keep her voice in check, trying not to cry like she wanted to. "My dad's dead! How do you think I feel? I feel so rotten and horrible. What're Remus and I supposed to do? Our dad's gone forever and we can't get him back. I just don't know what to do… Every good thing that's been in my life just goes and leaves. Remus used to have a normal life before that stupid werewolf bit him. My mum left us. Now my dad dies. Everything good just disappears. It just keeps happening. What if I lose you guys too? What if you, Remus, James, Peter and Lily just disappear too?" _

_She took a deep breath and rubbed her stinging eyes, knowing that Sirius saw she was on the verge of hysteria, but she didn't care. She didn't care about anything anymore. All she cared about was her dad, her dead dad who she was never going to see until she, herself, died. That only meant that it was going to be a long time before she saw him again, and truth be told, she didn't want to wait… but she knew she had to. _

"_Come on," said Sirius, his voice softening a little. "You and your brother are going to be fine… You've been through other bad stuff and you've gotten through it. You just have to wait this one out. I can't say I know how you feel, but I know you're not going to feel better anytime soon… But don't worry, we're not going anywhere, we'll always be there for you. And look, if you feel like crying, don't be embarrassed." _

_But Rachael didn't need Sirius to tell her that. She just let it all out, every last one of her horrible feelings poured out. Sirius looked down at her sympathetically, putting his arm around her and patting her comfortingly on the back. He listened patiently to his friend's sobs, not bothering to stop her. He knew this was something she had to get out now more than later. _

"_It's okay," he whispered consolingly. "Everything's going to be alright. You're gonna be fine…" _

* * *

"_We finally found you," said James an hour later._

_Sirius looked up to see James and Remus walking towards him. Rachael had fallen asleep and Sirius, not wanting to wake her, hadn't move. His friends found him staring lazily into space. Remus took a seat on the bench and James stood in front of it, looking down at Remus._

"_We weren't looking for you the whole time," said Remus, explaining that James was exaggerating. "We were with Peter for a while before he had to leave, then we came looking for you."_

_Sirius nodded. "So… how're you feeling?"_

"_Fine," Remus answered quickly, not wanting to bother Sirius about how he really felt. He had probably heard the same from his sister already; there was no need for him to hear it again. "After the Hogsmeade trip tomorrow me and my sister have to go with Dumbledore to the hearing of our dad's will… That should be fun…"_

"_I forgot about the Hogsmeade trip. You guys are going?"_

"_It's better than sitting around the castle thinking about the hearing. Besides, we haven't been to Hogsmeade since Valentine's Day." Remus sighed and stood up, gesturing to Sirius to wake his sister up. "Dumbledore wanted us to get back to the castle soon. We shouldn't make him wait any longer than he has to." _

_It only took Sirius a matter of minutes to wake her up. She groggily sat up and looked around, realising that they were still in the cemetery._

"_We're still here?" she asked sleepily. _

_Remus nodded and held out a hand to help her up._

"_But we've gotta go," he said. "Come on." _

_Remus led the way through the grove of trees, with a quick wave back to James and Sirius. They turned to look at his father's grave on last time. He and his sister agreed on only going to see it on Christmas and his birthday, knowing that their dad wouldn't want them dwelling on his death too much. So Remus needed to get one more look at it before they left._

_Here lies Professor Gregory H. Lupin  
1927-1975  
Respected professor, master of potions, and loving father of two  
A man to never be forgotten_


	38. The Past and Present

Chapter Thirty Eight  
The Past and Present

When Rachael awoke the next morning she discovered that Lily was still sleeping soundly in her bed. Taking a glance at the clock, she saw that it was nearly eleven. _Figures… Lily's always been a late sleeper when she could be_. Rachael raised herself out of bed, took some clothes out of her trunk, and went to take a shower. She knew a shower would help her wake up, as she hadn't gotten to sleep until five in the morning. There were visions of the funeral still fresh in her head and refusing to go away until sunrise, when she was finally able to rest easy. As she took her shower, she found herself vaguely annoyed at Mr. Evans for bringing the subject up, despite the fact that she knew she shouldn't be mad with him. She couldn't help it. She just hoped no one would bring it up again.

Once she was done with her shower and brushing her teeth, she packed up her old clothes in her trunk and took a seat on her cot, waiting for Lily to wake up. Thinking back on the funeral, which had only been the October before, she realised that she didn't really remember much from it, except that one part. She found it odd, though. She was sure she would remember everything from then, but perhaps her mind had chosen to block it out. It was strange that she remembered the next day so clearly. Sirius had asked her to go to Hogsmeade with him and how they had run into the last person they wanted to see. She couldn't even believe they had seen her. She was the last person they expected to come across.

* * *

_She and Sirius were standing in front of the post office, after mailing a letter to Sirius's parents, as he was required to do every time he visited Hogsmeade. He didn't really understand why they made him do this. It was probably to make sure that he was not in a coma or dead. The two were now debating on whether to go to Zonko's or to the Three Broomsticks. Sirius couldn't decide on either and Rachael was indifferent to both choices, so she left him to battle it out. He was saying to himself how it was pretty cold out and he could definitely go for a butterbeer. On the other hand, he hadn't been in Zonko's for ages and he needed to restock on Dungbombs. _

_Rachael was about to tell Sirius that he could go to Zonko's first, spend a little while there, and then go to the Three Broomsticks and he would be happy, but something across the street caught her eye. What she saw made her immediately forgot about what she was going to tell him. Across the street, at the corner, was a middle-aged wizard, who looked as if he worked for the Ministry. He was closely guarding a pale woman who appeared as if she hadn't seen daylight for years. The woman looked remarkably like Rachael, her eyes especially. They were green ones, just like hers. How could it be? She didn't want to stick around long enough to find out how it was possible. She quickly grabbed Sirius's wrist and tried pulling him down the street, but it was too late. _

"_Come on, Mrs. Lupin," said the Ministry wizard, leading Rachael's mother across the street. "Say hullo."_

_Sirius looked at the man, confused for a mere second, before he realised who the man was with. _

"_Let's go," he said to Rachael, who was only too eager to comply. They didn't get the chance though, as the wizard headed them off as they tried to make a break for it. _

"_Rachael Lupin," said the wizard, looking down at her with a kind face sensing her nervousness and desire to run. "I am Mr. Charlie Gibbins. I work with the Ministry of Magic and have been in charge of your mother's case. As you can obviously tell, she has been let off house arrest."_

"_So I see," Rachael muttered bitterly, wanting desperately for the man to go away. "Um… is there any particular reason you're telling me this?"_

"_We think it would be a good idea for you and your mother to make amends and forget the past." _

_Rachael raised an eyebrow at the man. _Forget the past?_ How could she forget the torture her mother put her through when she was younger? This Ministry wizard was in over his head if he thought he could make her forgive her mother. _

"_Look I've got to be somewhere soon, so I think I should just –" She made to leave but the man stopped her._

"_Nonsense, I think you should just talk to your mother for a minute," he said in his most persuasive voice._

"_Listen," Sirius said suddenly. "She said she has to be somewhere and you can see that she doesn't want anything to do with this woman after what she did to her." _

_Mr. Gibbins laughed and placed a hand on Mrs. Lupin's shoulder._ "_I assure you, Mrs. Lupin is harmless."_

"_Oh, yes," said Rachael, her voice becoming a little hysterical. "She's completely harmless! She only beat me when I was twelve… Yes, she's completely harmless."_

"_It was anger issues that have been solved. Two years of imprisonment in her house have made her see the errors of her ways."_

"_Actually, Mr. Gibbins, I think those anger issues have come back," said Mrs. Lupin, speaking for the first time. The three looked down at her and saw she was glaring at her daughter with a look of the utmost hatred. Rachael took a few cautious steps backwards, though her eyes never left her mother. "I really don't understand why you brought me here. As you can see, my daughter is just as much of a delinquent as she was three years ago."_

"_I'm not a delinquent! I never was! I never will be! What don't you understand about that? How thick is your skull?" _

_Mr. Gibbins clearly saw that something bad was going to happen, so he decided to step in. The only problem was that he made the situation worse. _"_Well, I can see that you two need to talk this over amongst yourselves," he said, quickly edging towards the door of the building behind him. "I'll be back soon." And before anyone could even react he bolted through the door. _

_For a minute, all the two did was glare at each other, neither one of them saying anything. After another moment, Mrs. Lupin boldly chanced speaking._

"_I see you haven't changed much since the last time I saw you," she appraised. "You don't look as beat up, however."_

"_Yeah, well, that's because no one, other than you, has decided to beat the living daylights out of me," Rachael snarled. "I know you're disappointed that I don't have the bruises anymore. I know you would've LOVED to see them."_

"_Yes, I would have," Mrs. Lupin agreed, nodding her head vigorously. "I love to see the fruits of my labour." Rachael flinched slightly upon hearing this. How could a mother say that to her daughter? How could someone even _think_ to say that they wanted to see their child in pain? It was one of the many things Rachael couldn't even bear to fathom about her mother. She wanted nothing more than to walk away at that very moment. Just as she was about to, her mother quickly struck her across the face. Smiling as she admired her handiwork, she said, "Maybe now I can see them."_

_Rachael didn't even say anything; she didn't want to give her mother the satisfaction of seeing her pain. Instead, she merely turned on her heels and walked up the street, without looking back. Sirius, on the other hand, did not follow her. He chose to stay and give Mrs. Lupin a piece of his mind._

"_You remember me, don't you?" he asked pleasantly, though with a hint of resentment in his voice. _

_She studied him for a moment. Sirius had grown quite a bit since the last time she'd seen him. When she finally recognised him, a look of comprehension appeared on her face._

"_You're that Sirius boy, aren't you?" she said, undoubtedly surprised. "Yes I do remember you. Are you going to tell me off again?"_

"_No, I'm not," he replied, shaking his head. "I'm just going to tell you that you have a daughter who's in mourning for her dead father, your husband by the way, and the way you're treating her is only making it worse. Now, I'm going to go and find her because I actually care about her." Sirius made to leave, but quickly stopped himself. "Oh, I forgot, go to hell please. Goodbye."_

_Rachael stood farther up the street, listening as Sirius told Mrs. Lupin off, even though he claimed he wasn't. Rubbing the side of her stinging face, she waited for him to catch up with her. She did not dare to go back near her mother. She couldn't believe the woman. Not for her own life could she understand what she did that made her mother hate her, and then to slap her right when she got off house arrest? Did she enjoy being locked up for years without any escape?_

"_I forgot how much I despised that woman," Sirius muttered angrily, as he joined Rachael in front of an old rotting fence. _

_She nodded absently. She hadn't forgotten how much she loathed her mother, but she did hate her just the same. The two decided it would be best if they forgot what had just taken place and set out for Zonko's._

"_You okay?" Sirius asked as the anger in his voice dissipated. _

"_Yeah, I'm fine… as always," Rachael answered, trying to keep her voice light._

"_Well hopefully that's the last we'll be seeing of your mother today…" _

* * *

And it was the last that they had seen from her that day, and from every day on. She was glad about that too. She had actually been narrow minded enough to think her mother might see the error of her ways and say sorry. _How could I have been so stupid?_ The day only grew stranger as it wore on. However, the strangeness was more to her liking than a meeting with her mother. She and Remus had returned to the castle to find an empty common room.

* * *

_Rachael sat on the couch, draping her legs over the arm so that her head rested in the middle. Remus did the same on the other side. They had just returned from the hearing of their father's will. They were somewhat surprised to find an empty common room. They figured, however, that since it wasn't that late, maybe the Gryffindors were taking advantage of the remainder of their time in Hogsmeade. They did expect to see Sirius, Lily, James and Peter at the very least, but they were nowhere in the common room. _

_Rachael sighed and stared up at the ceiling._ "_Well… Dad's left us quite a bit," she said lazily, not caring in the least how much inheritance she was getting. _

"_Yeah," Remus agreed. "A good amount of galleons… Not that we really need it right now. We've got enough at Gringott's." He moved his hand to scratch the side of his neck, but decided against it. "You know, I really hate this," he spat. _

"_Same here," Rachael muttered. "But what can we do about it?"_

"_Nothing… But why us? That's what I want to know. Why us?"_

"_What d'you mean? Why we have to have a lunatic for a mother and then our father goes and dies on us?"_

"_Exactly! What did we ever do to deserve this? Having a mother who's been touched in the head so many times she's got a dent in it." _

_Rachael smiled slightly._ "_There's one way to put it. Look, can't we just forget about it for now? You know Dad wouldn't want us doing this to ourselves." _

_Remus sighed and shook his head._ "_Yeah, you're right. So… how was Hogsmeade?"_

_Rachael hesitated before answering, not sure if she wanted Remus to know who they had run into. In the end, she just said she had fun. _

"_Good," Remus answered, sounding pleased._

"_You know, I found it a little strange that Sirius just wanted me to go with him. He loves going there with you guys, so you can stock up on all of your prank stuff. He had to drag me through Zonko's, instead." _

_Remus said nothing to this comment, which only made her feel as though he knew something she didn't. Curious, she questioned him about it. Remus said nothing again. He wasn't really sure how to say what he knew, and besides, he found pleasure in hearing his sister nag him. Eventually, he caved in and decided to answer her question. _

"_Well, you know Sirius really cares about you," he said vaguely. _

_Rachael rolled her eyes. He couldn't have been more obvious if he tried. She had known that ever since they became friends. _

"_Obviously," she snarled. "We're best friends, why wouldn't he?"_

"_No, I mean _really_ cares about you."_

"_Like brother and sister, you mean?" _

_Remus rolled his eyes._ "_Okay, Rachael, you're not _this_ naïve. You've said best friend and sister. What else is there?" _

_Rachael thought for a minute, not quite sure what her brother was referring to. Her eyes widened slightly. She knew what he was talking about. Sitting up, she turned and looked over her brother._

"_You're kidding, right?" she asked. _

_Remus smiled and shook his head. _"_He told me himself." _

"_Okay this is weird…I've always thought of Sirius as my best friend, third to you and Lily. How long ago did he tell you this?" _

_Remus looked up considerately for a mere moment before sitting up and turning to her. _

"_Oh, I've known for a _long_ time," he replied, putting a particular emphasis on the word long. "And if you want my advice, I'd say you should go and talk to him." _

_Rachael nodded, sliding off the couch and glancing around the common room. She knew she would have to go and find him. The trouble was that she didn't know where he was. Her first place to look was the boys' dormitory. When she reached the top of the steps she peered through the doorway and found him sitting on his bed, reading a book. He didn't look up when she came into the room. _

_She stood in the entryway, feeling slightly awkward, as she had hardly ever been in the boys' dormitory. The most she had ever been in there was to check her brother's calendar or to retrieve an item one of the boys had borrowed from her. Looking around and realising Sirius was far too immersed in the book to look up, she took the liberty of knocking on the door. He snapped the book closed on his finger and looked over, smiling when he saw whom it was. _

"_Look who it is," he mumbled, placing his bookmark in the book and setting it down on the foot of his bed. "How's it going?" he asked, hopping off his bed and walking towards her. _

_She shrugged._

"_Okay, I guess," she replied halfheartedly. Truthfully, she was still confused about what her brother had just told her and of course there was her father…_

_He nodded and walked around the room as if looking for something._

"_You need anything?" he asked from over his shoulder. _

"_Remus was just telling me something kind of interesting," she said quickly, taking the plunge before she chickened out. _

_He nodded, stooping down next to his nightstand and opening the drawer. He shuffled through the various items inside, before shutting it and turning to face her._ _"What was it?"_

"_About why you went to Hogsmeade with just me." _

_Unless her eyes were cheating her, Rachael could have sworn she saw Sirius's face turn slightly red. When he spoke his voice was a little strained. "Oh… and what did Remus say?"_

"_Well… because… you really… care about me… more than a friend, as he put it."_

"_Well… you're my friend, I do care about you. I guess Remus is right."_

"_He said he heard it from you, so wouldn't he be right?"_

"_Not unless he purposely heard wrong." _

_Rachael shook her head slightly and raised her eyebrow. "So, Remus is lying?" she questioned. _

_Sirius shook his head quickly before she misunderstood him more than she did. "No," he said, still shaking his head. "No, he's not lying at all. What he said is true. Really true." _

_Rachael looked at him. She wasn't quite sure what to say after that._ _"You know, we've been best friends since first year, this is kind of awkward." _

_Sirius ran a hand through his hair and laughed a little._ _"You're telling me." He sighed and folded his arms across his chest. "Look, I don't know why Remus brought this up now of all times… I'm not trying to take advantage of you or anything because you're still upset about your dad. I'm just letting you know that I'm always here for you."_

"_I know you are. You don't have to remind me." _

_Sirius stood up from his spot at the nightstand and walked over to her._ "_I know I don't have to remind you," he said. "I just keep feeling like I have to remind myself for some reason." _

_He wavered for a minute, thinking to himself that it was now or never. Using every gut and nerve he had, he put his arm around her waist and his hand under her chin. He slowly pulled her close to him, kissing her gently on the lips. Shocked though she was, Rachael didn't object. She seemed to be blissfully unaware of anything else, until she found herself embarrassed to hear a round of cheers coming from the doorway. She and Sirius broke apart and turned to see James, Remus and Peter's heads sticking into the room, all three of them cheering Sirius on. _

"_Go Sirius!" James said, clapping his hands until Peter hit him over the head._

_Sirius looked over at them and raised his eyebrow pointedly. It took James a few minutes to process what his friend was telling him and, in result, Remus and Peter had to drag him back down to the common room. Sirius listened as their footsteps quickly died away and turned back to Rachael, whose face was now a dangerous shade of red. _

"_They're crazy, aren't they?" he asked. She nodded wholeheartedly. He shook his head as he thought about their ovation, but ended up shaking the thought right out of his mind. Taking a deep breath, he ran a hand through her hair and whispered (so as to not make the three return),_

"_I love you." _

* * *

Rachael looked around, finding her eyes slightly out of focus and wistful as she dwelled on this memory. She shook her head and realised that she was alone in the room. Lily had apparently gone upstairs, as she didn't hear the shower running. She slowly got out off her bed and took a glance out the window to see a freshly fallen layer of snow. That was good. The two of them would have something to do that day rather than just staying in the house.

Yawning and rubbing her head, Rachael ascended the stairs and entered the kitchen to see a fully dressed Lily eating lunch. Mrs. Evans was busy reading the newspaper, while Mr. Evans and Petunia were nowhere to be seen.

"Good morning," said a pleasant Lily upon noticing her friend.

Rachael smiled drowsily and took a seat at the table.

"Morning," she replied.

Lily swallowed her bite of sandwich and leaned back in her chair for a second before saying, "I saw you were up before, but you looked like you might nod off again, so I left you."

"Nah, you should've woke me up. I was having a bad… daydream I guess you can call it."

"What about?"

"Nothing… just stuff." Rachael jerked her head slightly towards Mrs. Evans and Lily immediately got the message. This was one subject she didn't want to bring up in front of her mother. Rachael twiddled with her thumbs, thinking about something she wanted to do for a while, and now she had the chance. She wasn't very far from the orphanage and she had a strange desire to go visit Ms. Marshall and Becky. That is, if Becky was still there and they hadn't gotten rid of Ms. Marshall. The first few weeks after she'd left the orphanage, she wrote to Becky and promised she would visit. She just never got around to it.

The only problem was that she wasn't able to ask Mrs. Evans if she could go without getting questions she couldn't answer in return. So, she turned to Lily instead. "Lily?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think we could go somewhere this week? You know, somewhere I haven't been in a _long _time…"

Lily looked at her friend, confused for a minute before realising what she was alluding to and nodded in response. She would be able to take her friend to the orphanage on Thursday at the latest, but for today - "Come on, I know what we can do."

* * *

"I can't believe you never went sledding before!" Lily shouted as she dragged her friend up a snowy hillside.

Rachael panted and glared up at her friend, getting somewhat annoyed at Lily's disbelief. It did seem very possible to her for a person to have never gone sledding. "Yeah, well, I never got around to it! Give me a break," she defended, feeling her headache come back as she climbed the last few feet to the top.

Lily didn't say anything; however, she just shook her head and dropped the sled down in the snow. "Now, even though you've _never been sledding,_ tell me you at least know what to do?"

"Of course I do, I'm not an idiot."

"Then you go first."

Rachael backed up and quickly shook her head. She did not feel like going down a steep hill on nothing more than a long piece of wood.

"No, that's all right, you go first," she offered, moving over to the log behind her. "I'll watch."

"You sure? Well, okay, then."

Rachael rested on the log while Lily jumped down on the sled and went down the hill alarmingly fast, going straight towards a grove of trees. Rachael made to stand up, in case she needed to go pull Lily away from them, but Lily stopped the sled in time and dragged it back up for another ride. Lily was quite a sight to watch. Every time she went down the hill she would emit a high-pitched shriek of delight, which she masked as a shriek of terror just to scare her friend. It did work the first couple of times she did it, but it lost its affect after the tenth time.

Rachael wished she could join Lily in her fun, but her headache was preventing her from doing much else except sitting on a log and watching. Even though she was having fun, she felt a little bored. She chose to go on the next ride when Lily offered it to her. But Lily was taking her time getting up the hill and it looked like she would be waiting some time before she got her chance. Shivering slightly as the winds increased, Rachael sat down on the log and watched lazily as snow began drifting towards the earth. She was actually glad Lily had suggested going sledding for the day; it helped her take her mind off things that had plagued her thoughts the night before.

She laughed when she saw Lily's head begin to emerge from the bottom of the hill, only to vanish quickly as the sled slid back down the hill. She heard Lily's surprised cry and went over to see if she was okay. Lily was all right, though she was covered in a mound of snow and was cursing under her breath.

"It's cold!" she cried when she spotted her friend.

"It's snow. What do you expect?"

Lily shook her head and carefully pulled the sled back up the hill and handed it over to Rachael. "Now, you remember what to do?" Lily asked, suddenly adopting the voice of a drill sergeant. "You slowly lean over the front and gently let yourself go. Now, if you think you're going to crash into the tree you –"

"Lily! I know what to do."

Rachael leaned forward on the sled and let herself go down the snowy slope, feeling the excitement as the snow whipped across her face as she caught more and more speed. As she sped down the hill, she realised she was stupid for declining the offer to go first. This was how she wanted to spend the rest of her winter days, speeding down a hill and able to forget all of her troubles. She could let the billowing wind wipe them all away as she got closer and closer to the grove of trees.

However, as soon as she spotted the trees her headache came back in full force, taking her completely by surprise. Closing her eyes and holding her hand up to her head for a minute to try and suppress the pain, she wasn't able to stop the sled in time and the bow of the sled hit the tree trunk with full force and sent her smacking up against it. Sparks shooting in her eyes, she was knocked unconscious the very second her forehead hit the tree trunk. She fell backwards, half her body on the sled, the other half in the snow, not moving an inch.

The second Lily saw Rachael lose control of the sled, she burst out laughing. She thought the entire act was a joke, as Rachael had cut her explanation of stopping short. She continued laughing, until she saw the sled bang against the tree. Then her laughter turned to a gasp when she saw Rachael fall backwards and stay in that position. She ran down the hill and dropped down next to the unconscious form of her friend and gently shook her in hopes that she would wake up. On Rachael's forehead was a large cut from the bark and it was slowly beginning to seep blood and a large bruise surrounded the cut and her nose was bleeding a bit.

Shaking her even more, she said, "Come on, this isn't funny! Wake up!"

But Rachael didn't respond to the movement. Her head merely lolled from side to side and she stayed unresponsive while Lily looked around for help. The area of the park they were in was one that was rarely visited and she doubted a person would walk by for a good half hour. By then she wasn't sure if Rachael would still be okay. Squinting into the clearing, she saw the faint outline of a portly figure that was taking a stroll around the edge of the trees. Squinting harder, she was able to recognise the figure as Vernon Dursley's (Petunia's boyfriend) sister, Marge.

"Just my luck," she whispered bitterly. If Marge was the only person left on Earth Lily still wouldn't chance leaving her best friend with her. But there was no one else around. She had no other choice. "Marge!" she called out. The figure of Marge stopped and looked around for the source of the voice. She looked through the trees and saw Lily waving at her. "I need help! Please!"

Marge hesitated for a moment before reluctantly approaching Lily with a questioning look.

"What do _you_ want?" she snarled.

"She hit her head on the tree," Lily explained, gesturing down to Rachael. "I need to get to my house to call an ambulance and I can't leave her here by herself. Just watch her until I get back. Please?"

"Fine, but hurry! I've got places to be."

Lily didn't waste any time getting from the park to her house. Sprinting faster than she had ever sprinted before, Lily ran through the front door of her house in a matter of three minutes and saw her mum and dad in the kitchen. Her mum looked up, bewildered when she saw Lily out of breath and an intensely worried look in her eyes.

"Lily?" she asked, utterly perplexed. "What's wrong?"

"Rachael… we were sledding… she hit a tree! She's not moving and we need an ambulance!"

Mrs. Evans stood up and went for the phone straightaway, while Mr. Evans asked his daughter who she had left her with.

"Marge is with her," Lily answered quickly, wanting her mum to hurry up on the phone.

Mr. Evans gave his daughter a sceptical look and led Lily out of the front door, grabbing his coat and hat in the process. "She would've been better off by herself."

* * *

The ambulance ride was a quick one, as there was no traffic at all with the growing weather conditions. Even if there had been traffic the ambulance was able to manoeuver its way through. The Evans followed close by in their station wagon, all of them nervous and anxious about what damage had been inflicted upon Rachael. The doctors didn't think it was anything too serious, from what they could see from running some tests in the ambulance. They just needed to make sure they were right.

The ambulance skidded to a halt in the Emergency Room entrance, while the Evans pulled their car into the main parking lot and went to the waiting room as instructed. Mr. Evans went over to the front desk while Lily and Mrs. Evans took a seat behind an aquarium full of tropical fish. Lily sunk back in her seat, looking around the waiting room apprehensively. She hoped the doctors were right when they said no serious damage had been caused. From watching Rachael crash into the tree, it looked as though severe harm could have been imposed.

She waited patiently for her dad to finish filling out some papers the receptionist had given him. She waited even more patiently for the doctors to come out. Her dad did wander over eventually, looking a bit disconcerted, however, when he sat down next to his wife. Lily looked at him curiously, wondering what was making him look like that. As if reading his daughter's mind, Mr. Evans merely said,

"I'm just worried. What if her mother takes this the wrong way and says we weren't responsible with her daughter?"

Lily shook her head slowly, hating herself for doing it, but knowing that if anyone would understand this, it would be her parents. Mr. Evans nodded at Lily, signaling for her to explain.

"Her mum would be happy if she found out Rachael got hurt." Mr. and Mrs. Evans exchanged perplexed glances. The both of them were thinking the same thing - why would her mother be happy? What parent could possibly be elated at the news of their child being injured and in the hospital? "Her mum doesn't like her very much," Lily explained. "She blamed Rachael for an accident she and her brother were in when they were eight and she disowned her. She's taken her anger out on her at least once. If you told her that she was in the hospital, she would think you two are gods or something."

Mr. and Mrs. Evans were shocked upon hearing this. How could a mother disown her child and take her anger out on her, as well? It was unreal to them. They were two people who had always tried to be kind to their children. This news quickly eliminated Mrs. Evans plan of calling Mrs. Lupin in Romania (where they now strongly doubted she was) and telling her what had happened. Lily would probably be right and she would most likely congratulate them. The very thought sickened the both of them.

An hour later, after several tests and x-rays, the doors to the emergency room opened and Rachael came out, quickly followed by one of the doctors from the ambulance. Rachael had been supplied with an icepack and was holding it against her forehead, all the while closing her eyes in pain. The doctor led her over to where the Evans were sitting and moved a stack of magazines over so she could sit down.

"She seems to be alright," the doctor said, a tone of relief evident in his voice. "She will be experiencing some strong headaches for the next few days, but nothing too serious. And she will have to come back for another checkup to see if she's recovered. Other than that, she can leave whenever you're ready to go."

"Thank you, sir," said Mrs. Evans as the doctor retreated back through the emergency room doors. Lily got up from her seat and went to sit down next to Rachael, wanting to tell her what she had told her parents an hour before. But she never got the chance, as her parents had taken the job right out of her hands.

"Rachael," said Mr. Evans unhurriedly and cautiously. "Lily told us something while you were in the emergency room." Rachael nodded her head to let him know she was listening and he could continue. "We were planning on informing your mother about this… But, from what Lily told us, it seems like that would do no good."

Rachael raised an eyebrow at her friend. _She told them?_ "She told you what my mum did to me?" she asked quietly. "That she disowned me?"

"Yes," replied Mrs. Evans. "But, if you don't mind us asking, what did you do?"

"It's nothing I'm at liberty to tell. It's my brother's business, not mine."

"Well," disrupted Lily, wanting this conversation to end before they got into it any further. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay, just a really bad headache."

"Well, when we get home you can take a nap. It'll make your head feel better," Mrs. Evans offered. "Now, let's leave. Hospitals aren't the best of places to be."

* * *

Mrs. Evans idea of taking a nap did have a positive effect on the searing pains in Rachael's head. Her head still throbbed, but a mite less than it had at the hospital. The moment she walked to the front door, she hurried to the basement and fell right to sleep on her cot. Lily, on the other hand, stayed awake to think the day over. She wondered if she had done the right thing by telling her parents what she had told them. She wasn't in any position to disclose that information. But what else could she have done? Her dad was frightened that Mrs. Lupin would take legal action if she found out what happened. Lily needed to tell him there wasn't anything to worry about, and she needed to back that up with a reason.

She had talked it over with her mother once she was sure Rachael was asleep. Mrs. Evans agreed with her. She thought that they needed to know what was going on. They were getting a little suspicious, since Rachael was so distant when she explained where her mother was. If she hadn't told them, they would have kept wondering and would have gotten nowhere. She knew that Rachael might be upset about it for a little, but, in the end, she would thank her friend for telling. There were only so many people who could know, and now they were two of them.

So, Lily didn't feel too guilty anymore. Though she still didn't feel completely innocent, especially after she told her mum where Rachael wanted to visit. Rachael wanted to visit the orphanage she had lived in, which was why she didn't ask Mrs. and Mr. Evans. Mrs. Evans agreed to visit the orphanage the next day when Rachael was feeling a little better. Although, she did have a little trouble comprehending as to why she would want to visit there again.

"Did you ever have one of those dreams where things keep repeating themselves?" Lily and Mrs. Evans looked around and saw Rachael coming into the kitchen. They both nodded at her question. "I kept dreaming that I was crashing into a tree… made me feel better though."

Lily laughed and gestured to a seat at the table, which Rachael gratefully took. Lily took a seat beside her and said, "Tomorrow you can visit the orphanage if you want. My mum said it was alright."

"Okay… yeah, I'll go tomorrow." She laughed slightly and added, "It'll probably scare the daylights out of Ms. Marshall to see me though."

* * *

Mr. Evans stopped the old station wagon right in front of an aged, white, three-story building. Rachael hadn't seen it for three years and at first glance she saw nothing about its presence had changed, on the outside at least. She only wondered what changes could have taken place inside while she was gone. Stepping out of the car, she looked at the railing with the chipped paint in the front of the building. She distinctly remembered the last day she had lived here, when she was sitting on it waited for the cab to take her to the train station. Ms. Marshall had told her their doors were always open to her. This seemed as good a time as any to take her up on that offer.

Mr. Evans said he would come back in an hour and a half for her, to give her some time to look around and talk with old friends. Rachael nodded and thanked him for the ride. She waited until his car was safely around the corner of the street before walking up to the front door and ringing the bell. Tapping her foot patiently, the door opened only two minutes after she had rung. Standing in the doorway, was an aged woman with a kind face. It was one of the first faces she had met seven years ago, when her father left her here with Mrs. Ramben. She was standing face to face with none other than Ms. Marshall, her old "personal instructor."

"Ms. Marshall?" she asked uncertainly, not sure if she would remember her.

The old woman looked at her for a moment, as though she was trying to place her. When she realised who was standing in the doorway, her face broke into a small grin. "Rachael Lupin?" she replied disbelievingly. She had never expected her to come back once she left.

"Yes?" She was beginning to get uncomfortable with the one to two word answers.

"What brings you here?"

"Well, I was in the area… I'm staying at my friend's house for the holidays and I thought I'd come here to visit."

Ms. Marshall smiled and stepped aside for Rachael to come in. "I guess you took me up on the offer that our doors were always open for you," Ms. Marshall said cheerfully.

Rachael nodded, happy and surprised to see Ms. Marshall in such a good mood. When she had lived at the orphanage, it was extremely rare for this ever to happen. Ms. Marshall led her through the familiar common room and down the corridor that led to the room she had once shared with Becky Beckham. She wondered how much the room changed since she left it. She only remembered it to have bunk beds and yellow walls. She doubted Becky would've rearranged it much.

They stopped at Room 35 and Ms. Marshall knocked on the door. From inside the room they could hear the voice of Becky say, "Who's there?" Ms. Marshall responded, saying that she had a surprise for her. This got Becky's attention and the door flew open within seconds. Standing in the doorway was a blonde haired, blue-eyed girl of fifteen, who hadn't changed much from her twelve year old self. When she stepped backwards into her room, she saw Rachael and her eyes lit up.

"Rachael Lupin?" she said in the same tone Ms. Marshall had used.

Rachael nodded and joking said in the same voice, "Becky Beckham?"

Becky laughed shortly and stepped aside so Rachael could walk in. After being away from this room for three years and having the girls' dormitory for a home, she found it wasn't much different than it had been. The walls were still yellow. She could see through the space in the door that the closet was still full to capacity. The only thing that seemed to have changed was there was a single bed instead of bunk beds. Ms. Marshall left the room, saying she had to talk to Ms. Ramben about important matters, and left the girls to themselves.

"So," said Becky, sitting down on her bed. "How've you been?"

"Pretty good," Rachael answered, leaning against the wall. "Spending the holidays with my friend from school. Are you doing anything for Christmas?"

Becky nodded, somewhat enthusiastically.

"Ms. Ramben decided to get all the older kids tickets to see A Christmas Carol at the theatre. So, I'm going to go."

"Sounds fun. I'd rather be at the theatre than at my friend's house with a sore head for days on end." Becky raised an eyebrow, signaling she didn't know what her former roommate was talking about. "I've learnt that sledding, trees, and I aren't that great of friends," she explained carelessly, gesturing to the cut on her forehead. "Went sledding yesterday and let's say a certain tree trunk and I got to know each other better."

Becky laughed slightly and took a look around the room.

"Are you, Brenda, and Brandy getting along any better? Or are they still as stuck as they were three years ago?"

"They've gotten worse if you can believe it," Becky grimaced, suddenly looking bitter. This expression gave Rachael the impression that something bad had happened between the three of them. Their relationship hadn't been the greatest when she left, but it hadn't been so bad that it would bring that kind of appearance on Becky. Faintly inquisitive, she almost asked if anything had happened, but she restrained herself. She didn't want to go prying around in someone else's business, especially if it involved a fight with someone who was your good friend.

Becky, however, wasn't the least bit hesitant in disclosing this information. She explained it in little detail how Brenda and Brandy started making up nasty rumors about Becky with no reason to do it and they were circulated around the entire orphanage. The rumors were so nasty that the entire orphanage made fun of her for three weeks and therefore ended the friendship that was once known as The Three B's. Rachael wasn't the least bit shocked that those two would have done something like that. They were always capable of it. It was only a matter of time before they would actually execute it. What did surprise her was that they did it to Becky. Becky was their leader, their role model and for them to do that to her was definitely astonishing.

"Well, friends do tend to do that you," Rachael added, thinking of Sirius and what he did to her. But, shaking the thought out of her mind, she continued listening to Becky's tale of how she hadn't seen them for weeks and how they were supposedly adopted. Rachael found that extremely hard to believe, considering the circumstances. First of all, no one who ever visited the orphanage adopted someone over five. Brenda and Brandy were well over five. Second of all, why would any adopt them in the first place? A person looking for a child would want someone sweet and lovable, not two girls who were self absorbed and nasty.

"Those are only rumors, right?" Rachael asked concernedly. "I mean… no one in their right mind would subject themselves to that kind of torture. Here you can get away from them, but at your house there's no escape."

"I hope they're only rumors," Becky agreed. "But I think they're true, since I haven't seen them in ages and at school they've been marked absent for a lot of days."

Rachael shook her head disgustedly. _What human with a functioning brain would do that to himself? That's madness._

The two spent the rest of the hour talking over the past three years and how each other had spent them. Rachael told her how she and her brother were living at their school with the Headmaster over the break. Becky didn't understand how someone could actually stay at school all year round on their own free will, but Rachael said it was better than most people thought it would be. Rachael learned that the important matters that Ms. Marshall had mentioned were actually plans to stop the orphanage from closing. With all of the orphans getting older than the normal adopting age and no new ones coming in, they were running out of money to keep the building open.

If the building did close that meant that everyone who wasn't old enough to live on their own (which meant they weren't eighteen or older) would be sent to foster homes until they could find a job for themselves and a home. Becky would be one of the orphans that got sent to a foster home. As she was only fifteen, she had no means of getting a job to support herself. If the orphanage closed that meant all of the administration would be out of work, and Ms. Marshall was too old to enter a regular job, she was nearing the retirement age. Everyone would be at a loss as to what to do with their lives if the building closed.

"You're lucky you left when you did," Becky said sullenly. "All the problems started a little while after that. The money just started disappearing as people became less interested in us."

"No one wants to adopt someone just because of their age?" Rachael asked angrily, even though she knew that was the top reason why no one was getting adopted. "That's ridiculous. People should be grateful that they wouldn't have to raise them from infancy."

"Well, that's just the thing," Becky said quickly. "People want to raise an orphan from birth or a young age because then it wouldn't be so difficult. They figure we'll be rebellious if they don't." Becky sighed and shook her head. "It's really stupid, but that's the way it goes and we've all learned to accept it."

"You shouldn't accept it if that's what's going to happen. You should put up a fight or something. Why go to a foster home without a fight?"

"Well, I wish Ms. Ramben had your attitude. She's just letting it all happen. She doesn't care how many kids go somewhere they don't want to be and how many people she puts out of work. She just cares that she's getting a nice profit."

"Then she's even worse than the people who are buying this place."

* * *

Mr. Evans came, as he said, an hour and a half after he dropped her off and brought her back to the Evans' house. The car ride back was a very quiet one, as Mr. Evans still felt a little guilty about his topic of conversation at dinner two nights ago. Rachael was too busy ruminating over what she and Becky had discussed. She just couldn't believe the orphanage was going to be sold and everyone there was going to be sent to different places, probably never to see each other again. She had never really liked Ms. Ramben. But she had always respected her for being able to open an institution for kids with no place to go when their parents died or just didn't want them. Now she had about as much respect for her as she did for her own mother, and that meant it was nonexistent.

She was disgusted at the people more than she was at the orphanage administration. She was disgusted that people would refuse to take on a child just because of their age. This child could be well-behaved, intelligent, funny and sweet, but just because they were over five they could no longer have a home. It just wasn't fair and, even though she knew a lot of things weren't fair, she just didn't think people could actually do such things. It sickened her.

They pulled into the driveway, where she saw that Lily was sitting on the porch, lazily flipping some rocks into a rose bush across from her. Lily looked up when she heard the car engine and smiled, dismissing her rock throwing activity.

"How was your visit?" she asked her friend inquiringly.

"Oh… it was fine… They remembered me; I remembered them, nothing too spectacular."

"You sure? You sound like something bad happened."

"No, nothing bad happened. It's an orphanage, what bad thing could possibly happen. You know, I think I'm going to go sit down for a while, my head hurts again." And before Lily could stop her, she raced up the steps and down to Lily's room.

* * *

On Christmas morning Rachael was awakened to the sound of Lily singing "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" in a loud and purposely annoying voice. She was letting all the high notes screech high enough to shatter glass. This was her idea of a wakeup call on a holiday, acting like an eager five year old that couldn't wait until nine o' clock to open her gifts. Rachael snatched her pillow and held it tightly over her head in hopes that it would block out the sound. To her misfortune, however, Lily merely ripped the pillow up and sang even louder in her ear.

"I give up!" Rachael yelled, pulling her sheet up and waving the white flag of surrender. "Just spare me a hearing aid!" Lily laughed triumphantly and pulled the sheets off her friend and proceeded to drag her up the stairs. "Jeez! Are you always like this on Christmas?"

"Of course I am!" Lily said, taking her friend's question as an insult.

Rachael rolled her eyes and continued to be dragged up the stairs, stumbling over nearly all of them, as Lily was moving at the quickest speed she could. Rachael didn't understand why she was so eager to get up there; it wasn't like the presents were going anywhere. Then again, this was Lily, the girl who was always excited to get something – whatever it may be.

Finally reaching the top of the stairs, only after Rachael tripped and brought Lily down with her, they reached the living room and saw a large pile of colourfully wrapped gifts under the brightly lit Christmas tree. Mr. and Mrs. Evans, along with Petunia, were already sitting in the living room, obviously having been woken up by Lily's inhuman singing. They gave her a glare as she walked by, but quickly forgot about their alarm and began passing out presents.

Rachael enjoyed watching them open their gifts, as Lily made a huge fuss every time she got something she really wanted or she was surprised by it. She didn't know whether she always did that, or if she was just doing that to act stupid, either way it was funny. She was surprised to see that she had gotten presents as well. She didn't think that she would, since she wasn't at Hogwarts like she always was. But all of her friend's owls had managed to find her and she found that she had a decent pile of presents in front of her. James's owl had brought her two presents, one from James and one from Remus. Peter had managed to find an unfamiliar owl and sent something. Lily's owl didn't need to go anywhere at all to deliver the gift.

Christmas at the Evans' house was much different from Hogwarts, and by different that meant celebrated at a much larger scale. They had relatives from both sides of the family, friends from the neighbourhood, tons and tons of food, a truckload of gifts, and loud holiday music. It was a marvel that so many people and things could fit in the house at once. Rachael and Lily spent most of their time with Lily's cousin, Marie, who was older than them by a year, but proved to be just as childish as Lily was.

Christmas dinner was even better than the House Elves'. Mrs. Evans made every food imaginable, which was a lot in comparison to how much the relatives brought. Rachael and Lily were beside themselves and managed to eat three helpings of everything, even the stuff they didn't like. _This must be what Christmas in the house does to you._

* * *

Time for the end of the break came too quickly for Rachael's liking. She had grown fond of staying at the Evans' and didn't want to go back to her humdrum life at school. Reluctantly, she packed up her bags on the last night of the break and, even more reluctantly, dragged them down the stairs when they had to go catch the train. They were nearly late on their arrival at King's Cross, but managed to get to the train just as it was pulling out of the platform.

They walked down the train for about five minutes before they discovered Remus, James and Peter in a compartment, discussing their breaks. They sat with them and immediately joined in the conversation. They listened to James and Remus as they unraveled their tale of Christmas dinner mischief. James and Remus were feeling a little restless and decided to stir up some trouble, which meant that the entire dining room was filled with the frogspawn they had gotten at Zonko's Joke Shop. Everyone was startled for a minute before they saw James and Remus looking through the doorway in the hall. Mrs. Potter shook her head and took away the two plates she out for them, which caused an uproar on the boys' part. They did get their dinner back, only after they had to chase down every frog that escaped the dining room.

Lily and Rachael didn't go into too much detail about their Christmas, as there wasn't anything as spectacular as rabid frogs. They did mention things that were worth mentioning, such as the tree. They spent the rest of their train ride playing Exploding Snap, which of course Remus won. They didn't have the faintest idea of why they played it. They just assumed they liked to see themselves lose.

The Hogwarts Express pulled into Hogsmeade station just as the sun was setting and casting its pinkish glow over the sky. Lily and Rachael got out and hurried to get their things to avoid the rush of students who were taking their time and clogging up the platform. They found their trunks under a gigantic pile of Slytherin trunks and pulled them out, not being too careful at keeping the Slytherin trunks in place. On their way back to the castle, they saw out of the corner of their eyes Sirius and Marilyn talking. Rachael slowed her pace and observed them inconspicuously, so they wouldn't be able to accuse her of spying. She fixed her attention on the tree above them, already with the excuse that she was watching the bird on it. She listened carefully, trying to catch as much of the conversation as possible. Except what she heard she wasn't sure if she should take as good news or bad news.

"I feel really bad about what I did," said Sirius in his most sincere voice.

Marilyn merely scoffed at his words. "Why should you feel bad? It wasn't like she had a right to get all upset at you. Did she ever say you couldn't see someone else?" she questioned harshly, her eyes flaming somewhat.

"Well, no… she never said that, and since she didn't say that… I really didn't do anything wrong, _technically_."

"That's right, technically."

"But what about you and Remus? Do you realise how bad you made him feel?"

"Not as bad as you made her feel, I bet."

"Still… He's not mad anymore I don't think. But if you apologise to him, I'll apologise to her."

Marilyn didn't say anything. She simply nodded her head and walked off with no intentions of doing as she was told. Sirius watched her leave and looked around for any signs of Rachael, who quickly vacated the scene once their conversation was over. She and Lily hurried through the large double doors and up to Gryffindor Tower, eager to dispose of their trunks in the dormitory.

A few minutes after, Rachael went down into the empty common room, leaving Lily to finish some homework. Once she got to the bottom step, she discovered that the common room wasn't completely empty. It held just a single occupant, who was watching her from the couch. Sirius was sitting on the couch, looking at her expectantly, thinking she was going to say something to him. She wouldn't, though; she turned on her heel and attempted to run back upstairs.

"Please, don't go upstairs," he said, just loud enough for her to hear. She hesitated for a moment, but still kept moving. "Please, I want to talk to you."

She was considering going back upstairs, but Sirius actually sounded desperate, and it was only on rare occasions that he sounded like that. Sighing in defeat, she retreated from the steps and took a seat on one of the armchairs.

"What about?" she asked dully, pretending she didn't already know.

"About what happened before the holiday. I feel really bad about what I did."

"You should feel bad."

"Look, I know what I did was stupid and –"

"What you did was incredibly stupid."

"Will you stop interrupting me?"

"No. Everything you're saying right now is what I told you then. Why would you just go and kiss _her_? Of all people, it had to be _her_, the girl I can't stand and the girl who was going out with Remus, who, by the way, isn't really over that."

Sirius groaned in frustration. Why wasn't she listening to him? Why was she being so stubborn that she refused to listen to his explanation, which he intended to turn into an apology? He wanted to apologise ever since he did it. He hadn't been able to think up something to say. And now that he had something to say, she wouldn't listen to him. He had thought she would listen.

"Why are you being so darn stubborn?" he burst out, not meaning to say that.

"I'm being stubborn because you're probably apologising just to get it out of your head. You probably don't mean it!"

This made him mad.

"What are you talking about? How could you say that I'm apologising but don't really mean it? I'm not that shallow! I'm saying I'm sorry because I mean it and I care about you almost as much as I care about my best friend! And you know me and James, which means I care about you a lot! I don't understand what you're not getting. Isn't sorry enough? I am really, truly, deeply sorry about what I did and I would never do it again!"

"To coin a cliché, how do I know you're not going to do it again? You could if you wanted to so how do I know you won't? You made me feel horrible. You, of all people, made me feel like absolutely nothing. How do I know you won't do that again?"

"You want to know why I won't do it again?"

She nodded, glaring dangerously at him. Sirius put an arm around her neck and kissed her. He pulled away from her and in the most heartfelt voice he could, he said,

"I wouldn't do it again because I love you, Rachael Lupin, and that's all there is to it."


	39. My Daughter

Chapter Thirty Nine  
My Daughter  
The Summer of 1996

"Don't ask questions, just trust me. I know what I saw. Why would I lie to you about something like this?"

"I know you wouldn't lie, it's just highly unlikely that you've found her. She's been gone for fifteen years. If you taught her three years ago, why didn't you realise who she was then? She's supposed to look a lot like I do, which also means she looks a lot like you."

"I wasn't sure if I was just imagining things. If you heard the things she told me you would know it's her too. That's not all; the Healers sent the blood work results to us and her parents."

"Why would they send it to the Order?"

"It involves us. But that's beside the point. The point is, when they tested the blood it came up different from her parents' DNA. It came up with a makeup similar to yours. I know it's hard for you to believe, but I wouldn't lie about this. Just let me explain."

* * *

_Ding dong…_

Remus Lupin waited patiently at the front door of the Jameson house, looking around in the evening sky. It was not yet dark, but it was not too light either. This was how it went for the past two years. He would go to Harry's house first and then to Lily's house. Lily was a friend of Harry's who spent the summer at the Order of the Phoenix's headquarters, more commonly known as Number Twelve Grimmauld Place. It was going to be a tradition for only another year as they would be graduating after this year, but it was a nice tradition… especially after what had occurred after their fifth year. Remus still hadn't gotten over it yet. How could he? Sirius was his best friend and only two years after recovering him from Azkaban, after he was falsely accused of the murder of Lily and James Potter, he went away again and this time for good. The only person this had affected worse than him was Harry. Harry was putting up a good fight, however, and going on as if nothing had happened.

The door opened, revealing a middle-aged woman with blonde hair and green eyes. She was holding a dishtowel and looking at him oddly.

Remus cleared his throat and smiled politely. "I'm not sure if you remember me," he said awkwardly. "But I'm Professor Lupin, a former teacher at Hogwarts."

The woman studied him for a minute, trying to place him. When she realised who he was, she smiled and nodded. "Yes, I remember you, come in." She stepped aside and Remus stepped through the front door, only to hear the clattering of a plate and the squishing of what was supposed to be their dinner.

"Mum," came a hesitant voice from the kitchen. "I think Riley's dinner's alive. It jumped up at me."

Mrs. Jameson sighed and threw her towel down on the floor. "Lily, you didn't charm it, did you?" she asked the girl, now known as Lily, in the other room.

"Hey, I'm not getting expelled!" she yelled back defensively.

Mrs. Jameson shook her head and turned back to Remus. "Sorry, my son was trying to cook dinner," she explained, stooping down to pick up the towel. "Lily was bound to do something to it."

"I heard that," said Lily, once again. They then heard footsteps and a girl, who looked to have turned sixteen only a short while ago, entered. The girl was fairly tall, reaching about 5"6. She had sandy brown hair and bright blue eyes. She was holding what appeared to be a plate of their dinner, except it was devoid of any food. There was only sauce smeared all over it.

"Mum," Lily said, not noticing Remus standing beside her mother. "I swear, the dinner got up and walked off my plate! It grew _legs_!"

"Will you stop that!" her mother snapped.

Lily stepped back, shocked by her mother's snap, but quickly recovered when she saw a little meatball begin walking over the wooden floor towards them. Her mother and Remus gaped at it and Lily smirked triumphantly.

"Told you it was alive."

Mrs. Jameson kneeled down and cautiously flicked the meatball over. Under it was a rather large spider. Revolted, she hurried into the other room and came out with a shoe. She slammed it on the spider until it was good and dead. When she was finished, she cleaned the shoe and the mess on the floor up.

"It wasn't _alive_," she said to her daughter, who was still smirking.

"Yeah, well, I guess we all know what Riley's made the meatballs out of," she said, indifferent to her mother's comment. "Forgive me if I don't eat dinner tonight. Spiders are not part of my diet."

Mrs. Jameson shook her head and left the room. Remus looked around the room, before clearing his throat to catch the girl's attention. Lily jumped at the noise and jumped even more when she saw Professor Lupin standing behind her. She didn't realise he was going to come so soon this year. It was only two weeks after school had ended. She thought, considering the situation, he would've waited a little more before coming.

"Oh, hi Professor," she said pleasantly. "I didn't think you'd be coming so early."

"Well, Professor Dumbledore thought it best to get Harry away from the Dursleys as soon as possible," Remus explained with a hollow laugh. "So, I decided to come get you too."

She nodded slowly, listening as her mum cleaned up the mess in the kitchen. "Well, I'm not packed at all," she confessed. "I can pack quickly though, once I find everything."

He nodded and asked if he could be of any help. She shook her head and dashed up the flight of stairs leading towards the end of the hallway, where there was yet another flight of stairs leading to her room.

Lily's room was actually the old attic, which they had converted into a bedroom five years ago when her mother was supposed to be having another baby. Lily was going to have to share a room, but they figured it wasn't a good idea, as they knew she had all different kinds of magic supplies strewn around. So her dad had the idea to convert the attic into a separate bedroom for her. The baby only lived a short while, dying from respiratory complications. Lily was supposed to move back into her old room, but her mother refused, saying that it was going to serve as a memorial for Lily's little sister.

Her room was the largest in the house. As that the attic covered the entire building, she was able to have a big room. Directly across from the door was her bed, which held a dark blue comforter with a portrait of a crescent moon, embroidered on it. Her room contained her dresser, which held many knick-knacks. There was the cage that normally held her owl Sapphire in it. Sapphire, however, was out scavenging and the cage stood empty. She had many poster hung around her room, all of them showing off her favourite movies and bands, such as Star Wars, The Rolling Stones, Queen, and any Mel Brooks movie in creation. Her room was usually kept clean, being that she was only using it two months during the year. Now it was as messy as it could be. She knew, because of this, it would take her quite some time before she managed to recover everything she needed for school.

She stood in the doorway and looked around, trying to spot some of her school supplies in the mess. She did manage to spot her wand lying precariously on the edge of her dresser. She made her way carefully through the mess and retrieved it. Now she was on the search for her trunk so she could put the wand in it.

"Do you need any help?" Professor Lupin asked from the doorway.

Lily looked up at him, then down at her mess, and laughed. "I think we'll need tomb raiders to find everything in this mess," she answered, now spotting a spare bottle from her potion supplies.

"I think two people will do just fine," he replied, going on his own search for school items. He soon realised that she wasn't kidding. Looking at the mess reminded Remus slightly of his sister. She had never been one to keep a room, or anything for that matter, clean for long. He was used to looking through large messes to find little objects. The silence in the room, with the exception of the clunking of the objects on the floor, was rather uncomfortable, not to mention irritating, so Lily decided to strike up a conversation. However, the first thing that came to her mind wasn't the best.

"How are you feeling… since… well the end of last year," she asked as she found another textbook behind her bed.

Professor Lupin looked up, feeling slightly surprised at the question, even though he knew he shouldn't have been. He had not gotten over the fact that the last of his best friends was dead; but he didn't feel as bad as he did the first few days following the death.

"Better," he said, doing his best to smile.

She smiled back, as she nearly tripped over a bottle full of some substance she needed for Professor Snape's class. She hurriedly picked it up and placed it gently in her potion kit.

"I know I really have no right to say this," she said as she continued their search, which was nearing its end, "but for some reason I feel worse than I should about Sirius dying."

Remus looked up at her, confused for a second at what she was saying. "What do you mean?" he asked curiously.

"I dunno, really… It just feels like I lost my dad or something. It's crazy, but I can't help it."

Now Remus _was_ confused. She felt like she lost her dad? She had her own father. True her parents were divorced, but she did have one. So, why would she be saying that she felt like she lost him when Sirius died? She was right in saying it was crazy. Just because it was crazy, it didn't mean that it was false. That would mean… but how could it mean that?

"It's not that crazy," he said reasonably, though thinking to himself that it was crazy… and yet… "You and Sirius did talk quite a bit during the holidays. You're both similar to each other. Personality wise that is."

"So, it's not crazy that I feel like that?"

"Not crazy at all." But it _was_. How could it be that after all this time? Why hadn't he seen it before? He just shook his head, trying to clear the thoughts out of his mind. He knew it was impossible. It couldn't be and he didn't want to get his or anybody else's hopes up. Instead of saying anything else, he helped her find the last bit of her school supplies.

The sun was finished setting outside the window, and the full moon was just beginning to rise and brighten the dark night sky. Remus only managed to take a glance out the window in his search, when he spotted the moon. His heart stopped. How could he have forgotten it was a full moon? How could he have been so stupid? The only explanation was that he was still upset about Sirius and it had completely blocked the full moon out of his mind. Now, here he was, with one of his former students unaware of anything, while he was starting to undergo his change. He didn't know what to do. The pain was too much for him to yell for her to get out of the room. When Lily heard the groans of pain coming from him, she was too frightened to move.

His bones changed to unnatural lengths. Fur was sprouting out of every inch of his body. His facial features lengthened to a wolfish length and all the while he kept his cries of pain quiet. Lily just stood there, transfixed at the sight. She didn't know what to do, even though her first instinct should have been to run. Remus's transformation was over. Now, where her old professor should have been, was a grey wolf that was still whimpering in pain. She knew the whimpering would end soon. When it did the wolf, would start taking in its surroundings, and he would realise there was fresh meat right there for him to attack.

The werewolf did stop whimpering and, when it did, it did exactly as Lily thought it would do. It looked around the room, perplexed at the thought that he wasn't in the forest where he should be. Then, when he saw a scared girl only feet away from him, he forgot all about that. He had his dinner right there for him; he didn't need to hunt. The werewolf slowly made its way towards the girl, grinning wolfishly as she backed against the wall, not having any means of escaping.

Breathing heavily, Lily looked towards the door that the wolf was blocking. She wasn't going to escape, but she should get her mum and brother out.

"Mum, Riley, get out of the house!" she called out, fear greatly evident in her voice. "Don't come back 'till tomorrow!" She listened as her mum yelled up the stairs, asking what was wrong. "Professor Lupin's a werewolf! Tonight's a full moon! Just leave!" She heard her mother's footsteps coming up the stairs and she yelled even louder. "No! Go away! Don't come back!" She heard the footsteps hesitate for a minute. She knew her mum wasn't going to give up. She knew her mother was also terrified at the thought of a werewolf being in her house. "Mum! Get out of this house! I'm serious! I'll be fine!"

Her mum finally gave up, however grudgingly, her footsteps retreated from the stairs and the front door slammed shut.

Lily was relieved that her mum and brother were out of the house, but when she saw the werewolf one inch from her nose, her fear came back to her. She wished she would have run out of the room when she had the chance. But her chance was gone and she knew what the wolf was thinking. The wolf inched closer to her. She backed up against the wall as much as she could, but it was useless. The wolf bent down ready to inflict the fate determining bite. Then she got the idea to kick the wolf back. That was also worthless, as the wolf gripped her foot and bit down on it. She held her cry of pain in and saw the wolf was backing away, obviously pleased with itself. She took this opportunity to use her remaining strength to get out of the room. She slid down the stairs and made a mad dash for her mum's room, locking herself in. Once she knew she was safe in the room, she gave up her last bit of strength and allowed herself to black out.

* * *

"Mrs. Jameson, I can't tell you how sorry I am. I lost track of the days, I didn't realise –"

"It's okay, Professor."

"No, I should have been more responsible. Please, if there's anything I can do to make up for this, just tell me and I'll do it."

"The only thing I want you to do is to explain this to her. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have an appointment. My son will be up soon and when he does, you two are free to go to St. Mungo's and wherever you went last year… that headquarters place."

"I'll do that, and I'm really sorry."

The front door slammed shut, causing Lily (who was asleep in her mum's room after her mother picked the lock) to wake with a start. She looked around and wondered how she ended up in her mum's room. Then she saw her leg wrapped in a bloody bandage. She leaned back on her pillow and thought for a second, trying to think what might have happened that could have caused this. Then she remembered. Professor Lupin had forgotten it was a full moon; he'd bitten her.

Shaking her head, she carefully raised herself out of bed and set herself on one leg. She walked vigilantly down the stairs, wincing as she used her wounded leg. She saw Professor Lupin standing at the stove, apparently trying to cook breakfast. He looked up from his cooking and smiled when he saw her.

"Good morning," he said, in his most pleasant voice.

"Morning," she replied sitting down at the table. She looked lazily at the stove, only to see a mammoth cloud of black smoke emit from it. Professor Lupin broke out into a fit of coughs. He waved his hand vigorously through the smoke, in an attempt to get rid of it. Once the smoke had cleared, he took whatever he was cooking and placed it on a plate.

"I've never been much of a cook," he admitted as he placed two plates on the table and took a seat.

She looked at what appeared to be black bacon and tried to smile in thanks, but the smell of the burnt food was nauseating to her. Still, in her attempt to be well-mannered, she ate it with a forced grin and listened as Professor Lupin tried to make conversation. He tried beating around the bush before he had to tell her what Mrs. Jameson said he had to tell her.

"Are you avoiding something?" she asked as if reading his mind. "Because I already know what you're trying not to say."

He sighed, feeling defeated, and nodded.

"So, I have nothing to explain then," he said, feeling oddly relieved. "You know what happened. I'm so sorry; I should have kept track of the days. I completely forgot. I should have sent Tonks or Mad Eye here…"

"No, really… it's okay. I even saw it was a full moon before you came. I should've said something. I guess spiders carrying meatballs away make you forget these things. It's okay, I don't blame you."

Remus still felt that he had to say something. He had just condemned her to the worst fate a man could have, other than death. He wanted to assure her that it wasn't the worst thing in the world. He could almost tell she was thinking that by the way she kept glancing down at her injured leg. What could he say? She had already dismissed the subject and clearly didn't want to discuss apologies any further. Luckily, Remus didn't need to say anything because she began to talk again.

"I know it's a little weird, but I figure my mum might be mad at me because this happened," she said in an odd voice. "I mean, I know my mum knows that this isn't my fault or anyone else's really, but she might say that I should have known. 'You're always looking out that telescope of yours, you should have known.' Being interested in astronomy doesn't mean you have to always remember when a full moon is, right?"

Remus shook his head, again finding himself bewildered by the things she was telling him, how much they sounded like someone else he knew. Why was this happening? He wanted to convince himself that he was just imagining this. He couldn't deny the resemblance. She had an uncanny resemblance to the both of them. Maybe he was still shocked by what he had done. Perhaps it was reminding him of them. It was impossible; neither of them had seen her for fifteen years. Why would she turn up now? Especially since Remus had seen her many times before; he should have made the connection earlier if it was the truth.

"I never knew when the full moons were before I was bitten," Remus said, poking his breakfast in an attempt to rid it of the burnt part. "Not unless you're really interested in astronomy would you know that, or Professor Sinstra's drilled it into your head so you can't forget." He paused for a minute, and said, "You know you have to be registered today, otherwise the Ministry might not let you go back to school."

"Great… just how I wanted to spend my day."

"Well, your mother told me that once your brother wakes up we can leave. We'll go to St. Mungo's to make sure the bite is okay, no infections other than the ones intended. Then we'll head to the Ministry so you can get registered and then to Headquarters. So, you're all packed?"

"I think so. Did my stuff survive?"

Remus's face turned red when she questioned him. He knew that all of her stuff was safe; he hadn't eaten anything once he'd bitten her.

Her brother woke up an hour after breakfast and once he did the two were off for St. Mungo's where the Healers would assess the damage done. Remus was also able to find a crutch for Lily to walk on, as it was causing her great pain to walk with her leg bandaged up.

To get to St. Mungo's they had to go into the city where they would find an old store with a manikin in the window. Lily and Professor Lupin wandered casually around the streets, doing their best to blend in with the background. As they had been there only a few months before, they knew what to do so they wouldn't be noticed. The two approached an old building with a sign on it that read _Closed for Renovations_. The two knew that the store wasn't closed to be fixed. Apparently the shoppers in the area did not know that as they made comments about it as they passed. Professor Lupin walked up to the rusted manikin in the window display and murmured,

"Good morning." The head instantly snapped up and turned in an eerie manner towards the professor, who watched the scene with a bored expression. It studied Professor Lupin for a minute, before asking in a cool voice,

"Business?"

"Werewolf bite."

"Please, come in."

The glass window slowly began to melt away and the two stepped inside and, instead of finding themselves in an old store, they found themselves standing in the middle of a receptionist office. Professor Lupin led Lily up to the front desk, where a witch was busy writing on a notepad. He cleared his throat and the woman looked up, seeming rather annoyed at the interruption.

"How may I help you?" she asked slowly.

"We would like to go up to the Serious Bites Ward. She has a werewolf bite that needs to be checked."

The receptionist huffed, shuffled some papers on the desk, and pointed towards the staircase. "Up the stairs, a few floors up; you'll see a sign you can't miss."

"Thank you very much."

They turned towards the door she had pointed out and began the climb. The witch was right in saying it was only a few floors up with a sign they couldn't miss. They knew they had reached the floor when they saw a giant sign reading _Serious Bites Ward_. Professor Lupin pushed the door open and led the way down the hallway, where he found a spare room with a healer who seemed to be sitting at his leisure. Professor Lupin knocked loudly on the door and caught the healer's attention.

"How may I help you sir?" he asked.

"She has a werewolf bite that needs to be checked for any further damage," Remus responded promptly.

The doctor nodded and gestured for Lily to sit down on one of the chairs while he stooped down to remove the bandage. Once finished he crumpled it up and tossed it accurately in the trash bin behind him. He slowly examined the bite, which was still covered in blood, but the healer didn't seem to be bothered about it. He rubbed his chin thoughtfully and stood up after five minutes' examination. He rubbed his hands together and turned to Remus.

"There's nothing but the usual effects," he said, taking another glance down at the bite. "I'll just clean it up and then I suggest you go down to the Ministry so she can be registered."

"We were on our way there after we came here."

* * *

"Hullo, I need to see your wands before you can enter the Ministry."

Professor Lupin and Lily each pulled their wands out of their pockets and handed it to the security wizard standing in front of the entrance to the Ministry. The security wizard took them and quickly ran them through a check for verification and recited each of their names in turn and what materials their wands were made of. After verifying their wands and returning them to their owners, he allowed them into the Ministry of Magic where they were able to find a worker who led them to the Werewolf Registration Department. He took them up a flight of stairs and down a long corridor that led to where the department was.

As they walked farther down the hall they could tell they were getting closer to their destination, as the evidence of werewolf propaganda was increasing with every step. Remus remembered when he first came down this hallway for his registration when he was eight. How he dreaded the moment when they would take down his full name and he would forever be known as Remus John Lupin – Werewolf. He knew Lily was dreading the very same. This would only be worse for her since she had spent her time at Hogwarts building a name for herself and if anyone found out, it would all be taken away. Remus had it easier because he had no name to ruin. It still wasn't easy for him, and it wouldn't be easy for her.

The man stopped and gestured towards a door with a sign that read _Mr. Malcolm Green – Werewolf Head_. Remus thanked the man for his help and knocked loudly on the door. The two waited only a minute before the door swung open revealing a grizzled old man with a white, bushy moustache. He looked at the two for a second and his eyes rested on Remus, who gave the man a curious look.

"I remember you," he said in a weary voice. "Remus Lupin, eight when you came here for your registration. What brings you here today?"

"She does," Remus replied, jerking his head to Lily, who suddenly felt very embarrassed to be standing where she was.

"And when was she bitten?" Mr. Green asked. "More importantly, who did it?"

"Last night," Remus answered hesitantly. "And it was me. I forgot when the full moon was."

"Isn't that Werewolf Lesson 101?"

"Very funny, but can she get this over with, please?"

"Oh very well, very well! I see someone's in a hurry." Mr. Green stepped aside and Remus and Lily walked into a room that was decorated with pictures of werewolves plastering nearly every inch of the wall. There were shelves and shelves full of files and registration pictures. Remus took a seat next to the door while Lily and Mr. Green took seats at the desk.

"This is a very simple process," Mr. Green said to Lily in a kind voice. "We just need to know your basic information and get a blood sample to keep on record. You know how the Ministry loves to keep tabs on all of the half breeds." He laughed and grabbed a paper and a quill. "Now down to business, full name please."

"Lily Elizabeth Jameson," Lily answered without delay.

Mr. Green nodded and wrote her response down.

"Date of birth?"

"January 15th, 1980."

"Uh huh… parent's names?"

"Marie and Anthony."

"Siblings, and if so, ages?"

"A brother named Riley, 18 years old."

"Year in Hogwarts?"

"Sixth year."

"Is that your last year or the year you're entering."

"The year I'm entering, sir."

"Very good… That's all I need to know. Now, if you'll follow me into the next room I can get your blood sample and you'll be all set to go."

Lily grimaced at the thought of a blood sample. She hated needles; they always made her feel sick when she visited the doctor's as a child. Mr. Green led her into a room that resembled her Muggle doctor's office. There were also several file cabinets lining the walls and a refrigerator, which mostly likely contained the needles and vials. He nodded towards a stool and Lily took a seat on it while he went to prepare a needle. He had the needle prepared in no time at all and pulled a cotton ball of the counter. He rubbed the spot on her arm where he would place the needle.

He whistled away as he cleaned the tip of the needle and whistled even louder and (unless Lily's ears were deceiving her) more merrily. He looked at the spot carefully in his search for the vein to puncture. He smiled when he found it. He pinched the needle into the spot and ignored Lily's sharp intake of breath. He waited patiently until the entire vial was filled. He handed her a bandage and dismissed her. More than ready to get out of the room, Lily hopped off the stool and raced out of the room. When he saw her in the room, Professor Lupin stood up.

"Let's go," he said, pulling the door open.

"Is it always that fast?" she asked as they made their way down the empty hallway.

"As far as I can tell, yes. He was quick with me too. By reputation, he's known for not wanting to spend as much time with a werewolf as he needs to. Word is they roped him into the job with a good salary, though he has yet to receive it."

"Well, that wasn't that bad, I guess."

"It's not bad at first. I'm not trying to scare you, I'm just warning you. It won't be easy when your first full moon comes. It's always the most painful."

"I know. I kind of got the idea it would be painful last night. But I'm not going to complain; I'm just a little worried. What will everyone at the order say?"

"I don't know, but if they accept me than they have to accept you."

* * *

Remus was right in the end. The Order accepted her and treated her as the normally did. She wasn't exempt from chores, though they did mention she would be at least twice during the month. Lily couldn't help but notice they never mentioned the word "full moon." Not once when she was talking to them about it did they actually come out and say, "full moon." They always used another way to refer to it.

Remus was also right when he said the first full moon was painful. The night of the full moon she felt the worst pain she ever experienced in her life. It was as if thousands of tiny needles were piercing every inch of her body and slowly squeezing their way through her flesh. She retched so many times she lost count. When the pain finally subsided, it was only replaced by the biting and scratching of her wolfish self. She now knew what it was like to be Professor Lupin.

They all went off to school eventually. Remus left her with some good excuses for her various absences, hoping he had given her enough to last until Christmas. When he received an owl at the headquarters, he realised that they might need to see her before Christmas. It was the first weekend of November, when Remus got an owl from the Ministry of Magic about the werewolf registration. Remus wondered why they had sent it to him. It should have been sent straight to her parents. He opened the letter and saw that a copy had been sent to her parents as well, but what he saw under it wasn't what he had expected.

"How is this possible?" he whispered out loud. "I was right… it's true." He read the remainder of the letter, though he saw no need to. The most important information was at the very beginning. He left the letter on the kitchen table and hurried out of the room to find a piece of parchment and a quill. He needed to send a letter desperately. Settling himself back at the table, he began to write a short message, a message that would bring who he needed.

_Dear Rachael,_

_Come to Sirius's old house, now!_

_Love Remus._

That was short, sweet, and to the point, not to mention it also got his sister at the house very quickly. The day after Remus received the letter; his sister was knocking at the door, waiting impatiently for her brother to answer and all the while wondering what was so important that it couldn't wait. The door swung open and Remus swiftly pulled his sister inside before any of the Muggles saw a door appear out of nowhere. He brought her into the kitchen where the letter was.

"Remus, what was so –" she began, but Remus quickly cut her off.

"I found her."

"Who?"

"Don't pretend like you don't know! You know who I'm talking about."

"Remus, I doubt it's really her. Why would you just figure this out now? How do you even know what you're seeing?"

"Don't ask questions, just trust me. I know what I saw. Why would I lie to you about something like this?" Remus was frustrated. He knew his sister would've a hard time believing what he was telling her, but he never pictured her doubting him about it. He would never lie about such a thing.

"I know you wouldn't lie, it's just highly unlikely that you've found her. She's been gone for fifteen years. If you taught her three years ago, why didn't you realise who she was then? She's supposed to look a lot like I do, which also means she looks a lot like you." She didn't mean to come off so harshly about this. She had spent fifteen years seeing kids who resembled her, and not one of them was the real thing. Now for her brother to come and tell her this; she just had a hard time believing it could be true.

"I wasn't sure if I was just imagining things. If you heard the things she told me you would know it's her too. That's not all; the Healers sent the blood work results to us and her parents."

"Why would they send it to the Order?" She was confused now. What blood work was he even talking about? And why would he go to the Ministry of all places to get it? Unless, no… Remus didn't!

"It involves us. But that's beside the point. The point is, when they tested the blood it came up different from her parents' DNA. It came up with a makeup similar to yours. I know it's hard for you to believe, but I wouldn't lie about this. Just let me explain."

"Okay, Remus, explain!"

Remus went over to the table, retrieved the letter and handed it to his sister, who took it with an inquisitive glance at him. She unfolded the letter and began to read. As she read, Remus couldn't help but notice how wide her eyes got. She had to understand him now. There was no way she could doubt him after reading that letter.

"Remus," she said slowly, looking up from the letter. "How is this possible?"

"I don't know, but it is. We've finally found her."

"Remus, I've got to see her. If anyone's going to explain this, it has to be me."

Remus nodded and started out of the room for another piece of parchment. "Of course, who else would explain but you? Let me just owl Dumbledore. Hopefully he'll see it our way and she'll be here by the weekend."

* * *

When Professor Dumbledore received Remus's letter, he was more than happy to send Lily back to Grimmauld Place. He knew this would have a significant impact on both people. He decided to give her a week to deal with it before she had to return to school. He even found it hard to believe what had happened. Though he knew perfectly well it would happen someday, he never expected to see it. He was both happy and concerned. How would she take it?

This scene was only too familiar to Rachael. When she came into the kitchen to sit down, she suddenly remembered where she had seen this scene before. It was back in her second year, after she had followed her brother to the Whomping Willow. She had come back from the Hospital Wing and fallen asleep on the couch when she had this realistic dream. She now saw just how realistic it was. It was the very same girl who bore a striking resemblance to herself… and her eyes… they were only too well known as well. She knew very well where they came from. She just couldn't comprehend the moment, after fifteen years…

The girl, on the other hand, didn't seem too ecstatic about the meeting. She looked like she would rather be anywhere than where she was. She was glaring at Rachael, looking both frightened and angry. Rachael didn't know why she felt angry, as Remus hadn't said anything yet. She was probably mad about missing the Hogsmeade trip that was being held that weekend. As Rachael studied the girl, she noticed something disturbing about her appearance. Around her face were light pink scars and under her eyes were dark circles, making it look like she hadn't had much sleep recently. _Remus did…_

To her great luck, the awkward silence was broken by footsteps coming from the stairwell. Remus entered to room. He looked between the two occupants at the table and looked towards his sister.

"Rachael, this is Lily Jameson," he said in his most pleasant voice. "Lily, this is Rachael Lupin, my twin sister." Lily nodded and reached out to shake hands with Rachael, though she had no idea what Professor Lupin was talking about. "You're probably wondering why I took you out of school to meet her."

"The thought did cross my mind," Lily replied sarcastically.

"Well, I'm not the person to explain. My sister and this letter are the ones who can tell you what this is all about. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go meet Kingsley in Diagon Alley. See you later." And, before Lily could even stop him, Professor Lupin was out the door. She doubted he even had to go to Diagon Alley. Feeling defeated, Lily turned to Rachael, and waited for her to tell her what was going on.

"Well, you're probably wondering why you're here," Rachael said uneasily. Lily nodded her head, getting fed up with all of the stalling. "Well, this is odd for me to say… let me try this. When you look at pictures of you and your parents, did you ever notice that you look nothing like them?"

Lily thought for a moment. This person did have a point. Everyone in her family had blonde hair; she had brown, this was usually considered a bit odd. Now that she thought about it, her mum and brother had green eyes and her dad had brown, she had blue. _Okay she has a point, but that still doesn't explain anything_.

"Well, yeah, I don't look like anyone in my family," Lily admitted. "But, that's normal, isn't it?"

Rachael now had an opening, so she decided to take advantage of it.

"Yes, it is true," she agreed. "But, is it not a little strange to have DNA different than your parents'?"

Rachael waited for a reaction, but the one she got wasn't the one she was expecting. She had expected Lily to be mad, but instead she was laughing, as though she had heard the most hilarious joke.

"What's so funny?"

"What you just said!" Lily answered through her laughs. "You just said I'm not related to my parents. That's great!"

"That's nothing to laugh about."

"Yes it is! That's the dumbest thing I ever heard! Of _course_ I'm related to my parents. Why wouldn't I be?"

"You're related to me!"

This stopped her from laughing any further. Lily looked at her as though she had heard the most absurd thing in the world. She thought of laughing again, but when she saw the look on Rachael's face, she could tell she was serious. How in the world could she be serious? She couldn't be related to this woman. If she was, why hadn't she known?

"You're kidding, right?" she asked, hoping this was a joke.

"Who would kid about something like this? Read the letter, if you don't believe me."

Lily looked at her skeptically, but read the letter anyway. What she read, she didn't like. She didn't want to listen to what it said. It was wrong, it had to be. She couldn't be related to someone else… to a different family entirely.

"Do you believe me now?" Rachael asked once she saw Lily was finished.

"This is a lie," Lily answered, her voice shaking slightly. "It has to be."

"It's not a lie. I didn't trust it at first, but you have to consider the facts –"

"Let's consider the fact that the old guy was just a little off his rocker and decided this would be a nice joke to play. This isn't true… you're not my mother!" She wouldn't listen, she couldn't. This woman standing in front of her wasn't her mother! Her mother was back at her house. It was always that way, why did it have to change now?

"This isn't a joke. That man wasn't lying to you. Who would lie about something like this?"

"You would for starters." Lily closed her eyes in anger. This wasn't right, it was wrong! "This is all wrong!" she yelled out in aggravation. "You're not my mother! My mum is back at my house! Why are you doing this to me? As if being bitten by a werewolf wasn't enough to last me a lifetime? You have to come and tell me I've been adopted all these years?"

Rachael sighed, frustrated with this girl's lack of understanding. She wasn't lying. Why didn't she see this? She wanted to meet her daughter for fifteen years and now that she finally had the chance, her daughter was snubbing her and calling her a liar. She was just going to have to prove it…

"Look, I'm sorry all of this horrible stuff happened to you, but you are my daughter. If you won't believe the letter or me telling you, I'm just going to have to show you."

* * *

"_She's so pretty."_

"_She must've taken after her mother then."_

"_James!"_

"_What? You can't call a boy pretty. That just sounds wrong."_

"_He does have a point, you know._

"_Hey look, she has your eyes, Sirius."_

"_Lucky girl, right?" _

_Rachael nodded halfheartedly, just to get those three to stop acting so childish. She was surprised that Peter was acting the most mature out of all of them. That was a first. Remus was usually the one who held the maturity in their group. Now he was acting just as immature as his friends. Even Sirius was joining in. He was going to have a great influence on his daughter. _

_Remus cleared his throat and looked down at the bundle his sister was holding._ _"So what are you naming her?" _

_Rachael looked down at her daughter and over to Lily who was standing in the background. "How do you like this? I'm going to name her after someone who's always been there for me, for as long as I can remember."_

"_You mean you're naming her Jamie?" James piped up. _

_Sirius rolled his eyes._ _"Of course, James," he said sarcastically. "I want my daughter to be named after you, of all people. We're naming her Siriusa!"_

"_Is that even a name?" Peter snickered. _

"_No, we're naming her Lily!" Rachael cut in through their laughs. "Lily is the person who's always been there for all of us, no matter what."_

_Lily smiled, obviously embarrassed, but clearly pleased._

"_Thank you," she managed to say._

"_Any time. Just remember, Sirius is going to be begging you to name your son after him now." _

_Sirius, pretending to look insulted, turned away, and said, "No I'm not." _

_James shook his head and stepped forward._

"_Well, we've got to be going," he said, stooping down to give Rachael a hug and slapping Sirius on the back. "Let it be known that on this day, January 15th, 1980, Sirius and Rachael Black have become parents to this beautiful little girl. Come on, Lily, Peter, Remus, I believe we have an Order meeting at our house. Good night, see you in the morning." _

_The four exited the room, leaving Rachael, Sirius and their daughter alone._

"_So," said Sirius, sitting down next to the hospital bed. "Have any ideas for a middle name?"_

"_No, you have any?"_

"_Well, I've always been partial to the name Elizabeth. How does that sound? Lily Elizabeth Black."_

"_I like it."_

_Sirius smiled and looked down at his daughter, hardly believing that he was now a father to such a beautiful baby. She was perfect to him in every way. Her hair was a light shade of brown. Her eyes a bright blue colour. He couldn't imagine ever having a more beautiful baby. _

"_She looks just like you," he said. "James was right, she did take after you."_

"_I wonder what would happen if his son ended up looking like him?"_

"_The world isn't big enough for two of him. There wouldn't be enough egos for everyone else."_

"_True," Rachael agreed. "We've already inflated it enough by making him her godfather and Lily her godmother. We're not helping the matter."_

"_No, we aren't."_

_Sirius yawned and said he was going to get some sleep. He gave Rachael a kiss on the forehead and settled down in his chair. _

_Once Sirius was asleep Rachael looked down at Lily, this was her child… hers and Sirius's. They were parents now and this was their child._

* * *

Lily looked at Rachael, completely dumbfounded at what she had just seen. The scene was far too detailed and accurate for it to be made up. The way it was shown made her deem it true. She wasn't Lily Elizabeth Jameson. Instead she was Lily Elizabeth Black. Everything was making sense, finally. She had spent the past few months feeling miserable about Sirius's death. She had felt like she had lost her own father. Now, she finally knew that she had really lost her father. She just didn't know it was him. She sighed and looked up at Rachael.

"I'm sorry," she said sincerely. "It's just… I've been having a hard time since the summer and now to find out that I never knew my real parents. I didn't know how to react, so I just yelled."

"It's okay. If I was you I'd feel the same way." Rachael sat down at the table and took the letter back. "It's strange how something like this could bring out the truth, I've been wondering where you ended up for years and the way I found out was through your werewolf registration papers."

Lily tried to smile, though it wasn't in the least bit funny. But what Rachael had said made her wonder. "Why did you give me up? From what you showed me, it seemed like you and Sirius were really happy."

"We were really happy. That's why I've been trying to find out where you were. Look, you know what happened the night Voldemort fell, when Harry defeated him. I thought Sirius had really done it. I thought Sirius had betrayed Lily and James. I didn't want to, but all signs pointed to him, and he had been acting so strangely…"

* * *

_It was a cold Halloween night, one that was perfect for trick or treaters who were eager to go out in their costumes and get candy from the neighbours. This wasn't one year to go out, not with all the horrible things that had been going on, not when the war was at its peak and the risk of going outside was too great. They would've to wait until next year._

_Rachael sat on the couch in the living room, gently rocking Lily to sleep. The howling wind had woke her up and she wasn't able to fall asleep. Rachael had a bad feeling. There was something about the howling of that wind and the darkness of the night made her feel something bad was going to happen, something that could possibly change their lives forever. Sirius was apparently having the same feeling, as he couldn't stop pacing across the room and looking out the window, as though he was expecting the Dark Lord to appear at their porch at any minute. _

"_Sirius, stop pacing!" she said at last. "You're making the baby nervous." _

_Sirius sighed and sat down in the chair behind him, attempting to stay still, though he couldn't prevent his knee from hopping uncontrollably. _

"_I'm sorry," he said. "I just have a bad feeling… like something's wrong with James and Lily."_

"_What do you mean? They're safe as long as you kept their location a secret. Why would you be worried? You said it yourself that you would rather die before betraying them."_

"_And I would! It's just… listen I'll be back later. I need to check on Peter."_

"_Sirius-"_

"_I'll be fine. You just stay here. I'll be back later."_

_But Sirius never came back. Rachael waited up for hours, hoping that he would come home. She dreaded that something might have happened to him. All of the members of the Order of the Phoenix were on the top of Voldemort's list, him most of all, along with James and Lily. That was why they were forced into hiding with their son, Harry. Sirius was their Secret Keeper. He wouldn't betray them… he couldn't. _

_There was a sharp knock at the door. Rachael jumped up and pulled her wand out of her pocket._

"_Rachael, it's Remus!" came her brother's voice from outside. "Let me in, I need to tell you something." _

_Rachael sighed in relief and let him in. The moment Remus stumbled into the room; she could tell something was wrong. Remus's face was red and his eyes were shining. Remus was never one to cry unless something really horrible had happened. Her worst fears were confirmed._

"_Remus, what happened?"_

"_Its James and Lily," he chocked. "Rachael… they're dead. I was just down at Godric's Hollow. Their house was in flames. We brought the bodies to a morgue not too far from there… Hagrid helped. He's bringing Harry to his aunt and uncle's. Harry survived. He defeated Voldemort."_

"_Remus, what-"_

"_Sirius betrayed them! He gave their location to Voldemort. He betrayed Lily and James. I'm sorry." _

_Rachael didn't say anything. She just stared at her brother. How could this be true? How could Sirius just go and betray his best friends? And his godson, for goodness's sake! He was their best friend and he went and killed them! She rubbed her eyes and took a shuddering breath. This wasn't true, she told herself. It couldn't be true. That would explain why he was so nervous earlier…_

"_Remus…"_

"_I'm sorry." _

_Remus pulled his sister into a hug, both of them crying, neither of them knowing what else to do. Sirius had not only betrayed Lily, James and Harry… he had betrayed Remus, his wife and his daughter. Sirius Black was truly gone forever._

* * *

"_Keep her safe here. Please, don't let anything bad happen to her."_

"_We'll keep her safe, Ms. Lupin. Don't worry about it."_

"_Thank you, Professor. I just can't believe this is happening." _

_Professor McGonagall nodded solemnly, her eyes looking bloodshot. It was the night after Halloween and Rachael found herself at an orphanage. It was a special orphanage that was open to both wizards and Muggles. Professor McGonagall helped run it. As she took Lily away from her mother, she reassured her that her daughter would be safe. They would find the perfect family for her. _

"_I can't keep her, not with Sirius around. Who knows what could happen," Rachael said, struggling to keep her voice in check. _

"_I can't understand this any more than you can," the professor agreed. "Sirius was always such a good kid, mischievous yes, but his heart was always in the right place."_

"_I guess his parents' influence got the best of him… I should go now. Promise me, Professor, that she'll be safe. I don't want her to remember any of this until I find her. I don't want anyone else to tell her what happened."_

"_Don't worry. We'll take good care of her."_

"_Thank you." Rachael walked over to the cradle her daughter was sleeping in and leaned over, giving her a kiss on the forehead. "Goodbye Lily…"_

* * *

"I wasn't able to locate you after everything had settled down," Rachael said, staring down at the table. "The orphanage was burned down by Death Eaters who had wormed their way out of arrestment. All of the files of where the orphans had been sent were lost."

"But Sirius was innocent," Lily breathed. "He never betrayed anyone."

"No one had any proof, everyone believed him to be guilty. Remus thought it was him, I did, everyone did. No one wanted to think it was him, but that was what everyone thought. And I only put you up for adoption because I thought you would be safe. I loved you so much and I didn't want anything to happen to you. I just want you to love me as much."

"I'm sorry… I just don't know what to think. I don't know what to call you or what to say to you. You're really my mother."

The two heard footsteps approaching the room and it shocked them, as the room was quiet, with the exception of Rachael's storytelling. They looked over to see Remus coming into the room.

"How's it going?" he asked.

"And if you're my mother," Lily said slowly, looking between Remus and Rachael. "He's my uncle."

* * *

It was a grey day out, and it was best kept that way, as the mood of everyone in the cemetery was grey as well. The small group listened as Professor Dumbledore delivered his eulogy, standing behind a gravestone engraved:

_Here lies Remus John Lupin  
1960 -1997  
Died in the line of duty  
R.I.P_

Remus had died the night before in a battle against Death Eaters. He had put up a good fight, but still being weak from the full moon, the Death Eaters proved stronger. He was struck down with a Killing Curse sent by Lucius Malfoy. His body was recovered and sent to Hogwarts where the last four people who should have seen it, were the ones who walked in to see it being carted to Professor Dumbledore's office. Harry, Lily, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley walked down an empty corridor to see his body being wheeled past them. Their hearts stopped.

Now, they were all standing in the funeral party, listening as Dumbledore concluded his eulogy.

"He was a brilliant and caring man… but war takes away the best of people. This time it was him." Professor Dumbledore bowed his head and the group dispatched.

Lily broke away from her friends and made her way to Rachael, who was staring at the gravestone, her eyes shining with tears.

"It isn't fair," she whispered. "Remus, of all people?"

"War isn't supposed to be fair. It's supposed to be deadly," Lily said, looking down at the stone as well. The tombstone next to Remus's caught her attention. It read: _Here lies Gregory H. Lupin_.

"Mum, is that Grandpa?" she asked.

Rachael nodded, realising this was the first time she had recognised anyone in their family by the appropriate name. She had called Rachael by her first name ever since their first meeting. This was the first time she called her mum. She couldn't help but smile.

"He died when we were in our fifth year," she explained.

"Oh… well, if that's where he's buried, where's Grandma? Is she still alive?"

"Yes, she's – right over there." Rachael nodded towards a spot across the cemetery where she saw her mother, someone she hadn't seen for years. Her mother looked up from her spot and her eyes met Rachael's. Rachael didn't know what to do, if she should walk the other way, or approach her. Both seemed appealing, but she had to do the latter. She had to make amends with her mother and now was as good a time as any. She led Lily through the crowd and cautiously approached her mother.

"Mum?" she asked uncertainly.

"Hullo," her mother whispered.

"I…um… I have someone for you to meet. You always told me when I was younger, before everything happened, that you wanted me to give you a granddaughter. Remember?"

"Yes, I do remember."

"Well, here she is. Mum, I'd like you to meet your granddaughter, Lily Elizabeth Black. You never knew about her. You never knew me and Sirius got married. You didn't know any of this and I just want you to know now."

Mrs. Lupin looked from her daughter to Lily, who looked some much like Rachael and yet her eyes still reminded her of the boy who told her off the first night he stayed over their house during Remus's second year. Just by looking into her granddaughter's blue eyes suddenly made everything make sense. She now knew how horrible of a mother she had been. She now realised how sorry she was.

"I'm sorry," she whispered sincerely. "My granddaughter, Lily…" She looked up at Rachael and, for the first time in years, pulled her into a hug and said, "Rachael… my daughter."

_**The End**_


End file.
